Title – The Price We Pay 6/12

Rating – PG-13/T

Disclaimer – I own none of this, it all belongs to Rowling. I just have the honor of using her creations in my story. No slash, sex or profanity.

Summary – Memories and retiring Headmasters.

A/N – Huge thanks again to all my reviewers! Sorry if this chapter is kind of short, I wanted to get it out quickly. All reviews, questions, comments and suggestions are welcome! Read and enjoy!

Just to let you know from now on Italics indicate flashbacks or memories.

The Price We Pay

Chapter 5

As the last of the carriages taking the students to the Hogsmeade train station passed through the school gates, Dumbledore heaved a great sigh and discreetly wiped a few wistful tears from his eyes. It was over. Decades of service to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry had come to a triumphant and happy end. He was now Headmaster of that grand school in name only and soon he would simply be Albus Dumbledore, plain old wizard. When the next school year started the students would have a new Headmistress, who would most certainly hold her own amongst the previous Heads of Hogwarts. Thinking of the great job Minerva would do made Dumbledore very happy indeed and reduced the pain of his eventual departure. There was no one else he would want to follow in his large footsteps than Minerva McGonagall.

The witch currently dominating his thoughts suddenly appeared at his side and followed his gaze out across the grounds. It was a surprisingly pleasant July day with a few clouds scattered across a bright blue sky and a cool breeze drifting in from the lake. They stood in front of the doors of the castle, enjoying the weather and company, each lost in their own melancholy thoughts. They were silent for there would be time for tears and goodbyes later. Finally McGonagall adjusted the brim of her hat and said,

"I have scheduled the interviews for the applicants for tomorrow afternoon. Although so many applied for the Charms position that we may need to spread it out over two days."

"Yes, that sounds like a wise move. Remus Lupin owled me yesterday to accept the Transfiguration position. He was pleased to hear Harry wanted to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts and gracefully surrendered the job to him. You might want to think about making Remus Head of Gryffindor as well." Dumbledore replied, letting his thoughts wander to the two former Gryffindors. It was obvious Harry was very talented at Defense Against the Dark Arts, but not many knew of his desire to spread his knowledge and experiences to others. His dreams of becoming an Auror had faded as the war progressed, vanishing completely when Harry said he was tired of fighting and had no desire to work for the Ministry. His future suddenly undecided, Harry had jumped at the chance to stay at Hogwarts and teach something he was good at. He would be the youngest professor ever, even younger than when Snape had started, but Dumbledore was confident his skills with magic and students would more than make up for his young age.

"A Marauder as Head of Gryffindor? The world has come to an end now." They shared a smile, "Vector has agreed to take over as Head of Ravenclaw, as well as Selene with Slytherin. That just leaves Potions and Charms to be filled." McGonagall continued and the pair mourned the loss of Filius Flitwick. The tiny Charms professor had died maintaining the wards of the castle during the attack and his death had shaken a staff already reeling from the disappearance of Snape. They suspected Ravenclaw would mourn the loss of their Head well into the next school year.

"We should find suitable candidates for both tomorrow. Once the Board of Governors officially approves your appointment to Headmistress we can begin the arduous process of moving you up to your new office."

Silence fell yet again as they were overcome with emotion at that simple statement. To McGonagall it finalized the realization that she would be in charge of Hogwarts soon, and that Dumbledore, the heart and soul of the school for decades, would be gone. But she was prepared; one did not become Deputy Headmistress without some experience running the school and knowing how the system worked. To Dumbledore his words drove home the point that Hogwarts was no longer a part of his life and it was time to move on. They stood for a bit longer, lost in fond memories until Dumbledore stirred and said,

"Time to head back in. We can discuss the interviews over lunch."

McGonagall nodded and they walked back into the castle. They moved to continue up the stairs but stopped and smiled at the sight that greeted them.

Snape was slowly working his way down the stairs, leaning heavily on Pomfrey, but walking down them nonetheless. The nurse was gripping his elbow and watching where Snape was carefully putting his feet. It was his first time out of the Hospital Wing and it was both amusing and heartbreaking to see Snape staring around like an awe-struck first year. His brow was furrowed as he clearly tried to remember more about Hogwarts, his home for a good portion of his life. The wizard moved slowly but confidently, the only sign of his exhaustion and struggle was his slightly laboured breathing. He smiled however when he spotted Dumbledore and McGonagall waiting at the bottom.

"I wanted to see more of the castle…maybe go outside. It's a nice day for a walk…don't you think?" Snape said when they reached the bottom of the stairs. He untangled his arm from Pomfrey's grasp and immediately latched onto Dumbledore, black eyes silently pleading for agreement. Dumbledore shared an apprehensive look with Pomfrey. He was not sure if Snape was strong enough to be up and walking around yet. The nurse simply smiled and said,

"He's been asking me all morning to go outside and I don't see anything wrong with a short walk. It would do his bones some good."

Snape was practically glowing in anticipation, eyes darting toward the doors of the castle. He tugged absently on Dumbledore's arm and the older wizard found he could not say no to his request.

"Very well Severus. We can walk to the lake and back. How does that sound?"

His reply was another brilliant grin from Snape, which he savoured and stored away in his heart. Smiles were something the old Snape would never have given unless it was in the form of an evil grin or amused smirk. But now Snape readily smiled and it was one of the few positive changes from his experience that they were all thankful for. It was still surreal seeing the former irritable Potions master smile so easily and they encouraged it at every opportunity. Dumbledore returned the smile and allowed the younger wizard to lead him out of the castle into the bright sunshine.

Snape blinked to allow his eyes to adjust to the sun and held onto Dumbledore for support as they walked. Physical weakness would be a problem until he regained most of his lost weight and while he was frustrated that he still needed help to get around he would do anything to simply get out of the boring Hospital Wing. He had been unhappy looking at the beautiful summer day from his window and wanted to go outside, to feel the sun on his skin and a breeze in his hair. Three weeks of being restricted to the empty wing had grated on his nerves and short attention span. He was getting tired of sleeping and sitting and wanted to do something to remember more of who he was. He wanted to regain what Voldemort and other Death Eaters had taken from him. Stopping that line of thought before it led to other, more unpleasant memories, Snape turned his head toward Dumbledore and asked,

"What is your best memory…of Hogwarts Albus?"

Dumbledore stroked his beard with his free hand and looked across the lake in serious contemplation.

"Hmm, a very good question. I have so many; I don't think I could name just one. There is my first day as a professor and becoming Headmaster. Every Sorting and Leaving Feast. Yule Balls, staff meetings, the Tri-Wizard Tournament. Right now."

Snape's eyes widened before he suddenly looked away in embarrassment. He trusted and loved the other wizard as a mentor and protector, but was a little uncomfortable expressing his emotions. He figured it was a problem he had in the past, as Dumbledore did not seem really troubled by it, and he worked to control his wildly changing emotions and moods. But sometimes proclamations like that would catch him off guard and with his mood shifts he was afraid he would burst into tears right there. A slight squeeze on his arm brought him back to what Dumbledore was saying,

"You know Severus when I leave here I was planning on bringing you with me. I don't know if you remember when I was telling you earlier. You can't stay here when Poppy leaves for the summer and I certainly won't admit you to St. Mungo's, so I decided it would be in your best interest to stay with me while you recover. I know you would like my summer cottage; it's right on the beach. What do you say Severus? Is that all right with you?"

Snape stopped and stared at him in amazement. Was that all right with him? Of course it was all right with him. His heart swelled with so many feelings that he was rendered speechless, eyes filling with tears of joy. The control he was managing to hold over his emotions crumbled under that honest gaze and twinkling blue eyes. He weakly nodded his head and burst into tears. Worried at this unexpected reaction Dumbledore pulled him into a much needed hug and asked,

"Severus? Are you ok? What's wrong?"

"No-nothing's wr-wrong!" Snape stuttered, clutching tighter to the other wizard. "I would love to come with you! To not be afraid or alone…" He burst into another crying episode, but after a few minutes he was able to calm himself. Exhausted now from the walk and announcement, Snape sagged against Dumbledore even more and let him guide them back to the castle. They spoke quietly of various plans for the summer, enjoying the wonderful weather and memories of Hogwarts. The pair was heading back to the Hospital Wing when a familiar voice stopped them,

"Headmaster Dumbledore! Can I speak to you for a minute?"

They turned around to watch Harry Potter catch up to them and stop a few feet away. His green eyes widened in shock as he openly stared at them. Whatever questions he had fled from his mind as he got his first look at Snape. He was the first student besides Malfoy to see their former potions professor in over 8 months and the last bits of his hatred melted away upon seeing Snape again. Snape was thin, pale and his black eyes looked inquisitively at Harry. There was no way he could hate this shadow of his despised former professor and caught Dumbledore's smile of approval from the corner of his eye. The Headmaster turned back to Snape asking,

"Severus do you remember Mr. Potter? He was your student in potions."

Snape's eyes narrowed in concentration as he stared back at Harry, his mind sorting through the memories that were available to him concerning Potters. Both Harry and Dumbledore waited anxiously to see what Snape would remember about the father and son he used to loathe.

"James? No…Harry." Snape finally replied with a small instinctive sneer. "Annoying Gryffindor. The Boy Who Lived." He paused and looked at Harry with an unreadable expression on his face. "I am…pleased…to see you survived the war. . .Potter."

Surprisingly, Harry grinned. It was the closest to a complement he would ever get from Snape. Still smiling, he answered,

"I'm glad to see you survived as well sir. I can wait to speak to you later Headmaster. I just had a few questions concerning my lesson plans for next year. It's good seeing you Professor Snape." The young hero then continued on his way, leaving Snape to stare after him confusedly. Dumbledore waited with a barely contained smile while Snape worked out what Harry was talking about. Suddenly Snape straightened his shoulders and looked at Dumbledore suspiciously, eyes wide in disbelief. Here was the Snape of old making an appearance. It still amazed Dumbledore that one moment Snape could be as docile and needy as a child and the other moment be as commanding and irreverent as he used to be.

"Tell me you did not hire…Potter…to teach here. Are you completely insane…Albus?"

"No more than the average wizard. And I didn't hire him Severus. Minerva did. Harry will make a fine Defense Against the Dark Arts professor don't you think?" Replied Dumbledore as he led a thoroughly bewildered and shocked Snape back to the Hospital Wing. "Relax Severus. It's something Harry wanted to do and has become quite good at. I dare say he might have learned a thing or two about teaching from you,"

But Snape was no longer listening to what the other wizard was saying. Words from the previous conversation were suddenly causing new memories to become crystal clear in the fog of his mind. Snape had already slipped back into another painful memory of his past.

- & -

It was late, too late to be walking the halls alone, as a second year Snape finally left the library and headed back to the Slytherin dorms. He had been working on his Defense Against the Dark Arts essay all night and was very proud of his hard work. It was not due for another two days but he was eager to get started and make sure it was perfect. He would surely earn another perfect score with this assignment. Severus was so engrossed in rereading his essay that he was completely taken by surprise when he collided with someone and fell to the ground.

"Well, well what do we have here? Snivellus alone at night? Quite a catch wouldn't you say James?" Came the taunting voice of Sirius Black.

Severus immediately reached for his wand, however he was no match for the four Marauders.

"Expelliarmus!" Severus watched in growing anger and fear as his wand flew into Black's hand. Peter Pettigrew was helping James Potter from off the ground and Remus Lupin was standing behind his friends, looking around for wandering professors.

"A very good catch Sirius. What else do we have here?" Potter replied and reached down to grab his essay, which had fallen from his hand in the collision. Severus lunged for it, but was grabbed and held back by Black and Pettigrew. Potter picked up his essay and unrolled it. Severus cursed under his breath and demanded,

"Give it back Potter!"

"I don't think so Snivelly. Let's see, I think we can make some changes to this."

Severus watched helplessly as Potter used his wand to make irreparable changes to his once perfect essay. He lashed out at Black and Pettigrew, but with his smaller size he could not break free.

"You know what, on second thought I don't think this is good enough to even hand in. You'll have to start over Snivellus." Potter said with a mocking smile, "Incendio!"

The essay he spent hours working on burst into flame and the ashes fell to the floor in front of him. Severus glared murderously at Potter, too angry and tired to strike back. The others laughed and Black returned his wand when they were safe from retaliation. Their laughter haunted him all the way down to the dungeons.

- & -

"Severus? Are you all right? Severus!"

With effort Snape came back to the present and looked into Dumbledore's concerned eyes. He shook his head to clear the remnants of the memory from his mind and tried to appear like he was fine. He smiled and said firmly,

"I'm fine Albus. Just another…memory."

Dumbledore said nothing and peered at him closely. He knew Snape was lying to him, but he did not want to test the fragile shields of the healing mind to find out more of the memory he had just relived. Letting the matter go for now he said,

"All right Severus. Let's go have lunch."

Snape gave a small sigh of relief and followed Dumbledore into the Hospital Wing, oblivious to the worried twinkle in a pair of bright blue eyes.

- & -

"Albus, where would you put this book?"

"Put that one in the 'History' box Severus."

Snape twisted from his place on the floor, searching for the box labelled 'History' and placed the heavy, leather bound book inside. Picking up the next book from one of many bookshelves in Dumbledore's office he looked at the title, thought about it for a minute and finally placed it in the box labelled 'Ancient Magic.' He was currently packing away Dumbledore's incredibly large book collection for transport to his summer home. It was a job Snape was taking very seriously; although Dumbledore could have performed the task in seconds with a wave of his wand, it allowed him to keep an eye on Snape, while giving the healing wizard something productive to do and escape the confines of Madame Pomfrey. The nurse had finally released the binding spells on his hands and though they were still somewhat crooked and stiff Snape could now use them. Pomfrey insisted on keeping a trained medical eye on them and he had leaped at the chance to escape her fussing. Snape was content to spend the entire afternoon on the floor in Dumbledore's-soon-to-be-McGonagall's office helping him prepare everything to be flooed. He was amazed at the sheer amount of knick-knacks, magical artifacts and books the older wizard had managed to accumulate over the decades; they had spent two whole days cleaning and sorting through everything and all the books still had to be sorted and packed in properly labelled boxes. That was Snape's responsibility.

"What about this one Albus?"

"Hmm, I didn't even know I had that one. Must have been a gift. Most of the books here are gifts actually. Oh a few I bought myself and some are family volumes but,"

"Albus! The book?"

"Oh yes, sorry my boy. Put that one in the 'Flora and Fauna' box."

They worked in steady silence until the arrival of a large brown owl flew in through an open window to land on Dumbledore's now empty desk. Snape looked curiously at it, but Dumbledore frowned and reached out to roughly tear the letter from the owl's leg. The owl hooted indignantly at them before disappearing back out the window. With a scowl reminiscent of the old Snape on his face, Dumbledore unfolded and read the letter. The letter was then cast into the flames of the fire and the retiring Headmaster silently resumed sorting through his books. Snape waited for a minute, not wanting to upset his friend any further, before quietly asking,

"What was the…letter about Albus? Who was it from?"

Dumbledore remained silent, reigning in his growing anger in case he frightened Snape. He turned to look at the younger wizard, sitting amidst a large pile of books and boxes, watching him with large, concerned black eyes. His pale face was so calm, trying so hard to hide the pain, terror and confusion that lay just underneath the surface. Dumbledore would do anything in his power to keep that pain from surfacing, but as much as it hurt him to think it, there were some times even he had to bow to the demands of others. He walked over to where Snape was sitting and seated himself next to him.

"That letter was from Minister Fudge. He wants to question you one week from today concerning your spying activities and imprisonment. He seems to think you might know something about certain missing Death Eaters. I'm so sorry Severus."

Frowning, Snape stared at him, trying to come to terms with what was being asked of him. He reached out and unconsciously grasped the end of the long white beard in one hand, a reaction he had developed over the course of the last month when confused or scared and mumbled,

"I don't understand. I thought you said Fudge…wouldn't bother us anymore. What happened?"

"I know and I'm terribly sorry my boy," Dumbledore sighed, "But Fudge has threatened to commit you to St. Mungo's and bring charges against me for interfering in an official investigation. He knew exactly what buttons to press to get me to cooperate. Believe me, I would have nothing to do with the Ministry, but Fudge appears to be very serious with his threats this time. I won't risk losing you Severus. Please trust me."

Snape thought about this and a shudder passed through him. On one hand he had no desire whatsoever to relive all the horrible memories he tried to keep buried, but on the other hand he did not want to be separated from Dumbledore. It was an easy decision to make. He finally nodded, leaning wearily against Dumbledore, eyes slipping shut.

"I'll be with you and won't let them take advantage of you. It will be all right. We'll move to the house in a few days and get settled in before dealing with Fudge. It'll be a long week, but I will be right beside you."

Dumbledore sat staring at the fire across the room, thinking of all the painful deaths he could inflict on Fudge if he brought any more pain to Snape. He would comply with the Minister's demands, but he was not going to allow that paranoid imbecile to take advantage of Snape's fragile mental state. They were going to do this interview his way or not at all, consequences be damned.

Looking down Dumbledore started to rouse Snape and stopped when he saw the younger wizard was fast asleep. He still had trouble staying awake for long periods, falling asleep frequently when troubled or drained. Smiling gently, he levitated Snape to a nearby couch and covered him in a blanket warmed with a heating charm. He brushed back some loose strands of black hair from the sleeping man's face and returned to sorting through his never-ending book collection. With a grim sigh Dumbledore knew it was going to be a very long week indeed.

TBC

I don't know if I like this chapter but it sets things up for the next one. I also don't know if Harry was very in character but I like to think he would have matured enough to let his hate go. So let me know what you think! Chapter 6 will be out soon!