Disclaimer: Do not own the Wonderful World of Harry Potter… not making any money from my writings…DO NOT LIKE that Rowling has killed Sirius Black and have chosen to pointedly ignore that certain part, allowing him to make an appearance here…

Note to readers: your reviews are only welcome in these types of formats: praise, gushing, skepticism, flames, anger, denial, repulse/disgust, and I suppose constructive criticism can be entertained as well…

A/N: Warning: Snape/McGonagall appearance starting from this chapter, will get worse as story progresses, or as worst can be without increasing the ratings. Also be prepared for unorthodox reaction of Harry towards Snape and Snape's unSnapeish behavior

Just a note: This is a continuation of another fic I wrote earlier, that was… let's say the stepping stone of McGonagall and Snape's relationship… I didn't/won't post it coz it's about Charlie Weasley and my OFC (Julianna Montgomery) and that's not really hot stuff here. It takes place in fifth year for the dream team and they were kidnapped by Voldermort at the end of that year. You don't have to read that to understand this, but I do make some reference to it occasionally. Also, note that Julianna and Charlie are married and have a little girl, Lizzie… you'll meet them later in the fic… probably around Christmas… ^_^… that's all…

~*@*~

DOUBLE WARNING: INTENSE ANGST! STAY CLEAR IF NOT EMOTIONALLY PREPARED!! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

(Have you ever made popular by S Club 7)

Jessica pushed her hair out of her face. Why hadn't she thought to tie it up? The green meadows in front of her were a sight for sore eyes, but it did nothing to still the storm in her heart. Yesterday's conversation with Julianna still played in her head. She really was confused. Julianna's hidden meaning didn't go unnoticed. Sure, she thought about Harry a lot and it bugged her he wasn't talking to her. But did she love him? Is that what she's feeling? Love. Was she capable of such an emotion? And how does Harry feel? He only thinks of her as a friend, nothing more surely. He's extremely close to Ginny, so maybe he's still holding a torch for her. Jessica quickly squashed the thought. Thinking about him and Ginny made her angry. Someone sat beside her and the glimpse of black hair made her hopes rise, to only have it drop when she saw it was Sirius. Her feelings must have shown on her face as he laughingly remarked.

"Sorry to disappoint you," he said. Jessica blushed. Whoops.

"I'm not disappointed. I enjoy your company," she said, turning a little to him. Sirius was looking out into the horizon.

"Beautiful isn't it?' he said. Sometimes he wanted to pinch himself. It was hard to believe that he was truly free. No more dementors, no more ugly Fudge, no more running. 

"Yes," she replied softly. The two sat in silence. Two birds had landed in front of them, picking the ground for food.

"Do you know a bird can live its entire life with only one partner? A rarity for animals," he said. Jessica said nothing.

"They'll only settle down if they find their soul mate and don't stop searching until they find their other half. I always remember Harry parents when I see a pair of birds," he continued. Jessica perked up. Harry's parents? Jessica had never thought of asking Harry or anyone else about Harry's parents. It had always been a grief spot to people so her questions always remained unanswered. She didn't even know their names.

"James and Lily Potter were a match made in heaven," said Sirius again. Jessica's eyes widen. Lily?

"Lily?" her voice was stuck in her throat. Lily? Did she hear wrong? Was it a coincidence… or providence?

"Yeah, Harry's mother. She was James soul mate," he continued. Even now, Sirius couldn't think about his two best friends without feeling guilty and miserable. If only… he quickly blinked the tears away. Jessica's next words stunned him.

"My middle name is Lily," she replied, wonder in her voice. Sirius blinked hard. Her middle name…

"Harry's middle name is James," he replied, his tone matched hers. That was too big a coincidence…

"Could it be…? Surely it's more than a coincidence," he said, almost to himself then laughed.

"I should have known James and Lily's love was too stubborn to die. From what I see, Jessica, it seems you were meant to meet Harry. Heaven had created another match," he said softly to her. Jessica couldn't bring herself to speak. Oh my God! It hit her like a ton of bricks.

"Jessica Lily Stanford, are you going to deny Harry what heaven itself has given him… and you?" he asked.

Jessica didn't hear his questions. Acuity was ringing loudly in her ears…

She's in love with Harry Potter!

I love Harry… Jessica was still in shock. I love Harry….

Without another word, she got to her feet and walked back to the house, her mind not really there. No, it was lost somewhere between the wonderful fluffy clouds of love. Probably having tea with Cupid.

I must find Harry.

She wanted to tell him, to yell it at him, to tell him how wrong she was and she was ready. Ready to trust him with her heart and all that came with it.

If only the chance had arisen.

Since it was time to return to Hogwarts, Jessica had no time to talk to him. She was busy packing her stuff, her own worries heightened by the worries of everyone else, that she couldn't even think of her new found feelings  much less approach him with it.

On the train, she had to sit with other girls as Hermione, Ron and Harry were in the prefect's section so that was another lost chance. But it also didn't help that Harry had caught sight of the two on the hill that day as it made him feel betrayed by the two people he loved and that only added fuel to his anger and jealousy, meaning he avoided Jessica like the plague. He made sure there were no chances that he and Jessica should 'accidentally' meet. If she was in the common room, then he'd be in his room. During classes, he resumed his seating arrangement of sitting next Ron and would disappear after class ended. Other times he'd be in the quidditch pitch running laps with his Firebolt. Of course, Jessica tried her best to get him to talk, or at least look at her, but his jealousy and hurt was strong. Too strong to allow any form of reconciliation.

But she wasn't giving up.

@~~}~~

"Ah Hermione, have you seen my potions textbook?" asked Jessica. It was Friday night, a week after they had arrived back at Hogwarts. She and Hermione were in their room trying to complete Snape's horrible homework. Hermione looked up from her potions book.

"No, I haven't but feel free to use mine when I'm done," she offered. Jessica shook her head.

"It's not that, my notes are in my book," she cried. Why does this always happen when she's got a deadline to meet?

"Maybe it's downstairs in the common room," Hermione suggested.

"Yeah, I'll go check," sighed Jessica. It was nearly midnight and between classes and chasing Harry, she was exhausted. But at the thought of losing more house points, she dragged herself downstairs. Suddenly she stopped as the landing. She couldn't believe her luck. She had finally cornered him. Sitting in front of the fire was Harry Potter, completely immersed in his thoughts.

She was going to sneak up on him, whisper in his ear that she loved him and snog him so hard, he won't be able to think of anything else for a week. Her plan was foolproof. She slowly crept towards him, but slinked back into the shadow when the common room door opened. It was Neville.

"Hey ya Harry, whatcha doing?" he asked. He had just come back from Professor Flitwick's classroom as the tiny man was determined to make something out of Neville no matter the time or cost.

"Just thinking," he replied, taking a sip from a mug. He sounded so sad, she wanted to reach out and hold him. Neville fidgeted. C'mon Neville, get lost, Jessica hissed softly.

"Harry, I know this is none of my business, but how come you're going to the Lovers Ball with Lavender?" he asked. Jessica felt her insides turn to lead. He what?

"Whom else would've I asked?" said Harry, no emotions registering in his face.

"Jessica, maybe?" said Neville. Harry turned a pair of glinting green eyes towards him. Jessica gasped at what she saw. Anger… hate.

"Why would I do that? She means nothing to me," he spat. Neville cowered and that was the last thing Jessica saw. Her eyes blurred with tears and she ran up back to the room, potions homework forgotten. But she only made it to the third floor windowsill before she collapsed in tears. Julianna was wrong. Love isn't a healer, it just makes you hurt even more. Oh Harry, I love you…she waited too long, she had lost him. 

Sometimes it's wrong to walk away, though you think it's over…

Knowing there's so much more to say

Suddenly the moments gone

And all your dreams are upside down

And you just wanna change the way the world goes round…

How long she spent at the windowsill sobbing, she didn't know but by the time she regained enough energy to return to her room, Hermione had fallen fast asleep.

*#*

Next few days passed in a blur. By then, the whole school knew that Harry was taking Lavender to the annual valentine's dance. Hermione was livid at Harry, but the damage had been done. All she could do was offer solace to her thunderstruck roommate as only Hermione knew about the girl's change of heart. As for Jessica, she was nothing more than a zombie. The life in her had gone. Her eyes were gray, her spirit broken. She neither talked nor socialized with anyone. During classes, her glazed eyes would be looking at the back of Harry's head.

Have you ever love and lost somebody

Wish there was a chance to say I'm sorry

Can't you see that's the way I feel about you and me

Have you ever felt your heart was breaking?

Looking down the road you should be taking

I should know, coz I love and lost

The day I let you go….

Meals were no better. She would push her food around, never really tasting it. Hermione would cajole, threaten, sweet talk, and force-feed, but nothing could make Jessica snap out of her haze. Nothing could make her tear her eyes away from Harry. As it was now. She was in the far corner of the common room, her face buried in her transfiguration book, but her eyes were on Harry, laughing at something Lavender had said. Those two had become inseparable since he had asked her. Her vision became blurred as she teared up… again… for the millionth time. She didn't even realize a second person had joined her.

"Hey, you okay?" said the deep male voice. Startled, Jessica dropped her book, but was quickly caught by the strong hands. Jessica's gaze settled on the handsome features of the owner.

"Hi Dean," she said softly, smiling… or at least trying to. She looked back to Harry. Did he just look at her? No, she must have imagined it.

"So whom are you going to the dance with?" he asked. With Harry, she wanted to say, but no matter how many times she said it, or how loud she said it, it would never come true.

"No one," she replied. They were silent for a while, Dean looking thoughtful, Jessica looking… sad.

"I don't have a date too. How about we go together?" he said, rather quickly. Jessica looked at him. Dean was asking her?

"Of course we'll go as friends," he quickly added. NO! Jessica's heart cried. I don't want to go with you! I want to go with Harry!! Jessica don't be unreasonable; don't cut your nose to spite your face. Go with Dean, you might have fun. Unlikely, but at least you tried. It's embarrassing how everyone is giving you pitying looks. But I want to go with Harry!! she objected. But her pride won in the end.

"Okay," she said, and bravely smiled for his benefit.

Harry tore his gaze away from Jessica and Dean and laughed at what Lavender had said. It's only been three days since he had asked her, and he's regretted it already. He couldn't stand her gossiping prattle and her jokes weren't even funny. If he didn't want to get even with Jessica, he wouldn't be near Lavender with a ten meter pole between them. Not that it's working or anything. She doesn't seem to care. She just goes around, emotionless, like the ice queen she is. And now she's chumming up with Dean Thomas. The bastard. I bet their going to the dance together, he thought, bile rising to his throat. If he weren't an excellent chaser and if quidditch season didn't start next week, Harry'd beat the guy up.

"Hahaha, that's funny, Lavender," about as funny as fungus on a log. He couldn't stand it any longer… only two more days till the dance, and then he can rid himself of Lavender. If only he could rid himself of his thoughts of Jessica as easily.

A/N: silly Harry… but perhaps Dean will heal Jessica's broken heart??