Troubled Times
Part 4
By: Silverstar
Yay! The fourth part! Thanks to all who reviewed. I luv you guys for it. ^__^ I have to say I was very happy with your responses.
Disclaimer: I don't own Charmed...*sigh*
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As I sat on my bed, curled up into a ball, I felt despair, hopelessness, and sadness wash over me. I also felt the hatred and anger I had for my sisters grow inside of me...they had ruined everything. Looking up through blurry eyes, I pushed at my sisters to go away, but they held onto me tightly.
"No! Let go!" I sobbed, rushing to get up and run for the door. A moment later I was pulled back as Prue's arms wrapped around me and pulled me next to her on the bed. I wouldn't be able to escape. Looking up, I saw that Prue and Piper still had a few lone tears falling down their cheeks and that they were looking at each other...both were probably wondering what they were going to do with me. Not bothering to wipe the tears from my eyes, I pulled my sleeves back down and then leaned over to set my head on my knees. What was I going to do? Both of my sisters were sitting right there, watching me like a hawk. There was no way that I could get away...They'd take everything Jim sent me...I'm sure they would...But, hey, that's not all of it. Half is still in the bag...under my bed. I had shoved it pretty hard under there, under some blankets and such. Knowing my sisters, they'd probably search my room...I just had to think of a way to get it out before they searched everything. My mind raced with theories on how to get the bag, but mostly what I thought of in those long five minutes was Jim. I'd never tell them about him...they'd never get to him. I wouldn't betray him...and even if my sisters locked me up without any drugs, or fresh air, or beer, or anything...I'd always have him in my heart. Sooner or later, he'd have to come for me...he'd find a way to get in touch. Looking up, I realized that Prue and Piper had left the room, and were standing down the hall whispering quietly. Looking over, I noticed that Prue had taken every single bottle on the bed with her. This was my chance! Reaching under my bed, I pulled out the bag and separated the amount into six different piles. The first pile I hid inside of a sock, the next in the compartment of a purse, the third inside the sheet covering my mattress, the fourth in the bottom of the tissue box, the fifth inside a computer disk holder, and the last in the back of my closet inside the pocket of an old pair of overalls that I had thrown in the back corner of the closet before I had left for New York. All this I had done in the span of two minutes, and when I was done I sat down on my bed with relief. Maybe they wouldn't find all of them. As my breathing slowed I could still hear Piper and Prue down the hall talking quietly...they were probably discussing what they were going to do with me...great. Standing up and wiping the tears off my face, I walked over to my open door and strained to listen.
"How long do you think Prue?" Piper asked.
"Probably the whole time she was here...maybe beforehand too..."
"Then why would she come back home?" Piper asked, and I got a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. This conversation was going to lead to a phone call to Cassie...She'd tell them about Jim...No...
"Piper...it doesn't matter how or why at the moment...we just have to keep her from this stuff," Prue said, lifting the bag of my precious gift from Jim up for her to see.
"I still can't believe..."
"I know, I know," Prue whispered and there was a pause, probably a moment where Prue and Piper had hugged. "First thing's first. We have to call Darryl, see if he can help us. Then, I think we should call Cassie. She probably knows something...We need to help Phoebe...this stuff could be doing some real damage to her." Wait...why was I waiting here listening to their conversation? Closing and locking my door quickly, I pulled out my cell phone and called Matt. He had slipped me his number the night before. I didn't want to call Jim, his shop, or his club...they might get a hold of my phone and trace the call.
"Hello?"
"Matt? It's Phoebe," I said urgently, keeping my voice low, but barely stopping myself from crying.
"Phoebe? What's wrong?" he asked, full attention on me.
"My sisters found the bag," I whispered. "I still have half hidden around my room, but they're going to search it. I won't be able to contact anyone -" *BANG**BANG**BANG*
"Phoebe! Open the door!" Prue shouted from the other side. Oh, great.
"Matt, tell Jim it's a 911. I can't get out...give him my love..." *BANG* Quickly turning off the phone, I threw it on the chair beside my bed as Prue finished picking the lock and barged into the room. I was halfway out the window, but Piper and Prue pulled me back in. "Let go!" I screamed, kicking and struggling as I was pulled back in and the window was shut and locked.
"Phoebe! Phoebe!" Prue shouted at me, but I continued to struggle. If I was going down, I'd go down fighting. After a few minutes I tired, and slowly quieted down. Prue and Piper had held my arms back the whole time, and continued to do so until I stopped moving all together. "Come on," Prue insisted. "You're coming downstairs with us." There was no use in fighting the inevitable, so I let my sisters lead me downstairs and place me on the couch. I silently watched as Prue picked up the phone to call...Darryl...who the hell was he? Piper got on the other line to listen, and I sat there, Prue eyeing me with a "move and die" look.
"Hey, Darryl? It's Prue," Prue stated.
"Piper too," I heard Piper say from the cord phone in the hallway.
"Yeah, we have a favor to ask you..." I tuned out as Prue and Piper talked with this guy...I didn't really have any interest in the matter. I just kept thinking about Jim. I hope he'd get my message... Looking up, I realized that my sisters had hung up the phones and were standing in front of me. I tried to focus on them, but my mind was so hard to control these days.
"Phoebe..." Piper whispered, and I realized that they must have been trying to get my attention for a while. I looked up and over at her, and I saw the tears threatening to overflow from her eyes. Still, I knew my eyes probably scared her more than hers scared me. I could feel the sorrow, anger, and hopelessness emanating from them. I hadn't spoken to my sisters at all...except when I had shouted for them to leave me alone earlier. Looking back down, I decided it would be best if I kept it that way. I didn't speak to my sisters and I didn't resist when they took me upstairs and locked me in Piper's room. I was just so tired...I hadn't eaten in days and all I wanted to do was sleep. I jumped in surprise when Kit jumped on top of me from a chair beside Piper's bed. She must've accidentally got locked in here with me. I gently stroked her soft fur and listened to the sound of her purring.
"Oh, Kit. What am I going to do?" Picking up the little cat, I hugged her closely as I laid down on the bed. I could hear Prue and Piper down the hall searching my room, and only a few moments ago I had heard someone at the door...must be that guy called Darryl. I just hope they didn't bother me for a while...I wanted to be alone. Suddenly, I heard the lock of the door move, and I knew all of my luck had run out. The door slowly swung open and there stood Piper and a tall black strong-looking guy in a suit. He looked at me for a moment...mostly like he was judging me, and then followed Piper into the room, closing the door behind him.
"Phoebe, this is Darryl. He's an Inspector from the Police Station and a friend of ours."
"Hi Phoebe. I just wanted to give you a drug and alcohol test," Darrel said gently...but he was a cop. I don't trust cops. He'll lock me up...
"No...Stay away from me," I seethed, backing away from him until I hit the end of the bed, Kit still in my arms.
"Phoebe, he's not going to hurt you. Darryl promised that he'd help us. He's going to take everything we find in your room away and he's not going to charge you with anything. We're going to keep you safe." I looked at Piper, and then at the cop, but I didn't trust any of them. The only people I could trust were Jim, and myself. After a few minutes I gave up, knowing they'd never leave me alone, and I took Darryl's damn drug test. Of course, I came up positive, but I guess he had to do it as a formality. After we were finished Piper and Darryl left, locking the door behind them. They were probably going to help Prue search my room. Great...a cop in my room...*sigh* The whole time I hadn't let go of Kit, and she had sat contently in my arms...Just looking at her made me think of Katri, then of Cassie, and then of Jim. Prue and Piper were going to call Cassie...I just hope she didn't have any info on Jim that would get him in trouble. I sat up for an hour thinking and praying that things would be alright...I didn't see how they could be, but maybe...I sighed in despair as I rolled over on my side and sat Kit down to pet her. In a few moments, I was asleep. Upon waking I found that it was seven o'clock...I had slept all day. It almost seems like all I do is sleep now days...I smiled at Kit, who was sleeping beside me and bent down to kiss her in the head. Looking over, I saw that the door to Piper's room was unlocked and open. Sighing in relief, I heaved myself off of Piper's bed and made my way to my room. Of course, I didn't like what I found in there. Prue and Piper were both sitting on my bed, and quickly looked up when I walked in. I had already turned around and was heading out of there when I felt someone grab my hand from behind and turn me around...Prue.
"Phoebe, please don't leave. We need to talk," Prue whispered. As weak as I was, I couldn't stop her from leading me over to the bed and sitting me between Piper and herself.
"We talked to Cassie," Piper whispered, and I continued to look down at my lap, my heart pounding. "She told us she had sent you here to protect you...to keep you away from whatever you were taking...and to keep you away from the person who had been supplying it to you." Silence filled the room and I silently thanked my quick head for calling Matt before. Receiving my message, Jim would lay low for a while...he'd be safe.
"Phoebe, is a lousy guy really worth your health...your life?" Prue asked, bringing her hand to my chin and lifting my head up so I was looking at her.
"You...you don't understand," I said bitterly, staring at her with anger.
"What don't I understand?" Prue asked. "Tell me...we can help you Phoebe. We can." I looked at my big sister for a moment, I glimmer of hope growing within me...but in a second it died away, and I lowered my head again.
"No one can help me. Just leave me alone," I whispered. In a few minutes my sisters silently left, closing the door behind them. Going over to lock it, I realized that they had taken the lock out...They'd be able to come in whenever they wanted to 'check' on me...Walking over to my two windows, I gasped when I saw that they were heavily padlocked...There was no way that I'd be able to get out...I was trapped in hell. Sighing to myself, I quickly went around my room to check all of the hiding places. That guy Darryl must be a good cop...the only pile of drugs left were the ones inside of the sock in my underwear drawer. At least I had put one of my needles in with this pile...Not wanting to test my luck, I quickly shoved it all back into the sock, closed the drawer, and went to pick up my phone. There was a blinking light on it...I quickly picked it up to see that I had received an instant message:
Phoebe, it's Matt. I called Jim after you got in touch with me and he said not to worry. He'd lay low for a while. He sends his love and told me to tell you that if you absolutely need to talk to call this number: 435- 7669. It's not safe to contact me anymore, but that line is secure. Don't worry Phoebe, in time Jim'll get you out of this.
My frown turned into a smile as I read Matt's message. He was right...it wasn't safe to call him any longer. Luckily, when I had called him earlier I had slipped his number into my pocket...Prue, Piper, and Darryl didn't have it. Reaching my hand into my pocket, I took out the piece of paper and tore it into tiny pieces. After throwing the microscopic pieces into the trash can, I memorized the number Matt had given me and deleted the message from my phone. After putting the phone down I walked over to sit by my window. Looking out, I smiled at the neighborhood. I had forgotten how peaceful and homely this place was...But even as a kid I felt the need to get out...just as now. Placing my hand on the glass, I watched some of the kids riding their bikes down the sidewalks and the happy families talking over their fences to their neighbors...why couldn't my childhood have been like that? The only family that I had now was Jim...and he was taken away from me. Hearing a noise behind me, I looked around my shoulder to see Piper standing there holding a tray of food...She always brought me meals even though she knew that I never ate them.
"Hey Phoebs...I brought you dinner. You should eat something...you're too thin." I looked again at Piper and the tray of food before turning my attention back to the window. I wish I could get out...I wish I could run away and leave this place behind me...but I couldn't. I'd never get away again. "I'll...I'll leave it here on your desk," Piper said slowly before setting down the tray and leaving the room. Looking over, I saw that she had made me a light sandwich with toasted bread and turkey...she must've known I didn't feel well. Walking over, I picked up the bottled water and took a sip...It tasted so good. A moment later I sat back by my window with my water and continued to look at all the happy people and families in the neighborhood.
The next time I looked at the clock it was twelve. Getting up, I picked up the empty water bottle and the tray of food Piper had brought for me earlier. Quietly, I opened my door and headed downstairs to the kitchen. Once there , I threw away the uneaten sandwich, the water bottle and washed off the plate that the food had been on. Feeling tired, I slowly walked over to sit in a chair at the table. It was actually kind of peaceful down here at night with no one around. I sat there for a while, drinking in the silence and the serenity when I heard a noise to my left. Looking over, I saw Piper near the stove making tea. She hadn't seemed to notice me, but then I hadn't bothered to turn the lights on. Neither had she. She just stood there, waiting for the water to get hot and not moving at all...I watched her for a while, but then got bored and drew my attention to the window. It was dark out, but I liked staring up at the star-filled sky...After a few moments I heard a clunk and looked down to see a mug of tea sitting in front of me...I guess Piper had seen me after all. Looking up at her, I saw her give me a forced smile and then she sat down across from me with her own mug. Picking up the mug, I felt the warmth of the liquid and took a small sip...as the hot tea washed down my throat I felt a feeling of comfort and peace come over me. I took in a deep breath and set down the mug in front of me, still keeping my hands on the hot handle. I looked at Piper for a moment...She was taking a sip of her tea and starring off into space...thinking. I smiled, appreciating the silence, and receded into my own thoughts. What was going to happen to me now? I didn't know...I'm sure my sisters didn't know either. I...I just wanted peace...that's what I wanted. Jim had given me that...he had given me peace. Without him...without the gift and the curse that he had given me...I felt lost and confused. I hardly noticed the few lone tears that fell down my cheeks, and continued to drink the tea that Piper had given to me. We sat in silence drinking our tea for about an hour, and when my mug was empty I finally got pulled out of my thoughts to see Piper looking at me. I looked back at her, staring into her eyes for an answer...why? Why was this happening to me? She just looked at me sadly and then placed her hand on mine in a comforting way. Piper...why did she care so much?
"Piper...thanks," I whispered, and I think my voice and reaction surprised her a little. She stared at me for a second before giving me a genuine smile and squeezing my hand. I glanced at her one last time before putting my mug in the dishwasher and making my way upstairs. Once in my room I shut the door and tumbled into bed. The tea had made me calm and sleepy. The next morning I woke up around eight and looked around. The door to my room was open as well as the curtains on my window, letting the sun in. Someone had been into my room...*sigh* They probably wanted the door open to keep an eye on me...then again, it was probably Prue. Piper seemed pretty understanding. She'd let me have my privacy. Sitting up, I felt a wave of dizziness and quickly lay back down on my pillow.
"Woah..." Closing my eyes, I waited a few minutes before attempting to get up again. This time I sat up more slowly and had no problems. Realizing that I still had my clothes on from yesterday, I grabbed an old pair of jeans and a sweatshirt from my closet, along with two pairs of socks from my drawer, and made my way to the bathroom. It being Monday, Prue was already downstairs reading the morning paper and Piper was making coffee and breakfast. Relieved that the bathroom door still had a lock, I quickly locked it and got into the shower. The cool water felt good and refreshed me somewhat. I got out quickly, but still let the water run while I opened up one of my socks to reveal what I had hidden from the enemy...my gifts from Jim. Smiling, I fumbled with the drugs and quickly took some. I could feel the effects almost immediately, and I sighed in relief. Looking at the watch that I had brought in with me, I figured that my usual time was up, and I shut off the water. Quickly, I got dressed and brushed my teeth. I felt happier already. Gathering up all my supplies, I unlocked the door and headed back to my room. I safely placed the sock back in the drawer and threw my other clothes in the dirty hamper. Looking around, I saw my brush on my desk and picked it up to brush out my hair. Looking out the window, I saw that Prue had left, and I knew it was safe to go downstairs. Everything would be all right...as long as I didn't use up what I had. Matt said that Jim would eventually come for me...or help me out. I just had to hold out until then. I slowly descended into the family room since I heard Piper in the kitchen, and sat down on the couch. Tired, happy, and lazy, I turned on the TV and started flipping channels. Nothing was really on, so I settled on the News, and sat back to watch. Only five minutes later, Piper came in with water, coffee, and some toast. I watched as she set the tray down on the table, took a quick glance at me, and then retreated back to the kitchen. I was sure Prue had told her to keep an eye on me...Looking at the food, I decided I couldn't risk eating it, but grabbed the water. Besides, I felt so good at the moment anyway...I wasn't hungry or anything...I was content. The rest of the day I was happy just lying around the house, taking in the effect of the dosage from earlier that morning. Around eleven I had retreated to my room where I sat in a stupor on my bed, thinking of Jim and using my new high to imagine fantasies with him. Later when Piper came in with lunch I barely noticed her, and ignored her offering of food. I didn't want her, I didn't want Prue, I didn't want food...I just wanted Jim. It wasn't till around nine that night when I lied back and fell into a fitful sleep. Both Prue and Piper had come in to see me and offer me food, but I had ignored them and continued to think about Jim. I thought about what he was doing at an exact moment, and if he was thinking of me. I could practically see his eyes, his smile, his body...With a jolt I woke up around twelve. Whatever dream had awakened me, I knew it must've been bad, for I was shaking and sweating...no, it wasn't a dream. My high was just ending, and I could feel the depression that came with it descend upon me. Bringing my knees up to my chin and holding them with my arms, I gently rocked back and forth and began to cry. Why did I feel this way...I know...I felt this way because deep down I knew that I'd probably never see Jim again...I'd be trapped here for eternity. My life was over, and there was nothing I could do about it. Except...well, I could go out with a bang. Yes, that's right. I just needed more...I needed it all. If it stopped this pain...if it stopped my agony. Slowly, I got up and pulled everything I had hid from my sisters out of my drawer.
"Oh, God...Jim, please understand," I whispered as I made my way back onto my bed and sat down. Pulling up my sleeve, I looked at my arm and then back at the long needle. Yes...he'd understand. There was no way out of this hellhole...I might as well enjoy a few hours of my time here before the end. Taking a deep breath, I shakily opened a bottle and stuck the needle it, taking up all that was in it. Slowly, I placed the needle into my arm and started to push...
TO BE CONTINUED...
... he....he...*grimace* Please don't hate me, but it felt right to end it here. I know some of you may be wondering about Phoebe and her connections and feelings towards her sisters. Sometimes she's happy and wants to believe in them, and other times all she can think about is her psycho boyfriend. The drugs are playing tricks with her mind, making her indecisive and her emotions are on a roller coaster. Please be patient with her. Okays? ^^
Yay! The fourth part! Thanks to all who reviewed. I luv you guys for it. ^__^ I have to say I was very happy with your responses.
Disclaimer: I don't own Charmed...*sigh*
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As I sat on my bed, curled up into a ball, I felt despair, hopelessness, and sadness wash over me. I also felt the hatred and anger I had for my sisters grow inside of me...they had ruined everything. Looking up through blurry eyes, I pushed at my sisters to go away, but they held onto me tightly.
"No! Let go!" I sobbed, rushing to get up and run for the door. A moment later I was pulled back as Prue's arms wrapped around me and pulled me next to her on the bed. I wouldn't be able to escape. Looking up, I saw that Prue and Piper still had a few lone tears falling down their cheeks and that they were looking at each other...both were probably wondering what they were going to do with me. Not bothering to wipe the tears from my eyes, I pulled my sleeves back down and then leaned over to set my head on my knees. What was I going to do? Both of my sisters were sitting right there, watching me like a hawk. There was no way that I could get away...They'd take everything Jim sent me...I'm sure they would...But, hey, that's not all of it. Half is still in the bag...under my bed. I had shoved it pretty hard under there, under some blankets and such. Knowing my sisters, they'd probably search my room...I just had to think of a way to get it out before they searched everything. My mind raced with theories on how to get the bag, but mostly what I thought of in those long five minutes was Jim. I'd never tell them about him...they'd never get to him. I wouldn't betray him...and even if my sisters locked me up without any drugs, or fresh air, or beer, or anything...I'd always have him in my heart. Sooner or later, he'd have to come for me...he'd find a way to get in touch. Looking up, I realized that Prue and Piper had left the room, and were standing down the hall whispering quietly. Looking over, I noticed that Prue had taken every single bottle on the bed with her. This was my chance! Reaching under my bed, I pulled out the bag and separated the amount into six different piles. The first pile I hid inside of a sock, the next in the compartment of a purse, the third inside the sheet covering my mattress, the fourth in the bottom of the tissue box, the fifth inside a computer disk holder, and the last in the back of my closet inside the pocket of an old pair of overalls that I had thrown in the back corner of the closet before I had left for New York. All this I had done in the span of two minutes, and when I was done I sat down on my bed with relief. Maybe they wouldn't find all of them. As my breathing slowed I could still hear Piper and Prue down the hall talking quietly...they were probably discussing what they were going to do with me...great. Standing up and wiping the tears off my face, I walked over to my open door and strained to listen.
"How long do you think Prue?" Piper asked.
"Probably the whole time she was here...maybe beforehand too..."
"Then why would she come back home?" Piper asked, and I got a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. This conversation was going to lead to a phone call to Cassie...She'd tell them about Jim...No...
"Piper...it doesn't matter how or why at the moment...we just have to keep her from this stuff," Prue said, lifting the bag of my precious gift from Jim up for her to see.
"I still can't believe..."
"I know, I know," Prue whispered and there was a pause, probably a moment where Prue and Piper had hugged. "First thing's first. We have to call Darryl, see if he can help us. Then, I think we should call Cassie. She probably knows something...We need to help Phoebe...this stuff could be doing some real damage to her." Wait...why was I waiting here listening to their conversation? Closing and locking my door quickly, I pulled out my cell phone and called Matt. He had slipped me his number the night before. I didn't want to call Jim, his shop, or his club...they might get a hold of my phone and trace the call.
"Hello?"
"Matt? It's Phoebe," I said urgently, keeping my voice low, but barely stopping myself from crying.
"Phoebe? What's wrong?" he asked, full attention on me.
"My sisters found the bag," I whispered. "I still have half hidden around my room, but they're going to search it. I won't be able to contact anyone -" *BANG**BANG**BANG*
"Phoebe! Open the door!" Prue shouted from the other side. Oh, great.
"Matt, tell Jim it's a 911. I can't get out...give him my love..." *BANG* Quickly turning off the phone, I threw it on the chair beside my bed as Prue finished picking the lock and barged into the room. I was halfway out the window, but Piper and Prue pulled me back in. "Let go!" I screamed, kicking and struggling as I was pulled back in and the window was shut and locked.
"Phoebe! Phoebe!" Prue shouted at me, but I continued to struggle. If I was going down, I'd go down fighting. After a few minutes I tired, and slowly quieted down. Prue and Piper had held my arms back the whole time, and continued to do so until I stopped moving all together. "Come on," Prue insisted. "You're coming downstairs with us." There was no use in fighting the inevitable, so I let my sisters lead me downstairs and place me on the couch. I silently watched as Prue picked up the phone to call...Darryl...who the hell was he? Piper got on the other line to listen, and I sat there, Prue eyeing me with a "move and die" look.
"Hey, Darryl? It's Prue," Prue stated.
"Piper too," I heard Piper say from the cord phone in the hallway.
"Yeah, we have a favor to ask you..." I tuned out as Prue and Piper talked with this guy...I didn't really have any interest in the matter. I just kept thinking about Jim. I hope he'd get my message... Looking up, I realized that my sisters had hung up the phones and were standing in front of me. I tried to focus on them, but my mind was so hard to control these days.
"Phoebe..." Piper whispered, and I realized that they must have been trying to get my attention for a while. I looked up and over at her, and I saw the tears threatening to overflow from her eyes. Still, I knew my eyes probably scared her more than hers scared me. I could feel the sorrow, anger, and hopelessness emanating from them. I hadn't spoken to my sisters at all...except when I had shouted for them to leave me alone earlier. Looking back down, I decided it would be best if I kept it that way. I didn't speak to my sisters and I didn't resist when they took me upstairs and locked me in Piper's room. I was just so tired...I hadn't eaten in days and all I wanted to do was sleep. I jumped in surprise when Kit jumped on top of me from a chair beside Piper's bed. She must've accidentally got locked in here with me. I gently stroked her soft fur and listened to the sound of her purring.
"Oh, Kit. What am I going to do?" Picking up the little cat, I hugged her closely as I laid down on the bed. I could hear Prue and Piper down the hall searching my room, and only a few moments ago I had heard someone at the door...must be that guy called Darryl. I just hope they didn't bother me for a while...I wanted to be alone. Suddenly, I heard the lock of the door move, and I knew all of my luck had run out. The door slowly swung open and there stood Piper and a tall black strong-looking guy in a suit. He looked at me for a moment...mostly like he was judging me, and then followed Piper into the room, closing the door behind him.
"Phoebe, this is Darryl. He's an Inspector from the Police Station and a friend of ours."
"Hi Phoebe. I just wanted to give you a drug and alcohol test," Darrel said gently...but he was a cop. I don't trust cops. He'll lock me up...
"No...Stay away from me," I seethed, backing away from him until I hit the end of the bed, Kit still in my arms.
"Phoebe, he's not going to hurt you. Darryl promised that he'd help us. He's going to take everything we find in your room away and he's not going to charge you with anything. We're going to keep you safe." I looked at Piper, and then at the cop, but I didn't trust any of them. The only people I could trust were Jim, and myself. After a few minutes I gave up, knowing they'd never leave me alone, and I took Darryl's damn drug test. Of course, I came up positive, but I guess he had to do it as a formality. After we were finished Piper and Darryl left, locking the door behind them. They were probably going to help Prue search my room. Great...a cop in my room...*sigh* The whole time I hadn't let go of Kit, and she had sat contently in my arms...Just looking at her made me think of Katri, then of Cassie, and then of Jim. Prue and Piper were going to call Cassie...I just hope she didn't have any info on Jim that would get him in trouble. I sat up for an hour thinking and praying that things would be alright...I didn't see how they could be, but maybe...I sighed in despair as I rolled over on my side and sat Kit down to pet her. In a few moments, I was asleep. Upon waking I found that it was seven o'clock...I had slept all day. It almost seems like all I do is sleep now days...I smiled at Kit, who was sleeping beside me and bent down to kiss her in the head. Looking over, I saw that the door to Piper's room was unlocked and open. Sighing in relief, I heaved myself off of Piper's bed and made my way to my room. Of course, I didn't like what I found in there. Prue and Piper were both sitting on my bed, and quickly looked up when I walked in. I had already turned around and was heading out of there when I felt someone grab my hand from behind and turn me around...Prue.
"Phoebe, please don't leave. We need to talk," Prue whispered. As weak as I was, I couldn't stop her from leading me over to the bed and sitting me between Piper and herself.
"We talked to Cassie," Piper whispered, and I continued to look down at my lap, my heart pounding. "She told us she had sent you here to protect you...to keep you away from whatever you were taking...and to keep you away from the person who had been supplying it to you." Silence filled the room and I silently thanked my quick head for calling Matt before. Receiving my message, Jim would lay low for a while...he'd be safe.
"Phoebe, is a lousy guy really worth your health...your life?" Prue asked, bringing her hand to my chin and lifting my head up so I was looking at her.
"You...you don't understand," I said bitterly, staring at her with anger.
"What don't I understand?" Prue asked. "Tell me...we can help you Phoebe. We can." I looked at my big sister for a moment, I glimmer of hope growing within me...but in a second it died away, and I lowered my head again.
"No one can help me. Just leave me alone," I whispered. In a few minutes my sisters silently left, closing the door behind them. Going over to lock it, I realized that they had taken the lock out...They'd be able to come in whenever they wanted to 'check' on me...Walking over to my two windows, I gasped when I saw that they were heavily padlocked...There was no way that I'd be able to get out...I was trapped in hell. Sighing to myself, I quickly went around my room to check all of the hiding places. That guy Darryl must be a good cop...the only pile of drugs left were the ones inside of the sock in my underwear drawer. At least I had put one of my needles in with this pile...Not wanting to test my luck, I quickly shoved it all back into the sock, closed the drawer, and went to pick up my phone. There was a blinking light on it...I quickly picked it up to see that I had received an instant message:
Phoebe, it's Matt. I called Jim after you got in touch with me and he said not to worry. He'd lay low for a while. He sends his love and told me to tell you that if you absolutely need to talk to call this number: 435- 7669. It's not safe to contact me anymore, but that line is secure. Don't worry Phoebe, in time Jim'll get you out of this.
My frown turned into a smile as I read Matt's message. He was right...it wasn't safe to call him any longer. Luckily, when I had called him earlier I had slipped his number into my pocket...Prue, Piper, and Darryl didn't have it. Reaching my hand into my pocket, I took out the piece of paper and tore it into tiny pieces. After throwing the microscopic pieces into the trash can, I memorized the number Matt had given me and deleted the message from my phone. After putting the phone down I walked over to sit by my window. Looking out, I smiled at the neighborhood. I had forgotten how peaceful and homely this place was...But even as a kid I felt the need to get out...just as now. Placing my hand on the glass, I watched some of the kids riding their bikes down the sidewalks and the happy families talking over their fences to their neighbors...why couldn't my childhood have been like that? The only family that I had now was Jim...and he was taken away from me. Hearing a noise behind me, I looked around my shoulder to see Piper standing there holding a tray of food...She always brought me meals even though she knew that I never ate them.
"Hey Phoebs...I brought you dinner. You should eat something...you're too thin." I looked again at Piper and the tray of food before turning my attention back to the window. I wish I could get out...I wish I could run away and leave this place behind me...but I couldn't. I'd never get away again. "I'll...I'll leave it here on your desk," Piper said slowly before setting down the tray and leaving the room. Looking over, I saw that she had made me a light sandwich with toasted bread and turkey...she must've known I didn't feel well. Walking over, I picked up the bottled water and took a sip...It tasted so good. A moment later I sat back by my window with my water and continued to look at all the happy people and families in the neighborhood.
The next time I looked at the clock it was twelve. Getting up, I picked up the empty water bottle and the tray of food Piper had brought for me earlier. Quietly, I opened my door and headed downstairs to the kitchen. Once there , I threw away the uneaten sandwich, the water bottle and washed off the plate that the food had been on. Feeling tired, I slowly walked over to sit in a chair at the table. It was actually kind of peaceful down here at night with no one around. I sat there for a while, drinking in the silence and the serenity when I heard a noise to my left. Looking over, I saw Piper near the stove making tea. She hadn't seemed to notice me, but then I hadn't bothered to turn the lights on. Neither had she. She just stood there, waiting for the water to get hot and not moving at all...I watched her for a while, but then got bored and drew my attention to the window. It was dark out, but I liked staring up at the star-filled sky...After a few moments I heard a clunk and looked down to see a mug of tea sitting in front of me...I guess Piper had seen me after all. Looking up at her, I saw her give me a forced smile and then she sat down across from me with her own mug. Picking up the mug, I felt the warmth of the liquid and took a small sip...as the hot tea washed down my throat I felt a feeling of comfort and peace come over me. I took in a deep breath and set down the mug in front of me, still keeping my hands on the hot handle. I looked at Piper for a moment...She was taking a sip of her tea and starring off into space...thinking. I smiled, appreciating the silence, and receded into my own thoughts. What was going to happen to me now? I didn't know...I'm sure my sisters didn't know either. I...I just wanted peace...that's what I wanted. Jim had given me that...he had given me peace. Without him...without the gift and the curse that he had given me...I felt lost and confused. I hardly noticed the few lone tears that fell down my cheeks, and continued to drink the tea that Piper had given to me. We sat in silence drinking our tea for about an hour, and when my mug was empty I finally got pulled out of my thoughts to see Piper looking at me. I looked back at her, staring into her eyes for an answer...why? Why was this happening to me? She just looked at me sadly and then placed her hand on mine in a comforting way. Piper...why did she care so much?
"Piper...thanks," I whispered, and I think my voice and reaction surprised her a little. She stared at me for a second before giving me a genuine smile and squeezing my hand. I glanced at her one last time before putting my mug in the dishwasher and making my way upstairs. Once in my room I shut the door and tumbled into bed. The tea had made me calm and sleepy. The next morning I woke up around eight and looked around. The door to my room was open as well as the curtains on my window, letting the sun in. Someone had been into my room...*sigh* They probably wanted the door open to keep an eye on me...then again, it was probably Prue. Piper seemed pretty understanding. She'd let me have my privacy. Sitting up, I felt a wave of dizziness and quickly lay back down on my pillow.
"Woah..." Closing my eyes, I waited a few minutes before attempting to get up again. This time I sat up more slowly and had no problems. Realizing that I still had my clothes on from yesterday, I grabbed an old pair of jeans and a sweatshirt from my closet, along with two pairs of socks from my drawer, and made my way to the bathroom. It being Monday, Prue was already downstairs reading the morning paper and Piper was making coffee and breakfast. Relieved that the bathroom door still had a lock, I quickly locked it and got into the shower. The cool water felt good and refreshed me somewhat. I got out quickly, but still let the water run while I opened up one of my socks to reveal what I had hidden from the enemy...my gifts from Jim. Smiling, I fumbled with the drugs and quickly took some. I could feel the effects almost immediately, and I sighed in relief. Looking at the watch that I had brought in with me, I figured that my usual time was up, and I shut off the water. Quickly, I got dressed and brushed my teeth. I felt happier already. Gathering up all my supplies, I unlocked the door and headed back to my room. I safely placed the sock back in the drawer and threw my other clothes in the dirty hamper. Looking around, I saw my brush on my desk and picked it up to brush out my hair. Looking out the window, I saw that Prue had left, and I knew it was safe to go downstairs. Everything would be all right...as long as I didn't use up what I had. Matt said that Jim would eventually come for me...or help me out. I just had to hold out until then. I slowly descended into the family room since I heard Piper in the kitchen, and sat down on the couch. Tired, happy, and lazy, I turned on the TV and started flipping channels. Nothing was really on, so I settled on the News, and sat back to watch. Only five minutes later, Piper came in with water, coffee, and some toast. I watched as she set the tray down on the table, took a quick glance at me, and then retreated back to the kitchen. I was sure Prue had told her to keep an eye on me...Looking at the food, I decided I couldn't risk eating it, but grabbed the water. Besides, I felt so good at the moment anyway...I wasn't hungry or anything...I was content. The rest of the day I was happy just lying around the house, taking in the effect of the dosage from earlier that morning. Around eleven I had retreated to my room where I sat in a stupor on my bed, thinking of Jim and using my new high to imagine fantasies with him. Later when Piper came in with lunch I barely noticed her, and ignored her offering of food. I didn't want her, I didn't want Prue, I didn't want food...I just wanted Jim. It wasn't till around nine that night when I lied back and fell into a fitful sleep. Both Prue and Piper had come in to see me and offer me food, but I had ignored them and continued to think about Jim. I thought about what he was doing at an exact moment, and if he was thinking of me. I could practically see his eyes, his smile, his body...With a jolt I woke up around twelve. Whatever dream had awakened me, I knew it must've been bad, for I was shaking and sweating...no, it wasn't a dream. My high was just ending, and I could feel the depression that came with it descend upon me. Bringing my knees up to my chin and holding them with my arms, I gently rocked back and forth and began to cry. Why did I feel this way...I know...I felt this way because deep down I knew that I'd probably never see Jim again...I'd be trapped here for eternity. My life was over, and there was nothing I could do about it. Except...well, I could go out with a bang. Yes, that's right. I just needed more...I needed it all. If it stopped this pain...if it stopped my agony. Slowly, I got up and pulled everything I had hid from my sisters out of my drawer.
"Oh, God...Jim, please understand," I whispered as I made my way back onto my bed and sat down. Pulling up my sleeve, I looked at my arm and then back at the long needle. Yes...he'd understand. There was no way out of this hellhole...I might as well enjoy a few hours of my time here before the end. Taking a deep breath, I shakily opened a bottle and stuck the needle it, taking up all that was in it. Slowly, I placed the needle into my arm and started to push...
TO BE CONTINUED...
... he....he...*grimace* Please don't hate me, but it felt right to end it here. I know some of you may be wondering about Phoebe and her connections and feelings towards her sisters. Sometimes she's happy and wants to believe in them, and other times all she can think about is her psycho boyfriend. The drugs are playing tricks with her mind, making her indecisive and her emotions are on a roller coaster. Please be patient with her. Okays? ^^