Chp19 A Kiss Farewell
Yami removed his eyes from the mystery card and looked straight into Seto's eyes. His blazing crimson's cut at Seto's soul, as his smile began to fade. "It would seem as though the card I have drawn is……."
Suddenly a glazed look took over Yami's eyes as he was stopped in mid sentence. Seto stared at Yami with bated breath as he waited for the fateful card to be revealed. However after a few moments of heart stopping silence and agonizing anticipation, Seto could take it no loner.
'What the Hell is he doing!?! Why is he just standing there staring into space!?' Seto was now furious as his last ounce of patience finally disappeared. As Seto began to contemplate the best method to get Yami's attention, Seto noticed that the fire in Yami's eyes had suddenly disappeared. It was as if all life had vanished from within him and now the only thing left was a hollow soulless body. Now this wasn't the first time that Seto had seen Yami or Yugi act in such a manner. Often times while watching Yami and Yugi duel, Seto had noticed this strange behavior and wondered what exactly the two of them were doing.
Finally just as Seto was about to jump Yami, in order to knock him back to reality, Yami blinked, and all life returned to his eyes. Seto was relieved and also slightly disappointed, mainly because he wanted an excuse to jump Yami, as he quickly noticed the transformation from one zoned out looking Yami to one slightly disturbed and depressed looking rival. After his little episode something about Yami had definitely changed. However at this point Seto could careless. Now he could no longer take the suspense, as the identity of Yami's mystery card clouded his mind.
"Well Yami, tell me what the Damn card is already!" growled Seto as he tried his best to restrain his anger.
Still a bit shaken from what ever had interrupted him before, Yami didn't even notice Kaiba's outraged command, as he seemed to be thinking something over in his head. Finally Yami decided to delay the moment no longer as he finally spoke up.
"The card that I have drawn………is not the card I need to beat you. I'm sorry to say this, but…….I have lost."
Seto felt as though his heart would stop as the world began to move in slow motion. He watched as Yami's mouth began to move, however he was unable to hear a word that was spoken and yet somehow three out of the many words that Yami had said had somehow managed to break their way through Seto's daze. "I have lost."
Seto could hardly believe it. He had finally heard the words, which he had never thought he would hear outside of his own dreams and fantasies. It was almost too much for Seto to take in. After all the defeats and all the humiliation that Seto had been through, the time that it had mattered the most, Seto had finally won. He had finally beaten Yami. Fate had chosen Seto this day, and now he knew for sure he and Anzu were meant to be.
Seto could hardly contain himself as a full realization of what had just happened finally hit him. However to his own distress, this victory did not feel at all the way he had imagined it would. For years he had had dreamed of this moment and now that it was finally here he didn't feel at all the way he had expected.
A part of him wanted nothing more than to jump for joy and rub his victory in Yami's face. Now it was finally his turn to let Yami realize the true depths of defeat and humiliation. He had finally triumphed and yet rather than feel overwhelmed with pride and conceit, he felt empty, incomplete, and slightly, well…….unsatisfied.
What was this feeling that had taken over his usual cocky nature? Was this guilt? 'But why? Why of all times would I feel this way. This is my day of glory so why do I feel so miserable?' It was then Seto finally realized a harsh reality of life that he would have been happy to remain ignorant of, humility.
Sure he was empathetic towards Yami. He had felt the pains of defeat several times from his own point of view and now that he was no longer on the receiving end he finally realized that winning could be just as hard as losing. Especially when it was something as important as this. He also felt empathy towards Yami because he realized just how it was he would have felt had he have been the loser of this duel. "Damn you Anzu," muttered Seto under his breath. "I never would have felt like this if not for you turning me soft!"
Now Seto was torn between his desire to gloat and his feelings of guilt towards Yami's loss. "Yami I-"
"Kaiba what is wrong with you!?! If you are going to just sit there looking dumbfounded then I will be forced to challenge you to rematch and snatch away this short victory from you." Snapped Yami as a familiar gleam filled his eyes.
"Well aren't you the cocky one," smirked Seto.
"Tch, look who's talking." smiled Yami back mischievously.
"Well then I guess I shouldn't waste anymore of my time with you!" retaliated Seto as he turned to leave. However, just before he could make his exit Yami and Seto's eyes met. It was then that both teens came under a mutual understanding. Now Seto understood why Yami had never held his victories over his face before.
Yami watched as his rival took off in the direction that Anzu had ran. As he silently contemplated on what had just happened, Yami suddenly realized that he had never given the card he had drawn back to Kaiba. Kaiba had been so excited that he failed to even care what Yami had drawn. "I knew he would do that," smiled Yami as he stared down at the tiny card. The small white creature's icy blue eyes pierced at Yami soul as he realized the remarkable resemblance between master and card. "It's no wonder you're his most faithful card." Smiled Yami. "Oh well, I guess I'll have to return this to him later………"
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Seto let out a defeated sigh as he entered through the dark dusky doorway of his mansion. He had searched for hours looking for Anzu. After he had separated from Yami, the only thing he had on his mind was to find Anzu and tell her exactly how he felt. Everything within him was now fueled by his emotions. It was a feeling that Seto had never felt before. However after hours had passed, and he had still failed to find her, Seto's energy began to die down. Now the only thing he felt was fatigue, remorse, and a slight pang of defeat.
Seto made his way through the shadows of his house as he decided to take out his depression with a little work. He quietly slipped pass Mokuba's room in a attempt to not wake him, but quickly retracted the idea when he peeked into his room and saw that Mokuba's head had become glued to his computer screen, and a joystick had become permanently attached to his hand. 'He'll be on that game for hours.' Sighed Seto as he couldn't find it in him to make Mokuba go to bed.
Seto sat in front of his laptop, and began to work. He decided the best thing to do was to just forget about his problems for now, and start working on things that were more constructive. Lately he had been neglecting his work way too much, and now he feared his business had greatly suffered due to his own personal issues.
As he continued to type away (with his one hand, because he's just that damn good), Seto felt a part of him go numb. For some reason he just couldn't concentrate. Now this wasn't normally like him. Usually he would get so consumed by his work, he didn't have time to think about other things. Things such as fatigue, regret, and……lonliness. However before Seto could continue to dwell on these thoughts a loud noise sounded from his computer, signifying that he couldn't continue his work without the proper disk.
Seto rummaged through his papers and desk as he searched for the disk frantically. Suddenly his frustrations began to rise as he realized it was nowhere in sight and he had no clue where it could have gotten to. "Dammit! Where did I put it?" Seto shouted as he knocked a pile of papers off his desk. Finally he started to search all the drawers in his desk.
Sadly, to Seto's avail he was still unable to locate the disk as his patience began to wear thin. However just before he was about to snap, something at the back of his bottom drawer caught his attention. "This?" he murmured. Seto couldn't believe his eyes as he held the small object to his face. "I thought a threw away this sorry piece of failure."
As Seto further examined the object, he noticed a piece of it had been cracked along the front edges. "Oh great, now not only does the stupid thing not work, it's also broken!" However despite his better judgment Seto put the tiny contraption to his face anyways and looked inside it. "What the….." he gasped silently as he could hardly believe what he was seeing.
After Seto finally tore his eyes away from the object, something inside of him was shaken as he got up from his desk and left. "That's it! I have to find Anzu right now!"
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Yami yawned loudly as he made his way back to the Kame Game Shop. It had been a long night, and the only thing he was looking forward to was a nice long rest. Now not only was his body tired, so was his mind. He had been thinking about a lot of things ever since he and Kaiba had gone their separate ways. First of all he had thought about why he had did what he did, and finally he had thought about what he needed to tell Anzu. Now he knew it was very important that they talked and finally ended their problem.
However little to Yami's knowledge fate was conceiving the same thoughts as Yami ran into the last person he had expected to see that night. "Anzu?" he gasped aloud.
Upon hearing Yami's voice Anzu turned and their eyes met. Anzu began to panic as she contemplated on what to do. She had hoped that she would never have to see Yami or Seto again. That way it would be easier for her to forget about them both, but she knew deep in her heart that, that would be impossible. Finally Anzu thought about running away, but as she continued to stare deep into Yami's desperate eyes she couldn't bring herself to do it. She had been running away for too long, and now she realized that it was no longer the solution to her problems.
"Anzu we need to talk." Pleaded Yami as he made his way towards her. Yami was almost afraid that Anzu would take off running again as he walked towards her cautiously.
"You're right Yami, we do," answered Anzu as she gave no signs of flight. She knew that Yami deserved this much if not more.
Yami was relieved as he chose his words carefully. "Anzu I've thought a lot about what you said and I've come under the conclusion that you're absolutely right! You don't deserve to be with either of us! Not as long as you're in love with us both."
"What?" chocked Anzu as she was surprised by Yami's harsh words.
"I mean it's just not fair to either of us if you can only love us halfheartedly. That's why I think you should choose one of us or don't to be with either of us at all! That would just be selfish." Continued Yami as a small smile begin to form on his lips.
"What are you talking about Yami?" retorted Anzu in a slightly frustrated tone. "I know that already. That's why I decided not to be with either of you! That's what I told you first!"
Now Anzu was even angrier as she noticed the amused look on Yami's face. Did he think this was funny? "I just couldn't choose which one of you I cared about the most. There are so many different reasons why I love you both. Some reasons are the same but most reasons are different. You Yami I fell in love with, because your so kind, caring, mysterious, selfless, strong willed and daring and Seto because he's so determined, strong minded, tenacious, bold, intricate, impulsive, and something else that I still haven't quite figured out, but have also come to love. I fell in love with both of you for different reasons. That's why I didn't know who to choose. So that's why I decided not to choose at all."
"Well that's not fair either! I didn't realize how selfish you could be Anzu." Smiled Yami strangely.
"What are you saying? I don't understand," snapped Anzu.
"So since you can't decide who you should be with, then neither one of us gets to be with you? Do you really think that's fair to either Seto or me? Did you even stop to think about how we would feel about your decision? Now not only do you get no one, we get no one either!" Anzu felt as though her heart would crumble as she listened to Yami's words. She thought what she had done, was for the best. She thought it was the only fair thing to do for Seto and Yami after hurting them both so much, but now she realized she was wrong. Now she realized she had only hurt them worse.
"Then what should I do?" she asked solemnly.
"Well isn't it obvious? You should choose one of us. That's why I'm here to help you make the right choice." Anzu stared up at Yami expecting to see a frustrated or angry face, however she was shocked by Yami's questionably calm smile.
"I think the person you should be with, No the person I know is right for you is, Seto."
"Yami!?!" questioned Anzu as she was taken by surprise again.
"Anzu you'll have to excuse what I said to you before. I really don't think that you're a selfish person. I know you were only trying to do what you thought was best. I just wanted to help you realize my point." Smiled Yami reassuringly.
"You see, I've been thinking a lot and I've come to realize there are two reasons why we shouldn't be together. The first reason I hope I have already made clear to you. That being, that it isn't fair for two people to be together if one of the people in that relationship is only in love halfheartedly. After spending so much of my time with Yugi and you, and everybody else, I've come to realize a lot of things I never knew before, and one of those things is what it really means to be in love with someone." Anzu grew silent as she listened to Yami in a daze.
Yami let out a reflective sigh as he continued on. "There are so many different ways that you can love a person, and over the course of the years I have come to love you in two different ways. First of all I love you as a friend and secondly I've come to love you as a woman. As a friend my heart is completely yours, but on the other level, right now I believe I can only love you halfheartedly."
"You see right now I realize there is someone else who needs me more than you do. However, I got so caught up in my relationship with you, that I failed to realize how much that person is hurting now. If you and I were to get together it would only hurt that person even more, and as long as this fact is true I could never be completely happy being with you. Now this person will never straight out tell me this, out of fear of hurting us both," Yami brought his hand up to his chest suggestively and stared at the ground thoughtfully, "but we are connected in such a way that I felt the pain and fear of lose here in my heart."
"At first I wasn't sure why, but after I thought about it, I finally realized the reason I would feel unhappy. You see I'm also in love with this person. Not in the same way that I love you, but it is definitely something that goes beyond a friendship type love. So what I'm saying Anzu, is as long as my heart belongs to this person, and that person is unhappy seeing us together, then I could never love you wholeheartedly." Anzu continued to stare at Yami as she realized whom he was talking about. Now she realized how much Yami understood her feelings towards Seto.
"You see I don't think it would be fair to you if I couldn't give you my whole heart. I feel the same way as you. You yourself taught me that love isn't just some one-sided thing. Both people should love each other sincerely and completely. That is why I feel it would be better for the both of us if we weren't together." Anzu was still silent as she was unable to find her voice. However even if she was able to she couldn't think of anything to say. The only thing she could think about now, were Yami's words.
"Now the other reason why I feel you should be with Kaiba is because……well he needs you more. You know that thing you said you loved about Kaiba but you weren't quite sure what it was. Well I think I have an idea." Suddenly Anzu's attention was once again completely focused on Yami's as she could hardly believe Kaiba would be one of Yami's reasons for not being with her.
"All of Kaiba's life he has felt that he only needed to depend on himself and no one else. I'm not sure the reason why, but I figure he's been let down a lot during his life. That is the reason why he has shut himself off from the world. However, somewhere along the way he opened up his heart to you. Now I'm not sure the reason why, but once Kaiba did, he started to realize how much he needed people in his life. How much he needed you. The reason why I know this is because I have seen a look in his eyes that I thought I would never see from him. There is a passion in them, as if something deep inside of him has finally been reawakened." Yami narrowed his eyes towards the ground as if he were struggling to speak.
"However Kaiba still has a long way to go before he can truly learn what it means to live again. Yugi has tried so hard to show him this, and has succeeded to a point, however, he can only do so much." Finally Yami tore his gaze from the ground and looked Anzu straight in the eyes. "Now I believe you are the only person that can bring Seto back to life."
"I can understand completely what he is going through. You see most of my life my heart was lost in darkness. That is until Yugi rescued me. However even though I was freed from those shadows that would have swallowed up my very soul, I still would have been lost if not for Yugi, and you, and everyone else. Somehow you all became the light of my life, the lamp to my feet. You all have guided me and continue to guide me even now, and for that I could never be more grateful." Yami quietly chuckled to himself as he realized the more that he talked the more he was able to understand things.
"I know sometimes it seems as though I always have the upper hand or am a really strong willed person, but in truth I an only strong because you all our my strength, and that it why I have tried my hardiest to help you all the best that I can. I feel it is the best use to the skills that I have been blessed with." As Anzu continued to hang onto Yami's every word, his sudden movements startled her as he pulled a familiar object from his side pocket.
"And whether or not you and I are together, I know we will always be friends." Yami smiled as he chained the small blue necklace back around Anzu's neck. "That I know I can always rely on. So no matter how many times I get lost Yugi or Jonouchi or Honda or even you will always be there to help me find my way."
"However I've come to realize that not everyone one is as lucky as I am. Yugi may have shown Kaiba the path to light, but Kaiba has no one to guide him. That is until you came into his life. I can see it in his eyes. He needs you Anzu. You are his light now, and I've come to realize that in this world there can be no darkness without any light. That is why you two belong together. You two can guide each other." Now Anzu was on the verge of tears as she wanted to badly to say something, but realized she still had nothing to say.
"I know it will be hard for the both of us to just denounce our feelings for each other so idly, but I think both of us have the strength of heart to do it. That's one thing about you that I could always rely on, your strength of heart. Its one thing I admit I could never beat you at, and as long as you can do this, I know I can to. So please let us both focus on the people who really need us the most. I know once you've come to realize the truth of my words then we can all be truly happy." Yami smiled warmly as he wiped away a stray tear from Anzu's cheek. He knew he meant everything that he was saying, and yet he also realized that saying what should be done was always easier than actually doing it.
"I will always treasure what we had, but I want you to be happy Anzu. However don't think of this as an ending, think of this as a new beginning, for us both." That had about done it. Anzu could take any more as she fell into Yami's arms and burst into tears.
"Oh Yami," she sobbed as she held onto him tightly. Anzu realized that everything he had said was true and yet a part of her just couldn't let go of him.
"It's okay Anzu." Cooed Yami softly as he welcomed Anzu's embrace with his own. "Cry as much as you want. I'm here for you. I will always be here for you."
"I know that Yami, but…" Anzu's words got lost as she chocked on a few tears.
As Anzu continued to cry into Yami's chest, a realization of Yami's words suddenly hit her. She was finally able to look past everything and realize the truth behind his words and her own feelings. Now she realized that everything he said was true. Now she knew she would truly be able to let go of Yami and completely give her heart to Kaiba. With each tear that she cried the part of her that loved Yami romantically began to fade. She knew that she would always love Yami, but now she realized it was time for her to let him go, and the idea of that, losing what they had only willed her to cry even more.
Finally as Anzu's sobs died down, she was shocked back into reality as something wet fell to her face. Anzu looked up and was surprised by what she saw. Although Yami's face was covered with a peaceful smile it was also flooded with tears. "I guess this is goodbye," she whispered as she brought her hand to his face and let a tear trickle down her arm.
'But there's one thing you still owe me, and one thing I owe you.' Anzu stared into Yami's memorizing crimsons as she inched her face towards his. Suddenly for one split moment in time their souls were connected as Anzu's eyes fell shut and their lips met.
Anzu felt as though she were in heaven as she felt Yami's spirit run through her veins. It was a fire that she had never felt before. Finally the secret behind what fueled Yami's fiery crimsons flowed through her as she lost herself in his kiss.
His kiss was not at all like Seto's. It was much less demanding and fierce, and yet just as powerful and much more serene. It wasn't any better, but it wasn't any worse. It was just different. Just like the different reasons why Anzu loved them both.
As Anzu attempted to breath through their kiss in order to elongate the moment, Yami took advantage of the situation as he claimed her mouth. With Seto Anzu always felt the need to test and tease him, but with Yami she was somehow driven to surrender to him instantly as she did not challenge him at all. Anzu let out a soft moan from the back of her throat as she could hardly handle the flood of emotions that had taken over her.
Anzu felt their souls intertwine as she finally realized what it was Yugi felt while sharing a body and soul with Yami. Unable to bring herself to break their kiss Anzu leaned on Yami for support as she suddenly felt her head go light.
Yami felt as though he would die from pure ecstasy as he savored Anzu's very being. Her scent, her touch, the way that her hair tickled his neck was almost enough to drive him to the edge. However despite how much he would regret it Yami broke their kiss as he realized that this was their final farewell.
As their kiss finally ended so did the last piece of whatever they had once shared. Both teens realized this as they stared into each other's eyes sadly, and hugged for one last time. "Goodbye Anzu, I will never forget this moment, and thank you for always being you."
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Seto let out another exasperated sigh as he circled the block that Anzu lived at one more time. He had been so determined to see her, but finally decided to come to grips with the fact that all that he had bottled up inside him, would just have to stay bottled until tomorrow. It was so late in the night that Anzu was probably already home, and Seto thought it best to not bother her now for fear of waking her and further angering her father who was already not too fond of him.
"Driver just take me home," he muttered tiredly as he leaned against the window in defeat. However his eyes suddenly widened as he noticed two figures standing in the middle of the street.
"What the Hell!?!" shouted Seto angrily as he realized what he had just seen. "That was Yami and Anzu…….Kissing!"
To be continued
Quote of the Week: "Time is what keeps everything from happening at once."
Heh-Heh, talk about situational irony huh? Wasn't it not to long ago that Yami was in Seto's shoes? Well let's see how much differently Kaiba handles this situation. Uh huh, and there's a big difference between Yami and Seto.
Oh and as for the card. Well I guess you all sort of called that one…er but from the oppisite direction. No matter who would have won vote wise, Yami would have always drawn that card. That was always my intention. I mean Kaiba drew Yami's most trusted card, and Yami drew Kaiba's. These are the cards that basically symbolize the 2 characters. Especially Kaiba (white coat, blue eyes!!)!! I know he could have drew Obelisk, but that card is more borrowed then a part of him, and eventually he will lose it. And why did Yami draw it even though he lost vote wise…well because he's the King of Games, he never loses, and I wasn't about to change that now! Oh and for those of you who still don't know which card I'm talking about…come on, don't be slow! Fine then I'll tell you in the next chapter then. You'll just have to wait again for not being a big enough Yugioh fanatic to figure it out (heh, hope I didn't offend anyone ::sweat drop::).
Aww and wasn't that just so Kawaii? Come on I know even you S/A fans had to think that was a little sweet. I felt so sorry for Yami, but oh well it's not like they won't still be friends. I also have to admit that finding a resolution between Yami and Anzu's relationship was a lot less challenging than it would have been had Seto lost. As I mentioned before, those two guys are so different, and the results might not have been quite so cute. Seto can be a little vindictive……then again Manga Yami freaks me out even more (he looks all friggin psycho and he even kills people!).
I also hope I didn't discourage you YY/A fans from reading this fic. I went strictly by the votes and well the S/A fans were a little overwhelming. I know you guys want to kill me and stuff, but if you've read this far you mine as well go all the way, right? I promise there will be a lot of Yami to come in the last two chapters, and don't you guys want to see what happens after Yami and Anzu's kiss? Uhhhh ::sweat drop:: please stop glaring at me like that. It's kind of scary, eh heh. Yami still has Yugi.
Oh and for those of you who were wondering. Yes Yami was talking about Yugi, and no I'm not a yaoi writer. I don't mind reading the stuff (because in my opinion a good writer is a good writer regardless of what there writing about), but I don't have it in me to write the stuff either. Yami and Yugi just love each other in a special way that two people (despite gender) normally can't. Think about the kind of relationship you have with your same sex best friend and take it to another level. Being close doesn't mean you have to be an item. So that's what I was trying to portray in this chapter.
Ouuu I can't wait for the next chappie, how about you? I know, I know, you guys hate my cliffhangers and all, but that's just the way I can keep you reading this fic. Heh, cliffhangers you can't live with them, and you can't live without them….well maybe you can, but they also just make really good end points.
Anyho, I'm also excited to say that I've actually finished writing this fic, so that means I'm guaranteed to post it all up. Yep, I won't just leave you guys hangin like I would normally do! Now I know I was only going to make it 20 chapters, but the conclusion was just a little longer then I expected so it is exactly 21 chapters (only 2 more to go). Darn, and I wanted it to be a nice even number, but no it had to turn out to be just like me….odd. Well I guess you should be looking forward to the climax, and I guess I'll hear from you next update. Ciao for now!
p.s F.Y.I, since I finished writing the fic, you don't have to vote anymore, unless you really want to and your very convincing, however the 20 million votes for your friends and family and your pet raccoons (come on people) and all that other good stuff didn't count. They can vote for themselves, but believe me the point was well taken. You bunch of goof balls….you bunch of obsessive goofballs. ^_^ !!!