[Angelus goes at it with Gwen in more ways than one, then takes on an army. In Sunnydale, Spike and Connor try to get their respective grooves on.]
Gwen walks back into the study. She's wearing baggy black pants and a black long-sleeve t-shirt.
ANGELUS: Odd to see you out of uniform. What, no gloves?
GWEN: Don't need them around you.
Gwen sits down on the couch next to Angelus.
GWEN: Is it just me or are you even broodier than usual?
Angelus realizes he may be overacting.
ANGELUS: I can't help but think it's my fault, that if I hadn't searched for her, and brought her back, all of this suffering, all this death, could have been averted. She wasn't supposed to come back. With magic, there's always consequences. I had no idea they would be this horrible.
GWEN: You got something to back this up, other than your overactive guilty conscience?
ANGELUS: You're right. It's all in my head. But that doesn't make it feel any less real. It's just so damn operatic. My love made her evil.
GWEN: Can we make this a Cordy-free conversation?
ANGELUS: I'm sorry. I just wanted to let you know why Cordelia is in my past, why I'm moving on. I should have moved on after that night in the elevator. Took me 250 years to meet a woman who could make me feel alive. Should have known a good thing, a perfect thing, when I saw it.
GWEN: That's sweet. But I don't want to be the rebound girl.
ANGELUS: Actually, Cordy was the rebound girl. The one before her, it was pretty serious. For a little while. I even briefly succumbed to the pleasing delusion that I loved her. But in the end we were too different to make it work. I knew she needed someone less complicated. We're still friends, I think. It's been a while since we've talked. But enough about her. My point is, you're not the rebound girl. You're the one I've been looking for all along. The one woman who can understand me, make me feel like I'm not alone in this world.
GWEN: Please tell me you don't really believe that crap you just said. I'm not looking for a soul mate.
ANGELUS: That makes two of us. Just pretending to be a gentleman. I'm lonely. You're alone. It would be a shame for you to pass up this wonderful opportunity.
GWEN: I think I can turn that frown upside down for a few hours.
Anya and Spike enter the Bronze. Frank Black is onstage, inadvertently playing the role of the Greek Chorus. He performs the song "Out of State."
SPIKE: So when does Andrew get a crack at you? After Giles?
ANYA: Indirect implication is usually more insulting than blunt literalism. You're saying I'm a slut.
SPIKE: Xander's a slut.
ANYA: Why do you think I was interested in him?
SPIKE: You're merely an opportunist.
ANYA: An opportunist with taste. I don't settle. You're the one who dated Harmony twice.
SPIKE: Cat's got claws tonight. Like with Connor.
ANYA: He told you about that? But the marks were gone by morning. He heals very quickly.
SPIKE: Wish I used a different metaphor. Did he like it?
ANYA: Very much.
SPIKE: Figures. Boy's a budding masochist. What I meant was, Connor's barely set foot in town, and you've already had you way with him and cut him loose. You don't waste time.
ANYA: Why should I? My mortal life span is terrifyingly short.
SPIKE: And your bed's barely cold when you take me out.
ANYA: Actually, you're taking me out. You bought the tickets, remember? And you were the one who asked me out.
SPIKE: I just wonder who's next if you keep of this torrid pace.
ANYA: Is this because I slept with Xander?
FRANK BLACK: "Once there was love. Now there is nothing. I wasn't enough."
SPIKE: Why would I care about ancient history?
ANYA: I meant last week. In your bed. The one in the basement.
SPIKE: What!!? You shagged HIM I on the same sheets I slept on? I knew I smelled something, but I never thought – Good God! Do you know how sick that is? He was naked! In my bed!!
ANYA: It would have been even more disturbing if we used Buffy's bed. Or Dawn's. Now THAT would have been sick. Doing it on Willow's bed might have turned Xander on in a way which would have turned me off. Plus everyone sits on the couch, so that would have been plain wrong.
SPIKE: Could you at least have had the decency to burn the cot afterwards? One more reason I'm glad I moved out.
ANYA: Why have you moved out?
FRANK: "I can't come around down here. Not with you. And I won't hang around in vain. I can't come around down here. Not with you. And I won't be coming here again. I can't stand the pain."
SPIKE: Needed my freedom. Hated being tied down. Figuratively.
FRANK: "You say I belong. But you're wrong. You're wrong."
ANYA: Something happen between you and Buffy? Or not happen, as the case may be?
SPIKE: It's got sod all to do with her, and everything to do with me. Bloke needs some space to feel like a man.
Connor went home and cleaned himself up, using the water from the fountain in the courtyard. Then he put on a clean shirt – Angel's black shirt, the one Cordy gave him. There were no mirrors in any of the rooms, something which should have struck Connor as odd. But he had found a small mirror in the basement the day before, and brought it up to his bedroom. He checked his hair and then left. He wanted to see what young people did when they were not fighting demons.
Angelus lies on the bed, with Gwen lying to his left. Both look very satiated. She puts her right hand on his chest.
ANGELUS: Nothing's happening.
GWEN: Guess I'm spent.
ANGELUS: That would make two of us. You were spectacular.
GWEN: You done already?
ANGELUS: Just getting started.
He takes her right hand, starts sucking on her fingers one-by-one, then kisses her wrist. He quickly goes bumpy and bites down. After two seconds he lets go, opening his mouth as if it hurts. Gwen shoots out of bed and quickly gets her pants and shirt on. She grabs her wrist to try to stop the bleeding.
GWEN: Too hot for you?
Angelus get out of bed on the other side. He looks like he swallowed a combination of red chili peppers and hydrochloric acid. He's still all fangy and yellow-eyed as he gets his pants back on.
ANGELUS: I thought you were human.
GWEN: I am. I'm also electric. But I thought you knew that.
ANGELUS: You're like an electric eel. They don't shock you once you kill them. Bet you're the same way.
Angelus leaps across the bed. Gwen leaps to the other side. Angelus leaps back across. Gwen kicks Angelus while he's in midair. He hits the bed and falls to the side opposite her. When he rises, she leaps across and kicks him in the face.
ANGELUS: Usually I like to do the foreplay before the banging.
He grabs her and throws her across the bedroom into the wall. He leaps across and tries to get a hold of Gwen while she's down. Gwen crawls under the bed. Angelus laughs and tosses the bed aside. Gwen sweeps Angelus's legs out from under him and stands up. She attempts to kick him while he's down, but Angelus grabs her foot and pulls her back down. He tries to get on top of her, but she brings her feet inward and hits him in both ears. Angelus decides to get up. He walks towards the door and puts on his shirt, but hasn't had a chance to button it before Gwen hurls his shoes at his head. He loves seeing her scared.
ANGELUS: Come on, baby. Don't look so shocked. I'm a vampire. This is what I do to survive.
GWEN: You think you're the first vampire I've humped? No. You're just the first who was dumb enough to bite me.
She charges at him and leaps in the air. Angelus steps back out of the bedroom and into the library before she can get close. His face goes human again. He closes the door, puts on his shoes, and then knocks the bedroom door off its hinges. Gwen's also put her boots on.
ANGELUS: A vampire groupie! I had no idea. Cordy was right when she called you supertramp. So you've throbbed a lot of vampire hearts?
GWEN: Before you, just one. And he was a lot better.
Angelus looks shocked. Gwen leaps at him and lands a kick to his face. He staggers back about 15 feet. She follows.
ANGELUS: I'm sure lying makes it easier.
She throws a right kick. Angelus moves his head to the side to avoid it. She throws a left kick. He ducks.
GWEN: Funny part is, it's the truth.
She hits him with a right hook. He responds with a left jab. She throws another right. He grabs her arm and tosses Gwen on her back. She does that scissor move with her legs Buffy used to do to get back on her feet.
ANGELUS: You mean all those moans and screams and quivering sighs were the sounds of . . . disappointment?
GWEN: Didn't say you weren't good. Just that I've had better. Should I give you his name? Maybe you could ask him for some pointers.
Angelus throws a big right hook. Gwen backs out of the way.
GWEN: Now I've gotten under your skin.
ANGELUS: That was the plan. I was going to do you a favor. As a human, you have nowhere to go but down, and you know it. What will you be doing 30 years from now, when all your hair is gray and you don't look nearly so good in form-fitting rubber? All you would lose was your soul, which you don't use anyway. You're a criminal. You've killed people. The humans have never seen you as one of their own. Tell me where I'm wrong?
GWEN: I'm a freak. You're a monster.
Gwen attacks. She tries a right kick, which Angelus blocks. Then right and left punches, which she also blocks. He grabs hold of her arms, and she does a round off forward flip to break free. Gwen tries a left spin kick. Angelus ducks, and lands a right kick to her ribs.
ANGELUS: Freak. Monster. Nothing but semantics.
Gwen tries a left kick. Angelus grabs her foot. She does a black flip. He charges and tries a right punch. She grabs his right arm. He lands a left cross to the right side of her face. Still holding his right arm, she tries to flip Angelus onto his back. He shoves his left hand into her chest and knocks her into the side wall.
ANGELUS: I forgot how much fun the hand-to-hand was.
Gwen runs at Angelus, does a forward handstand, and tries to kick Angelus in the face. He backs up just in time to avoid the blow. When she her feet hit the ground, Angelus kicks Gwen in the stomach. Then he grabs her arms, pulls them behind her back, gives her a sly smirk, and throws her 30 feet backwards. She crashes into the rear bookcase, shattering several shelves, before falling the ground, along with dozens of books.
ANGELUS: I could beat you to death. But where's the fun in that? I wouldn't get to torture you. To tie you up. To hear you scream. I'll be back, Gwenny.
Angelus leaves. He's having a really, really good day. In the past few hours alone, he beat up his old buddies, tasted Fred, butchered Justine, slayed the Beast, and screwed Gwen. Truly a charmed life, Angelus thought to himself as he headed for home.
Connor enters the party. Kit and Carlos told him where it was at lunch. It is dark and humid and crowded and smells like those bars where Connor sometimes fought demons. 50 Cents' "In Da Club" plays on the stereo. Connor wades through the people, looking for familiar faces or potential vampires. Lacey runs up to him. The crowd forces people to stand close together, but she gets especially close to Connor.
LACEY: Connor! You made it!
CONNOR: Hey.
LACEY: Thanks again for sticking up for me.
CONNOR: I thought Edgar stuck up for you, and I stuck up for him?
LACEY: You know what I mean. Wanna dance?
CONNOR: I don't dance.
LACEY: Come on.
He looks around. He appears to be surrounded by people who are dancing. Connor feels like an awkward, self-conscious teenager.
CONNOR: Sorry. I'd look stupid.
LACEY: No. You look great.
CONNOR: You look good too.
She doesn't have on her glasses and her clothes are far less homely than what she wore in school that day. Lacey smiles. She thinks she's making progress. Edgar has been wondering where Lacey went. He sees her with Connor. As does Bradley.
BRADLEY: I don't freeking believe it.
EDGAR: Man, she's all over him.
BRADLEY: And last night he was with Amanda.
EDGAR: Didn't know you liked her.
BRADLEY: Didn't know you liked her either.
EDGAR: I don't like Amanda.
BRADLEY: I meant Lacey.
EDGAR: You saw her in Chem class. Connor this. Connor that. I met the guy a few hours ago, and already I'm sick of him.
Connor doesn't mind Lacey sidling up to him, but he's not in a predatory mindset.
CONNOR: Where's Edgar?
LACEY: Around.
CONNOR: Figured he'd be with you.
LACEY: We're just friends.
Connor looks around. He spots Kit. He's in the mood for hanging out with a woman who doesn't seem inclined to hit on him.
CONNOR: Hey Kit. Oh. And there's Carlos. I should say hi. I'll see you a little later, Lacey.
Connor gently touches her left arm with his right hand. She gets excited. He smiles and walks over to Kit and Carlos. Lacey gazes at her hero. Connor doesn't completely understand that she has a big crush on him. After all, he didn't even save her life. So in his mind, the damsel in distress model doesn't apply.
CONNOR: Hey guys.
KIT: How was Dawn?
CONNOR: We had a good time. Her sister made her come home. You know how Buffy can be.
CARLOS: Likes to keep her hermanita safe.
CONNOR: Tell me about it.
KIT: I'm gonna go get something to drink. Wanna come, Connor?
CONNOR: Sure.
He follows her. She's trying to look out for Dawn and get a sense of Connor's character. Kit's heard the rumors about Connor being a player. After a few days of doing nothing but talking to girls, Connor's acquired a reputation it took his father Liam several years of determined carousing to earn. A tall, skinny black kid with close-cropped hair walks over to Carlos.
CARLOS: What up, Clarence.
CLARENCE: Word is you hot for Denise.
CARLOS: Who told you that?
CLARENCE: My buddies on the track team.
CARLOS: You mean Sheldon and Rodney?
CLARENCE: Among others.
CARLOS: Shelly's one to talk.
CLARENCE: I don't hear you denying it.
CARLOS: I ain't denying that she's fine. She's one of the reasons I run track. I'm a baseball player. Why do I need to run? Denise is nice to me. Nicer than she is to Shelly or Rodney. So yeah. I like her. Can you blame me?
CLARENCE: I can blame you for playing so damn coy about it. Everyone knows you dig the sistas. Somethin' we have in common.
CARLOS: What was that?
CLARENCE: Come on. Your last two honeys?
CARLOS: Roberta's Dominican. Ana's Panamanian. That's different, man.
CLARENCE: So they don't count? Roberta's darker than me.
CARLOS: That's not why I liked her. Do people think I'm only into black chicks?
KIT: Sure you don't want anything to drink?
CONNOR: Let's go sit down.
They find space on one side of a couch. Connor's a little worn out by his busy day. In the back of her mind, Kit worries Connor's going to hit on her.
KIT: I hear you've been pretty busy.
CONNOR: With what?
He assumes she means demons, but doesn't want to freak her out if that's not what she's referring to.
KIT: With the ladies.
He assumes she means Anya. Possibly Cordy. Women he's slept with.
CONNOR: Not anymore.
KIT: Amanda last night. Dawn tonight. Lacey a few minutes ago. You get around.
CONNOR: I didn't do anything with them. Amanda's just a friend. Lacey's nice. Maybe a little too nice. I don't even know her.
KIT: And Dawn?
CONNOR: Dawn's different. I like hanging out with her. But we're not, you know.
KIT: So you don't like her in that way?
CONNOR: I like her in a lot of ways. I don't love her. I don't love anyone right now.
KIT: You mean there was someone you loved?
CONNOR: Before I came here. She was older. It got complicated. Don't want that again.
KIT: Don't want someone who's older?
CONNOR: Don't want someone who doesn't love me.
After their initial assault on the Hyperion, Gunn, Wes, Fred and Lorne led their teams on a clover-leaf shaped sweep of downtown Los Angeles. Each of the four teams went out in a different direction and then circled back so they would reunite on the hotel three hours after starting their shift. Angelus was walking home just as the teams were converging. When he was within a half-mile of the hotel, he heard the trucks swooping towards him. Angelus quickly realizes he is in danger of being cut off from his sanctuary. He runs for home, but gets only halfway there before realizing he would have to fight his way back. He sees this situation as more of a challenge than an actual threat. After all, this is his lucky day.
Wes, Gunn, Fred and Lorne approach the Hyperion on foot while the trucks with the soldiers circle the neighborhood, picking off every vampire they see. Angelus has climbed onto the fourth floor of a parking garage. He observes their massive firepower and swift mobility. Their trucks can run down any vampire, and their weapons can dust large numbers of them at once. Furthermore, they pick off vampires hiding in buildings. So he can't run, can't hide, and – for the moment at least – can't fight them. Angelus knows it is only a matter of time before they shoot at him.
One truck finally shoots a grenade at him. It lands a few feet away. Before it detonates, Angelus leaps out of the garage and goes bumpy. He falls 40 feet and lands in the truck. He grabs the two soldiers sitting in back and tosses them to the pavement. The two soldiers in front of him are working the napalm and grenade launchers, and are not prepared for hand-to-hand combat. But they quickly turn around and pull out their tasers. Before they can shock him, Angelus hits the one to his right with a left hook, and the one to his left with a right hook. They fall out of the vehicle. Realizing he is alone with a vampire, the driver slams on the brakes. Angelus jumps to the ground.
The soldier who shot the grenade at Angelus, who is also the one Angelus hit with a right hook, is closest to him. He lies at the curb. After falling off the truck, he hit his head on the pavement and was knocked unconscious. Angelus puts his upper teeth on top of the curb, and his lower jaw on the inside of the curb. Then he steps on the back of the soldier's head, snapping his neck. He's always wanted to do a "curbing." But he knows there isn't time to savor the gruesome kill. Angelus turns around and leaps at a soldier who is pointing his zap gun at him. He kicks the gun out of the soldier's hand and holds the soldier in front of his body as a shield from the two soldiers who are pointing their guns at him. But Angelus hears the driver approaching. He has left the vehicle and is sneaking up on Angelus from behind. Angelus snaps the soldier's neck and spins around. The dead soldier's body takes the electric charge. Then Angelus spins back around and tosses the body at the two other soldiers who are threatening him. Angelus goes to his knees and grabs the gun from the soldier he has just killed. He rolls over to the sidewalk, eluding the shots of the two soldiers. He fires back, forcing them to take cover. Then he picks up the gun and a grenade from the soldier he curbed. He dashes into a nearby alley for cover. The three soldiers radio for backup.
When Gunn and Wes charge into the front courtyard, they are in for a rude awakening. Cordelia has extended the sanctuary. Their grenades don't detonate. Gunn tries to stake a vampire, but can't. Wes tries to behead one with a sword, but fails to make contact. Fortunately, the vampires in the courtyard didn't know the sanctuary had been extended. Most fled Wes and Gunn. The two who remained are too confused to counter attack. Realizing what has happened, Wes and Gunn flee for the street.
Fred goes into the rear courtyard with the belligerent confidence of a Slayer. But her crossbow bolt bounces off of a vampire's chest. When she tries to hit another vampire with the front end of the crossbow, she fails. Fred tosses the crossbow back to Lorne, pulls out her poleaxe, and starts swinging. The vampires instinctively move away from the blades of the long, sharp, heavy weapon. Lorne runs around Fred and collides with a vampire. They repel one another.
LORNE: Fred, sweetie, that won't do you any good. Courtyard's off-limits.
Just to make sure, Fred swings at the closest vampire. Seeing the mystical shield in effect, she leaves with Lorne. There are vampires on the street trying to run into the Hyperion, and Fred can take out a few of them. Amidst the confusion, Lindsey had his chopper land him on the roof of the hotel. From there he surveys the action and hopes that the sanctuary spell doesn't hold for the roof.
Another truck, filled with five soldiers, has approached Angelus's hiding spot. He crouches behind a dumpster, which protects him from the napalm canisters with ignite in front of the and to the left of the dumpster. Then a grenade is lobbed over the dumpster, landing two feet behind Angelus. He leaps into the dumpster. Its metal sides protect him from the blast and the wooden shrapnel. Not the most dignified hiding spot, but it does save his life. Angelus peers out of the dumpster. The truck has entered the alley. It's closing in on him. He pulls the pin out of the grenade and tosses it into the truck. The five soldiers leap out. The explosion hurts none of them, and barely scratches the vehicle. But by getting the soldiers on their feet, it has freed Angelus. He leaps out of the dumpster, brandishing a gun in each hand. He charges at the soldiers, firing at them with both weapons. He isn't sure how these things work, if or when they run out of "ammunition," need re-charging, or whatever. He just hopes they work until he can get home. The five soldiers hit the ground for cover. Angelus moves too fast for them to get a good shot at him. He leaps over the empty truck. The three soldiers from the first vehicle open fire on Angelus. He rolls to the side, and from one knee hits two of them in the chest, dazing them. The other soldier hits Angelus's shirt just below the left armpit, burning a hole through the fabric but missing his skin by an inch. He runs across the street, firing erratically, since he's moving. The soldier can't hit Angelus before he ducks down a sidestreet.
He runs for a block, then turns left. He is two blocks from home. Angelus watches two trucks zoom by, then dashes to the other side of the street. One of them fires a napalm round at him which singes the bottom of his forehead and the front of his hair, giving him highlights. He climbs up the fire escape to the roof. He runs to the end of the block and leaps down. From there it's about a 100 yard dash across open ground to the Hyperion. Fred, Gunn, Wes and Lorne are on other sides of the building, and don't see him. Angelus scales the side wall of the hotel, making his way onto the roof. Lindsey waits for him, hidden behind an air conditioning fan. He aims his pistol and hits Angelus in the back with a dart. Angelus reaches behind and pulls it out.
ANGELUS: Funny, but I don't even feel like yawning.
Angelus throws the dud tranquilizer dart down to the ground, opens a door, and walks down into his hotel. When Angelus is gone, the helicopter returns and takes Lindsey away. Angelus heads back to his suite. He is soon greeted by Alanna, his favorite consort. She runs her right hand down his face.
ALANNA: Master, you're hurt.
ANGELUS: It'll heal. The things I killed won't. I'll tell you all about it. Let's just say the last few hours will be hard to top.
She rips off his shirt, wraps her arms around his chest and kisses him on the lips.
ALANNA: I'll try my best.
ANGELUS: Don't you always? Run me a bath, darling. Take these guns to Cecil. See what he can make of them. And bring me up a snack. Something young and tender. Not in the mood for a struggle. Had enough of that for one day.
GILES: I'll check out Connor's story first thing tomorrow morning.
BUFFY: He said Sunnydale was less dangerous than where he came from. Are there that many demons in Utah?
GILES: Not nearly enough to cause a person to be blase about the Hellmouth. And I think he was referring to the places he had been to after Holtz died and before he came here. That name. Holtz. Something about that name.
BUFFY: You think you know him? Is there a disgraced ex-Watcher with that name?
GILES: No. And I didn't say I knew the person. I said I knew the name. Read it in books a while back, I think. Just can't put it in the proper context right now. Something to research tomorrow morning.
ANYA: He's far too large and fleshy to have been a pixie.
SPIKE: For the last time, that was the name of his band.
ANYA: So the other members were pixies?
SPIKE: No! It was just a name.
ANYA: That's false advertising. This is one of their songs?
SPIKE: Yes. The first one he's done so far. It's usually the only one he plays from that far back.
ANYA: I like it. It's catchy. It's upbeat. And it's about dismemberment. I think I actually did what he's singing about once or twice.
"Wave of Mutilation" ends. "I Bleed" begins.
FRANK BLACK: "As loud as hell, the ringing bell. Behind my smile, it shakes my teeth. And all the while, as vampires feed, I bleed."
ANYA: Are you sure he's not an ex-demon? He obviously seems to know his stuff.
SPIKE: It's a metaphor. Symbolism. Not to be taken literally. Like most people, he's probably never even seen a demon.
Spike hears ominous sounds to his right. People are fleeing something. Spike glimpses human body parts. Then he sees a large, white demon devouring them. It grabs a second victim by the right arm as he tries to get away. The demon bites off the arm and sinks its teeth into the man's chest. Panic spreads amongst the 300 or so people inside the Bronze.
SPIKE: Go to the exits. Get these people out.
Anya runs to the rear exit and begins to shepherd the friendly masses outside. Spike stands up. The demon is thickly built and stands a little over six-and-a-half feet tall. Hanging from its upper jaw are two curved tusks, each 4 inches long. Its body and head are ivory-colored. The demon's face is smooth and shiny. It is round in shape, with a thick brow and two small holes where a protruding nose should be. Its ears are long and pointed and gray. Silver spikes run from the top of its head down its spine. Here and there over the surface of its body are small gray bumps.
The demon picks up another victim. Spike runs at the demon and kicks it in the chest. The demon drops the human, who runs off to safety. The band has fled the stage in terror and confusion. The demon picks up a stray leg and swallows it in two bites. Then it strikes Spike with the back of his right hand, knocking Spike to the ground. He gets up, goes bumpy and growls at the demon. The demon responds with a blood-curdling roar. His teeth are few (16, not counting the tusks), but long and pointy. His eyes are pink.
SPIKE: Bloody overgrown albino walrus. I'll make you sorry for ruining my show.
Spike charges the demon and punches him in the face. The demon grabs Spike, who tries to go for the eyes. The demon throws Spike 30 feet back. He crashes through a metal support column which holds up the balcony. Part of the balcony collapses on Spike's head. The demon begins to walk to the front exit. Spike looks around. The place is empty. Everyone's escaped. Now all he has to do is prevent the flesh-eating albino walrus from leaving the building. Spike grabs a piece of the shattered column and hits the demon in the head with it. Then he hits it in the body. The demon grabs the metal bar and tosses it to the left. He tries to punch Spike's face. Spike ducks and hits the demon's chin with a right uppercut. The demon connects with a left hook. Spike laughs and hits the demon with a right roundhouse kick. The demon takes a few steps back. Spike's filled with his old blood lust. He's thrilled by the prospect of a good scrape. The two demons stare each other down in the pit between the stage and the wreckage of what used to be the balcony.
SPIKE: Never killed a monster with its own teeth before. Cum on, coo-coo-ca-choo. Take a bite outta me.
The demon doesn't seem interested in Spike's flesh. It must like his victims alive. Spike hits the demon with a right cross. The demon responds with a powerful right to Spike's gut. Then with the left hand he grabs Spike by the throat and lifts him about a foot off the ground.
SPIKE: Ugly AND stupid? I'm a VAMPIRE, you nit!
Spike kicks the demon in the face. It doesn't loosen its grip. Spike realizes its not trying to choke him. It's trying crush his neck. The demon's hand is large enough to reach around to the back of Spike's neck. It's trying to crush Spike's spine, thereby killing him. Spike reaches around with his two hands to the back of his neck, attempting to pry loose the demon's fingers. He pulls back the demon's thumb and middle finger, nearly breaking them. The demon lets go and Spike gets his feet back on the ground. He throws a right punch, which the demon blocks. But he connects with a left to the demon's body. Spike ducks to avoid a right hook, hits the demon in the face with a left jab, and tries a right hook of his own. The demon grabs Spike's right arm and tosses him into the drum kit onstage. Spike stands up, grabs a 20-inch cymbal, and hurls it at the demon's neck. It goes about two inches into the neck before stopping. The demon pulls it out and tosses the cymbal back at Spike. He ducks, and the cymbal slices through the curtains behind the stage. The demon charges Spike. Spike picks up the mic stand and hits the demon in the head with its base, preventing the demon from climbing onstage. After taking two hits, the demon wrestles the mic stand away from Spike and tosses it to the right. Spike looks around for another weapon. He picks up an electric guitar. At that moment, Frank Black pops his head out from backstage to salvage his gear. Spike is temporarily star-struck.
SPIKE: Mr. Frank Black. It's truly an honor. Can I borrow your ax?
Spike still has on his demon face. Frank Black stares in stunned horror at this smiling fan with pointy fangs, yellow eyes and a bumpy forehead.
FRANK: Whatever.
He runs backstage, leaves through the musicians' exit, hops onto the bus with the rest of his band and speeds out of town. They've decided to ditch the gear.
SPIKE: Always heard he was a shy fellow. Oh well.
Robin Wood has come to the scene of the chaos and taken on the demon. To the demon, he's more of a meal than a threat. Spike sees the demon grab Robin with both its paws and lift him in the air. It opens its mouth and prepares to sink its tusks into his scalp. Spike hits the demon over the head with the guitar, shattering the instrument and causing the demon to let go of Robin. The demon kicks Robin in the chest and sends him through some drywall. Spike leaps off the stage and kicks the demon in the head. He tries another kick, but the demon grabs Spike's foot. Spike does a backflip to break free. The demon runs at Spike and hits him in the face with a right jab. Spike flies backwards, hits the near side of the pool table, and lands on the far side. Anya is nearby, crouched on the ground.
ANYA: Everyone's safe.
SPIKE: Not everyone.
Robin gets up. He pulls a 2x4 out of the wall and swings it at the demon. It blocks the blows and levels Robin with a right hook.
SPIKE: Get HIM out of here.
The demon looks down at Robin. Anya dashes over. The demon turns to see her. Spike picks up the pool cue and throws it at the demon. It goes straight through the center of its chest, and sticks there, half out the back and half in front. The demon pulls the stick out and tosses it into the wall behind Spike. The cue shatters. Anya helps Robin up and they run towards the front exit.
WOOD: Go get Buffy. I have to stay here.
ANYA: To die? To get eaten?
WOOD: What are you waiting for!?
Wood pushes Anya out the door.
ANYA: Fine! Be a macho man. Just hope Buffy doesn't find your mangled corpse when she gets here.
Anya leaves, convinced Wood is doing this to keep Spike from getting all the glory. She knows Buffy has a way of inspiring men to do really brave and stupid things to impress her.
The demon purrs and sticks the tip of its black tongue out the left corner of its mouth as it approaches Wood, who stands ready to defend himself and keep the demon from getting out the door.
SPIKE: You're a sod-awful glutton. How many blokes does it take to keep your belly full? And you're not just satisfied with the blood. Like Grendel without the charm.
The demon stops and glances to the left at Spike, who's walking towards it.
SPIKE: That's right. I'm not done with you yet, Eggman.
In addition to the Beatles reference, the epithet is apt because the demon's smooth white head kind of looks like an egg. The demon walks towards Spike. When the demon is about five feet in front of Spike, it opens his mouth and lets out a mighty roar. Its lower jaw is at a 90 degree angle to its upper jaw. For the first time, Spike gets a close look at how massive this creature's mouth is. He can see past the tusks, past the teeth which are each at least as long as Spike's fangs, and down the demon's throat. From that close, the roar seems about as loud as a jet engine.
SPIKE: Think that scares me? Well, yeah. It does. Jus' a little.
Spike backs up. The Beast follows. Spike is trying to get it away from the door and away from Wood. He's also searching for some new weapons. Spike stands at the back of the pool table. The demon stands at the front. The demon lifts it up and throws the table in Spike's direction. Spike moves to the left and emerges unscathed. The demon approaches and throws a left hook. Spike blocks it with both his arms. He head-butts the demon, smashing his forehead into its right tusk. It doesn't chip the tusk, but appears to hurt the demon nonetheless. Spike's gaining confidence. He punches the demon in the mouth with his right fist. Its lower teeth cut Spike's knuckles. But Spike notices the demon is missing one of his front teeth. Spike smiles. The demon clocks him in the left cheek with a right hook. Spike is dazed, but doesn't let that damper his confidence. He punches the demon in the chest, where a hole remains from where the cue stick hit it. The demon tries a left jab. Spike ducks and sweeps the demon's legs out from under him. For the first time, the demon is on its back. Spike looks down. He's bloodied and bruised but smiling ear-to-ear.
SPIKE: Killing innocent people. That I can tolerate. Bollixing up MY CONCERT! That you pay for.
Spike leaps on top of the demon and grabs its head. The demon pulls its legs in and pushes out against Spike's chest. Spike flies through the glass display case near the bar. The demon slowly stands up and looks at Robin. It assumes the pesky vampire wants to drink the human himself. In its mind, this fight with Spike is nothing but a turf battle. By now it has proven its dominance, and the vampire will surely go somewhere else to feed. Robin doesn't back away from the challenge. He stands firm and throws a right hook. The demon grabs Robin's right wrist with his left paw and tosses Robin head-first through a brick wall. Spike picks up a filled keg from behind the bar and raises it over his head with both hands.
SPIKE: What do I have to do to get your bleeding attention!!?
The demon turns to his left rear and walks towards the vampire who can't take a hint. Spike tosses the keg. It hits the demon in the face. It staggers back a few steps. Its knees wobble but the demon doesn't go down. Spike runs towards the door. Robin's trying to get up. Spike helps him to his feet. Spike stands to Robin's right.
SPIKE: Stubborn bugger. Am I right?
Spike's talking about the demon, but his comment could also refer to Robin. Wood looks on the ground to his left and is glad the demon sent him through the wall, because now dozens of loose bricks lie on the ground. He picks one up and tosses it at the demon. Then another. Then another. The demon stops walking towards the door when he is 20 feet away and puts up his right arm to shield him face. Spike notices this and smiles.
SPIKE: Way to use the old noggin, Robin.
Spike throws two bricks at a time, going for the demon's chest at first, then for its knees. The demon backs up to about 30 feet from Spike and Wood. Finally, it picks up a chair and uses it as a shield.
SPIKE: Not as stupid as I thought.
Then the demon hurls the chair at Spike and Wood. This causes them to stop hurling bricks. The demon approaches. When it is within 20 feet, Wood throws the chair back it it. The demon bats it away. 15 feet. Spike picks up a table and sends that in the demon's direction. The demon smashes it with both, but stops advancing for a second. Spike throws a second table, which the demon grabs and tosses in the direction of the stage. 10 feet.
SPIKE: You've been gallant. Now go. I don't think he eats my kind.
5 feet. They can feel its breath, which reeks of human remains.
WOOD: I stay until Buffy arrives.
SPIKE: Then all I can promise is I won't let him bite your corpse. And of course I won't bite it either.
The demon snarls.
WOOD: Just like you did with my mother.
The demon drowns out Wood's comment, so Spike doesn't hear it. Robin picks up a brick in his left hand, grips it tight and swings for the demon's head. It blocks the brick with its right fist and breaks it up. The demon hits Wood in the head with a left hook. Wood tumbles to the ground unconscious.
SPIKE: Tried to warn you, mate. Now its just you and me, toothy.
The demon straitens its arms and swings them at Spike, trying to box his ears. Spike grabs the demon's arms and tries to push them back outward. From the start, he's losing this test of strength. Spike goes back to his human face, a sign that he's growing tired. While the demon's arms are pushing Spike's arms back inward, he kicks the demon in the stomach, then in the chin, with his right foot. The demon steps back. Spike looks cocky, and closes in. The demon throws a right hook. Spike ducks and gets behind the demon. He jumps on its back and grabs its head. Finding the head is too slick to get a good enough grip for snapping its neck, he grabs onto the two tusks and tries to rip them out. After all, he promised he would do this at the beginning of the fight. The demon shrieks in pain. It backs up into a brick wall and slams Spike through it.
Spike lets go. The demon is about ten feet from the door. Spike hurls bricks at the back of its head. The demon turns around. Spike grabs a brick in each hand and dives between the demon's legs. Now Spike is back between the demon and the door. He throws one brick. The demon knocks it away with its right hand. The demon runs at Spike. He throws the other brick, but the demon knocks it away with its left hand. Spike hits the demon in the stomach with a right punch, and in the face with a left hook. The demon boxes Spike's ears. Spike realizes he is losing consciousness. The demon hits his face with a right, then a left, then a right. Spike's mouth is filled with his own blood. He eyes stare off into the distance. But his feet hold firm. The demon lands a final left hook, and Spike falls on top of Wood.
The demon kicks open the doors and beats its chest a few times. It runs into the middle of the street and grabs a man. Buffy and Giles arrive. They heard the commotion and were halfway there when Anya found them and explained as best she could what was happening. Kennedy is right behind Buffy, with Molly, Rona, Vi and Amanda behind her. Buffy gets within 50 feet of the creature when she sees it bite off the man's head.
BUFFY: Giles! Get the girls out of here!!
He takes the Potentials around the corner, leaving Kennedy to watch over them so he can return to Buffy. After swallowing the head, the demon sinks its tusks into the chest, and turns the body upside-down. It appears to be sucking out the innards.
BUFFY: Hey ugly!
The demon tosses what's left of the corpse to the sidewalk. Blood and gore run down its chin and chest.
BUFFY: Made you look.
Buffy is genuinely horrified, and is using the humor purely as a defensive mechanism to keep herself from getting scared. The demon runs towards her. Buffy runs towards the demon. She leaps in the air and kicks it in the head. The demon is knocked back about ten feet by stays upright. Buffy lands a right roundhouse kick to the chest and a left jab to the chin. The demon raises its left fist and thumps Buffy on the top of her head. She feels wobbly. Then the demon clocks her in the chin with a left uppercut. By now a normal human would have at least a severe concussion. Buffy just loses her sense of equilibrium. The demon kicks her in the chest with its right foot, knocking Buffy on her back.
The demon glances to its right and sees Connor galloping towards it. He left the party about 30 minutes ago and was wondering through the warehouses a half-mile south, looking for demons to fight. Once he heard the tumult, he raced to the scene to play champion. This demon was big and strong, but it didn't look as scary as the Beast (Connor hadn't seen it eat people), so he wasn't intimated. He leaps at the demon. It knocks Connor to the ground with a swipe of the back of its left hand. Buffy stands up, as does Connor. The demon looks behind it. It seems distracted. Connor flies at the creature, trying to land a midair kick. The demon jumps ten feet backwards and disappears through a portal. Connor tumbles to the ground.
CONNOR: Who opened the portal? Was that you, Giles?
GILES: It wasn't any of us.
The Potentials run back up to Buffy. Anya comes to her from the other direction.
ANYA: Robin and Spike are hurt!
Buffy, Anya, Connor and Giles run to the Bronze. Spike and Robin are passed out, Spike lies on top of Robin. Spike groans and moves his head. He opens his eyes.
SPIKE: What the - ?
Robin also opens his eyes. Both men look very upset to be in such close proximity to one another.
ANYA: This isn't what it looks like.
GILES: Looks like they went down together fighting that demon.
ANYA: Okay, it is what it looks like.
Spike rolls off of Wood. Buffy kneels down to look at Robin. His right eye is swollen shut. His nose is bleeding. His tank top is bloody. The top of his head has several cuts and one large, bumpy bruise. There is blood in his right ear.
ROBIN: Did you kill it?
BUFFY: Don't worry. It's gone.
Buffy smiles down at him.
GILES: I think he needs to go to the hospital. I'll go get my car.
As Buffy watches over Robin, Anya checks on Spike.
ANYA: They all got out. You saved them.
Spike tries to get up.
SPIKE: Where is he? Need to show that wanker what happens when you mess up Spike's fun. Can't let im get away with that.
Against Anya's urgings, Spike stands up and staggers around.
Connor walks through the trashed club. He sees the fallen balcony, the holes in the wall, the broken debris and shattered glass. It is obvious to him that one hell of a fight had just happened there. He is sorry he missed it.
Spike gets on his knees.
SPIKE: Where is it? I know it was around here.
Anya and Buffy think Spike is delirious. Spike gets up, proudly holding up the tooth he knocked out of the demon's mouth.
SPIKE: Found it! See? The walrus got the worst of that scrape.
Spike collapses to the ground.
Spike, Giles, Buffy, Connor, Willow, Kennedy, Dawn and Anya are in the living room. Spike and Connor are standing up. Dawn is on the right side of the couch, Buffy in the center, and Willow on the left, with Kennedy on the armrest next to Willow. Giles sits opposite Willow, and Anya sits opposite Dawn. Spike and Connor are standing up, Connor near the hallway, Spike against the wall next the to fireplace. Spike has a bandage around his right hand and an icebag on top of his head. He still looks pretty thrashed.
BUFFY: You can have my seat if you want.
SPIKE: I'm fine.
BUFFY: You sure?
SPIKE: I've had hangovers a lot worse than this.
Willow, Dawn, Anya and Giles look through books.
BUFFY: Any progress?
GILES: I believe I have found our creature. It's called a Tur-Amon. A predecessor of the Tura-Khan.
WILLOW: An Uber, Uber-vamp?
DAWN: He's wrong. [Giles looks a wee bit stunned] Tur-Amon's don't eat human flesh. [She shows him the picture in her book, which looks similar to the one in his book.] It was a Tur-Am. It's a little bigger than the Tur-Amon, and its tusks are about twice as long. Earliest known demon ancestor of the Tura-Khan.
Connor glances over at Dawn and does a sly little half-grin. After getting bossed around by Angel (not to mention Gunn), Connor has a healthy respect for showing up the people in charge.
BUFFY: An Uber, Uber, Uber-vamp?
WILLOW: Or would that be an Ur-vamp?
GILES: Actually, the Tur-Am isn't an ancestor of the Tur-Amon.
DAWN: The Tur-Am's the daddy and the Tur-Amon's the mommy.
GILES: I was just going to say that.
DAWN: The Tura-Khan is their offspring. It's all-demon, like its parents, but it's asexual. Eventually the Tur-Ams and Tur-Amons died out in this dimension. Tura-Khans couldn't reproduce, so they bit humans to make vampires.
GILES: The Turakhans eventually left, presumably for a more hospitable environment. They are far more common that Turams, so tonight's appearance is highly significant.
WILLOW: Should we assume this has something to do with the First?
GILES: I don't see how it can't.
ANYA: Does this mean the apocalypse is also the work of the First?
GILES: No. But it's safe to say the events are connected. The First is behaving opportunistically.
BUFFY: While we're busy saving the world, this Ur-vamp will run around town killing everything in sight. As if our plates weren't full enough. What are the ground rules for fighting this thing?
SPIKE: Staking doesn't kill it, cause I already tried it. Beheading is difficult. Like chopping down a tree trunk. Single blow won't get the job done.
GILES: And the standard vampire rules might not apply. There's a chance it's immune to sunlight. We must remember that the Turam is not an Uber-vamp, or an Ur-vamp, but a demon first and foremost. A demon that is tougher than anything we have faced in a long while.
CONNOR: Do we know when it's going to come back? Or where?
ANYA: We can read the portal. See if it's an in-y. Or an out-y.
WILLOW: We already know it's an out-y.
ANYA: We need to find out if it's both.
GILES: But there's the problem of proximity.
WILLOW: The spell needs to be performed in the immediate vicinity. We can't just do it on the street and expect no one to notice.
ANYA: I know a place nearby.
She looks at Giles.
GILES: Of course. Do we have the requisite supplies?
ANYA: Between the three of us? Easy.
GILES: I say we strike while the portal is hot.
The three of them get up.
WILLOW: Which place are we going to?
Giles and Anya give Willow knowing half-smiles.
WILLOW: Oh no.
BUFFY: What just happened?
GILES: We're going to check if the Turam can re-enter our dimension through the portal he used to leave it. If not, we will be able to ascertain the location of the portal he is using to enter our dimension. Once we know that, we can monitor that portal's energy and be prepared for the Turam's return.
BUFFY: Thanks for the translation. I hate it when you guys talk magic.
CONNOR: I hate magic. Always makes things worse.