Willow and Kennedy enter Willow's bedroom.
WILLOW: How do you feel after your first apocalypse?
KENNEDY: Relieved. Grateful. When your life's in danger, you think about what you'll miss if you die. The people you'll never see again. The things you'll never do again. Reminded me what I was fighting for.
Kennedy kisses Willow. A little while later, Kennedy notices something's not right. She pulls back. Willow can see the surprise in Kennedy's face.
WILLOW: What's wrong?
KENNEDY: You're — you're different.
WILLOW: [feels face] Oh no. Not again.
KENNEDY: It's not him. You're not a guy.
Willow looks in the mirror.
WILLOW: Omigod. Omigod. Oh no.
KENNEDY: Who is it? I mean, who are you? On the outside.
WILLOW: Miss Calendar.
KENNEDY: Who's that?
WILLOW: Jenny Calendar. My high school computer science teacher. Why? Why her?
KENNEDY: Was she your first crush?
WILLOW: No! God no! Although, looking at myself —
KENNEDY: You're beginning to wonder why she wasn't?
WILLOW: No!! I'm beginning to figure out why I'm her. Sort of. She was the one who got me interested in magic.
KENNEDY: We know how to make this go away.
Kennedy kisses Willow. Willow pushes her away.
WILLOW: What if that doesn't work?
KENNEDY: Then I'll just have to learn to live with the new you.
Kennedy smiles and kisses Willow again. Willow begins the question Kennedy's motives.
WILLOW: You don't seem too upset about that happening. [she leaves]
KENNEDY: Willow, wait! Please. Come back! I know it's still you inside, and you're the one I love. You have no reason to be jealous.
Willow runs down the stairs. Kennedy follows. Giles sees her in the living room and nearly has a stroke. He screams and backs up.
GILES: You're the First. Get away from me. You're not real.
WILLOW: Giles, it's me, Willow.
KENNEDY: I kissed her, and she —
XANDER: Again!?
GILES: She's turned Jenny before?
ANYA: She turned into Warren. Willow, you either have to stop kissing Kennedy, stop subconsciously doing this to yourself, or, failing that, maybe next time you can ask your subconscious turn to you into Lorenzo Lamas.
ANDREW: That would be cool.
Xander touches Willow's shoulder to make sure she's corporeal. Giles is about to, but Willow slaps his hand.
WILLOW: Don't! That would just be WAY to weird.
Giles moves back.
GILES: As if this wasn't weird enough already.
ANYA: So this is what Jenny looked like. Giles, I'm impressed.
ANDREW: No one taught recursive functions like Miss Calendar. Why would Willow turn into a person who dated Giles?
XANDER: You said that you once had a huge crush on him.
KENNEDY: You never told me this. Ewww. That's kinda gross. He's old enough to be —
ANYA: Spike's grandson? No, great-grandson.
KENNEDY: Well, when you put it that way, no, it doesn't help. It just makes whatever Spike and Buffy did seem that much sicker.
ANYA: That's it! Willow had a crush on Giles. So she turns into the woman Giles loved. A manifestation of her repressed feelings for Giles.
ANDREW: Willow kisses Giles and goes back to normal.
ANYA: It would be horribly awkward, but only for a few seconds.
GILES: There has to be another way. Because I'm not doing that. [goes into the kitchen for some Scotch.]
XANDER: You could kiss me. [Willow slaps him.] Well, it couldn't hurt.
WILLOW: You people are no help at all.
Willow runs out the front door. Kennedy chases after her.
KENNEDY: Willow! Willow! Come back! Willow? Willow?
Willow opens her eyes. She's in bed.
KENNEDY: Willow? Willow, are you okay?
WILLOW: [checks hair. It's still red] Whew. Just a nightmare.
KENNEDY: Say, as long as we're both up . . .
Willow smiles and forgets all about the disturbing dream.
Gwen is at home. She calls Lindsey.
LINDSEY: So what was our boy up to?
GWEN: Fancy party in Beverly Hills. Lots of star power. And security.
LINDSEY: Does that mean you couldn't get in?
GWEN: Angelus snuck in, so of course I could. He wasn't making too much of a scene. Maybe he just went to star gaze and snack discreetly. Went straight home after.
LINDSEY: A-list of B-list?
GWEN: What? Oh, the celebrities. Pretty high wattage.
LINDSEY: Let's just hope he didn't kill anyone with talent.
GWEN: I didn't see any of that.
LINDSEY: He'll probably rest for a while. Or debauch, or whatever it is his kind does. We should do the same. Rest, I mean. Talk to you later.
Lindsey goes down to greet the teams as they return.
FAITH: Wicked shame you have to leave so soon.
TAYLOR: You're telling me. You were awesome. Absolutely amazing out there.
FAITH: Thanks for covering me. [she means in the tactical military sense]
TAYLOR: Anytime.
CHET: [to Taylor] You got that right.
LINDSEY: I knew she'd be good for morale.
LORNE: That's the least of it. The things she did. Such power, such charisma. I can see why Angel had a thing for her.
LINDSEY: That was a different Slayer.
LORNE: Right. Of course. I knew that. What I meant was I understand why he had a thing for a Slayer. Now that I've seen one in action.
WES: Any word on Angelus?
LINDSEY: He's at home. Ya'al should come upstairs. I got something for you.
GUNN: Where's Fred. Oh, there she is. Gettin' friendly with the soldiers. [Charles and Wes look worried]
WES: Fred? Winifred? Could you join us? [she comes over]
FRED: Sorry. I was just discussing the quantum properties of their guns.
GUNN: Yeah. I'm sure they were interested in your physics.
WES: Men in uniform always get that excited over Plank's Constant and the Photoelectric Effect.
Fred thinks they're both being paranoid and hypocritical. They all go upstairs.
FAITH: What now? We chill?
WES: After you've rested we can do a little patrolling.
LINDSEY: If Angelus makes a move, you'll be the first to know.
FAITH: Cool. I'm gonna go run up a huge room service bill, if ya don't mind. Slaying always makes me really hungry and, well, just hungry for now. [she leaves]
WES: You said you had something for us?
Lindsey hands each of them an envelope.
LINDSEY: I billed each of you at 500-an-hour. Is that your usual rate?
Wes, Gunn, Fred and Lorne open their envelopes.
FRED: Six thousand dollars!
LORNE: This check should get the bill collectors off my back.
GUNN: I thought you said you were working for free?
LINDSEY: I am. And the company is. Doesn't mean I expect people to risk their lives for nothing. [clearly he's not a champion] The soldiers each got 200-an-hour. As commanders, you were entitled to more. There was no guarantee of payment. I did this on spec. Once you guys got going and showed what you could do, I was able to convince some local business to make donations. Entirely voluntary, I assure you. But what they paid was a small fraction of what they gained from your efforts to make the city safe again.
WES: They paid you protection money?
LINDSEY: No. We were protecting them regardless of whether they gave us money.
WES: And if they didn't? Did you threaten to make things go back to the way they were?
GUNN: We get paid for killing demons. That's our job. I don't see the problem. I just see a lot more zeros that I have in a while. As long as there ain't no strings attached, I'm down with this.
FRED: I'm with Charles. [Wes doesn't like the sound of that]
Cordy enters the Hyperion. Alanna and Tina kneel before her. Cordy puts out her hands and they each kiss a ring. Olivia is seen tumbling down the stairs to the landing. Angelus walks after her.
ANGELUS: I told you to bring me a virgin! [he slaps her]
OLIVIA: She was 14.
ANGELUS: She had needle marks on her arms. That should have tipped you off. Why can't you be like Val? [Angelus turns around. Val is behind him. She's tall, with long black hair and pale blue eyes. He kisses her wrist.] Wonderful Vala. (Germanic for "chosen one") My new favorite.
He picks up Olivia by the hair and tosses her down the last few stairs. She lands in the lobby. Angelus walks down with Val on his arm.
ANGELUS: Cordelia. What brings you here?
CORDY: Certainly not the company. Vampires are sooo unworthy of my presence. Except for you, Angelus. Then again, you are much, much more than a vampire.
Val also looks at Cordy and kneels. (she blotted out the sun. She brought back Angelus. To them, she's a quasi-deity. Buffy did say that Glory reminded her of Cordelia.) Tina, Alanna and Val all sit down at the circular sofa. Angelus walks past them. He is wearing shiny new black leather pants, a black shirt which is unbuttoned, a rolex, and a large diamond and platinum neck chain. Cordy looks dismayed.
CORDY: First of all, lose the bling-bling.
ANGELUS: The what?
CORDY: The necklace. The watch. Why are you trying to look like P Diddy?
ANGELUS: Who's that? A new vampire in town? [Cordy groans]
CORDY: Poor Angelus. Still trapped in the 90s. The 1890s. [he hands over the jewelry] Thank you. I'll use these to buy you something nice. What were you thinking?
ANGELUS: Trophies I took off a kill last night. Walking into this party, I push him aside, and he gives me lip. Tells me I'm not paying him respect. Has two huge bodyguards with big guns. I snap their necks. Then I snap his. And he's carrying a money clip with $10,000 inside. [pulls out money clip. Tosses it to his vampire women.] What kind of fool walks around with that much cash?
CORDY: Did he have a big cross around his neck?
ANGELUS: I think I would have noticed that.
CORDY: So it probably wasn't P Diddy. Like I'd care about him anyway. So last millennium. Did he have a band-aid on his face?
ANGELUS: No. Why?
CORDY: Phew. I actually would miss Nelly.
ANGELUS: That wasn't the fun part.
CORDY: What was?
ANGELUS: I go inside, and I see this Irish guy who says he's an actor. A little shorter than me. Hair like me. Dresses like me. Acts like me. Got a girl on each arm. I take one of them for myself. A model or something. The guy gets mad. Threatens to kick my ass. You can imagine what happens next.
CORDY: Dark, Irish. Actor. Good-looking?
ANGELUS: Not as handsome as I am. Then again, who is?
CORDY: Good point.
ANGELUS: I threw a few insults out, made him attack me, and then I cracked his skull.
CORDY: Omigod! You killed Colin Farrell!?
ANGELUS: Who? No. The guy was breathing. Just a little unconscious. Had to teach him a lesson. But that was just the beginning. The other girl he was with, this young blonde with a nasally southern accent. She starts totally hitting on me. She was all over me, actually. Kinda tipsy. And very grabby.
CORDY: Oh, you're right, this is getting good. You didn't recognize her?
ANGELUS: No. She seemed surprised that I didn't. Which might have turned her on even more. I don't know. The accent was a turn-off. One of my pet-peeves. But I can't get rid of her. Practically have to kill her to get her off me.
CORDY: [smiling] Did you?
ANGELUS: No.
CORDY: Dammit.
ANGELUS: She went away and started sucking face with this blonde guy who looked like, well, like Spike's younger brother or something. And he talked like he was from the ghetto. Total loser. Guess they deserved each other.
CORDY: You didn't kill either of them?
ANGELUS: No. I went off with the model. I had my fun with her and killed her. So these people I ran into. They're famous?
CORDY: Yes. Very.
ANGELUS: Actors?
CORDY: Pop singers.
ANGELUS: Oh well. So what did you come here to tell me?
CORDY: I had a vision. Of Connor getting beat up by Buffy.
ANGELUS: Connor's gone there!!?
CORDY: Following in his daddy's footsteps. In more ways than one.
ANGELUS: Very funny. When?
CORDY: Tonight. 9:32. In Griffith Park.
ANGELUS: Connor and Buffy and me. Think of the possibilities.
CORDY: Here's my favorite: you come home and hand me Buffy's head on a platter. Do whatever you want with the rest of her.
ANGELUS: Why was she beating him up?
CORDY: I don't know. But the vision told me this: She doesn't know who Connor is. And he is not aware of the fact that Buffy knows you.
ANGELUS: She doesn't know he's mine. And he doesn't know she's mine. This will be fun.
CORDY: What do you say?
ANGELUS: Oh, right. Thank you master. You have visions. I kill things. This is just like old times. So much to do. What time is sunset? I've forgotten.
CORDY: 7:02.
ANGELUS: Which gives me plenty of time to play.
CORDY: Ladies. The money. [holds out her hand. They scowl, but Val tosses it to her] Thank you. Now I can spend it all on my darling boy. See you again in a few hours, killer.
ANGELUS: Could you do something for me?
CORDY: Depends.
ANGELUS: Get the ax.
CORDY: [smiles] I like where this is going.
ANGELUS: Olivia, get over here, front and center. On your knees. [she obeys and looks up at him. He caresses her hair and face. She smiles.] You were always very good on your knees. But not so skilled on your feet. I'm sorry. You just didn't work out.
Olivia looks devastated. Cordy stands behind her. She smiles and swings the ax, beheading Olivia.
CORDY: Glad I could help.
She puts the ax back and leaves. Angelus turns and looks at his three remaining consorts, who stand up.
ANGELUS: You never can tell. Most can't make the transition. A guy's lucky to sire a single good one. Imagine how lucky I was to sire you three. It's 11 am. I've got time to kill.
Val kisses him on the lips. Tina nibbles on his left ear. Alanna, a redhead with a dancer's body who's wearing a light blue dress with black stockings, wraps her legs around Angelus's waist and bends back while still holding on.
ANGELUS: You're right. I should spend some time at home.
A little after 10 in the morning, Connor walks into Spike's crypt. As he goes by Spike's bed, Spike reaches up with his left hand and grabs Connor's right arm. Spike opens his eyes.
SPIKE: Not as sneaky as usual.
CONNOR: Wasn't trying.
SPIKE: What do you want? I was trying to sleep.
Connor holds up a bag.
CONNOR: Brought breakfast. A quart.
SPIKE: Yours? [Spike smiles. Connor looks scared] Kidding.
CONNOR: Pig's blood.
SPIKE: Why so friendly?
CONNOR: Thought you could use it after last night.
SPIKE: That was oddly thoughtful of you.
Spike gets out of bed. He's wearing boxers but nothing else. He puts some clothes on, takes the blood and is about to drink it. Then he has his doubts.
SPIKE: Are you trying to poison me?
CONNOR: You can poison a vampire? (something to consider for daddy) You were very brave last night. Went into the belly of the beast. Something even I haven't tried.
SPIKE: Well, you're young. Give it time.
CONNOR: Last night. Fighting the Turam. I did what you taught me. Anticipating. It helped.
SPIKE: That's nice. [finishes drinking the blood] Thanks for the snack. Can we do this later, after I get some more shut eye?
CONNOR: Cool. Later. [leaves]
SPIKE: Does he think I'm his bleeding Watcher?
Connor runs over to Wood's house, a nice three-story Queen Anne Victorian. He's cooking.
WOOD: These are for Buffy and me. Don't touch. I've heard how voracious you can be.
CONNOR: I just saw Spike. He's still hurting. This is the time. Are you ready?
WOOD: Been ready my whole life.
CONNOR: I can do more.
WOOD: This is my fight. But you'll be doing plenty.
CONNOR: He's nice. As vampires go. And funny. But it's just a mask. He'll go evil again, show his true face. I'm sure of that.
Obviously he's transferring. Except for the funny part. Angel wasn't a joker.
WOOD: You know why I have to do it alone.
CONNOR: He killed your mother. She was a Slayer. Like Buffy.
WOOD: You probably would have liked her a lot more than you like Buffy. [Connor laughs]
CONNOR: Than why does Buffy protect him?
WOOD: Because she's scared.
CONNOR: Of Spike?
WOOD: Of the First. She wants all the fighters she can get. No matter the risk.
CONNOR: Spike can be replaced.
It's a little after 2 pm. Buffy has finished brunch with Robin. She is walking through the graveyard with Giles.
GILES: I've seen what the Potentials did to those Bringers, and I understand your concern. But I don't share your fears.
BUFFY: You're happy with what the girls did?
GILES: No. But I understand their actions. They've been terrorized. They acted, and overreacted, out of fear. When you are afraid for you life, and you've got the enemy down, you make sure he stays down. Those young women aren't Slayers. Not yet. Compared to you they're powerless. And that is how the powerless react when they band together to defend themselves against a mortal threat.
BUFFY: Disemboweling is nothing to worry about?
GILES: It's not bloodlust. Not in the way we've seen it in Faith and Willow and, so far as I can tell, in Connor.
BUFFY: So you're worried about him?
GILES: Are you?
BUFFY: Less than before last night. He seems to respect me now.
GILES: Because he learned the limits of his power. He fought something he could not defeat alone. He had to rely on you to survive. I dare say he was chastened by the whole experience.
BUFFY: He did learn to follow orders. But the amount of pounding he took was disturbing. He's unbreakable. Compared to him, even I'm fragile.
GILES: Connor is stronger than you?
BUFFY: No! He's just better at taking abuse. He's also not as good at avoiding abuse. Like he's missing that part of his brain which tells us pain is bad.
They enter Spike's crypt. Spike is sitting in a chair, smoking, listening to Elvis Costello's "The Imposter:"
"This is your big decision.
Hope you're not disappointed.
He's got double vision
when you want him double jointed
and he's not the man you'd think that he can be.
He'll only bring you souvenirs.
It's only gonna end in tears.
And he is only the imposter."
Spikes notices his visitors. Buffy holds out a large cup.
BUFFY: I brought blood. Thought you could use it.
SPIKE: I seem to be very popular today.
Buffy walks up to Spike, puts her hand to his face.
BUFFY: How are you? Are you hurt bad?
He pulls up his shirt to show the puncture wounds. She looks concerned and puts her fingers to a few of them. He pulls down his shirt.
SPIKE: They'll heal. What doesn't kill me —
GILES: Only makes you stronger?
SPIKE: No. [laughs] Is nothing for you sad sacks to worry about. I'm fine.
BUFFY: Why are you doing this?
SPIKE: Doing what?
GILES: Let me suggest that you do this when I'm gone and don't have to listen to it. Spike, can you tell us what happened last night?
SPIKE: Told you already. Stabbed it in the heart.
GILES: Could you elaborate, since that explanation is, well, hard to reconcile with everything I've read about this creature.
SPIKE: I go to the bottom, below all the sets of teeth, and there's a floor. I cut through the floor and fall into the heart. Very large. Pumps blood. Good-tasting blood, I might add. Not demon blood. I stab through the bottom of the heart, I hit dirt. The demon dies. End of story. You kill it by getting beneath it.
GILES: Then why do the sources all say you kill it by beheading it?
SPIKE: Simple. The bloke who killed it didn't live to tell the tale. Buffy saw how fast the ground closed up. Guy on the inside doesn't make it out, people on the surface assume they killed it.
GILES: Interesting. Since below the monster is the actual Hellmouth. So by stabbing below the monster before it had risen, you literally stabbed the Hellmouth itself during the critical period. I suppose that makes sense.
SPIKE: Have you talked to Robin? Pretty sure he understood.
GILES: Yes, I did. He explained that he was trying to get to the bottom, although he wasn't able to see precisely what you did at the end.
SPIKE: We were making it up as we went along. Shared intuition, I suppose.
GILES: And since you two were the ones who fought the hellbeast the longest, it's natural that you would have the best understanding of what needed to be done. Thank you, anyway. I'll go now. [heads outside]
SPIKE: You were saying?
BUFFY: What is your problem?
SPIKE: What am I to you?
BUFFY: Don't do this now.
SPIKE: I was trying not to, but you keep forcing the situation. Thought maybe giving you some space would help. But it's just made you worse. Do you even know why you want me around?
BUFFY: I care about you, Spike.
SPIKE: I know. I'm your great project of reform and you've grown accustomed to my face.
Buffy misses the Pygmalion/My Fair Lady allusion.
BUFFY: I love you.
Spike pauses for a few seconds.
SPIKE: But not the way I love you.
BUFFY: God!! It's just never enough with you! You always have to make everything difficult.
SPIKE: I'm trying to make it easy. We do it your way, we're both going to be disappointed. These things are all or nothing. Besides, I'll be dead before too long. Best if we don't get too attached.
Buffy looks concerned.
BUFFY: Spike, is there something you know that you're not telling me?
SPIKE: Just intuition. Like last night. When you make a deal with a demon, there's always a catch. I think I know what it was. By giving me a soul, he was killing me. He was making me care enough to die for you. This time, things will turn out right. I'll die and you'll live.
BUFFY: And you base this on what — your big imaginary hero fantasy?
SPIKE: You think I want this? I made a choice, and I've accepted the consequences. Always knew you'd be the death of me. Who woulda thought I'd go fighting for you?
BUFFY: Since when did a soul come with a death wish?
SPIKE: You expected a happy ending?
She remembers this is what he said in her dream the other night right before he killed her. Buffy looks very upset and leaves. Part of her thinks Spike is playing mind games and trying to make her feel guilty for not paying more attention to her. Part of her fears he may be right.
GILES: How is he?
BUFFY: Martyr complex.
GILES: Figures.
BUFFY: Have you researched that demon who gave him his soul?
GILES: No. Why? You think there's a curse? A loophole?
BUFFY: A catch. Something. This demon had to have a reason.
GILES: You fear Spike might be a danger to us?
BUFFY: No. It's not that. I just want to know why he gave it to him.
Lindsey walks into the room where Gunn, Wes and Fred are.
LINDSEY: I've got something for you. Someone.
A women enters. Late-20s. Blonde. Good-looking.
LINDSEY: This is Kelly.
KELLY: I'm the bait.
LINDSEY: For Angelus. Kelly's a pro, so she can handle herself.
Wesley smiles and chuckles as he looks at her.
WESLEY: Hats off. You've really done your homework on this one.
FRED: So Angelus goes out, we find him and send Kelly to meet him.
GUNN: He tries to kill her. She runs away. Angelus chases, and runs right into our trap.
LINDSEY: Couldn't have said it better myself.
KELLY: I'm gonna go grab a bite. Beep me if anything happens. [she leaves]
FRED: Angel likes blondes? I know about Darla, but what about Cordy? Where does she fit in?
WES: That's always been a very vexing question. I'm sure he'll bite, although Kelly is about 10 years too old.
LINDSEY: I couldn't find an 18 year-old who could do the job without getting killed.
WES: Of course. But is that all? We ambush him, then what?
GUNN: We pound him.
WES: Angelus is crafty. He would escape. The basic plan is sound, but we need to work on the execution. Angelus has to be kept in the dark until he is too weakened to elude us. We must think on his tactical level. He won't expect us to try and outsmart him. Hubris is his cardinal weakness. We have to ask ourselves, what would Napoleon do? That's it!
An hour after Buffy left, Connor returned to Spike's crypt. Spike was watching "The Great Escape" on the tele with the sound off and listening to Patti Smith's "Gloria:"
"Jesus died for somebody's sins but not mine.
Meltin' in a pot of thieves.
Wild card up my sleeve.
Thick heart of stone,
my sins my own,
they belong to me, me."
SPIKE: You again. What now? You want to train?
CONNOR: No. Just talk. [sits down in a chair]
SPIKE: Didn't know you were capable of just talking.
CONNOR: Why do you joke?
SPIKE: Instead of what? Brooding? [smiles slyly. Connor thinks Spike's on to him.] Laugh lines look better than worry lines.
CONNOR: Don't you feel guilty?
SPIKE: That's why I laugh. Humor comes from pain. Part of the human condition.
CONNOR: You're not human.
SPIKE: Doesn't mean I can't try. I'm obviously trying a lot harder than you.
CONNOR: [nervously] I'm not a demon.
SPIKE: Which means it should be easier for you.
Connor walks over to Spike's shelf and puts a book back.
CONNOR: I finished it.
SPIKE: Nietzsche? What did you think of him?
CONNOR: He says it's all about power. That's what the Devil wants you to think.
SPIKE You think Nietzsche's evil?
CONNOR: He's been tricked into believing a lie.
Like Connor in the past. But Connor isn't yet that self-aware.
SPIKE: No, he says everyone else has been tricked into believing good and evil exist. He's saying that the strong have always dominated the weak, and once we accept that we'll be better off.
CONNOR: He says the strong are different, that they don't have to live by the same rules everyone else does.
SPIKE: Because they can get away with it. Doesn't mean they should. Everyone who reads him sees what they want. That's why the bloke's so bloody popular.
CONNOR: What does he mean by Supermen? Is that like me? Or vampires? Or demons?
SPIKE: You think you're the Uber-mensch? That's funny. No. It's frightening, actually. Considering you are, well . . . [Spike takes a big gulp of blood and then a bigger gulp of vodka] He's being metaphorical. Greek Gods and all that. Like Yeats and his "Second Coming." "Things fall apart, the center cannot hold . . . slouching towards Bethlehem." Everyone reads it wrong. Miracle child born in the year 2000. People think it's the end of the world, but it's a new beginning. Mystic pagan stuff. You'd be amazed by the loopy things smart people believed back then. Fairies and ghost flowers and the like. Too many rich people with too much time on their hands. You weren't born in the year 2000, were you?
Spike laughs. Connor feels very, very nervous.
CONNOR: No. Who was the miracle child supposed to be?
SPIKE: The Anti-Christ. [good thing Connor's sitting down, or else he would have fainted] But Yeats and Nietzsche were not very pro-Christ. They hated him. Thought he made humans too touchy-feely and took away their animal instincts. So in their minds the Anti-Christ was a hero. Like Oedipus. [Connor needs air] Yeats also said Oedipus was the Anti-Christ, but in a good way. But Yeats was a stupid git. All great poets are idiots when it comes to real life (Spike finds some good spin for his lousy poetry). Same with philosophers. You can't take em seriously. [Connor starts to breathe again]
SPIKE: You look a little flush. Want something to drink?
CONNOR: Why would I want blood? [still more identity issues.]
SPIKE: Or this. Some grape soda Clem left behind. [pulls the can out of the fridge, tosses it to Connor. He opens it and drinks. It's sweet. He likes that.] Cheers.
Spike downs some wine. Connor looks confused. He was supposed to make Spike nervous, not the other way around.
CONNOR: What's different? After getting the soul. How do you feel different than before?
SPIKE: Well. There's the guilt. But you could have guessed that. Waves of tsunamis of memories of the lives you've destroyed.
CONNOR: Like the Slayers? Dawn told me you killed two.
SPIKE: Not them. [Connor's back to hating Spike] That's battle. No guilt in battle. We're each trying to kill the other. It's fair. And if it wasn't me, woulda been some other vamp. Not like I robbed them of a long life. But everyone else, I feel them inside. With them, it was murder. Their deaths make me feel like I don't deserve to live.
Connor thinks it's almost like Spike is asking to be killed.
CONNOR: Why don't you kill yourself?
SPIKE: Suicide's the one mortal sin you can't be forgiven for. [puts Holtz in a bad light] It's cowardice. You believe in God, Connor?
CONNOR: Of course.
SPIKE: God gives you a soul to use it. You kill yourself, it's like spitting in the Almighty's face. So I use it. Don't see any other option. [smiles and chuckles to himself] No, there is another option. I could feel sorry for myself and do nothing to help anyone for, I don't know, a century. But that's just selfish and lazy and contemptuous. Like wanking in your Savior's eye.
Connor doesn't know about Angel's long period of inactivity. When he does, Spike's imagery will be most disturbing.
CONNOR: Sounds like a coward.
Connor knows no one like that. Angel was a Champion. Spike smiles. He doesn't know he's just attempted to discredit the two most important men in Connor's life.
SPIKE: It does. But let me try to give you some insight. [Goes over to his cd's. Pulls out the Sex Pistol's "Never Mind the Bollocks" and the Clash's "London Calling." Tosses them to Connor.] Before I had a soul, I liked the Pistols a lot better. Now that I've got one, I'm starting to prefer the Clash. Listen to them. You'll understand. And you'll also hear some pretty great music, something I gather you're not too familiar with. Do you even have a player?
CONNOR: For these? Yeah.
SPIKE: Then I bet you also have a tele.
CONNOR: Huh?
SPIKE: Television.
CONNOR: Yeah.
SPIKE: And cable.
CONNOR: What's that?
SPIKE: Sounds like you still have a few things to learn about scavenging.
CONNOR: I know my place is better than your place. [he leaves]
GUNN: You know somethin'. That ain't half bad.
WES: Not half bad? It's brilliant!
FRED: It's clever. But Wes, let's not go overboard.
LINDSEY: I like it. I knew you guys would fine-tune the plan.
Kelly walks into Faith's room. Faith looks suspiciously at the new face.
KELLY: So you're the Slayer. Wow. What an honor. I'm Kelly. I'm a demon fighter. Not like you, of course.
Faith looks her over.
FAITH: Are you the bait?
KELLY: Yep.
FAITH: Trust me. With you, he'll bite. I mean, he'll fall for it. You're his type.
KELLY: That's what everyone keeps saying. So he has a blonde fetish?
FAITH: Oh yeah. More of an obsession. I like your style, Kelly. Used to play the victim myself when I was hunting. Make the vampires come to me. Wait till they're about to bite, then take em out. Easier than runnin' em down. And way more fun. The look in their eyes when they realize they've been had.
Cordy walks into the Hyperion at 5 pm. The place is crowded with vampires and their prospective victims. She looks at the vamps like they are vermin. As she saunters through the lobby, they all get out of her way, creating a ten-foot wide alley for her to walk down. She goes to the elevator and looks inside. Seven vampires run out. She gives them a disdainful half-smile and gets in the elevator alone, pushing the button for the fifth floor.
Angelus is in his room doing things with Alanna, Val and Tina that might make Caligula blush. There are a couple drained corpses chained to the wall, remnants of earlier exertions. In his head he hears Cordy yell "I'M COMING!!!" He gets up off the bed, grabs his pants, puts one leg in, and goes out the door, trying to get his other leg in. Cordy walks up to him. She does not look amused.
CORDY: Is this how we prepare for our big night?
She looks into the room and glares at Alanna, Val and Tina, who of course are all still naked. They grab their clothes and run out into the hallway. Angelus goes back into his room. Cordy follows him inside, ready to scold. She closes the door. Angelus takes his pants off.
ANGELUS: These aren't the ones I'm gonna wear.
Cordy looks over naked Angelus.
CORDY: Trying to make me forget how mad I am at you?
ANGELUS: Is it working?
Gives her his trademark smirk. Cordy smiles, something she hasn't done much of lately.
CORDY: Of course! I mean, this is me you're talking to. But get dressed. I have a surprise for you.
ANGELUS: Something you can't give me while I'm naked? [she slaps him]
CORDY: You're walking on thin ice, mister. Just be sure not to drive on it.
Holds up car keys. Angelus can see from red horse on the key chain that it's for a Mustang. He gets very excited.
ANGELUS: The new Mustang?
CORDY: Way better.
He runs outside and sees it at the curb. He's a happy puppy.
CORDY: Mint condition, red, 1965 convertible. Darkly-tinted windows, so the sun won't be a problem. Aren't I the best? You know how to repay me.
Where do you think blondie's head will look best? On my bureau, or my nighstand?
ANGELUS: I'd put it on the dinner table. Makes an eye-catching centerpiece.
CORDY: You always know what a girl wants, even when she doesn't. [runs her right hand along his face, and her left hand down his chest] Make me proud.
Cordy puts the keys in Angelus's pocket and leaves. Angelus gets in the car and starts up his new toy.
Kelly's beeper starts beeping.
KELLY: It's time.
Kelly and Faith go into the main room, where Lindsey, Gunn, Fred and Wes already are.
GUNN: He's got wheels. No vamp can run that fast.
LINDSEY: Heading due west on I-10. Stays on the loop at downtown. Continuing west on the highway. Doesn't make sense.
WES: Angelus would take the local roads.
FRED: If he was hunting.
LINDSEY: He's leaving the city limits.
Lorne shows up.
WES: How far out does the darkness extend?
FRED: All of the county, at least.
GUNN: Ain't in the suburbs. Orange County hasn't had any problems.
LORNE: And people are still sunbathing in Ventura.
A few minutes later, they lose Angeles.
WES: What happened?
GUNN: Did he ditch the bug?
LINDSEY: It only works within a 30 kilometer radius. He's out of range.
FRED: Why would Angeles leave LA? Why would he go where it's sunny?
WES: Maybe he's bored.
LINDSEY: What's west of here? Nothing. San Benardino. The Mojave Desert.
GUNN: Vegas!
FRED: Ya think he's goin' back?
FAITH: Sin City? Everyone stays indoors. No one asks questions. If I were evil —
LORNE: For Angelus Vegas would be like Disneyland.
KELLY: This mean he's no longer our problem?
LINDSEY: For the time being. You'll get beeped when he's back within range. In the meantime —
WES: We exploit his absence.
Gwen shows up.
GWEN: Did I miss anything? And who's the new girl?
GUNN: Angelus skipped town.
GWEN: Bummer. No, wait. Good.
LINDSEY: While he's gone, I'd like to get a sense of what's happening at the hotel. How many vampires are there. How much of a threat they pose. Anyone available for some breaking and entering?
GWEN: I read ya, chief.
LORNE: I should also go. Not because I'm good at this sorta thing, but because I can't be hurt in there. The barrier against demon violence.
LINDSEY: That okay, Gwen?
GWEN: Sure. I'll use the Chiquita banana as a decoy.
WES: I can take Faith out patrolling.
KELLY: Can I come? [Wes smiles. Kelly's cute.] I can hold my own and I'd like to see a Slayer in action.
FAITH: Me. And Wes. And a blonde tagging along. Just like old times.
GUNN: I can check out some of my contacts. See what they know.
FRED: I'll go with Charles. See if I can find any texts on what the Master's big plans might be.
LINDSEY: This is why I love working with talent. If the people and Wolfram & Hart were half as good as you guys, you would all have been dead a long time ago. [Wes, Gunn and Fred don't get the joke. Faith kind of gets it.]
When Angelus gets to I-210 in Pomona, he quickly turns south. This is to make sure no one's tailing him. He takes 60, 57, 91 and 55 south and west to Santa Ana, where he hops on I-5 and goes south on that that highway until he hits Sunnydale. He's going about 120 most of the way, so he arrives an hour before sunset. He takes a scenic detour east on 78 through the desert and arrives back in town a few minutes before it's time. He pays a visit to his old home. He stands in the great hall and starts sniffing around. Then a big smile comes across his face.
ANGELUS: Thanks for keeping my house warm, sonny boy. Daddy's got quite a surprise for you.
By then, Connor had left an hour ago for Wood's house. They are in the basement, training.
CONNOR: He'll expect you to lead. He likes to counter-attack.
WOOD: He won't expect anything.
CONNOR: So you just rely on surprise?
WOOD: And skill. And desire. I want him dead. I'll find a way.
CONNOR: Don't attack while he's down. He likes that. Let him get up.
WOOD: Always planned to stake him on his feet. Don't interfere.
CONNOR: I know. Keep Buffy busy.
WOOD: It's for her own good.
CONNOR: [scornfully] I'm the diversion.
WOOD: You're the one who makes it possible. Without you, Buffy stops me, I never get another chance.
CONNOR: I'll make sure nothing stops you.