.....

In the girls' dressing room

Miaka: Oh, Tamahome has gotten so ANNOYING lately, Yui!!!

Yui: Oh, Tamahome has gotten so ANNOYING lately, Yui!!!

Miaka: What the heck-

Yui: What the heck-

Miaka: YUI STOP!

Yui: YUI STOP!

Miaka: Yui is a stupid *******

Yui: Miaka is a stupid *******

Miaka: YUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!

Yui: YUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!

......

Soi: Don't think you've escaped , toadies of Suzaku! You'll die before you reach Bei-Jia!

Tasuki: Did you just call me a TOADIE?

Soi: Yes, I believe I did

Tasuki: LISTEN WOMAN, I AIN'T NO TOADIE

Soi: Okay then fine, Tamahome is a toadie

Tasuki: Yeah.....y'know.....you're right about that....

.....

Chichiri: I think the worst part about working here on the crew was having to say "no da" after every stupid little sentence. I mean...COME ON!! GIMME A BREAK!! I can't remember to say that all the time!! It gives me such a headache, too!! I mean...YOU TRY DOING IT!! And it's not like I got a RAISE because I had an extra two words after every sentence...NOOOOO........Nuriko had to get the RAISE because he DIED. WELL NYA NYA NYA I DON'T CARE ANYMORE BECAUSE YOU'RE ALL *************!!!

.....

Mitsukake: Normally I don't talk. I think it's a wonder they got me to talk at all on the set. I'm very camera shy....okay...I'm going now...

.....

Miaka: Tamahome...

Tamahome: Tamahome...

Miaka: What, are you in love with yourself now??

Tamahome: What, are you in love with yourself now??

Miaka: TAMAHOME CUT THAT OUT!!

Tamahome: TAMAHOME CUT THAT OUT!!

Miaka: WHY IS EVERYONE COPYING ME?!!? WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA??

Tamahome: WHY IS EVERYONE COPYING ME?!!? WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA??

Director: TAMAHOME, STICK TO THE SCRIPT!

Miaka: My love for you is so strong , it hurts!

Tamahome: My love for you is so strong, it hurts!

Miaka: TAMAAAAAAAAAAHOOOMEEEE!!

.....

Hotohori: I wonder how far Miaka and the others have advanced. I pray for their safe passage to Bei-Jia....yet I feel a little uneasy.........must've been the 8 burritos I had earlier...

.....

Miaka: Tamahome!! Did you see? That was my first...battle...

Chiriko: Well whoop dee doo let's just have a big party for YOU. Oh lookie you hurt Soi....well wa wa wa...no one throws a party for me when I STAB MYSELF TO DEATH......WHO CARES ABOUT YOU AND YOUR BATTLES, MIAKA?! HUH?

.....

Miaka: He can't be dead. It's all WRONG!! Nuriko, open your eyes!! DAMMIT NURIKO OPEN YOUR EYES!!

Director: CUT!!

Nuriko: *gets up* *stretches* Ahhhh okay that was great. Now, help me get this ketchup off.

Miaka: Tamahome, did you hear?? I SWORE ON THE SET!!

Tamahome: Tamahome, did you hear?? I SWORE ON THE SET!!

Miaka: .....YOU IDIOT!

.....

Gang leader: Sell me the girl! I'll give you a full 30 gold ryo for her!

Tamahome: Oooo what a bargain!!! Here you go!!

Miaka: *dragged away* TAMAHOME YOU IDIOT!!

.....

Yui: Keisuke! I just got off the phone with your mother! Did Miaka REALLY run away?

Keisuke: Yep!! I can't believe it!! I'm gonna use her room as storage!! Finally, SHE'S GONE!