Sesshoumaru's World Conquest in a Day

Chapter 4 The Italian Stallion

4:30am

Inuyasha: I think I'm dying.

Sango: Don't be stupid. You're just not feeling well because you've never had a bath before.

Miroku: Inuyasha, if you do die, I will do everything I can to comfort Kagome in her loss, including being a shoulder to cry on, a friend with benefits, a boy toy, and so on, because that's the wonderful type of friend I am.

Inuyasha: Ya know, I'm suddenly feeling a hell lot better.

Miroku: Oh. *smacks him on head* DIE ALREADY!!!!

Kagome: *yawn* I'm getting sleepy.

Miroku: May I be of assistance as a large sized teddy bear?

Kagome: No thank you, but thanks for offering. I'm glad atleast SOMEBODY cares. *silence* ahem, SOMEBODY CARES.... *more silence* INUYASHA!!!

Inuyasha: Whatcha want?

Kagome: You're so dense!

Inuyasha: What happened to your being sleepy?

Kagome: You still don't get it!

Inuyasha: Oh please just shut up and go to sleep!

Kagome: Know what, fine! We're through! I'm going out with Miroku now because he actually cares about me!

Miroku: Not really. I just think you have a hot ass.

Kagome: .....

Inuyasha: Really? What caught me was the chest. Man, for a ninth grader, YEEHAW!

Kagome: I can't believe you guys have been sizing me up this whole time!

Miroku: Speaking of which, did Kikyo have big boobs? I couldn't tell through the kimono she was wearing.

Inuyasha: I'm afraid that has always been an enigma to me, cuz whenever I tried looking down her shirt, she'd curse me or something.

Miroku: Damn, that sucks.

Inuyasha: I know.

Kagome: Shut up! I'm trying to sleep!

Inuyasha: Who cares?!

Miroku: Hey, let's go to a strip joint and get a lap dance or two.

Inuyasha: OK.

Shippo: DANCE DANCE DESTROY!!!

Sango: I'll go with you, too, so that you don't do something naughty like talk to strangers.

Inuyasha: Fair enough.

Kagome: I can't believe they're leaving without me. Well, fine! I'll be okay on my own. I'll just keep myself cozy in this here dumpster and have the best sleep ever!

Down in the bag of Gummy Bears

Red Gummy: Finally, the tyrant is fading!

Blue Gummy: Now divine justice shall be served!

Red Gummy: Prepare the butter knife!

Orange Gummy: We are ready to invade!

Red Gummy: Ready yourselves, for this will be a long, agonizing battle. Bloody and cruel, we shall fall in numbers, but by our faith and vengence, we shall be victorious! I will say to you, not all of you will be coming back alive, but by your willingness to fight for our cause, you do not only fight for this bag of Gummy Bears, but for all the bags of Gummy Bears all over the world! And for them we say 'Vive le Libate!"

Green Gummy: Um.. sir... you're speaking French now... badly butchered French at that. Shouldn't you say something in the native tongue of our homeland Germany?

Red Gummy: Normally I would, but the author only knows one German word so... 'Gutentaghe!'

Green Gummy: Spelled wrong, but that works.

In the dumpster...

Kagome: I'm so tired....

Voice: Do not fall asleep!!!!

Kagome: Who said that? *stands up* What?!

Super Hero: If you fall asleep, the gummy bears shall kill you!

Kagome: Um... Hojo, why are you wearing a sheet and tights?

Hojo: Err... I don't know of this Hojo whom you speak. I am none other than the caped enjineer of righteousness! My name is none other than... The Italian Stallion!

Kagome: Huh?! But you're Japanese!

Hojo: We'll just ignore that factor for the time being. Wait, how would you know what and what not I am?!

Kagome: Cuz yer my classmate

Hojo: No! I am not this Hojo person! I am from the European continent, in a place known as Italy!

Kagome: ...But you had just said you were actually Japanese.

Hojo: Don't try to twist my words! *jumps into dumpster* Now then, young damsel, let me whisk you away from this place of vile stinkiness to somewhere of more luscious fragrance and laundry detergeant.

Kagome: Okay!

In the bag...

Green Gummy: Oh no! We are being thwarted!

Red Gummy: Curse you Italian Stallion!

Orange Gummy: Oh well. There will be other nights! Just wait, and we will kill her!

Gummys: MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Outside...

Italian Stallion: Onto the rooftops, my lady, to where the stars await us!

Kagome: Coming! *falls* AAAGGHHH!!!

Italian Stallion: Oh no! My love has fallen from the roof tops, and has plunged to a very messy, bloody death! Oh, what horrid sorrow. The gummy bears, the CURSED GUMMY BEARS!!!! They are responsible for the death of my love! For this foul treachery, I shall punish you all!

Gummy Bears...

Gummys: Ah shit.

Italian Stallion...

Italian Stallion: *eats gummy bears* Now that you have suffered the consequences, I shall disappear into the shadows of the night and fight for justice, hoping that one day in the afterlife, I will be reunited with my love once more.

Sesshoumaru: Hey you!

Italian Stallion: You are?

Sesshoumaru: I'm a demon trying to take over the world. If you're gonna be trying to save the planet, then I'm afraid I'll have to kill you.

Italian Stallion: I see. Normally, I might try to beg to be your lacky, but, considering the circumstances, I am not afraid of dying for justice.

Sesshoumaru: If that's your choice.... you must die.

Italian Stallion: No, not until another night. Until then, I must bid you farewell! *jumps into his Pinto and drives off*

Sesshoumaru: It seems that I have a new arch nemesis.

Meanwhile...

Inuyasha: I can't believe we got kicked out of that bar!

Miroku: Well sorry if I find it hard to restrain myself.

Sango: I swear, you're such a dirty pervert.

Shippo: PERVERT PERVERT PERVERT KKKIIILLLLL!!!!!!!

Miroku: Ah shaddup.

Inuyasha: Hey, where's Kagome?

Miroku: I dunno.

Inuyasha: *shrugs* Oh well, let's go find Sesshoumaru!

Voice: Be warned, if you seek evil, you will find evil!

Sango: No shit.

Inuyasha: Who are you?!

Italian Stallion: I am the defender of righteousness and all that's good. I am... The Italian Stallion!

Miroku: What's with the bed sheet and the tights?

Inuyasha: It looks... so cool.

Italian Stallion: I will fight against my new enemy Sesshoumaru, so don't fret, oh beginning groupie. Now, I must away! *jumps back into his Pinto*

Inuyasha: The Italian Stallion.... Wow... He's my new hero!

Miroku: You are easily impressed.

Inuyasha: We must help the Italian Stallion! C'mon let's find Sesshoumaru!

5:02 am

Another chapter ended. Sesshoumaru had second to no lines... oh well. Next chapter, he'll have plenty of speaking to do. I don't feel like saying what the next chapter is about, cuz I'm lazy. It will be installed sometime, when I get around to writing it. Till then!