AN: Okay, this is definitely going to be a fun chapter! It's time for the head of household/food competition, and man, does big brother have plans for our boys…let's just say they're going to get * closer * to each other than they ever wanted to.
Snitch
"Hello, house guests."
We were sitting in the backyard, and we had been waiting on Sarah to greet us and usher us into this week's food competition. We were a bit nervous, because set up in the middle of the backyard was a huge red mat, and at one end of the mat sat two large tables, a bench, and two small chairs, all piled on top of one another. That couldn't be good.
"This week's food competition is what we call the pit of lava."
Oh, great. That was never good.
"The only way you can cross the mat is by climbing across the furniture. However, as you can see, the furniture is not lined up across the mat."
Yep. We could see that. It had to be at least 75 feet to the other side.
"The grass is the only safety. You can, under no circumstances, touch the mat or you will die and you will lose the competition. In order to get across, you must have someone jump onto the furniture from the grass and start lining it up- without touching the mat. Others can join at any time."
Sounded easy enough. We'd tell the first person where to start, and once they got started, we could start adding more people.
"But there is a catch."
Oh, shit. I saw Skittery roll his eyes, and I couldn't blame him.
"You cannot speak, or make any kind of noise. You may only gesture."
She let this sink in, and I realized that my plan had been blown. We wouldn't be able to 'say' which way things should go. But this should still be simple enough, right?
"I have an order that you must go in. If the order is changed before you get onto the furniture, then you will lose. You may change the order once you are on the furniture. The order is: Mush, Skittery, Specs, Racetrack, Snitch, Spot, Bumlets, Cowboy, Blink, Itey, and last will be Dutchy. Please line up in that order now."
We quickly lined up in the order she named, and I looked at Spot and Racetrack and saw the confidence in their eyes. There was no way we could mess this up.
"Also, as another twist, on your way across I will be negotiating and offering deals to various house members. I cannot elaborate on those quite yet. Are there any questions?"
We looked around at each other, and no one said anything. We were all eager to get started.
"No questions? Then let's begin."
Mush climbed up onto the furniture with a little help from Skittery, and our little game of charades began. He pointed to one of the benches and we all nodded. He grabbed it and dragged it out of the pile, pushing it out in front and stepping onto it. He then pulled one of the chairs to the front, and reached out his hand to help Skittery up.
I realized the mistake they were about to make- we should save the table for a little later, since the two tables were the biggest pieces. But there was no way I could tell them, and they pushed it to the front, and Specs and Racetrack jumped onto the chain of furniture.
It was all working fine until we realized that Itey and Dutchy still had yet to get on, and we couldn't move people forward any further- the furniture up front was full. But we had to empty one of the back pieces in order to move it to the front and continue our slow progression. I motioned that even though Mush was on a very small chair up front, Skittery needed to get on it with him in order to make some room in the back.
Skittery didn't look too happy about it, but he stepped onto the chair- and almost fell over backwards in his reluctance to get that close to Mush. The rest of us were either snickering or terrified as Mush locked his arms around Skittery's waist and pulled him as close as he could get in order to keep their balance. It would've been quite funny to see them like that if our diet for the next week didn't depend on them staying like that.
Suddenly I realized just what had to be done- if we didn't pack everyone that close to each other, there was no way we were going to be able to get across. This whole thing was depending on the physical contact- how close we were willing to get.
I gently pushed Racetrack a whole lot closer to Specs- their faces couldn't have been an inch apart- and I helped Spot jump onto the bench with us, pulling him forward until he was pressed up against me and then motioning for Bumlets to come on over. It was an extremely crowded bench by the time we were done, but now Itey and Dutchy had room to step onto the last piece.
Then Blink got a brilliant idea- he laid down facedown on the bench he was sharing with Dutchy and Itey, forcing them to put a foot on either side of him- and then reached out and grabbed onto the table in front of them, pulling their bench past it towards the front. The people from the other pieces of furniture began to help push it along, and eventually, it was at the front.
"Stop."
We all stopped what we were doing as Blink stood back up, and waited for Sarah to tell us why she had made us halt our progress. It was a bad time to do so- I wasn't enjoying being this close to these people, and I could tell that no one else did.
"Racetrack. Time for a deal."
Racetrack looked up from where he had been studying the line of furniture, and I could tell he wasn't happy about being picked for the first 'deal'.
"You can either choose to sacrifice one of the houseguests to the fire without losing the competition in doing so, or you can choose to get rid of one piece of furniture. You have ten seconds."
Racetrack looked around at us, but even though we couldn't say anything, he knew what we would want him to do- get rid of a person.
"What is your decision? You may speak."
Racetrack took one more good look at everyone. "I choose to sacrifice Bumlets."
"Very well. Bumlets, fall into the fire."
Bumlets smiled and jumped off the furniture, stepping back over into the grass. Now our bench was much less crowded.
"House guests, you may continue."
Getting rid of a person seemed like a blessing for now, but I had the feeling that Sarah had something up her sleeve for later. You never get something for nothing, and we were only halfway across.
Blink, who was now third from the front with Itey leading, offered Mush a hand and pulled him onto the front bench, and Skittery heaved a sigh of relief, but he only had a few seconds of freedom before Specs was forced to jump across and he ended up in the same position as before to avoid falling. Room was quickly made on the front bench, and Skittery literally lifted Specs across- he had a lot more strength than what he may seem to have.
Racetrack stepped across and into Skittery's arms- I almost felt sorry for Skittery now. It seemed to have been silently decided that he would help everyone behind him and then take up the rear.
The chair in the back was empty now- but with our luck, it didn't do any good.
"Stop. Bumlets, remove the chair in the back and then step up to the next table with Cowboy. I am officially resurrecting you." Sarah said, and we could tell just from her voice that she was grinning.
Oh, for heaven's sake…that wasn't fair! Now we'd have to definitely squeeze in order to make it across. And it wasn't looking good as it was.
Mush
We were stuck. Every piece of furniture had lots of people on it, and we needed to have minimal people on it in order to make it light enough to move without pulling ourselves off our own furniture.
Bumlets suddenly reached down and grabbed onto the next piece on furniture in line- and then proceeded to swing himself underneath it with extreme grace. I was about to have a heart attack when I realized that he was laying on the support brackets on the underside of the table- and he wasn't touching the ground.
I suddenly realized that the only way this was going to work was if I got onto the front piece with Blink, Dutchy, and Itey- which was extremely crowded as it was- and then Racetrack could move up in my spot, and somehow Snitch and Cowboy would have to both fit on that chair with Skittery. As I explained my plan with a series of gestures, I saw some people with doubts and others with excitement in their eyes- but I eventually somehow convinced them that it just might work.
Blink grabbed onto my hand and helped me jump from my furniture to his, and I crashed into him, almost knocking him over backwards. He wrapped his arms around my waist to hold me steady, and I almost fell again, my arms automatically sliding around his waist to balance.
As Racetrack moved up to where I had been, all I could do was hold on for dear life. At least Blink smelled good- very good, in fact. I don't know what cologne he used, but I didn't mind it at all. We wavered a bit, and I held him so tight that I was afraid I might be hurting him- but it wasn't like we had a choice. Either pain or fall. I laid my head against his chest and shut my eyes tightly, trying not to think about how close we were to falling and not willing to watch as Cowboy stepped onto the chair with Snitch and Skittery and almost knocked them all over..
I opened my eyes when Blink tapped me and moved me forward on the furniture- we now had another piece in front to move on to. My plan had worked, and now we only needed one more piece moved around the line to make it. I was once again moved up and ended up pressed against Blink and Itey, and we formed a kind of 'huddle' to stay upright. The furniture was moved and, one by one, we jumped onto the grass on the other side. Cowboy jumped to safety last, and we burst into cheers, and I tackled Blink in a victory hug and then hi-fived Spot.
"Congratulations, house guests. You have won the food competition. And as a reward, tomorrow for lunch you get catered by the local McDonalds."
Boy, was that a relief. It had been so long since I had fast food, and I was ready for something unhealthy. Don't get me wrong- Skittery is an amazing cook, but sometimes you just have to have an ungodly meal.
"We have another surprise for you, house guests. In participating in the food competition, you have also decided who will be head of household."
Whoa. Now that wasn't expected. How in the world could we possibly have decided head of household in all that chaos?
"For being the first one to figure out the 'secret' to winning- the physical contact, that is- Snitch is the new head of household."
I noticed the look of total shock on Snitch's face, though I clearly remembered him taking charge and sending Skittery onto that chair with me and packing that bench full of people. This time, I agreed with 'big brother'- Snitch deserved it.
AN: Okay, short but fun chapter! But just wait until you see the next chapter…it takes place later this very same night, and involves Itey's deathly fear of bad storms…let's just say we get one of those 'bad storms' and the guys feel sorry for him and decide to take his mind off it…