Hello, my scores of loyal fans and readers!
*Crickets chirp*
Ah hell... _
Anyway, sorry for not updating in so long. Its that blasted W32.Blaster.Worm thing. I've had to kill it 3 times now, and I think I got it for good this time, since I tightened up my firewall. *Huggles his firewall*
So I'm back now! REJOICE!
*Crickets chirp*
Hmph.
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Trigun: Way Too Far Behind the Scenes
________________________________________
I wore a small, confident smile. I had a good feeling about this interview, since according to her preliminary bio, Meryl Stryfe was just a normal person. An average, every-day woman who works for an insurance company. Then I noticed a bit in the notes that I had failed to notice beforehand.
"Carries approximately 30 Derringers under her coat and is deadly accurate with them." I gulped audibly, but said nothing to Logan, expecting that he'd turn tail and run immediately. Our lack of success in the interviews was wearing down his enthusiasm, and his sanity. He appeared to have developed a small nervous twitch in his right eye. With any luck, this would be the turning point in our little doomed mission.
I knocked twice, and thought I heard some whispering before Meryl yelled "Come in!" a moment later. Opening the door with uncharacteristic confidence, I stepped in and smiled warmly.
"Hello, Ms. Stryfe," I began, giving her the usual introduction. "I'm Sam, and this is my associate, Logan. We're here from General Idiocy publications, and we've been sent to interview the characters of Trigun."
"Hmm..." Meryl mused, eyeing Logan rather suspiciously. "You know, yesterday Dominique said something about some cameraman sneaking into her dressing room and stealing one of her bras." My head turned like a machine, slowly and methodically, toward Logan, who chuckled uneasily and shifted his eye behind the lens.
"Ahem... Logan... we're gonna have to talk about that..." I hissed through clenched teeth. Meryl raised her left eyebrow. Clutching the back of my neck, I laughed half-heartedly and turned back to Meryl.
"Alright then, moving swiftly on... do you really keep 30 Derringers under your coat?" I heard a tiny squeak from Logan, but kept my eyes on Meryl.
"Well, yeah. After all, each one only fires once."
"What do you do with the spent ones?"
"I just reload them. What did you think, I buy new ones?"
"Um... I have no idea what I think," I admitted with a smile, displaying my mastery of the disturbing non-sequitur. "Anyway, how good are you with them?"
"Uh... I wouldn't exactly toot my own horn, but I'd say I'm pretty good. Maybe not on Vash's or Knives' level, but close."
"Alright then. I'm now making a mental note to never make you angry." Meryl let slip a tiny smirk as she raised her left eyebrow.
"Okay, moving on to other matters," I lead, flipping through my notes. "I don't know if I should pry, but the rumor mill has been working overtime, and... well... I've heard that you and Vash the Stampede are... well... involved... romantically." I paled as I saw Meryl's features tighten considerably, and a vein in her forehead began to pulsate rather disturbingly.
"What?!" she snapped loudly. "I don't know who told you that but its a complete lie! I would never be 'involved' with Vash the Stampede if he were the last man on Earth! He's a complete idiot!" I managed to eke out a bit of regretful thought at having brought it up in the first place, when I heard a muffled yelp of "Huh?!" eminating from the closet. My jaw dropped considerably as Vash the Stampede stumbled out of the closet, wearing a rather hurt expression. It took both Logan and I a moment to realize that he was... very scantily clad... wearing nothing more than a pair of bearskin underwear. I shook slightly as I held back a violent retch. Logan didn't even bother covering it up. He whirled around, steadying himself against the wall, and began yelling with a great deal of vulgarity.
"Holy crap!" he yelled. "You mean we WALKED IN on... th... THAT?!" he gestured wildly at the confused and obviously very cold Vash. "GAH! THE MADNESS! I FEEL ALL DIRTY! GRAAAHH!"
At this point Logan started stomping about the room, flailing erratically, ranting, and cursing.
"Uh... we're gonna go now," I said with a polite smile before I dragged Logan, still babbling, out the door by the back of his collar. Before I closed it, I heard Vash.
"What do you mean 'I would never be involved with him if he were the last man on Earth?'" Then Meryl spoke, making an effort to sound furtive.
"I was just saying that to cover it up! You know you're my little shweetie lumpkins."
"Oh my god," I hissed as I stomped off down the hall. I turned to Logan, who was now dragging limply behind me, flailing and mumbling weakly.
"You know, we did manage to ask most of our questions, so I would consider this interview a mission accomplished!"
"Graaaaaahhh," was his only reply.
Deciding to let him burn out his own madness, I flipped across the clipboard and found our next interview.
"Alright then. Next up: Zazie the Beast."
_____________________________
Come on, you all knew what Vash and Meryl do behind closed doors. I can't really blame Logan.
Logan: BEARSKIN UNDERWEAR!
Yes, we know.
Stay tuned! ^_^
*Crickets chirp*
Ah hell... _
Anyway, sorry for not updating in so long. Its that blasted W32.Blaster.Worm thing. I've had to kill it 3 times now, and I think I got it for good this time, since I tightened up my firewall. *Huggles his firewall*
So I'm back now! REJOICE!
*Crickets chirp*
Hmph.
________________________________________
Trigun: Way Too Far Behind the Scenes
________________________________________
I wore a small, confident smile. I had a good feeling about this interview, since according to her preliminary bio, Meryl Stryfe was just a normal person. An average, every-day woman who works for an insurance company. Then I noticed a bit in the notes that I had failed to notice beforehand.
"Carries approximately 30 Derringers under her coat and is deadly accurate with them." I gulped audibly, but said nothing to Logan, expecting that he'd turn tail and run immediately. Our lack of success in the interviews was wearing down his enthusiasm, and his sanity. He appeared to have developed a small nervous twitch in his right eye. With any luck, this would be the turning point in our little doomed mission.
I knocked twice, and thought I heard some whispering before Meryl yelled "Come in!" a moment later. Opening the door with uncharacteristic confidence, I stepped in and smiled warmly.
"Hello, Ms. Stryfe," I began, giving her the usual introduction. "I'm Sam, and this is my associate, Logan. We're here from General Idiocy publications, and we've been sent to interview the characters of Trigun."
"Hmm..." Meryl mused, eyeing Logan rather suspiciously. "You know, yesterday Dominique said something about some cameraman sneaking into her dressing room and stealing one of her bras." My head turned like a machine, slowly and methodically, toward Logan, who chuckled uneasily and shifted his eye behind the lens.
"Ahem... Logan... we're gonna have to talk about that..." I hissed through clenched teeth. Meryl raised her left eyebrow. Clutching the back of my neck, I laughed half-heartedly and turned back to Meryl.
"Alright then, moving swiftly on... do you really keep 30 Derringers under your coat?" I heard a tiny squeak from Logan, but kept my eyes on Meryl.
"Well, yeah. After all, each one only fires once."
"What do you do with the spent ones?"
"I just reload them. What did you think, I buy new ones?"
"Um... I have no idea what I think," I admitted with a smile, displaying my mastery of the disturbing non-sequitur. "Anyway, how good are you with them?"
"Uh... I wouldn't exactly toot my own horn, but I'd say I'm pretty good. Maybe not on Vash's or Knives' level, but close."
"Alright then. I'm now making a mental note to never make you angry." Meryl let slip a tiny smirk as she raised her left eyebrow.
"Okay, moving on to other matters," I lead, flipping through my notes. "I don't know if I should pry, but the rumor mill has been working overtime, and... well... I've heard that you and Vash the Stampede are... well... involved... romantically." I paled as I saw Meryl's features tighten considerably, and a vein in her forehead began to pulsate rather disturbingly.
"What?!" she snapped loudly. "I don't know who told you that but its a complete lie! I would never be 'involved' with Vash the Stampede if he were the last man on Earth! He's a complete idiot!" I managed to eke out a bit of regretful thought at having brought it up in the first place, when I heard a muffled yelp of "Huh?!" eminating from the closet. My jaw dropped considerably as Vash the Stampede stumbled out of the closet, wearing a rather hurt expression. It took both Logan and I a moment to realize that he was... very scantily clad... wearing nothing more than a pair of bearskin underwear. I shook slightly as I held back a violent retch. Logan didn't even bother covering it up. He whirled around, steadying himself against the wall, and began yelling with a great deal of vulgarity.
"Holy crap!" he yelled. "You mean we WALKED IN on... th... THAT?!" he gestured wildly at the confused and obviously very cold Vash. "GAH! THE MADNESS! I FEEL ALL DIRTY! GRAAAHH!"
At this point Logan started stomping about the room, flailing erratically, ranting, and cursing.
"Uh... we're gonna go now," I said with a polite smile before I dragged Logan, still babbling, out the door by the back of his collar. Before I closed it, I heard Vash.
"What do you mean 'I would never be involved with him if he were the last man on Earth?'" Then Meryl spoke, making an effort to sound furtive.
"I was just saying that to cover it up! You know you're my little shweetie lumpkins."
"Oh my god," I hissed as I stomped off down the hall. I turned to Logan, who was now dragging limply behind me, flailing and mumbling weakly.
"You know, we did manage to ask most of our questions, so I would consider this interview a mission accomplished!"
"Graaaaaahhh," was his only reply.
Deciding to let him burn out his own madness, I flipped across the clipboard and found our next interview.
"Alright then. Next up: Zazie the Beast."
_____________________________
Come on, you all knew what Vash and Meryl do behind closed doors. I can't really blame Logan.
Logan: BEARSKIN UNDERWEAR!
Yes, we know.
Stay tuned! ^_^