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Chapter 10: Fragile
Courtney stood alone on the dock immersed in blackness. The occasional beacon light from incoming boats shone through but dimmed quickly. She could not help but shiver, the harsh wind whipping at her porcelain cheeks. Snow began to fall from the sky and Courtney could feel her body begin to numb, why was she out so late? A smile came to her face the sullen scowl disappearing as thoughts of Jason filled her head. She swore the weight of her heart disappeared an indescribable lightness washing away all the stress of the day.
"So where are you Jason?" Courtney wondered aloud, her gloved hands rubbing the length of her coat. Glancing back at the stairs, she nodded towards Marco standing at the top with the same void expression she had come to know, but now and again, she could swear the tiniest smile was on the verge of breaking through.
"Marco do you think when Jason shows up…"
"Don't need to tell me to scram, I don't need to see all your lovey-dovey displays" Courtney smiled in thanks before turning back to glance at the water. Despite the growing snowfall and below freezing temperatures she stayed standing near the water edge even past the point of no longer feeling her toes.
"Sorry I'm late" Jason whispered into her ear, his arms snaking around her waist enough to create a surge of warmth throughout her body.
"You owe me a hot chocolate and possibly a foot massage"
"Whatever you want"
"I like the way that sounds" Smiling like a Cheshire cat she turned to receive his kiss, the first in what felt like days. The more passionate it became the more Jason wondered when he had become addicted to her taste, the sweet mix of bubble gum and mint chap stick. Pulling her an inch closer, his tongue delved into her mouth, and he realized he had never known someone so well in his entire life. How else could he be able to say on Mondays she wore red and on Friday black, or that she enjoyed cooking but only for him? Courtney pulled away resisting letting him go completely as long as she could feel his breath on her cheek and the beat of his heart nothing could come between them.
"I love you" Her eyes snapped open in shock and Jason pulled back instantly.
Courtney watched as he began to pace right in front of her the soles of his shoes crunching fallen snow.
"I mean we've known each other for a while, It's just natural right?" He looked so lost when he glanced up searching for something in her eyes and all she could do was stand dumbly in the falling snow, mouth agape.
"Look I don't want to rush this, I don't even know why I said that"
"Don't you dare" Jason stepped an inch closer his brows knit in confusion until she finally summoned enough courage to speak again.
"I love you too" Tears pricked at the corners of her eyes but with some unknown courage she kept them in forcing her smile wider in the process. He didn't need to hear anymore before tugging her back into his arms, inhaling deeply the scent of fallen snow and perfume. Lilac, must be Tuesday, he thought smiling a little.
"Well isn't this a cute display" A man withdrew from the shadows, casting a disgusted look on the couple. Something in the strangers step, demeanor made Courtney shiver the wind beginning to hit full force.
"What do you want?" There, Jason was stepping out as a shield not only from the man but from the cold, which was slowly seeping into her bones. Courtney could not help but think maybe it wasn't the bitter wind but the cloud of foreshadowing she felt slowly moving in.
"I wanted Alexis to get Kristina back, all you had to do was get convicted spend a few days in prison then I could have gone after the man I really wanted, Zander. You just couldn't do that could you" The man struck out sending his fist into Jason's cheek. Courtney screamed the sound of bone cracking echoing in her head as she dropped to Jason's side. He did not stay on the ground though instead he shifted his weight successfully steadying himself into a standing position.
"If you're going to fight at least fight fair" Wiping a line of blood from his chin Jason balled his fist preparing to repay the man when Courtney intervened. Her hair was tangled by the wind, snowflakes scattered about her gray coat melting a little every second.
"Stop it both of you, look I don't know who you are…" Her sentence was barely out of her mouth when something sharp sliced through the layers of clothing covering her skin. Something of a gurgle tumbled from her lips, when she finally managed to look down the knife was already back in the man's hand streaked with blood, her blood. Staggering a little she fell to her knees, watching in slow motion as Jason did the same.
"Courtney, it's okay I am 'gonna call the ambulance, I am going to help" He seemed so sure, yet so desperate, god she loved him and it was enough to take her breath away. There was not much left to take though, she could feel the blood slowly seeping from the wound. It made her want to cry but she held it in, forcing a small smile on her face to reassure Jason, he looked scared enough.
"Don't go, just stay with me" Her hand reached for his automatically entwining their fingers.
"But, you're cold, I can see it" Jason was near crying and Courtney began wondering if she'd ever really seen him cry. Pushing the thoughts from her mind, she felt them tumble back into a swallowing blackness and for the first time she realized thoughts would never come to her again.
"Jason, I love you" Trying to keep her voice steady and normal almost drove tears to her eyes but she was strong, her aunt always said, big girls do not cry.
Courtney gripped the collar of his jacket burying her nose in the crook of his neck, if she could just remember his smell, maybe it would linger forever around her like a beautiful memory.
His hand fell to her lower back pulling her as close as he could on his knees her body only half seated on the snow covered dock.
"You smell like cinnamon and Christmas" What did Christmas smell like? She couldn't help but think if someone asked her that in heaven she could answer 'the man I love'.
Tears silently fell from her eyes drifting slowly onto his black shirt thin enough that he could feel it.
"You're not going to die Courtney"
"No Jason you're not going to, the vision I got wasn't full, I was sent here to save you and I did"
"Now save yourself" He began to get angry not at her but the world, if he wasn't allowed to have her what was left, no woman did this to him, no woman loved him like this.
Courtney could feel the pain begin to numb, whether from the cold or exhaustion she couldn't tell but the delirium setting in began forcing her eyes closed.
"You have to fight, I did" She smiled a little at him, weaving her shaking hand into the hair at the nape of his neck.
"It's not your fault, remember that" With that she crushed her lips to his in a sloppy kiss, her grip loosened and the kiss slowed to something like a slow spark, the familiarity of each other setting in. The feel of her lips moving against his stopped and he knew if he pulled way he would cry, the tears that began to painfully wedge themselves in front of his eyes. So instead Jason pulled her limp body further into his arms rocking back and forth as if to some demented tune playing only for him.
Only then did a tear slip down his cheek hot and salty turned to ice by the cold before it could touch her skin.
Courtney's eyes shot open wildly darting across the pale pink room, her heart hammered painfully in her chest but she forced herself up. Machines buzzed and beeped around her, causing her to scatter to the top of the bed, pulling her knees to her chest defensively. Why did her body ache so much? her bones were so stiff and that throbbing. Somewhere in the recess of her mind, a painful jab rang out repeatedly forcing her eyes shut.
"Courtney?" Her eyes slowly opened again this time a familiar face greeted her and she was staring into the vast blue ocean.
"Jason" He came to her side stroking her hair, cheek, anything his hands could touch, just the feel of her skin alive sent shocks of electricity through his blood.
"How did you get here, you're in jail"
"I got out they found the gun forced Alexis to drop the case" He looked so happy, the smile of a free man, she thought, forcing one to her own.
"Are you in pain?" His brow knit together in concentration one hand still absently working through the tangled knots of her hair, painlessly smoothing it out.
"No I just don't remember how I got here"
"You were brought in last night" Courtney looked at the woman now standing in the doorway, she seemed so small in her oversized lab coat. It was the expression on the doctors' face that made Courtney sit back a little.
"Jason why don't you let me talk with Courtney for a minute alone" He hesitated looking between the two, until Courtney's hand fell softly against his squeezing with as much strength as she could muster.
"I'll be fine" He nodded still unsure but he began to recognize that look in her eyes, he had seen it in Carlys' a million times before, she was resolute. Dropping a kiss to the top of her hair, he pried his hands from her grip, leaving quickly before the urge to stay became too great.
"Courtney I looked over your tests and it's like nothing I've seen before you're…"
The doctor stopped gulping as if to get the scratchy feeling from her throat.
"You're…"
"Dying" Even when Courtney admitted it, both women sat in silent shock.