Chapter Eight

"I'm walking on sunshine, wa-oh!" Goku sang. "I'm walking on sunshine, WA-OH! NOW DON'T IT FEEL GOOD!!!"

"Be quiet!" Piccolo snapped, holding his right hand over his ear. "Anyone would think you're already drunk!"

"Da! Ba ba, na-na na-na na na na!" Goku continued to sing.

Piccolo switched the large slab of beer from one hand to the other. Though he was fine with the weight, it was proving to be awkard to carry. As they reached Yumcha's building, Piccolo pulled Goku aside and whispered harsly in his ear.

"You know the plan, right?"

"Of course!" Goku chirped. "He gets drunk, and we take him partying. Then, instead of making Bulma think he's cheated, we get him to actually cheat!"

Piccolo smirked, the waved his free arm to the closed door. "Would you do the honours?"

Yumcha had just finished burning Roshi's stock of the salacious and was adding Vegeta's silken undergarments when there was a loud knock on the door.

"I'll be there in a second!" He called out, turning his head.

Without warning, the boxers burst into flames, spitting sparks in every direction. Yumcha dropped the boxers in shock, which fell on his leg and ignited his pants.

"YAA!" He yelped, hopping about, trying to pat the flames out.

Suddenly, the remainder of last week's pizza found itself under Yumcha's foot, and the poor baseballer found himself slipping over, only to hit his head on the oven top hot plates.

The lit gas hot plates he was using to burn the porn.

"EEAAARRRGGHHH!!!!" He yelled, running back and forth. "MY HAIR IS ON FIRE! MY HAIR IS ON FIRE! MY HAIR IS ON FIRE! MY HAIR IS ON FIRE!"

Yumcha was stopped in his tracks by a sudden splash of cold water on top of his head. Dripping ashen water off his face, Yumcha looked up and saw Goku filling up a jug at the sink. Next to him was Piccolo, who was stomping out the small fire the boxers had started.

Goku poured half the jug on top of Yumcha's head, and the rest on his burnt leg.

"Man, that looked really nasty, Yumcha. Are you alright?" Goku asked.

"I'll be fine." Yumcha sighed, running a hand through what was left of his hair.

Piccolo snorted and began chuckling. "You should see your hair!"

Goku blinked, and began laughing too.

Yumcha turned the corner and looked at himself in the mirror. His hair was much, much shorter and was sticking straight up.

He walked back out to the kitchen, and found himself laughing despite his horrid luck.

"Yeah, I look like Vegeta with a haircut or something!" He joked.

"I'd advise that in the future, you be a little more careful with your cooking." Piccolo smirked.

Yumcha grinned. "Actually, I was getting rid of a pile of pornography that appeared in my aparment. You wouldn't believe the selection!"

"Porn- pornography?" Goku gulped.

"Yeah, you know, those magazines Roshi's always drooling over." Yumcha explained. "I have no idea how it got to my apartment. Anyway, what are you two doing here? And... how did you get in? My door locks itself...!"

Yumcha ran to his front door.

"What, you think we busted it in?" Piccolo scoffed.

Yumcha opened it, testing it was still intact.

"Yeah, we heard you yelling, so Piccolo did this neat trick which unlocked it." Goku explained. "He just waved his hand at the handle and click!"

Yumcha closed his door.

"Well... why are you here?" Yumcha asked. "Not that I'm not happy you are."

"We heard you got engaged to Bulma, so we came to celebrate with you." Goku smiled warmly. "It's not everyday you get married!"

Yumcha smiled. "Thanks guys."

"Have a beer." Piccolo chucked a can at Yumcha.

"I probably shouldn't." Yumcha looked at it. "But what the hey, I don't drink often and this is a special occasion."

Piccolo grinned, and threw Goku a can.

Well, that's pretty much the last thing that Goku could remember before a piercing light from the crack in the curtains awoke him. His head throbbed painfully, and through the dank dark of the room he could see that he was lying on Yumcha's table.

He sat up, rubbed his head and discovered somebody's panties in his hand. There were beer cans, liquor bottles and empty glasses lying all around him on the space of the table, seats and floor. He then realised his pants were missing.

He moaned, and got off the table. Dragging his feet and scratching his head, he trudged into the living room.

In a similar situation to the one Goku awoke in, Piccolo lay, snoring, across Yumcha's sofa. Goku could clearly identify the pool of vomit that lay on the carpet, and on his pants. Well, that explains why he took them off. Kind of.

He stumbled over to Yumcha's bedroom, creaking the door ajar and peeking in. It appeared Yumcha had attempted to get into bed and failed. The poor man lay starfished on the floor next to his bed, wearing only a pair of dirty briefs. He snorted and kicked in his sleep, then lay still.

Goku then lazily made his way back to the kitchen, and began rumaging through Yumcha's cupboards in search of breakfast. He grabbed a packet of cornflakes, emptied it into the largest bowl he could find in his hungover state, poured on all the milk in the house and began munching.

Halfway through breakfast, Piccolo staggered in. He looked up at Goku, grunted a good morning, and sat down in the closest chair. One look told Goku that Piccolo felt as bad as he did.

The two sat in silence for a moment.

"Did the plan work?" Goku mumbled.

"I don't know." Piccolo growled, holding his head. "I can't remember."

There was a loud thump from Yumcha's room, acompanied by a loud "Oow!"

"Yumcha's awake." Goku announced.

Yumcha tripped in, and fell into a chair. He sat still for a moment, then let out a long moan. He gripped his head in his hands, then lay it down on the table, knocking a half-full bottle over.

"Remind me to never drink again." He groaned.

Goku kept eating.