Chapter 7: Forsaken Me
By: DarkDuelist
Disclaimer: Aladdin, Jasmine and Co. are copyright of Disney and I used them without permission. This idea came from Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Normal Again, which belongs to Joss Whedon. The ep 'Normal Again' was written by Diego Gutierrez so tons of credit to both of them. The title of this chapter comes from the song Chop Suey! by System of A Down. (*) means the character is thinking. (^^^) is when the place changes from Agrabah to the institution. (~) is the voice.
~Do you remember Alan? How good life used to be. Before all this. It was good, wasn't it?~
"Please," I cried harder. "just leave me alone."
~But you threw it all away! So you could live in your sick make believe world. Do you remember that day, you locked yourself in your room? You thought that you were going to make me stop. Remember Alan, I know you do.~
I nodded my head. I did remember. I remember it all. I came home through the back door so my mother wouldn't see me. I went up to my room...
~The world wants you gone.~
Alan pulled the knife from under his bed. It had been there for almost a week. Everyday the voice in his head told him he was doing the right thing. He pulled his shirt off and pick the knife up. The cold metal becoming warmish in his hands.
~No more suffering.~
He put the blade so that is just barley touched his skin. With a deep breath he cut deep in to his wrist then switch hands and cut the other. He sat there on the floor watching as his blood drip onto the carpet. He could hear his mother calling for him. *Sorry Mom. I'm too busy bleeding to death right now.* He hang his head down and waited.
{Father into your hands I commend my spirit
Father into you hands.
Why have you forsaken me in your eyes
Forsaken me in your thoughts
Forsaken me in your heart, forsaken me}
"Alan?" He looked up to see his mother. "Oh God, Alan! What did you do?"
"Mom? Do you trust me?" Alan hang his again. "If you do you'll leave alone."
{Trust in my self righteous suicide.
I cry when angels deserve to die.
In my self righteous suicide
I cry when angels deserve to die..-Chop Suey!}
~Your a sick sick boy. Did you think you were brave? Dumb boy. Well, you sure have pay for it, have you? Five years Alan. Five years in this place. In THAT place! With your make believe "friends." Well, Alan, were are your little "friends" now?!~
"Shut up!" I jumped up looking around the room, trying to find the voice that told me everything I did wrong. "Shut up! Damn You! Your nothing! You hear me, damnit?! NOTHING!"
~You always could handle thing well, couldn't you Alan?~
"Shut the hell up you son of a..."
"Alan?"
Dr. Rosenberg and my mother stood there looking at me. Dr. Rosenberg step forward.
"Alan, it's okay. There's no on here but us."
I fell to the floor crying. "Please," I cried harder. "Please God, please."
My mother came over and hugged me tight. "It's okay Sweetheart. We'll help you. Everything is going to be fine."
I hugged her close, I didn't want to ever let her go. "I'm sorry." I sob into her long hair. "I'm so sorry. For everything. I...I.."
"It's all right. Your going to be all right." She gently rocked me back and forth.
"I...I just want to know..." I tried to stop sobbing. "I just want to know whats real."
By: DarkDuelist
Disclaimer: Aladdin, Jasmine and Co. are copyright of Disney and I used them without permission. This idea came from Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Normal Again, which belongs to Joss Whedon. The ep 'Normal Again' was written by Diego Gutierrez so tons of credit to both of them. The title of this chapter comes from the song Chop Suey! by System of A Down. (*) means the character is thinking. (^^^) is when the place changes from Agrabah to the institution. (~) is the voice.
~Do you remember Alan? How good life used to be. Before all this. It was good, wasn't it?~
"Please," I cried harder. "just leave me alone."
~But you threw it all away! So you could live in your sick make believe world. Do you remember that day, you locked yourself in your room? You thought that you were going to make me stop. Remember Alan, I know you do.~
I nodded my head. I did remember. I remember it all. I came home through the back door so my mother wouldn't see me. I went up to my room...
~The world wants you gone.~
Alan pulled the knife from under his bed. It had been there for almost a week. Everyday the voice in his head told him he was doing the right thing. He pulled his shirt off and pick the knife up. The cold metal becoming warmish in his hands.
~No more suffering.~
He put the blade so that is just barley touched his skin. With a deep breath he cut deep in to his wrist then switch hands and cut the other. He sat there on the floor watching as his blood drip onto the carpet. He could hear his mother calling for him. *Sorry Mom. I'm too busy bleeding to death right now.* He hang his head down and waited.
{Father into your hands I commend my spirit
Father into you hands.
Why have you forsaken me in your eyes
Forsaken me in your thoughts
Forsaken me in your heart, forsaken me}
"Alan?" He looked up to see his mother. "Oh God, Alan! What did you do?"
"Mom? Do you trust me?" Alan hang his again. "If you do you'll leave alone."
{Trust in my self righteous suicide.
I cry when angels deserve to die.
In my self righteous suicide
I cry when angels deserve to die..-Chop Suey!}
~Your a sick sick boy. Did you think you were brave? Dumb boy. Well, you sure have pay for it, have you? Five years Alan. Five years in this place. In THAT place! With your make believe "friends." Well, Alan, were are your little "friends" now?!~
"Shut up!" I jumped up looking around the room, trying to find the voice that told me everything I did wrong. "Shut up! Damn You! Your nothing! You hear me, damnit?! NOTHING!"
~You always could handle thing well, couldn't you Alan?~
"Shut the hell up you son of a..."
"Alan?"
Dr. Rosenberg and my mother stood there looking at me. Dr. Rosenberg step forward.
"Alan, it's okay. There's no on here but us."
I fell to the floor crying. "Please," I cried harder. "Please God, please."
My mother came over and hugged me tight. "It's okay Sweetheart. We'll help you. Everything is going to be fine."
I hugged her close, I didn't want to ever let her go. "I'm sorry." I sob into her long hair. "I'm so sorry. For everything. I...I.."
"It's all right. Your going to be all right." She gently rocked me back and forth.
"I...I just want to know..." I tried to stop sobbing. "I just want to know whats real."