I neither own the rights to Halloween, Three's Company, 8 Simple Rules......, nor Married with Children. They are owned by their respective owners. RIP John Ritter.

_________________________________________________

(The "Three's Company" opening credits play in the opening sequence.)

INT. JACK, CRISSY, AND JANET'S APARTMENT, HADDONFIELD, IL, OCTOBER 31, 1978: It is 8:15 A.M. and Jack Tripper is cooking breakfast. Janet and Crissy are asleep. The doorbell rings.

JACK: Just a minute!

(Jack runs to the door and finds........)

JACK: Oh, hey, Mr. Roper! (Smiling) How's it going?

MR. ROPER: I just wanted to remind you that your rent is due today.....And also, it's Halloween, and, uhmm......some guy in a white mask escaped from a sanitarium out in Smith's Grove last night. He killed his sister in 1963, so you might want to be careful. He's wearing the whitest Captain Kirk mask and a mechanic's uniform, and possibly carrying a huge butcher knife. If you see him, call the police.

JACK: Alright.

MR. ROPER: Well, the wife is probably worried about me by now. I'd better get back home.

JACK: See ya, Mr. Roper! (Smiling)

(Laugh track)

INT. HADDONFIELD HIGH SCHOOL, 9:30 A.M.: Laurie Strode is in her class and sees a man in a white mask outside of her classroom. Scary music plays in the background. She turns away thern looks back to see that the man has disappeared.

INT. ROPER'S APARTMENT, 9:30 A.M.: Mr. Roper is reading the newspaper with the headline "MICHAEL MYERS RETURNS TO HADDONFIELD." Mrs. Roper is sitting on the couch next to him.

MRS. ROPER: Are you sure this Myers guy is dangerous?

MR. ROPER: Come on, Helen! This guy killed his older sister when he was six! And that was fifteen years ago! I believe this Loomis guy: Myers is pure EVIL!

(The Ropers' doorbell rings. Mr. Roper jumps with fright. Laugh track.)

MR. ROPER: Don't answer it!

(Mrs. Roper opens the door and sees none other than.........)