Greetings and salutations fellow obsessive compulsives, psychos, otakus, rabid fan-girls (or guys), and whoever else may read this story of mine! It officially the holidays! That means I can torture you all a lot more! *laughs insanely*
Avalan: I pity you all.
Dr. Lauryl: … did you call him Selsel? That's also very kawaii! (totemo kawaii desu ne!) I just had to add the whole eating thing, I barely eat in the morning, and was rather disturbed when I saw the other's antics when it came to eating (like when Scott threw an apple at everyone, and Kurt chucked a half-eaten muffin back at him… *sigh* children). It's weird. Unlike my Matrix fic (which I'm very proud of… but disturbed by the rabid reviewers after my blood for not up-dating… for a couple of months), I actually know what I'm doing in this one! I have a not particularly detailed plan for Sel's life after school… but I don't know how to link it though…. Heh… anyway…
Shadowcat: Don't worry about review length, so long as people tell me what they think about my story. AH, but do I understand about the whole 'school' thing. I think they deliberately make it sucky.
Mental Health
"Hey Sel! Just in time to come out to a paaar-tay with the rest of us!" Kurt chirped, smiling at me as I woke.
"No. Thanks."
I rolled over onto my side.
"Hey, what's up, gloomy-guts?" He asked perkily, still trying to get my attention.
"Nothing." I replied in a monotone that didn't even convince me.
"Aw give me a little credit, I'm not that stupid." He said, laying a hand on my shoulder.
I shuddered slightly.
"It's okay, you go."
Kurt reluctantly back out of the room, and five minutes later, I managed to pull together enough energy to get up and shut the door.
I sat down at my desk. Part of me wanted to kill something slowly. Like the person that set up the experiment. Yet another part of me wanted to deny it, and go on like nothing had ever happened. A lot of me wanted to cry for the family that I would never, and never did have. Cry for the unfairness of it all. There were plenty of orphans at the institute, I had known that I had been one in the first place, but at least they had foster families that loved them. I had no one but myself.
I wondered darkly if they would record what would happen if I happened to kill myself.
I tried to act normal, so I tried to absorb myself in my homework. Sadly enough, there wasn't enough to keep me interested. So, I made an appearance at dinner instead of just eating what was left later on when I was actually hungry.
"Selwyn?"
"Uh?"
"Pass the salt."
"Uhn."
"Thanks."
People talked around me, but not too me, something which I was all too happy about.
My small serving of pasta bake sat heavily in my stomach, and I sat with my hands between my knees until everyone else had finished their meals.
I was following the paths of individual threads through the tablecloth when another person said my name.
"Selwyn?"
"Eh?"
"What's wrong? You haven't said a thing all night."
It was Storm. She laid her fork aside, and looked me straight in the eyes.
"Um… just… thinking," I replied, lying through my teeth. In truth I was attempting to go into a catatonic state, but I wasn't about to say that.
Jean, Xavier, Storm, Logan and Scott all gazed at me penetratingly. Was I really that easy to read?
"What? Can't a guy think in peace without people breathing down my neck?"
"We were just wondering if…"
"Sorry… I know I'm being snappish, but I've just got a lot on my mind lately…"
I scraped my chair back, and left the room, closing the door gently behind me. I didn't want to talk to anyone.
Without even thinking about it, I walked.
When I eventually became aware of my surroundings, I was closing the front door of the institute after myself.
Autumn was coming, I could tell from the abrasive night air that surrounded me as I walked a ways down the driveway wand stared up at the stars starting to bloom as the sun crept slowly down the horizon.
Eventually I ran. Not because I was trying to warm myself up, or any other reason, just because I could. The night was perfect for thinking, and the movement of my legs beneath me kept my body busy and adrenaline pumping, and left my mind alone to ponder. And ponder I did.
*~*~*~*
I arrived back at the institute a little after the others returned from their party – the hood of the car that they had used was still warm – and Kurt was zonked out on his bed as I slunk into our room. By the time that the sun rose again, I knew the ceiling above my head intricately, but hadn't gained much sleep.
It was hard to with Nightcrawler snoring and muttering things in German opposite me. That's right ladies and gentlemen, after sharing a room with him, I can easily decree that Kurt is not a graceful sleeper.
When I woke up the next morning, I realised that I still had a day of freedom left, and the first thing that came to mind was reading the files. The second thing that came to mind was that there was a blue person with a tail hanging from the ceiling. I double took, then sat up slowly.
"Kurt, what are you doing?"
The blue elf stopped at his tugging, cursing and twisting, to look at me, then started to fall. He 'poofed' (as I like to call it) then re-appeared upright a few centimetres from the ground.
"De stupid light blub burst, and now I can't get it out."
It still didn't make sense.
"So why are you therefore hanging from the ceiling and swearing?"
Kurt looked abashed and scratched his head. "Heh… anger management?"
I raised a hand for silence, pushed the dust bin to the approximate place under the light fitting, then waved a hand, almost flippantly, at the ceiling.
The lightbulb crumbled to dust, but, unfortunately something else did as well.
"Dude!" Kurt cried. "You just fried the light socket!"
"… Wow, that hasn't happened in a while…"
Confused and embarrassed, I continued. "Don't worry, give me a couple of hours to walk down to the hardware store and back, and I'll make it good as new!"
I grabbed my sweatshirt, and left before he could say anything else.
During my long walk down to the actual town of Bayville, I pondered on what had happened. Well, it was something to get my mind off the computer lurking at the back of my thoughts.
I wasn't entirely sure why my accuracy had been so bad. I'd been able to control things properly since I was about twelve. It just didn't make sense that now that I could screw up.
Breathless halfway there, I stopped at the side of the road. Also odd. I had been the picture of fitness for my size before I got out.
My breath started coming in gasps, and eventually, I started coughing.
The thing that really worried me was what I found left on my glove after my coughing fit subsided. Blood.
I knew for a fact that wasn't healthy. I decided to ignore it and hope it went away.
I also decided to console myself for having crappy health, a crappy mood, crappy height and a crappy life in general, by adding something extra to the light. I couldn't wait to see the look on Nightcrawler's face.
With a weary smile, I moved on.
*~*~*~*
"So? Did you fix it?"
I lowered my 'Genetics and You' book from in front of my face, and grinned.
I fumbled around for a second to free my hands, and clapped twice.
The light turned on.
"Do I rule, or what?"
"Dude! That is so cool!"
"Yes, I know, I rule. Please, no autographs."
We grinned at each other for a second, and I went back to my book. I was putting off the computer, and my health once again. My slogan for the campaign was 'ignorance is bliss'.
I was resigned to the fact that I was going to have bad health for quite some time, until my body built up proper resistance, and, in accordance to my 'slogan', I decided to ignore my body's little rebellions was best.
Still, there was a little voice at the back of my head pointing out that the last time I had ignored my body, I had ended up blowing things up. I ignored that as well.
As the day went on, it became almost hot, and combined with the clear blue sky above, it made the pool too enticing to not use for my peers.
Of course, having no idea how to swim but not wanting to mention it, I politely declined to join the others, and sat I in the shade nearby in shorts and a singlet with my trusty genetics book.
About ten minutes in, I took off my shoes and socks, and enjoyed the feeling of the sandy bricks under my feet, with the sounds of slashing and general revelry as I learnt more about the wonderful world of RNA.
Five minutes after that, a darker shadow than the dappled ones thrown off by the palm trees above me was cast (once again) over my book. I frowned. I had experienced people looming too many times in the past week or so to not no the signs, and (being the bookworm that I am), it no logner had the impact that it used to..
"Could you please move? You're in my light."
The next thing I knew, my book was forcibly removed from my hands, and I was hoisted up by my elbows.
"Hey! What are you…"
I could tell by the malicious smiles on Spyke, Scott and Kurt's faces, and the general direction they were heading in what was going to happen next, and I started to struggle madly.
"Oh please no. You don't understand I can't- Argh! No! You stupid-!"
"Boys, no!"
Splash.
Let me tell you know, that I can handle bathes of all shapes and sizes. I can even handle spas. I cannot, however handle being pitched face-first into the deep-end of a pool. I had never swum before in my life.
Somehow, I reached the surface, and with a lot of coughing, choking and yelling abuse, I reached the side of the pool, and clung to it like a bedraggled rat.
"Are you deaf as well as dumb, or did you just not listen to me when I said that I CAN'T SWIM?!" I broke off into coughing again, and then wiped the water and blood away from my mouth before attempting to continue.
The three culprits looked like they weren't sure whether to be laughing or apologising, so stood there.
Kurt looked almost sick. "Ah, Sel, I think your hand is bleeding…"
With only a quick glance at my hand, I answered, almost flippantly, "No, I coughed that up. But anyway…"
I didn't get to finish my lecture as the adults in our community swooped down on myself and Kurt, Scott and Spyke.
Logan helped me out of the water, but I insisted on standing myself.
I was swaying a lot, and my legs left rubbery. Coughing until I was choking, the pool swept towards me once again.
I'm so evil! *sob* how can I be so mean to my Sellie-sel?
Avalan: Like so. *points at chapter*
But don't worry, there is reason behind the madness! Oh yes, and Sorry about the chapter being so very minuscule, but it was the only place I could cut it off without getting too caught up in everything else. Sacrifices have to be made for my sanity's sake.
Avalan: You're sane?!
P