A FEW SURPRISES
Pax had stopped off to pick up the kid for Donovan. She did that from time to time. As the two of them began to stroll along, Stasia babbled excitedly, stopping every few inches to examine something. She had drawn another picture. This one was exclusively for her Donnie. Three-year-olds weren't the best artists in the whole world, but damn if that picture didn't choke her up a little. She supposed she did love the little blonde shit. God. How many times in so many months had she thought that? She and the kid entered the loft. At that moment, Pax wanted to take a shower so bad she would have paid for it. She gave the kid a snack and listened to her talk excitedly about her day. After she wore herself out, Pax carried her upstairs and laid her down in her bed. Stasia could sack out for a little while and give her a chance to shower. As she was stripping down, she realized that she hadn't put the suitcase away. It didn't matter. She would do that later. Right now, she needed something else. After her shower, she came out to await Donovan. The hours of six, seven, and then eight passed with no sign of him. By the time nine rolled around, she had given up on him. Something must have gone terribly wrong at the nest today. Stasia was fed and bathed. Her eyes were glazed over. She had only napped about thirty minutes before she was up and at it again. It was time for the kid to go to bed. Hell, while she was at it, she'd go to bed herself. He couldn't put his whole life on hold to listen to her pathetic whining. It didn't dawn on her to put away the suitcase. She didn't care.
Donovan entered the darkened interior of the loft no later than ten, but it had felt like a lifetime. He longed for a drink, but he was too damn tired to pour it and drink it down. He glanced upward toward the bedrooms and noticed that all the lights were out. Pax? In bed? At this hour? He climbed upstairs and went into Stasia's room first. Of course, she would be in bed. She was a deep sleeper, nothing like either of her parents. He ran his hand over her head, smoothing back her soft blonde hair. His mind again drifted to the phone conversation with Joe Ellis. No one is taking my daughter away from me. No one. He lingered only a moment longer before slipping into his own bedroom. He was met with two surprises at once. The first, of course, was the fact that Pax was in bed asleep. The other was a gaped open suitcase sitting in the middle of the floor. For a moment, he was angrier than he had been the entire day. She was going to leave. It was as simple as that. He had recognized the symptoms and sure enough, it was happening before his very eyes. He shook his head and went over to his side of the bed. If he didn't sit down, he was bound to fall down. His entire way of life was falling apart. His former in-laws wanted to steal his child and the woman he loved wanted to run away and hide. Goddamn it. He didn't understand. He had never been so confused in his life. He glanced over at Pax. She was in her usual sleep position and seemed quite comfortable. It was obvious she had been here for a while. Had she intended to take a brief nap and then take off? What had she intended to do with his daughter? He refused to believe that she would leave Stasia alone. At first, he nearly left it alone. He would take a shower, change clothes, take his daughter, and leave her be. However, he couldn't. He loved her for God's sake. He brought himself to his feet and flicked on the light.
Pax groaned and threw her arms over her face. She didn't immediately open her eyes. Instead, she moaned and groaned, cursing him under her breath. Her sleeping brain had forgotten how desperately she needed him earlier today. After some time, she finally removed her arms and sat up in the middle of the bed. She first settled her eyes on Donovan, and then they fell on the suitcase. Fucking shit. I forgot to put the fucking thing away before he got home. When she looked at him again, she noticed that there was very little anger in his eyes, but she could see that he was tired. It was all over him. If she explained it, would he believe her? "I know it looks bad," she began. He didn't move or flinch. "I've been wanting to leave for a couple of days now. You're in a lot of trouble because of my mouth and me. I thought you might be better off without me. I actually had that suitcase packed high. I couldn't go. I just…couldn't."
He had never heard her speaking in such a way the entire time he'd known her. This was new and different. She wasn't blustery or gruff. She wasn't trying to hide her true feelings with crude humor. She was talking straight and he honestly didn't know how to react. He couldn't lie and say he wasn't pissed. The moment he saw the suitcase, he nearly went into another flying rage. One was enough for today. Donovan moved a little closer to the bed and he noticed that her eyes followed him about the room. Did he want to sit on the bed with her? Did he want to be within strangling reach in case she was bullshitting him? He went to the bed and sat before her. He noticed that she wouldn't reach out to him. Instead, she kept her hands in her lap as if she were a little girl. "You couldn't go," he asked. "And why was that? Lack of transportation? You missed the bus? What? I don't understand."
No one but Frank Donovan could cut her like this, making her feel as if her heart was about to explode. No one had ever meant as much to her as he did, not for many, many years. There was anger and fatigue about him, but something else was about him as well. Hurt. It radiated off his body like his fine smelling cologne. It seemed to be a deeper kind of hurt than her splayed open suitcase. However, right now, she wasn't certain that he would tell her. "Okay, Donovan, I deserved that shot," she told him. "I truly did. I couldn't go because of you, damn it. I saw your face, heard you say you loved me, and then just when I had that fucking suitcase locked, I saw your goddamn engagement ring. I couldn't go. Not after I thought about all that. You know, Frank. You know everything about me. You know how easy it was for me to walk away. I've done it a million times. I thought it would be easy this time, but I was wrong. This time, I love you too much. I'm not going anywhere, I just forgot to put up the stupid thing."
He sighed and leaned forward. He placed a very soft kiss to her forehead and then pulled away. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. It's been a really shitty day. I'm glad you told me, Jonella. I don't think I could take any more surprises today." She opened her mouth to respond, but he drew away and stood up. How funny was this? Pax was being the forthcoming one tonight and he was tightlipped. Had their brains been transferred? All day long, he had wanted to see her, speak to her, but now that he had his opportunity, the words dried up in his throat. He paced about the room a time or two before stopping. He sat before her again. "There were a few things. The first is that the new case we have is related to the murders of Remy and her husband. It appears Darryl Hilton wasn't so pristine. As startling as that is, as horrible as that sounds, it's not the worst. Our friend, Detective Norwood, shared her theories with my former in-laws. And now, they want to take my daughter away because they think I'm a murderer."
It was her turn to reach out. She took hold of his hands and held them in hers. "I'm sorry. Maybe when the DNA comes back, the bitch will back off," she said hopefully. "Right after I unpacked, I took a walk, and the bitch was following me. She started talking shit about me and she brought up Lee's death. She made it sound as if I let him play in traffic or something. She's hitting our soft areas, Frank. She's hitting them hard. I don't think she gives one tin shit about finding the killer. She's got some kind of grudge or something." She released one of his hands and touched his cheek. "Are you okay? I mean, that was a true bonehead question, because I can see that you're not. Other than beating the piss out of that cop, is there anything I can do?"
"You're doing it right now," he said. Donovan leaned forward again and placed another kiss on her forehead. "Go back to sleep. I'll join you in a bit."
She took hold of his wrist. "No, Frank. Wait a minute." His body relaxed and he focused his eyes on her face. God. How many times had she been rehearsing this? How many times had she imagined saying this to him? The words were choked back again, but she wouldn't hold them in. She had the opportunity to leave him today, but she didn't. It was time to say something. "There is something I need to tell you." He waited patiently, a curious glimmer in his eyes. Come on you stupid bitch. Speak. "What would you say if I told you I loved you back then, too? What would you say if I told you I was ready to get married? Would you believe it?" The silence a moment after her words were out was deafening. She wondered vaguely if she had spoken aloud at all. Donovan was looking at her as if he had lost his mind. "Frank?"
"You said that to me in bed," he told her as if she hadn't said the words. "I heard you. I heard every word. And then you played it the next morning as if I were dreaming. Why did you do that? Why could you not tell me that it wasn't a dream?" He shook his head. "Don't answer that, I know why you didn't. You've been fighting this for weeks, haven't you? That's what all this brooding has been about, hasn't it? You know how I've felt about it all along, but you didn't want to admit that you wanted it, too. Do you want it, Jonella? Do you want it now?"
She nodded. "I do," she said, her voice breaking just slightly. "If you still want it, if I haven't turned you off, I want it."
He shook his head. "I'm not turned off at all. I've wanted to marry you since the day I half assed mentioned it to you in the van. I know you remember that. I'm glad you had that revelation. I thought I was going to have to drug you to get you to marry me."
She smiled a little and leaned forward. Her lips met his for a gentle kiss, but the moment she tasted him, it was all over for her. The hellish day had suddenly settled its full weight on her shoulders and she wanted nothing more than to make love to Donovan and fall asleep within his arms. After a long moment, he broke the kiss and stood. She watched as he stripped out of his clothing. It didn't take long for her to follow suit. She had wanted to strip him down, but perhaps he knew she would only tease and prolong the agony. All she had on was her shorts and tee shirt. It took approximately five seconds for her to strip. He came down to the bed beside her and kissed her again. She pressed her body against his, thrusting her hands into his short hair, and then allowed them to travel down onto his neck. When the kiss was broken, his lips found her throat. She sighed aloud when she felt him placing nibbling bites upon her flesh. He was trying to prod her down to her back, but she didn't want to go the passive route. However, it didn't matter. The moment his hand touched her shoulder, her back hit the mattress easily, willingly. His lips encircled one of her hardened nipples and then moved to the other before she could breathe. There were many things he loved about her. One of those was the coloring of her flesh. Although she had never wanted to associate herself with anything delicate, her nipples were a delicate shade of pink. The same could be said about her lips. If he ever voiced that aloud, she would probably kill him. He wanted to venture lower, but it could wait. Right now, he wanted to kiss her again.
Her hands glided along his back, down the slope of his spine, and settled momentarily on his awesome ass. What did he do to get those cheeks so rock hard? Her hands came around and he gasped a bit against her lips when her hand encircled him. There was barely enough room down there for a finger, much less her entire hand. Yet, she managed. She never had a problem doing that before. Her delicate caress was driving him a little over the edge. His lips moved away from hers as a low moan left him. She knew how far she could push him with this. Her hand moved away and he resumed his own exploration. His lips encircled her nipples for the second time before moving between her breasts. He placed gentle, moist kisses along her ribcage, and then moved lower to her abdomen. When his wet tongue touched her inside, she thrust her hand into his hair again and took a good handful. Oh. If he made her come, she would probably pull a big old patch of hair right out of his head. He stopped just as she felt a climax building. He had learned her cues so well. For a moment, she thought he might kiss her again, and she awaited it. He enjoyed kissing her and she equally enjoyed receiving them. Instead, he positioned himself over her. She could feel him against her, so very hard and ready. What was this? She had barely laid one finger on him. She wanted this to last all night. She didn't want this to be over before it began. And then it dawned on her. You're marrying him. You have your entire life to spend making love to him. You're not leaving him. He's not leaving you. If he wants to make love to you in haste, let him do it. You have tomorrow, the next day, the day after that, and the day after that. He ran the back of his hand along her cheek.
"I never thought that when I came home, I would end up feeling like this," he told her. "I love you."
Without another word, she felt him slide into her deeply. She closed her eyes tightly and reveled in the sensation as he took his time. He, apparently, didn't give a shit that they were getting married. He moved within her slowly and her hands moved down to his buttocks. Oh. She didn't like this slow stuff. She wanted him to go fast and furiously. Tonight, it was what she wanted and needed, but he wasn't having that, of course. She gasped aloud when he touched her where their bodies were joined. She hated [not really] when he did this to her. It was like a double whammy or something. She couldn't stand it. He knew this. He knew it and used it to his advantage every chance he got. He was an asshole, but he was her asshole. She kissed him to try to divert his attention, but it didn't work. She nibbled at his lips, trying to bite them, but he kept pulling away. She eventually gave up. She wasn't going to win, anyway. For now, he had the upper hand. His mouth covered hers to stifle a cry as she reached her first of many climaxes that night. She was glad, too. She might have awakened the kid. Hell, she would have awakened her. No doubt about it. After her third [or was it her fourth] climax, he finally gave her a bit of control. They switched positions without losing their connection for a second. She began to move with him again. He reached out to her, perhaps to cup her waist, but she took hold of his hand. She ran her lips along his fingers and then held his hand between her breasts, beneath her heartbeat. Right now, it was beating quite frantically. He took in a sharp, hissing breath. This was a cue of his that she had learned well. He was ever so close to his own climax. Well, we're going to have to fix that, now aren't we? He moved the hand between her breasts and brought them both around to her buttocks. He gripped them tightly as he began moving her harder against him. Before long, he sank his teeth into his bottom lip, and all movement ceased. He had closed his eyes tightly as his body froze. With a groan, he rode wave after wave of intense euphoria. His fingers had dug into the soft flesh of her buttocks, pinching almost, but she didn't notice.
After a very long moment, Donovan sat up with her still astride him. He kissed her deeply. When the kiss was broken, she buried her face in his shoulder. "I love you," she said against his skin. "I'm sorry I put you through so much hell."
"It was all worth it," he told her. "Every last bit of it."
"Even when I called you Spankie," she asked with a giggle.
He laughed. "Well, there are some exceptions. What made you change your mind?"
She sighed. She knew he was going to ask that question eventually. She just didn't think he'd ask it so soon. "I'm not sure. Lots of things. I wanted it after I realized that what we had wasn't just a novelty to you. I wanted to make sure I wasn't a replacement for your ex. In the beginning, that's kind of what I thought I thought I was. Rebound relationships happen all the time. I didn't realize how serious it was until I thought you got shot. I saw you fall and I lost it."
He drew away to gaze at her. "It was the same for me in that hotel room when you took those bullets. You were never a novelty to me. Never."
"Another thing, we could always fight and fuck. But what about the other? There are so many things that are…different about me."
"It's ancient history, Jonella. Both of us fought for different reasons. But it's over. I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Fuck what anyone else says or thinks. I don't care. Do you?"
She smiled a little. "Have I ever?"
He shook his head. "Nope." He kissed her again. "I need a shower. Care to join me?"
"You couldn't keep me knocked out."
* * *
Damn it. Draper wasn't happy. He had tried to come in to visit Donovan's girlfriend, but just as he was about to make his entrance, the bastard had to show up. He couldn't stay with her all day and night. There was still tomorrow. He had to move fast before Donovan found him. Draper was a man who liked to leave messages. He wished he had had time to leave one for Hilton, but it hadn't worked that way. If he hadn't been so angry with Hilton, he would have had plenty of chances for it. And now, he was running out of time. Damn it and damn it again.
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To be continued…