The One Where Ross and Rachel Tie the Knot
Disclaimer: I don't own Friends or any of the characters
Distributor: Puhlease DON'T!!! until you ask me
Spoilers: I don't think so
Chapter 1-The One With All the Surprises
Rachel knocked on the door of Ross's apartment. She had just broken up with yet another boyfriend but this time it was also one of her best friends. Some how it was different than breaking up with Ross and something told her that Ross would be able to comfort her. Emma was with Monica and Chandler, so she could talk to Ross as long as she wanted. Rain damped her hair and her mood. She started to knock again when Ross opened the door.
"Rachel! Hey, are you all right?"
"Yes, no, I don't know. I broke up with Joey."
"Oh, Rach, I'm sorry. That's too bad."
"No, no it's worse. It's just that, well, when we tried to, you know, it was uncomfortable and we didn't end up doing it." Ross shifted uncomfortably. He had loved Rachel for the past nineteen years. He had watched her cry over countless men. Every time he watched her cry over some guy, he kicked himself in the shins. If he hadn't messed up and slept with the copy girl, he and Rachel would have been married a long time ago. "Ross! Ross!"
"What?"
"I just asked you if you would mind if Emma and I moved back in with you. I think it might be a little uncomfortable with Joey."
"I'd love for you to move back in. And Emma. Of course."
"Ross, something's wrong here. You and I should be together." "You, you really think so?"
"Yes, I do. Ross, lately, I've been doing some thinking, about the way it could have been, if we'd gotten married. Ross, I want to be with you." Rachel leaned forward and kissed Ross lightly. Ross shuddered with pleasure and returned the kiss. Slowly, he pulled off Rachel's shirt as she unbuttoned his. Both of them were oblivious to the fact that Ross's windows were open.
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Monica glanced at Phoebe and Chandler. Chandler had his eyes closed and Phoebe was inspecting her hair. "Guys, we need to get Ross and Rachel back together. They belong together," Monica whined.
"What about Joey?"
"Chandler, can't you tell? Rachel doesn't really, truly want to be with Joey."
"Yeah Chandler. Ross is her lobster."
"Enough with the lobsters Pheebs, I think- Oh my God!"
"What?" Monica and Phoebe screeched.
"Rachel and Joey had a date tonight, but Ross didn't mention anything about a hot date, did he?"
"No! Why?" Monica said, exasperated.
"Because Ross just pulled off some girl's shirt."
"Do we know her?"
"Pheebs! Please, this is my brother. I do not want to hear about his sex life." "Well, let's see, Ross is on top of her, so I couldn't get a good look." Monica threw a pillow at Chandler as Phoebe stood up to look out the window with Chandler.
"Oh, it's Rachel," Phoebe stated confidently.
"What? No way. What about Emma? It can't be," Monica stuttered.
"Yet it is."
"Is what?" Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica turned around to stare at Joey.
"Amazing that the 'ebe' in Phoebe is the same even if you flip it."
"Really?"
"Uh huh. And Joey is Phoebe if you take away the 'j' and 'y' and add p, h, b, and e," Phoebe said.
"Um listen. Have you guys talked to Rachel tonight?"
"No, why?"
"Well, it's just that she's not in the apartment and we broke up tonight. She seemed kind of upset and I thought she might be over here."
"Well, she's not. Haven't seen Rachel in ages," Monica chirped.
"So if ages is a couple hours, that significantly lowers my age," Chandler quipped.
"Do you want to talk? Talking is a very expressing way to share your feelings," Phoebe added.
"No, I think I'll just go out on the balcony for awhile."
"You can't do that!"
"Why not? Thanks guys, but I don't want to talk. I think I'll just go spy on Ross. Maybe he'll actually be doing something, like having sex with a hot girl." Monica and Chandler exchanged glances.
"Okay, maybe this is like a married people's thing, but I feel really left out when nobody tells me what's going on."
"Don't worry Pheebs, they didn't say anything."
"No Joe, it's with the eyes. Like, I'll tell you, "Good evening," with my eyes and you tell me what I said." Phoebe looked into Joey's eyes very deeply. Joey leaned forward and kissed Phoebe passionately, then broke away.
"Did I get it?"
"Uh huh, come here." Phoebe wrapped her arm around Joey's neck and pulled him into another kiss. Monica and Chandler were staring at them with their jaws hanging open.
"Guys, did I miss something?"
"We're transmitting eye messages, like you and Chandler. See, watch my eyes Monica." Joey tried to give Monica a sexy glance.
"Okay, does anyone else see something very wrong with this? Joey, quit staring at my wife like that."
"Hey! See, Chandler got it. I was saying, "How you doin'?"
"Joey!"
"Thanks for trying to make me feel better. It's just that, well, I don't want to run around dating hot chicks forever. I want to have kids and stuff, you know?"
"You will Joe, I know you will."
"Thanks Pheebs." Joey eyes drifted up and he moved to kiss Phoebe again, but then something caught his eye.
"I don't believe it! I thought Ross was my best friend." Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica scooted together as they watched Joey.
"How can he? I mean what about Emma? I thought she, we just broke up and he doing her? Man, now I know how Rachel felt."
"Joey, I know you cared about Rachel, but she and Ross were meant to be together."
"Nice Monica. A textbook definition of sensitivity," Chandler said.
"Look Joey, they're done. They're putting on their clothes." Joey frowned at Monica and sat down on the couch. Chandler and Monica went by the window to talk while Phoebe sat down beside Joey.
"I know that really stinks. Ooh, I know! It's a sign. It's a sign that Rachel isn't for you. And there has got to be one woman out there who will be with you. Who knows how sweet, caring, and sensitive you are. How you always have good intentions. Someone who is perfect for you is out there, I know it!"
"Thanks Pheebs." Then Joey leaned forward and kissed Phoebe while Monica and Chandler stared at them. Monica turned towards the door when she heard a knock.
"Who is it?"
"Rachel. Monica, I need to talk to you."
"Door's open. Rachel flung the door open and started to hurry over to Monica but then she saw Joey and Phoebe.
"Joey! Joey! How could you? How could you? We just broke up!"
"Whoa ho, ho. Look who's talking! You're the one that just slept with Fred Flinstone."
"What?"
"Yeah! We saw!"
"Fred Flinstone?"
"He lived in like the Stone Age!"
"Do not call Ross that!"
"I don't believe you Rachel. I thought you would at least take sometime before throwing yourself at another guy." Joey waved his hand as he talked. Ross walked through the open door and glanced around.
"Hey guys. How was your date?" Joey glared at Ross and then punched him in the nose. Ross grabbed his nose and clenched his teeth.
"Ross! Honey, are you okay? Oh, sweetie let's get some ice on it," Rachel said, jumping up. Rachel grabbed an ice bag from the freezer and led Ross to the couch. He lay down with his head in her lap as she held the ice on his nose (picture "The One With the East German Laundry Detergant"). Joey watched and then shook his head with a hurt look in his eyes. He hurried out of the apartment and Phoebe trailed behind him. Monica and Chandler winced as they heard Joey's apartment door slam. Monica walked over to the couch and sat down in the chair.
"Rachel, Ross, we need to talk."
TBC. Please Review!!!
A/N-I have several Friends stories going right now, so please forgive me if it takes a couple days for me to post the next chapter.
Chapter 1-The One With All the Surprises
Rachel knocked on the door of Ross's apartment. She had just broken up with yet another boyfriend but this time it was also one of her best friends. Some how it was different than breaking up with Ross and something told her that Ross would be able to comfort her. Emma was with Monica and Chandler, so she could talk to Ross as long as she wanted. Rain damped her hair and her mood. She started to knock again when Ross opened the door.
"Rachel! Hey, are you all right?"
"Yes, no, I don't know. I broke up with Joey."
"Oh, Rach, I'm sorry. That's too bad."
"No, no it's worse. It's just that, well, when we tried to, you know, it was uncomfortable and we didn't end up doing it." Ross shifted uncomfortably. He had loved Rachel for the past nineteen years. He had watched her cry over countless men. Every time he watched her cry over some guy, he kicked himself in the shins. If he hadn't messed up and slept with the copy girl, he and Rachel would have been married a long time ago. "Ross! Ross!"
"What?"
"I just asked you if you would mind if Emma and I moved back in with you. I think it might be a little uncomfortable with Joey."
"I'd love for you to move back in. And Emma. Of course."
"Ross, something's wrong here. You and I should be together." "You, you really think so?"
"Yes, I do. Ross, lately, I've been doing some thinking, about the way it could have been, if we'd gotten married. Ross, I want to be with you." Rachel leaned forward and kissed Ross lightly. Ross shuddered with pleasure and returned the kiss. Slowly, he pulled off Rachel's shirt as she unbuttoned his. Both of them were oblivious to the fact that Ross's windows were open.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Monica glanced at Phoebe and Chandler. Chandler had his eyes closed and Phoebe was inspecting her hair. "Guys, we need to get Ross and Rachel back together. They belong together," Monica whined.
"What about Joey?"
"Chandler, can't you tell? Rachel doesn't really, truly want to be with Joey."
"Yeah Chandler. Ross is her lobster."
"Enough with the lobsters Pheebs, I think- Oh my God!"
"What?" Monica and Phoebe screeched.
"Rachel and Joey had a date tonight, but Ross didn't mention anything about a hot date, did he?"
"No! Why?" Monica said, exasperated.
"Because Ross just pulled off some girl's shirt."
"Do we know her?"
"Pheebs! Please, this is my brother. I do not want to hear about his sex life." "Well, let's see, Ross is on top of her, so I couldn't get a good look." Monica threw a pillow at Chandler as Phoebe stood up to look out the window with Chandler.
"Oh, it's Rachel," Phoebe stated confidently.
"What? No way. What about Emma? It can't be," Monica stuttered.
"Yet it is."
"Is what?" Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica turned around to stare at Joey.
"Amazing that the 'ebe' in Phoebe is the same even if you flip it."
"Really?"
"Uh huh. And Joey is Phoebe if you take away the 'j' and 'y' and add p, h, b, and e," Phoebe said.
"Um listen. Have you guys talked to Rachel tonight?"
"No, why?"
"Well, it's just that she's not in the apartment and we broke up tonight. She seemed kind of upset and I thought she might be over here."
"Well, she's not. Haven't seen Rachel in ages," Monica chirped.
"So if ages is a couple hours, that significantly lowers my age," Chandler quipped.
"Do you want to talk? Talking is a very expressing way to share your feelings," Phoebe added.
"No, I think I'll just go out on the balcony for awhile."
"You can't do that!"
"Why not? Thanks guys, but I don't want to talk. I think I'll just go spy on Ross. Maybe he'll actually be doing something, like having sex with a hot girl." Monica and Chandler exchanged glances.
"Okay, maybe this is like a married people's thing, but I feel really left out when nobody tells me what's going on."
"Don't worry Pheebs, they didn't say anything."
"No Joe, it's with the eyes. Like, I'll tell you, "Good evening," with my eyes and you tell me what I said." Phoebe looked into Joey's eyes very deeply. Joey leaned forward and kissed Phoebe passionately, then broke away.
"Did I get it?"
"Uh huh, come here." Phoebe wrapped her arm around Joey's neck and pulled him into another kiss. Monica and Chandler were staring at them with their jaws hanging open.
"Guys, did I miss something?"
"We're transmitting eye messages, like you and Chandler. See, watch my eyes Monica." Joey tried to give Monica a sexy glance.
"Okay, does anyone else see something very wrong with this? Joey, quit staring at my wife like that."
"Hey! See, Chandler got it. I was saying, "How you doin'?"
"Joey!"
"Thanks for trying to make me feel better. It's just that, well, I don't want to run around dating hot chicks forever. I want to have kids and stuff, you know?"
"You will Joe, I know you will."
"Thanks Pheebs." Joey eyes drifted up and he moved to kiss Phoebe again, but then something caught his eye.
"I don't believe it! I thought Ross was my best friend." Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica scooted together as they watched Joey.
"How can he? I mean what about Emma? I thought she, we just broke up and he doing her? Man, now I know how Rachel felt."
"Joey, I know you cared about Rachel, but she and Ross were meant to be together."
"Nice Monica. A textbook definition of sensitivity," Chandler said.
"Look Joey, they're done. They're putting on their clothes." Joey frowned at Monica and sat down on the couch. Chandler and Monica went by the window to talk while Phoebe sat down beside Joey.
"I know that really stinks. Ooh, I know! It's a sign. It's a sign that Rachel isn't for you. And there has got to be one woman out there who will be with you. Who knows how sweet, caring, and sensitive you are. How you always have good intentions. Someone who is perfect for you is out there, I know it!"
"Thanks Pheebs." Then Joey leaned forward and kissed Phoebe while Monica and Chandler stared at them. Monica turned towards the door when she heard a knock.
"Who is it?"
"Rachel. Monica, I need to talk to you."
"Door's open. Rachel flung the door open and started to hurry over to Monica but then she saw Joey and Phoebe.
"Joey! Joey! How could you? How could you? We just broke up!"
"Whoa ho, ho. Look who's talking! You're the one that just slept with Fred Flinstone."
"What?"
"Yeah! We saw!"
"Fred Flinstone?"
"He lived in like the Stone Age!"
"Do not call Ross that!"
"I don't believe you Rachel. I thought you would at least take sometime before throwing yourself at another guy." Joey waved his hand as he talked. Ross walked through the open door and glanced around.
"Hey guys. How was your date?" Joey glared at Ross and then punched him in the nose. Ross grabbed his nose and clenched his teeth.
"Ross! Honey, are you okay? Oh, sweetie let's get some ice on it," Rachel said, jumping up. Rachel grabbed an ice bag from the freezer and led Ross to the couch. He lay down with his head in her lap as she held the ice on his nose (picture "The One With the East German Laundry Detergant"). Joey watched and then shook his head with a hurt look in his eyes. He hurried out of the apartment and Phoebe trailed behind him. Monica and Chandler winced as they heard Joey's apartment door slam. Monica walked over to the couch and sat down in the chair.
"Rachel, Ross, we need to talk."
TBC. Please Review!!!
A/N-I have several Friends stories going right now, so please forgive me if it takes a couple days for me to post the next chapter.