A/N: fine, fine, fine. I'll write a fanfic with a different pairing,
fair? it'll be cute...i think...
NOT DONE YETTTT!!! KEEP READING~!!!!!
She plunged the dagger into the tiny beast before her, praying for forgiveness as the tiny animal whimpered before sighing its final breath. She wiped a hand across her forehead, sliding down to her cheeks, trying to convince her it was sweat that dotted her eyes, but she knew the truth. Salty beads trailed down her cheeks, mingling with the dirt on her face leaving deep grooves of pale skin through the rusty brown dust. She looked at the smeared blood and dirt on her hands, wincing as she became aware of the warm moistness on her cheeks, knowing the animal's blood was on her face. She let a tear fall down her cheek, catching on her chin, dangling before it dropped to the animal's stained, mattered fur below her.
She hefted the animal onto her shoulders, not minding the warm liquid slowly seeping down her neck, matting her hair as it trailed down her spine. The furred animal was warm, though it was rapidly cooling with death and growing stiff around her neck. Luckily, she was near the place she had made camp, and she was less than ten paces-and ten minutes-from her first hot meal in weeks. She was not a good hunter, not like her mentor, and the tiny animal hanging around her neck was a feast to her; she would not see such a good meal for many weeks to come.
She opened her mouth and sighed, licking her lips clean of dirt and sweat, her stomach growing nauseous as she did so, but aware the animal around her neck would awaken hunger in her as soon as it was hanging over her fire. She pushed herself to her feet, having a sudden urge to stay where she was and await the imminent death she deserved. She hesitated, but knew she would have to push on if there was any hope of bring him back; there was no reason for him to have died the death she had unwittingly sentenced him to. As long as blood ran through her veins, she would struggle for a way to bring him back to her.
She turned her back on the bloodstained plot of land at her feet, guilt washing over her; she had killed an animal, a baby at that, and felt nothing more than little guilt. The guilt she felt was not for killing the youngling, but for feeling no remorse, no sadness; she had become a...hunter. ::But he would be proud of me:: she thought, knowing full well a short year ago she would have blanched at the thought of killing for her dinner. ::He would have patted my head and congratulated me on becoming an adult:: She blinked off the unexpected tears before they had a chance to fall, angry at herself for being so weak.
She sniffed in the air daintily, eagerly awaiting the tangy scent of burning coals to bombard her with the familiar scent she had known to call home. But she could smell nothing other than the remnants of the fire she had made last night. She stopped in her tracks and looked around the clearing, glaring fiercely at the fire, trying to set it ablaze with her venomous glare, knowing full well that she could not. A flash of moment and the rustle of cloth on leaves alerted her and she turned around, facing the toad...thing by her feet, refocusing her glare on him, a burst of satisfaction lancing through her as he cringed in fear. "Jakken, why in the hell is the fire dead?" she yelled.
"Rin," Jakken glared back at her and tried to stretch himself out to reach Rin's height, though she stood a good four feet taller than he did. In ten years, the young woman's height had grown dramatically, an unnecessary proof of her adulthood. "I didn't let it go out on purpose. The coals died when I was busy, and I couldn't get the fire started again."
Rin glared at him, back straightening as her tone took on an accusing tone. "Oh? Then why you were you hiding?" She leaned over and shoved a slim finger in the beaky nose of Jakken. "And what were you 'busy' doing?" She snorted indignantly and straightened her back, looking away in disgust. "Nothing useful, I'm sure."
Jakken lowered his head, eyes narrowing in anger as he opened him mouth and spat at her, the blob of saliva landing scant inches from her bare feet. "Who the hell do you think you are, Rin? You're just a little orphan. I was hiding because I knew you'd tear me to shreds for allowing your precious fire to die." He turned away from her and folded his arms. "It's not my fault we don't have anymore flint. You should have stolen some; you're good at it, aren't you? Of course you are, you're a filthy thief; if late Sesshomaru-sama had any sense, he would have murdered you like the disgusting human you are."
Rin slammed her arms tightly against her sides, her face turning a bright crimson. "How dare you speak of Sesshomaru-sama like that?! You have no right to speak about him, not after that disgusting hanyou killed him! You are not worthy of mentioning his name!" Rin lifted her hand to strike him, when she realized what she was doing. ::This isn't like me; Jakken and I have fought before? Why should him mentioning Sesshomaru make it any different for me:: She knew the answer, though, and it frightened her. ::Because you-::
"Precious, Rin, the reason I was busy," Jakken's curt voice cut the string of thought her mind was trailing along behind, thankfully keeping her from admitting the truth to herself. "Was because Inuyasha came around."
Rin fell to her knees and grabbed Jakken around his throat, shaking him to emphasize her point. "What did you say?"
"Inuyasha.....was....here..." he blurted out as he tried to gulp down precious air, but was nearly unable to find enough to speak. Rin released him roughly, pushing him to the ground. "He was asking...about you."
Rin glared at Jakken suspiciously. "Now what would that trash want with me? He already got what he wanted, didn't he? Sesshomaru's dead, and there's nothing anyone can do about it." Rin found herself, once again, sporting shiny pricks of water in the corners of her eyes. Instead of blinked them away, she allowed herself to show the mind-numbing grief she could not escape, even in her dreams. "What did he want?" she repeated.
Jakken looked down at his feet, and mumbled something inaudible. Rin growled faintly, and his eyes met hers. "He wanted to know how you were, since-you know. Since IT happened." Jakken looked away once more. "He was worried about you; half-youkai means half-human, Rin. That means he has a heart."
Rin eyes Jakken warily, trying not to show how much his words bothered her by giggling gently. "Forgive me, Jakken, but it sounds like you're getting soft on me. And you can't do that anytime soon, now, can you?" Jakken looked at her, mouth agape, and shook his head dumbly. Rin smiled at him wholeheartedly and pushed herself to her feet. "Come on, Jakken. Let's fine a way to roast this thing."
Jakken peered at her shoulders intently, seeming to notice the bloody animal for the first time; he opened his eyes wide in surprise and stared at her. "Did you...kill that on your own, Rin?"
She nodded proudly. "Yup, I sure did." Her smile wavered slightly. "Shame for it to go to waste, though. Too bad there's no fire."
Jakken looked to his right hand where a knotted old staff stood erect, two heads dangling from the end. "Well, Rin, I suppose I COULD use the Staff to create a fire for us. But just this once, alright? Tomorrow we'll have to find a real way to have a fire." Rin nodded and stepped to the side, allowing Jakken to walk past her. He crouched before the fire, jumping back as flames spewed forth from the tip of his staff, igniting the charred logs to a cheerful blaze. Rin handed him the animal, marveling as he pierced its body with the stick, not seeming to notice the fact that the animal weighed more than he did.
They ate their dinner in a friendly silence and cleaned up in much the same manner, not a single word uttered between them. Rin huddled by the fire as Jakken readied himself for sleep. She stared deep into the flames, almost seeing the image of Sesshomaru as he had been before his death. A warm flittering began in her body, sending chills coursing along her spine, though her body was warm. Her eyes opened wide as she realized why it hurt so much that Sesshomaru had died-been killed.
She jumped to her feet and fell into her bedroll, trying to convince herself that she was wrong, that she was overreacting and seeking for some reason why it had felt so good when she was with Sesshomaru. She shut her eyes tightly, trying to block out all visions of Sesshomaru as he had once been, failing miserably. She could see him, as he had been almost a year ago, staring at her dumbly as the Tetsusaiga lanced through his heart, his mouth opening as he tried to force out the words he had no breath to say. He had mouthed three words, and time and again she tried to remember the shape his mouth had made, praying he had said what she had wanted to hear all along.
Her eyes snapped open as she lost the war, surrendering herself the emotion she had known for years. She opened her mouth, not knowing or caring whether Jakken was awake; surely he knew, how could he not? "I love him. I love you, Sesshomaru..." She kissed the air faintly, dimly aware of the firmness of the breeze blowing across her face. She closed her eyes gently and drifted into an uneasy sleep, filled with pictures of Sesshomaru. Of the man she loved.
NOT DONE YETTTT!!! KEEP READING~!!!!!
She plunged the dagger into the tiny beast before her, praying for forgiveness as the tiny animal whimpered before sighing its final breath. She wiped a hand across her forehead, sliding down to her cheeks, trying to convince her it was sweat that dotted her eyes, but she knew the truth. Salty beads trailed down her cheeks, mingling with the dirt on her face leaving deep grooves of pale skin through the rusty brown dust. She looked at the smeared blood and dirt on her hands, wincing as she became aware of the warm moistness on her cheeks, knowing the animal's blood was on her face. She let a tear fall down her cheek, catching on her chin, dangling before it dropped to the animal's stained, mattered fur below her.
She hefted the animal onto her shoulders, not minding the warm liquid slowly seeping down her neck, matting her hair as it trailed down her spine. The furred animal was warm, though it was rapidly cooling with death and growing stiff around her neck. Luckily, she was near the place she had made camp, and she was less than ten paces-and ten minutes-from her first hot meal in weeks. She was not a good hunter, not like her mentor, and the tiny animal hanging around her neck was a feast to her; she would not see such a good meal for many weeks to come.
She opened her mouth and sighed, licking her lips clean of dirt and sweat, her stomach growing nauseous as she did so, but aware the animal around her neck would awaken hunger in her as soon as it was hanging over her fire. She pushed herself to her feet, having a sudden urge to stay where she was and await the imminent death she deserved. She hesitated, but knew she would have to push on if there was any hope of bring him back; there was no reason for him to have died the death she had unwittingly sentenced him to. As long as blood ran through her veins, she would struggle for a way to bring him back to her.
She turned her back on the bloodstained plot of land at her feet, guilt washing over her; she had killed an animal, a baby at that, and felt nothing more than little guilt. The guilt she felt was not for killing the youngling, but for feeling no remorse, no sadness; she had become a...hunter. ::But he would be proud of me:: she thought, knowing full well a short year ago she would have blanched at the thought of killing for her dinner. ::He would have patted my head and congratulated me on becoming an adult:: She blinked off the unexpected tears before they had a chance to fall, angry at herself for being so weak.
She sniffed in the air daintily, eagerly awaiting the tangy scent of burning coals to bombard her with the familiar scent she had known to call home. But she could smell nothing other than the remnants of the fire she had made last night. She stopped in her tracks and looked around the clearing, glaring fiercely at the fire, trying to set it ablaze with her venomous glare, knowing full well that she could not. A flash of moment and the rustle of cloth on leaves alerted her and she turned around, facing the toad...thing by her feet, refocusing her glare on him, a burst of satisfaction lancing through her as he cringed in fear. "Jakken, why in the hell is the fire dead?" she yelled.
"Rin," Jakken glared back at her and tried to stretch himself out to reach Rin's height, though she stood a good four feet taller than he did. In ten years, the young woman's height had grown dramatically, an unnecessary proof of her adulthood. "I didn't let it go out on purpose. The coals died when I was busy, and I couldn't get the fire started again."
Rin glared at him, back straightening as her tone took on an accusing tone. "Oh? Then why you were you hiding?" She leaned over and shoved a slim finger in the beaky nose of Jakken. "And what were you 'busy' doing?" She snorted indignantly and straightened her back, looking away in disgust. "Nothing useful, I'm sure."
Jakken lowered his head, eyes narrowing in anger as he opened him mouth and spat at her, the blob of saliva landing scant inches from her bare feet. "Who the hell do you think you are, Rin? You're just a little orphan. I was hiding because I knew you'd tear me to shreds for allowing your precious fire to die." He turned away from her and folded his arms. "It's not my fault we don't have anymore flint. You should have stolen some; you're good at it, aren't you? Of course you are, you're a filthy thief; if late Sesshomaru-sama had any sense, he would have murdered you like the disgusting human you are."
Rin slammed her arms tightly against her sides, her face turning a bright crimson. "How dare you speak of Sesshomaru-sama like that?! You have no right to speak about him, not after that disgusting hanyou killed him! You are not worthy of mentioning his name!" Rin lifted her hand to strike him, when she realized what she was doing. ::This isn't like me; Jakken and I have fought before? Why should him mentioning Sesshomaru make it any different for me:: She knew the answer, though, and it frightened her. ::Because you-::
"Precious, Rin, the reason I was busy," Jakken's curt voice cut the string of thought her mind was trailing along behind, thankfully keeping her from admitting the truth to herself. "Was because Inuyasha came around."
Rin fell to her knees and grabbed Jakken around his throat, shaking him to emphasize her point. "What did you say?"
"Inuyasha.....was....here..." he blurted out as he tried to gulp down precious air, but was nearly unable to find enough to speak. Rin released him roughly, pushing him to the ground. "He was asking...about you."
Rin glared at Jakken suspiciously. "Now what would that trash want with me? He already got what he wanted, didn't he? Sesshomaru's dead, and there's nothing anyone can do about it." Rin found herself, once again, sporting shiny pricks of water in the corners of her eyes. Instead of blinked them away, she allowed herself to show the mind-numbing grief she could not escape, even in her dreams. "What did he want?" she repeated.
Jakken looked down at his feet, and mumbled something inaudible. Rin growled faintly, and his eyes met hers. "He wanted to know how you were, since-you know. Since IT happened." Jakken looked away once more. "He was worried about you; half-youkai means half-human, Rin. That means he has a heart."
Rin eyes Jakken warily, trying not to show how much his words bothered her by giggling gently. "Forgive me, Jakken, but it sounds like you're getting soft on me. And you can't do that anytime soon, now, can you?" Jakken looked at her, mouth agape, and shook his head dumbly. Rin smiled at him wholeheartedly and pushed herself to her feet. "Come on, Jakken. Let's fine a way to roast this thing."
Jakken peered at her shoulders intently, seeming to notice the bloody animal for the first time; he opened his eyes wide in surprise and stared at her. "Did you...kill that on your own, Rin?"
She nodded proudly. "Yup, I sure did." Her smile wavered slightly. "Shame for it to go to waste, though. Too bad there's no fire."
Jakken looked to his right hand where a knotted old staff stood erect, two heads dangling from the end. "Well, Rin, I suppose I COULD use the Staff to create a fire for us. But just this once, alright? Tomorrow we'll have to find a real way to have a fire." Rin nodded and stepped to the side, allowing Jakken to walk past her. He crouched before the fire, jumping back as flames spewed forth from the tip of his staff, igniting the charred logs to a cheerful blaze. Rin handed him the animal, marveling as he pierced its body with the stick, not seeming to notice the fact that the animal weighed more than he did.
They ate their dinner in a friendly silence and cleaned up in much the same manner, not a single word uttered between them. Rin huddled by the fire as Jakken readied himself for sleep. She stared deep into the flames, almost seeing the image of Sesshomaru as he had been before his death. A warm flittering began in her body, sending chills coursing along her spine, though her body was warm. Her eyes opened wide as she realized why it hurt so much that Sesshomaru had died-been killed.
She jumped to her feet and fell into her bedroll, trying to convince herself that she was wrong, that she was overreacting and seeking for some reason why it had felt so good when she was with Sesshomaru. She shut her eyes tightly, trying to block out all visions of Sesshomaru as he had once been, failing miserably. She could see him, as he had been almost a year ago, staring at her dumbly as the Tetsusaiga lanced through his heart, his mouth opening as he tried to force out the words he had no breath to say. He had mouthed three words, and time and again she tried to remember the shape his mouth had made, praying he had said what she had wanted to hear all along.
Her eyes snapped open as she lost the war, surrendering herself the emotion she had known for years. She opened her mouth, not knowing or caring whether Jakken was awake; surely he knew, how could he not? "I love him. I love you, Sesshomaru..." She kissed the air faintly, dimly aware of the firmness of the breeze blowing across her face. She closed her eyes gently and drifted into an uneasy sleep, filled with pictures of Sesshomaru. Of the man she loved.