Disclaimer: Harry Potter is property to the great mind of J.K. Rowling. All
of the thingies are hers. I don't own Kodak or other anime related titles.
I also don't own any of the songs I make fun of. I also don't own any of
the lyrics that I make fun of. Thank you.
A/N: I'm sorry that I haven't written in awhile I just had to think. Well for my long absence I decided to make an ultra long and extra funny one two. !
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In the hall Harry, Hermione, and Ron were discussing the event that just happened.
"I don't know what happened to me! I just lost all of control of myself." Hermione said practically screaming. She was very embarrassed that she let herself get out of control that way.
"Yes. But did you see the look on Draco's face! Absolutely stunning!" Ron said with his fist balled up in front of him like one of those ditsy anime schoolgirls.
"Complete Kodak Moment!" Harry said practically bubbling over with laughter.
Hermione rolled her eyes.
"Wait, wait." Ron said to make sure he got their attention. "Buying a wand: 14 sickles, Using that wand to put a curse on your worst enemy to make him turn into a fat pig: Detention, Humiliating Draco in front of the whole school by singing a song about a dirty little man he calls his father and not getting into trouble for it because now it's normal for people to starts bursting into song in Hogwarts: Priceless."
Not even Hermione could resist bursting into laughter at that one.
"That just goes to show that there are some things that money can't buy." Harry said adding on to what Ron had just said.
"Oh Ron, Harry, your horrible!" She said.
Just as Ron was about to take a bow Hermione stopped laughing and started frantically rummaging through her bag. She took out a piece of parchment and looked at it.
"Oh no!" Hermione sighed.
"What?" Harry asked realizing that there was something wrong.
"We only have two minutes to get to Potions and were are all the way on the fifth floor!"
"Why are we on the Fifth floor to begin with?" Ron asked corking his head a little.
"To hell if I know. We just have to make it to potions!" Hermione shouted.
Harry, Hermione, and Ron ran down the floors as fast as they could go. On the first floor they accidentally ran into a prefect going up the stairs and knocked him down. He yelled something at them that sounded much like the word "pitch" but they didn't have time to decipher what he said. Though, Harry did make a mental note that that did look like the prefect that he had previously ran over.
In the dungeons Hermione, Ron, and Harry turned left and entered the Potions room. All eyes were on them as they entered the room and sat down. Snape smiled and immediately got on their case.
"Your late again. Potter and his little list of flunkies think they can avoid being disciplined. Well I think it is time we teach Potter and his gang of groupies a lesson." Snape grinned more evilly and started rubbing his knuckles. "Oh, yes. Yessssssss. I think its time that we spend more quality 'time' together. Just you, you, you, and me. Alone. Oh yea. I can see it now." Little beads of sweat started to form at the base of his head and his left eye was started to twitch. Everybody in the room was wondering what the hell was going on.
Snape ran to the back of the room where his trunk was, unlocked it, and opened it. He started rummaging through it. "Now where are those whips and that saran wrap? Oh, I think that I still have a clean gag in here too. I know I still have something left from the last time. Ohm, yea. That Trelawney is one bad..."
"Professor, Please!" Lavender shouted. Her face had gone very pale and her hands were over her ears. Everybody else looked the same except for Pansy Parkinsons' who wore a sort of crooked smile on her face. Lavender started shaking. "Can you please get back to the lesson?"
Snape looked back over his shoulder and closed his trunk. "Oh yes, as I was saying before I got so rudely interrupted." He stood up and walked over to his cauldron and cleared his throat. "We will be making a Lappets potion. Does anyone know what a Lappets potion is?" Nobody raised their hands. Hermione was shocked at herself for not knowing.
"Oh goody goody!" Snape said jumping up and down clapping his hands. "I stumped the know-it-all Granger!" Snape straightened up. "And do you know how I stumped you?" Snape stood there waiting for an answer. Hermione shook her head.
"Good" He said with a triumphant grin. "I stumped you because the potion doesn't exist! I made it up like Poof! Out of the top of my head! Aren't I special?"
Semis muttered something within the lines of 'Yea you finally noticed?'
"Now class for this potions experiment we need: water, hair from the underoos of a wolf, unicorn tungh, and o.k. one black coat."
Time passed slow that afternoon while everybody was cut and pasting unicorn toungs and other parts that made no sense once or ever into a construction paper cauldron. Snape went around the room looking at everybody's "master pieces". When he got to Neville's he stopped and did a frownish, grin thingie.
"What his that?" Snape asked in his usual cold voice. Neville jumped in his seat realizing that Snape was there.
"Uh." Neville's face turned a bright red as his eyes darted around the room. "My potions assignment."
Snape laughed and held up a piece of paper that looked like it had been help up with some green gooey stuff that was dripping off of it. Everybody looked at it and wondered what the heck it was.
Snape sighed a winning sigh. "Neville, you should have done it differently. But what would you expect from a fat pig in a brown wig that hardly fits his head and calls himself a wizard. I have to admit, I wouldn't have expected any better."
Harry heard Malfoy snickering and flipped him a little finger signs.
Neville turned a deep pink and looked at Snape evilly. Neville stood on a stool so that he was bigger than Snape. He stamped his foot and begun.
You say I should do it differently
(Suddenly all Gryfindors stand up. Out of nowhere Fred does the drums, George has the base guitar and Ginny has the lead guitar.)
I don't necessarily agree
Stand up, Sit down, Think twice
Did you hear me ask for you advice?
Don't bother trying to tell me your beliefs
Your point of view is pretty stupped to me
Add this, pour that, on track
Do us a favor and don't talk back
Round and round but the potions lesson
Always ends where it began
Round and round and we need a vacation
We have a headache from you!
(All the Gryfindors: )
Shut up!
(All of the Slytherins run out of the room Neville again)
Don't wanna hear your voice
(All the Gryfindors: )
Shut up!
(Neville)
I'm sick of all the noise
There's nothing you can say to me to bear a dent in me
So shut up!
Blah, blah, ba, blah, ba, blah, ba, blah, blah, blah
That's what it sounds like you said to me
You nag, and you brag, and we gag
There's so much beauty in what we have
You must have better things that you can do
Or does the lesson move all around me too?
You teach what we need, oh please
We think you get off on hearing yourself speak
(Neville does that stupid KellyO. dance. if you want to call it a dance.)
Round and round but the potions lesson
Always ends where it began
Round and round and we need a vacation
We have a headache from you!
(All the Gryfindors: )
Shut up!
(Neville)
Don't wanna hear your voice
(All together now)
Shut up!
(Neville)
I'm sick of all the noise
There's nothing you can say to me that will bear a dent in me
(All the Gryffindors)
So shut up!
(Neville: )
Don't wanna do it right!
It's messed up how you always think your right
There's nothing you can say that's gonna change the way I am
(All the Gryfindors: )
So shut up!
(Everything gets quit for a moment then Ginny jumps to the middle of the room knocking Snape down and does her guitar solo. Guitar dies down and Neville starts singing again)
Round and round but the potions lesson
Always ends where it began
Round and round and we need a vacation
We have a headache from you!
(Chorus)
Everybody looks at Snape and shouts "Shut up!"
Shout outs go to::::
Remember: If you Review I write! Thank you! Also if you want a shout out just post it in review section. And if you have any story ideas put them in the review or email it to me. Thank you again and byers!
P.S. I have some other really funny story ideas for the characters. One includes Snape, and Ludacris/ or however you spell it. Remember Review!!!!!!!
A/N: I'm sorry that I haven't written in awhile I just had to think. Well for my long absence I decided to make an ultra long and extra funny one two. !
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In the hall Harry, Hermione, and Ron were discussing the event that just happened.
"I don't know what happened to me! I just lost all of control of myself." Hermione said practically screaming. She was very embarrassed that she let herself get out of control that way.
"Yes. But did you see the look on Draco's face! Absolutely stunning!" Ron said with his fist balled up in front of him like one of those ditsy anime schoolgirls.
"Complete Kodak Moment!" Harry said practically bubbling over with laughter.
Hermione rolled her eyes.
"Wait, wait." Ron said to make sure he got their attention. "Buying a wand: 14 sickles, Using that wand to put a curse on your worst enemy to make him turn into a fat pig: Detention, Humiliating Draco in front of the whole school by singing a song about a dirty little man he calls his father and not getting into trouble for it because now it's normal for people to starts bursting into song in Hogwarts: Priceless."
Not even Hermione could resist bursting into laughter at that one.
"That just goes to show that there are some things that money can't buy." Harry said adding on to what Ron had just said.
"Oh Ron, Harry, your horrible!" She said.
Just as Ron was about to take a bow Hermione stopped laughing and started frantically rummaging through her bag. She took out a piece of parchment and looked at it.
"Oh no!" Hermione sighed.
"What?" Harry asked realizing that there was something wrong.
"We only have two minutes to get to Potions and were are all the way on the fifth floor!"
"Why are we on the Fifth floor to begin with?" Ron asked corking his head a little.
"To hell if I know. We just have to make it to potions!" Hermione shouted.
Harry, Hermione, and Ron ran down the floors as fast as they could go. On the first floor they accidentally ran into a prefect going up the stairs and knocked him down. He yelled something at them that sounded much like the word "pitch" but they didn't have time to decipher what he said. Though, Harry did make a mental note that that did look like the prefect that he had previously ran over.
In the dungeons Hermione, Ron, and Harry turned left and entered the Potions room. All eyes were on them as they entered the room and sat down. Snape smiled and immediately got on their case.
"Your late again. Potter and his little list of flunkies think they can avoid being disciplined. Well I think it is time we teach Potter and his gang of groupies a lesson." Snape grinned more evilly and started rubbing his knuckles. "Oh, yes. Yessssssss. I think its time that we spend more quality 'time' together. Just you, you, you, and me. Alone. Oh yea. I can see it now." Little beads of sweat started to form at the base of his head and his left eye was started to twitch. Everybody in the room was wondering what the hell was going on.
Snape ran to the back of the room where his trunk was, unlocked it, and opened it. He started rummaging through it. "Now where are those whips and that saran wrap? Oh, I think that I still have a clean gag in here too. I know I still have something left from the last time. Ohm, yea. That Trelawney is one bad..."
"Professor, Please!" Lavender shouted. Her face had gone very pale and her hands were over her ears. Everybody else looked the same except for Pansy Parkinsons' who wore a sort of crooked smile on her face. Lavender started shaking. "Can you please get back to the lesson?"
Snape looked back over his shoulder and closed his trunk. "Oh yes, as I was saying before I got so rudely interrupted." He stood up and walked over to his cauldron and cleared his throat. "We will be making a Lappets potion. Does anyone know what a Lappets potion is?" Nobody raised their hands. Hermione was shocked at herself for not knowing.
"Oh goody goody!" Snape said jumping up and down clapping his hands. "I stumped the know-it-all Granger!" Snape straightened up. "And do you know how I stumped you?" Snape stood there waiting for an answer. Hermione shook her head.
"Good" He said with a triumphant grin. "I stumped you because the potion doesn't exist! I made it up like Poof! Out of the top of my head! Aren't I special?"
Semis muttered something within the lines of 'Yea you finally noticed?'
"Now class for this potions experiment we need: water, hair from the underoos of a wolf, unicorn tungh, and o.k. one black coat."
Time passed slow that afternoon while everybody was cut and pasting unicorn toungs and other parts that made no sense once or ever into a construction paper cauldron. Snape went around the room looking at everybody's "master pieces". When he got to Neville's he stopped and did a frownish, grin thingie.
"What his that?" Snape asked in his usual cold voice. Neville jumped in his seat realizing that Snape was there.
"Uh." Neville's face turned a bright red as his eyes darted around the room. "My potions assignment."
Snape laughed and held up a piece of paper that looked like it had been help up with some green gooey stuff that was dripping off of it. Everybody looked at it and wondered what the heck it was.
Snape sighed a winning sigh. "Neville, you should have done it differently. But what would you expect from a fat pig in a brown wig that hardly fits his head and calls himself a wizard. I have to admit, I wouldn't have expected any better."
Harry heard Malfoy snickering and flipped him a little finger signs.
Neville turned a deep pink and looked at Snape evilly. Neville stood on a stool so that he was bigger than Snape. He stamped his foot and begun.
You say I should do it differently
(Suddenly all Gryfindors stand up. Out of nowhere Fred does the drums, George has the base guitar and Ginny has the lead guitar.)
I don't necessarily agree
Stand up, Sit down, Think twice
Did you hear me ask for you advice?
Don't bother trying to tell me your beliefs
Your point of view is pretty stupped to me
Add this, pour that, on track
Do us a favor and don't talk back
Round and round but the potions lesson
Always ends where it began
Round and round and we need a vacation
We have a headache from you!
(All the Gryfindors: )
Shut up!
(All of the Slytherins run out of the room Neville again)
Don't wanna hear your voice
(All the Gryfindors: )
Shut up!
(Neville)
I'm sick of all the noise
There's nothing you can say to me to bear a dent in me
So shut up!
Blah, blah, ba, blah, ba, blah, ba, blah, blah, blah
That's what it sounds like you said to me
You nag, and you brag, and we gag
There's so much beauty in what we have
You must have better things that you can do
Or does the lesson move all around me too?
You teach what we need, oh please
We think you get off on hearing yourself speak
(Neville does that stupid KellyO. dance. if you want to call it a dance.)
Round and round but the potions lesson
Always ends where it began
Round and round and we need a vacation
We have a headache from you!
(All the Gryfindors: )
Shut up!
(Neville)
Don't wanna hear your voice
(All together now)
Shut up!
(Neville)
I'm sick of all the noise
There's nothing you can say to me that will bear a dent in me
(All the Gryffindors)
So shut up!
(Neville: )
Don't wanna do it right!
It's messed up how you always think your right
There's nothing you can say that's gonna change the way I am
(All the Gryfindors: )
So shut up!
(Everything gets quit for a moment then Ginny jumps to the middle of the room knocking Snape down and does her guitar solo. Guitar dies down and Neville starts singing again)
Round and round but the potions lesson
Always ends where it began
Round and round and we need a vacation
We have a headache from you!
(Chorus)
Everybody looks at Snape and shouts "Shut up!"
Shout outs go to::::
Remember: If you Review I write! Thank you! Also if you want a shout out just post it in review section. And if you have any story ideas put them in the review or email it to me. Thank you again and byers!
P.S. I have some other really funny story ideas for the characters. One includes Snape, and Ludacris/ or however you spell it. Remember Review!!!!!!!