Ya know that disclaimer that I'm supposed to put here? Well... a funny
thing happened the other day...
~
"WE WHAT?!" The X-men yelled loudly, causing Professor Xavier to be
propelled backwards and on to the floor.
"Yes, Principle Kelly has insisted on it." He replied calmly from his
position on the floor.
"I vould rather be locked in a closet vith I her/I," Kurt looked
sharply at Rogue. "For half an hour zhen go to-"
"Don't say it!" Kitty dove her hand in front of Kurt's mouth to prevent him
from saying it.
"Meelll." Kurt tried again, finding Kitty's hand still over his mouth.
Sighing, he stuck out his tongue against Kitty's hand.
"Like, eeewww!" Kitty shrieked drawing her hand away from Kurt's mouth and
wiping it on Mr. McCoy's shoulder. "Professor! He like, I licked me
/I!" Kurt seeing eh was free, tried again.
"Vell, I some /I of us need et more zhan zhe ozherz." Kurt shot Rogue
'that look' again.
"Elf, knock it off." Logan placed a hand on Kurt's shoulder and he backed
off.
"Well, if that's it, Scott, please drive them to the-"
"SHHHHH!!!!" They all made the shushing motion before leaving the room.
"Um... Can someone help me up... Hello?" Professor X called to the empty
room.
"Ah , the children from the Xavier Institute." A rolly lady in a florescent
pink jump suit said. "You're-"
"Shhh! Don't say it!" The X-men chorused. Ignoring them, the lady
continued.
"Group therapy, is down the hall, three doors to the left, room 304." The
X-men grumbled 'thanks' and stalked off. Who were they stalking? A ghost
of a chance, that's who.
"HI EVERYONE! MY NAME'S CANDI, AND I'M YOUR FRIEND!!!" The woman who had just identified herself as Candi cried happily when the X-Men entered the
room. Looking around, they noticed that, besides Candi, a bowl of candy, a
bunch of 'Be Happy' and 'Love Yourself' posters and a desk, and various
stuffed animals and lots of chairs, they weren't the only other ones in
the room. There were three more. A ragged man with dirty brown hair to his shoulders, and a huge over coat with various patches. A young girl of about eleven with a cow printed shirt, a cow printed back pack, jeans, a cow printed notebook and pen with a cow printed bucket hat. And lastly. A sweet old lady, dressed in a elegant purple dress that looked like it was from the 1900's, and her grey hair twisted back in an elegant bun.
"So, let's all sit down and get to know each other, so to do that, we're gonna go around in a circle and say our first name, and a animal that goes with it, and then do a motion! And then they'll copy the motions that the people before them did, and we'll just go around in a circle! Doesn't that sound fun?" Candi didn't wait for them to answer before starting. "Candi Cat!" She made little cat ears. Since no one was before her, the next man went.
"Egbert Elephant." Egbert (the man in the ratty overcoat) used his hand to make an elephants trunk. He then copied what Candi did for herself.
"Daphne Duck." Daphne, the old lady in purple flapped her arms like a duck.
"Emma Cow!" The hyper active 11-year-old stated.
"Emma, cow doesn't start with an 'e'." Candi said gently.
"Yes it does!"
"No, it doesn't!"
"If you don't agree with me, then I'll get my evil cow army to come and tear you limb from limb! Moohahaha! All hail the Cow Girls and Mary Ann!" Emma stood up on her chair and began mooing like a cow.
"Mary Ann?" Candi asked.
"Yes. Mary Ann. She is the all mighty and powerfull god! We worship her!"
"Sweetie, who are 'we'?"
"Me and my army of cows."
"Oh. Now, copy the motions of everyone before you."
"Candi Cow! Moo! Egbert Cow! Moo! Daphne Cow! Moo!" Everyone just blinked, but let her slight obsessions with cows pass.
"Jean Jackle!" Jean batted her arm like a claw.
"Scott Snake!" Scott put his hands up in front of him like he was praying, turned them so they were pointing in front of him, and wiggled them from side to side like a snake.
"Kurt Kangaroo." Kurt started hopping up and down like a kangaroo.
"Oww! Kurt, you like took mine! And so did Candi! Fine, I guess I'll just be. Kitty Karp!" Kitty then stood up and began to do the frog swim, keeping one foot on the ground. ((I.E. As Faye did in Mushroom Samba in Cowboy Bebop.))
"This isn' gonna be fun at all. Rogue. Rogue. Rogue really doesn't wanna be here." Rogue said, crossing her arms and looking stubbornly at Candi.
"Really isn't an animal." Candi said testingly.
"Ah know that you imbecile!" Rogue shouted, standing up.
"My. I see why you're here. Anger Management." Candi laughed.
"That is like, a good movie!" Kitty chirped happily.
"Shut up Kitty!" The X-Men chorused.
"How about. Rogue Rabbit? Rogue Rhino?" Candi though happily.
"Fahne. Rogue Rhino. Groooowl. Are ya happy now?" Rogue sat back down, crossed her legs and arms.
"Ooh! That is like, a really good song! Don't.. Don't just walk a way, pretending everything's okay and you don't care about me. And Iiiiiii!"
"KITTY, SHUT UP!" This time, Kitty got the message.
"Now. why are we all here?" Candi asked, smiling broadly.
"Because. I.I.. I. Am going to- I must get to the graveyard! I must!" Egbert ran up to Cindi and grabbed her by the collar of her pink and light blue striped polo shirt.
"Um. that's okay. next?" Candi asked from her position in the air.
"Well. you see. Lars' and I. **Lars is my dead husband, he died in a hunting accident. Ever since then, the neighbors started talking about us behind our backs, and I couldn't stand the vicious gossip. They said that no one hunted rabbits in their basement. Well, Lars and I did."** Daphne sat back down.
"Eermm. next?"
"Well, I'm going to speak for the rest of us. We don't know why we're here. Our principle, Edward Kelly," Jean was interrupted.
"The Edward Kelly? Wow! I think his mutant registration act sounds great! Don't you?" Candi glanced around the room. Daphne nodded.
"Mutants are evil! They must be killed!" Daphne said, pounding her fist into her open palm.
"And I. I will dig their graves. The graves of those past. the graves of those to come.." Egbert said, grinning evilly and narrowing his eyes and rubbing his hands together.
"Mary Ann is a mutant. She has the power to control all cows!" Emma giggled insanely.
"As we were saying, Mr. Kelly wants us all to research the group therapy portion of the town, and see how it's funding is." Jean said, covering up quickly. She may be Miss. Perfect, but she didn't want to be hated by all. So far, everyone seamed to like her.
"Sounds great! I think our funding is terrific! All right, who's up for a game of pass The Little Bunny Foo Foo?" Candi giggled. Everyone stood up reluctantly as she grabbed a white bunny from her endless pile of stuffed animals. "This," She gestured. "Is little bunny foo foo. And there is a song about him! Do you all know it?" No one nodded. "Well, it goes like this! Little Bunny Foo Foo, hopping though the forest, picking up some field mice, and bopping them on the head. Then down came the good fairy and said, 'I'll give you three chances, and if you don't behave, I'll turn you into a goon. And you then do the same with two chances and one chance, and then 'I warned you, so now I'm going to turn you into a goon.' And who ever has Little Bunny Foo Foo then, sits down. Doesn't that sound fun?!?" Candi asked a little too enthusiasticly. She then blew into a harmonica, and began singing and tossing the rabbit around the circle.
"Little Bunny Foo Foo! Come on! Sing with me! Little Bunny Foo Foo, hopping through the forest, scooping up some field mice, and bopping them on the head!" The song continued like this for some time, until everyone had sat down. "Oh man! Look at the time! My, how time flys when you're having fun! I can't wait to see you all again tomorrow! And before you leave, you can all have a piece of candy from Candi's Candy Bowl. Hehe! But only one!" She said, as she hopped over to the door with the bowl of candy in hand.
Once the Group Therapy room was out of sight, Kurt broke down.
"I'm sorry! I'm sooo sorry! Vhat ever did I do vrong? Vhy must I be sentenced to zis evil torture! Vhy? I'm sorry Rogue. No vone should be sentenced to zis!" He waved a hand back at the room. He then leaned on Kitty for support, sobs racking his furry blue body.
"Shh. It's okay Fuzzy. It's okay." Kitty said, patting his back awkwardly.
"Well, I don't know about you guys, but I had fun, did you Scott?" Jean asked, with perkiness to rival that of Candi's.
"Yeah! That was T-Riffic!" He said, giving a thumbs up.
"I can't wait to go again tomorrow!" Jean said, giving a double thumbs up.
"Save meh. please." Rogue muttered, as she pounded her head against the nearby wall.
"And I'm sure you'll all be delighted to hear that you only have five more sessions to complete." Professor X said, once all the X-Men had entered his private study.
"What?" Kurt, Kitty and Rogue all yelled at once.
"Yes!!!!" Scott and Jean highfived.
"Yes, and unfortunately, Logan and Ororo will be coming with you. After seeing Jean and Scott's positive outlook on the whole thing, I have decided to enroll them too." Professor X grinned evily.
"Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!" Logan and Ororo screamed as Kurt, Kitty and Rogue laughed. They had had no right to laugh at them after all the torture they had been put through, and now. now. they had to suffer through it as well. Pay back is sweet.
~
Yo ha! This was just a random thought that entered my mind one day. I hoped you liked it!
~ASGT, who has painted her toenails with a red sharpie, but now her nails look orangeish.
thing happened the other day...
~
"WE WHAT?!" The X-men yelled loudly, causing Professor Xavier to be
propelled backwards and on to the floor.
"Yes, Principle Kelly has insisted on it." He replied calmly from his
position on the floor.
"I vould rather be locked in a closet vith I her/I," Kurt looked
sharply at Rogue. "For half an hour zhen go to-"
"Don't say it!" Kitty dove her hand in front of Kurt's mouth to prevent him
from saying it.
"Meelll." Kurt tried again, finding Kitty's hand still over his mouth.
Sighing, he stuck out his tongue against Kitty's hand.
"Like, eeewww!" Kitty shrieked drawing her hand away from Kurt's mouth and
wiping it on Mr. McCoy's shoulder. "Professor! He like, I licked me
/I!" Kurt seeing eh was free, tried again.
"Vell, I some /I of us need et more zhan zhe ozherz." Kurt shot Rogue
'that look' again.
"Elf, knock it off." Logan placed a hand on Kurt's shoulder and he backed
off.
"Well, if that's it, Scott, please drive them to the-"
"SHHHHH!!!!" They all made the shushing motion before leaving the room.
"Um... Can someone help me up... Hello?" Professor X called to the empty
room.
"Ah , the children from the Xavier Institute." A rolly lady in a florescent
pink jump suit said. "You're-"
"Shhh! Don't say it!" The X-men chorused. Ignoring them, the lady
continued.
"Group therapy, is down the hall, three doors to the left, room 304." The
X-men grumbled 'thanks' and stalked off. Who were they stalking? A ghost
of a chance, that's who.
"HI EVERYONE! MY NAME'S CANDI, AND I'M YOUR FRIEND!!!" The woman who had just identified herself as Candi cried happily when the X-Men entered the
room. Looking around, they noticed that, besides Candi, a bowl of candy, a
bunch of 'Be Happy' and 'Love Yourself' posters and a desk, and various
stuffed animals and lots of chairs, they weren't the only other ones in
the room. There were three more. A ragged man with dirty brown hair to his shoulders, and a huge over coat with various patches. A young girl of about eleven with a cow printed shirt, a cow printed back pack, jeans, a cow printed notebook and pen with a cow printed bucket hat. And lastly. A sweet old lady, dressed in a elegant purple dress that looked like it was from the 1900's, and her grey hair twisted back in an elegant bun.
"So, let's all sit down and get to know each other, so to do that, we're gonna go around in a circle and say our first name, and a animal that goes with it, and then do a motion! And then they'll copy the motions that the people before them did, and we'll just go around in a circle! Doesn't that sound fun?" Candi didn't wait for them to answer before starting. "Candi Cat!" She made little cat ears. Since no one was before her, the next man went.
"Egbert Elephant." Egbert (the man in the ratty overcoat) used his hand to make an elephants trunk. He then copied what Candi did for herself.
"Daphne Duck." Daphne, the old lady in purple flapped her arms like a duck.
"Emma Cow!" The hyper active 11-year-old stated.
"Emma, cow doesn't start with an 'e'." Candi said gently.
"Yes it does!"
"No, it doesn't!"
"If you don't agree with me, then I'll get my evil cow army to come and tear you limb from limb! Moohahaha! All hail the Cow Girls and Mary Ann!" Emma stood up on her chair and began mooing like a cow.
"Mary Ann?" Candi asked.
"Yes. Mary Ann. She is the all mighty and powerfull god! We worship her!"
"Sweetie, who are 'we'?"
"Me and my army of cows."
"Oh. Now, copy the motions of everyone before you."
"Candi Cow! Moo! Egbert Cow! Moo! Daphne Cow! Moo!" Everyone just blinked, but let her slight obsessions with cows pass.
"Jean Jackle!" Jean batted her arm like a claw.
"Scott Snake!" Scott put his hands up in front of him like he was praying, turned them so they were pointing in front of him, and wiggled them from side to side like a snake.
"Kurt Kangaroo." Kurt started hopping up and down like a kangaroo.
"Oww! Kurt, you like took mine! And so did Candi! Fine, I guess I'll just be. Kitty Karp!" Kitty then stood up and began to do the frog swim, keeping one foot on the ground. ((I.E. As Faye did in Mushroom Samba in Cowboy Bebop.))
"This isn' gonna be fun at all. Rogue. Rogue. Rogue really doesn't wanna be here." Rogue said, crossing her arms and looking stubbornly at Candi.
"Really isn't an animal." Candi said testingly.
"Ah know that you imbecile!" Rogue shouted, standing up.
"My. I see why you're here. Anger Management." Candi laughed.
"That is like, a good movie!" Kitty chirped happily.
"Shut up Kitty!" The X-Men chorused.
"How about. Rogue Rabbit? Rogue Rhino?" Candi though happily.
"Fahne. Rogue Rhino. Groooowl. Are ya happy now?" Rogue sat back down, crossed her legs and arms.
"Ooh! That is like, a really good song! Don't.. Don't just walk a way, pretending everything's okay and you don't care about me. And Iiiiiii!"
"KITTY, SHUT UP!" This time, Kitty got the message.
"Now. why are we all here?" Candi asked, smiling broadly.
"Because. I.I.. I. Am going to- I must get to the graveyard! I must!" Egbert ran up to Cindi and grabbed her by the collar of her pink and light blue striped polo shirt.
"Um. that's okay. next?" Candi asked from her position in the air.
"Well. you see. Lars' and I. **Lars is my dead husband, he died in a hunting accident. Ever since then, the neighbors started talking about us behind our backs, and I couldn't stand the vicious gossip. They said that no one hunted rabbits in their basement. Well, Lars and I did."** Daphne sat back down.
"Eermm. next?"
"Well, I'm going to speak for the rest of us. We don't know why we're here. Our principle, Edward Kelly," Jean was interrupted.
"The Edward Kelly? Wow! I think his mutant registration act sounds great! Don't you?" Candi glanced around the room. Daphne nodded.
"Mutants are evil! They must be killed!" Daphne said, pounding her fist into her open palm.
"And I. I will dig their graves. The graves of those past. the graves of those to come.." Egbert said, grinning evilly and narrowing his eyes and rubbing his hands together.
"Mary Ann is a mutant. She has the power to control all cows!" Emma giggled insanely.
"As we were saying, Mr. Kelly wants us all to research the group therapy portion of the town, and see how it's funding is." Jean said, covering up quickly. She may be Miss. Perfect, but she didn't want to be hated by all. So far, everyone seamed to like her.
"Sounds great! I think our funding is terrific! All right, who's up for a game of pass The Little Bunny Foo Foo?" Candi giggled. Everyone stood up reluctantly as she grabbed a white bunny from her endless pile of stuffed animals. "This," She gestured. "Is little bunny foo foo. And there is a song about him! Do you all know it?" No one nodded. "Well, it goes like this! Little Bunny Foo Foo, hopping though the forest, picking up some field mice, and bopping them on the head. Then down came the good fairy and said, 'I'll give you three chances, and if you don't behave, I'll turn you into a goon. And you then do the same with two chances and one chance, and then 'I warned you, so now I'm going to turn you into a goon.' And who ever has Little Bunny Foo Foo then, sits down. Doesn't that sound fun?!?" Candi asked a little too enthusiasticly. She then blew into a harmonica, and began singing and tossing the rabbit around the circle.
"Little Bunny Foo Foo! Come on! Sing with me! Little Bunny Foo Foo, hopping through the forest, scooping up some field mice, and bopping them on the head!" The song continued like this for some time, until everyone had sat down. "Oh man! Look at the time! My, how time flys when you're having fun! I can't wait to see you all again tomorrow! And before you leave, you can all have a piece of candy from Candi's Candy Bowl. Hehe! But only one!" She said, as she hopped over to the door with the bowl of candy in hand.
Once the Group Therapy room was out of sight, Kurt broke down.
"I'm sorry! I'm sooo sorry! Vhat ever did I do vrong? Vhy must I be sentenced to zis evil torture! Vhy? I'm sorry Rogue. No vone should be sentenced to zis!" He waved a hand back at the room. He then leaned on Kitty for support, sobs racking his furry blue body.
"Shh. It's okay Fuzzy. It's okay." Kitty said, patting his back awkwardly.
"Well, I don't know about you guys, but I had fun, did you Scott?" Jean asked, with perkiness to rival that of Candi's.
"Yeah! That was T-Riffic!" He said, giving a thumbs up.
"I can't wait to go again tomorrow!" Jean said, giving a double thumbs up.
"Save meh. please." Rogue muttered, as she pounded her head against the nearby wall.
"And I'm sure you'll all be delighted to hear that you only have five more sessions to complete." Professor X said, once all the X-Men had entered his private study.
"What?" Kurt, Kitty and Rogue all yelled at once.
"Yes!!!!" Scott and Jean highfived.
"Yes, and unfortunately, Logan and Ororo will be coming with you. After seeing Jean and Scott's positive outlook on the whole thing, I have decided to enroll them too." Professor X grinned evily.
"Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!" Logan and Ororo screamed as Kurt, Kitty and Rogue laughed. They had had no right to laugh at them after all the torture they had been put through, and now. now. they had to suffer through it as well. Pay back is sweet.
~
Yo ha! This was just a random thought that entered my mind one day. I hoped you liked it!
~ASGT, who has painted her toenails with a red sharpie, but now her nails look orangeish.