Title: Shattered
Category: J/S M/S
Author: SunReyes ;)
Rating: PG
Summary: Samantha's having trouble dealing with it being over.
Spoilers: The Bus; FO; AYNOHYEB
Acknowledgements: This is my first WAT fanfic. I've written tons of X- Files stories, but I'm venturing out. I love this show ( As you know, I don't own the characters or anything else related to the show. I'm in this purely for entertainment purposes.
I'm torn. Torn between two worlds, two lives, two fates. I've loved when I shouldn't have and lost when I should have. It's a crime, to be broken into so many pieces; twisted into so many knots. What I wouldn't give to take it all back. Free myself of this unquestionable burden that hangs over my head.
Jack is back with his wife and I'm left alone. What was I thinking? He'd leave her for me? Who was I kidding? He's even told me how he considers himself a fan of marriage. He's got two kids and I wonder if that's why he stays with her.
I shake my head in disgust. I feel so disgusted with myself. It's not just the emotional pain I've been tormented with, but the physical pain too.
Physical Therapy helps with my leg but it only adds more grave pain when I'm not up to par. I don't know how to grieve for myself. Instead I sit miserably around in my home, dismissed from work and tired as hell. I want to go back, have one last talk with Jack. I know he told me it's over but I need to know. I don't want it to be over. I want to feel something again. I do feel, but it's all bitterness. Bitterness towards the job, towards my own life, and slowly towards Jack. I don't want to feel that way. I still care for him. Too much more then I should.
I find my way back to the office, feeling lost and confused. I don't know what I'm doing or what I even plan on saying. Maybe if I could lift the burden, release the load. I feel so tired and desolate.
I see Martin and feel myself being pulled in different directions. It's so funny how the things you always want in life change when you get older. Maybe it's the experiences that change us. If it is, can we step foot on another path and change the way our life's heading? Is that really what I want to do? I have no idea.
I'm so tired. So depressed. I could close my eyes and sleep for years. I don't want to though. Sleeping only makes me think about him. I shouldn't but I do. My mind rakes through the possibilities as I glance towards Jack's office, he's not there.
I let out a breath glancing back at Martin. I'm sure he knows what I've really come down here for. I've tried to hide what's been going on, but does it matter anymore? After all it is over. Maybe I need a friend just this once. A shoulder to lean on. I definitely could use that.
The End.
Category: J/S M/S
Author: SunReyes ;)
Rating: PG
Summary: Samantha's having trouble dealing with it being over.
Spoilers: The Bus; FO; AYNOHYEB
Acknowledgements: This is my first WAT fanfic. I've written tons of X- Files stories, but I'm venturing out. I love this show ( As you know, I don't own the characters or anything else related to the show. I'm in this purely for entertainment purposes.
I'm torn. Torn between two worlds, two lives, two fates. I've loved when I shouldn't have and lost when I should have. It's a crime, to be broken into so many pieces; twisted into so many knots. What I wouldn't give to take it all back. Free myself of this unquestionable burden that hangs over my head.
Jack is back with his wife and I'm left alone. What was I thinking? He'd leave her for me? Who was I kidding? He's even told me how he considers himself a fan of marriage. He's got two kids and I wonder if that's why he stays with her.
I shake my head in disgust. I feel so disgusted with myself. It's not just the emotional pain I've been tormented with, but the physical pain too.
Physical Therapy helps with my leg but it only adds more grave pain when I'm not up to par. I don't know how to grieve for myself. Instead I sit miserably around in my home, dismissed from work and tired as hell. I want to go back, have one last talk with Jack. I know he told me it's over but I need to know. I don't want it to be over. I want to feel something again. I do feel, but it's all bitterness. Bitterness towards the job, towards my own life, and slowly towards Jack. I don't want to feel that way. I still care for him. Too much more then I should.
I find my way back to the office, feeling lost and confused. I don't know what I'm doing or what I even plan on saying. Maybe if I could lift the burden, release the load. I feel so tired and desolate.
I see Martin and feel myself being pulled in different directions. It's so funny how the things you always want in life change when you get older. Maybe it's the experiences that change us. If it is, can we step foot on another path and change the way our life's heading? Is that really what I want to do? I have no idea.
I'm so tired. So depressed. I could close my eyes and sleep for years. I don't want to though. Sleeping only makes me think about him. I shouldn't but I do. My mind rakes through the possibilities as I glance towards Jack's office, he's not there.
I let out a breath glancing back at Martin. I'm sure he knows what I've really come down here for. I've tried to hide what's been going on, but does it matter anymore? After all it is over. Maybe I need a friend just this once. A shoulder to lean on. I definitely could use that.
The End.