Chapter 23 and three quarters
Authors notes:
(sorry if you thought this was going to be a chapter – chapter 24 will be up very soon.)
Since ff.net appears to have deleted the reviews for Chapt 22, would you - lovely – reviewers mind redoing them? They are given below so you won't have to think again or re-read……????
Thank you in advance. They are so precious to me, and I feel I need all I can get!
Superwitch
The following reviews have been submitted to: The Coiled Splendour Chapter: 22
From: rickfan37
This was wonderful. I loved the cleansing ritual in the bathroom (and what a
hedonist old Albus is, LOL!). It was so affecting, and mysterious. I adored the
way it so obviously moved Elrin, and the different facets of him that each part
of the ritual brought to mind. And the formality of his coming to claim her,
and the words they had to speak, all absolutely in keeping with the mood of this
entire story, and so very, very right, and convincing. Yes, I believe it WOULD
be like that in their world, and I envy and am in awe of your ability to
transcend 'real life' in order to write with such feeling and spirituality. I
had not even begun to think along these lines when writing my own wedding
scenes. You have a wonderful imagination which I cannot hope to emulate myself,
being too bogged down in pragmatism. His power and strength are overwhelming
in this chapter, and her submission to him and reaction to his closeness simply
breathtaking. God, wouldn't we all feel like Elrin, but you describe him so
well! And yet underlying the whole chapter is such a sense of doom...I feel
very anxious for them now, because of the burglary attempt, Malfoy, the dream,
the potion she has to decide whether or not to take...argh! Post 23 soon!
From: Arachne's Child
"Do you wish to be taken?" Ye Gods, yes! (see, I finally got in and posted!)
Wonderful ritual, SW! You've got a wonderful way of expressing Elrin's thoughts,
doubts, and joys, so that we can see things as she sees them. I particularly
love the way she's having to deal with the dilemma of the Patriarchium potion,
and having to confront the level of her trust in Severus' potions ability. Love
does not always equal trust, and this will be an extra stretch for her. Let's
hope that "all will be well" - glad you put that in there.
From: Ardelle Doch Ghayf
That was so lovely, this chapter was really poetic especially near the end when
she was consoling herself that everything was going to be ok. It's a tale thats
blooming at a steady rate and I cannot wait for the climax. Your brill, thanks
for making me smile.
From: messenger
Oh Thank you for your update I have been waiting!! It was wonderful and I love
all the ritual "stuff" and the details of him coming for her and seeing her.
Please help them this is so sad, this struggle they are going through I hope you
have this all mapped out so they get together and live happily ever after?
Please... Thanks,Kim
From: Ezmerelda
Wow. Great imagery in this chapter. I think I recognize the bathing ritual,
but I won't guess, since I'm not sure, and it might offend somebody. You
captured her tortured thoughts very well, on the one hand, she loves and trusts
Severus, on the other, she is afraid of losing herself. Actually, take out the
potion and the magic, and you have ordinary feelings of a new bride, at least
that's how I felt...Thanks for writing!
From: Ramona()
Brilliant. This was worth waiting for. Please more...
From: hawaii5063
Excellent story. It is very difficult to write a good noncanon character, but
you have done it. I really like Elrin and the entire speaking Phoniex thing is a
great invention. I like your Severus too. You write tremendously good sex scenes
as well. Keep the story going - I can't wait to see how it all concludes!