Lizard: 'k, quick recap. The gang entered a forest and encountered two
demons, a kitsune youkai named Kozu and another demon named Kaku. Chaos
ensued when Kozu appeared, hugging Rinku, and totally freakin' him out.
Meanwhile, Kaku defeats Kuwabara in a duel and is getting ready to fight
Hiei next... So, here goes. Don't forget we don't own YYH, only ourselves,
and don't forget to look up Emma (Penname: Kakurell)! (Hey, I didn't say
yay! Yay!)
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Soul Shadows---Chapter Two: A Trap is Sprung
*Hiei and Kaku stand in the middle of a clearing with Jin, Rinku, Touya, Kozu, Kurama, Botan, Keiko, and Yusuke watching. Yukina is opposite them healing Kuwabara's acid burns.*
Kaku: Very well, then. Let's go, Hiei
Hiei: Fine.
Kaku: *draws sword and gets in battle stance* This will be amusing. *Smirks*
Kozu: *looks at Hiei, dangling in Kurama's grip* Whoa! That's a compliment comin' from her, Hiei! *looks up at Kurama* She never says anythin' is amusin'! ^_^
Kurama: Um... Kozu, is it? I'd like to know how you both know everybody's names. Kakurell seems quite farmiliar with Hiei as well.
Kozu: O.O Um... eh-heh? ^_^' it's funny, really, but-
Kaku: *eyes glow red* KOZUYE!!!
Kozu: O.O *blinks and covers mouth, but keeps talking* Mff-mm!
Kaku: *returns gaze at Hiei* Never mind her. Let's fight, then!
Hiei: *gets into battle stance as well* Fool, I've been saying that the entire time. *Uses lightning speed to run towards Kaku and brings his sword high above his head, bringing it down almost instantly*
Kurama: *looks amazed at what he sees* Hiei!
*Kaku is standing behind Hiei, who is looking at the ground with his sword buried in the dirt, amazed that he had missed.*
Yusuke: That can't be good...o.o
Kurama: Their speed is equally matched!
Kaku: *smirks and chuckles* Kurama is right. Looks like we'll have a fair fight after all, eh Hiei? *evil grin*
Kuwabara: *unconscious* Careful, shorty...
Yukina: *watching the the fight* Oh my...
Hiei: *Spins around and takes a step back to put some distance between them both*
Kozu: Um...Kurama? Could you put me down please? My feet are falling asleep...
Kurama: *places Kozu down and kneels down, to meet her height* Did you know that she could do that?
Kozu: Oh, yeah! I can do it too!...Though I'm faster than her...*pouts*... She says I'm not, but I always win the races! *whispers* She doesn't like it when people are better than her. 'Specially people who take a human form. She really hates humans.
Kurama: *steps away from Kozu* You can move at that speed as well?!
Kozu: Yep! ^_^
Yusuke: Oh, man...we're in trouble...
Kaku: What? *looks at Kurama* You think we can travel through this entire forest just by walking? You obviously don't make very good observations. *eyes narrowed and she turns to Hiei*
Hiei: *grabs sword out of the ground and once more swings down at Kaku's head*
Kaku: *rolls eyes* Oh please...*grabs sword between her palms, stopping Hiei's swing, and twists her body so the blade breaks in two. She tosses the broken end aside and pops her knuckles* Hard swing, that one. That actually took effort to break it. *Her hand is slightly bleeding, and she rubs them both together, smearing blood all over her hands*
Hiei: *stares at his broken sword in awe, then tosses it aside as well, and holds his fists out in fromt of him* DOUBLE FISTS OF THE MORTAL FLAME!! *His hands glow, surrounded by a yellow flame, and he charges, once again, towards Kakurell*
Kurama: Hiei must not be pleased to be using that move on the first few attacks...
Kozu: *smirks* Heh! Too easy for Kaku! I can do that too...er...I could try... ^_^'
Kurama: *looks worriedly at Hiei* 'I'm not sure this is your fight to win, Hiei '
Kaku: Hm. You're so predictable. *holds out her now completely reddened hands and braces herself* You might as well surrender.
Hiei: *snarls* Death comes before surrender! *He comes in, with astonishing speed, punching viciously, then takes a step back looking at a hunched over Kakurell* Feh. Too easy.
Kaku: *straightens up, hands now clean, looking unfazed*
Everyone except Kaku, Hiei, and Kozu: *gapes at Kaku*
Kozu: Sheesh, Kaku... You're enjoying this, aren't you?...That's just cruel...*shudders*
Kaku: *smiles coldly and calmly brushes some dirt off of her pants* Look at your hands, Hiei.
Hiei: *raises his hands and clenches his teeth. His hands are covered in Kaku's blood and the pain is immense* Hn. It's n-nothing... *He moves his hand slightly and staggers back, the pain growing the more he moves his hands. He falls to his knees.*
Kaku: *puts on a straight face* Oh...I suppose I used too much that time. Oh well. You can't pick anything up now...The pain would nearly kill you if you used that Dragon of the Darkness Flame attack of yours, too...
Hiei: *clenching and unclenching fists, teeth gritted* I've... not... lost...
Kaku: *shrugs* Of course you have. *kneels beside Hiei and a hint of worry crosses her face* I did use too much. Damn. I guess it's because I've never had a chance to use that attack before. *the worry passes, returns to lean against a tree, still intently staring at Hiei*
Botan: *eyes wide* Oh my! She... she won!
Touya: *studies Hiei* I'd say a little more than beat...
Keiko: *grabs Yusuke's arm and pulls desparately* Yusuke... please don't fight her! You'll die, again! *bites lip and hugs his arm tighter*
Yusuke: *paralyzed, partly in awe and partly because Keiko has his arm * Dammit! *shifts gaze to Kakurell, knowing he probably will have to fight her* She's too strong... No one without Spirit Energy could possibly be that strong...
Kurama: *standing away from the others, murmurs* That attack of hers! It seemed specifically designed for Hiei! It's preventing him from using his special attacks! So it is as I suspected. They have been watching us.
Kozu:*ears twitch, and she turns to Kurama* Duh! Kaku's been waitin' for this forever! That was the whole point of her draggin' me here, to lure you and prob'ly the others out.
Kurama: *puzzled* Why would you of all people lure me out?
Kozu: Ep! I said too much again! *recovers mouth* Hmm? *blinks, then leaps into a tree branch above*
*The bushes rustle behind them and a red-eyed reptilian demon leaps out. It is black with spikes down its back and stands on its hind legs, tongue lolling out*
Demon: Mmm, dinner!
Yusuke: What the- *backs up and bumps into Jin*
Kurama: *eyes flash suddenly* It's a decoy! *whips around*
Touya: What? *turns and ducks as an arrow zooms by his head and notches in a tree behind him. Clumps with the others*
Demon: Don't forget about me now! *pounces at Touya and Kurama, the closest of the group*
Rinku: Watch out! *runs toward the others and reaches for his yo-yos*
Demon: Heh. *smirks as its tail lashes out and smacks Rinku back into a tree*
Rinku: Mmhn... *is knocked unconcious by the blow and sinks to the ground*
Jin: A hasty one, eh? Urameshi? *grins*
Yusuke: With pleasure. *holds out his arm* Spirit Gun!
Demon: *latches his claws onto Yusuke's arm and twists it so the Spirit Gun is fire off into the sky* Now you die! *raises its claws, spittle flying everywhere*
Yusuke: As if I didn't see that coming? *punches the demon in the stomach with his left arm*
Demon: Eh? *coughs and leaps backwards* You can't hold me foreve-- EEEEEEEEEEEE! *screams like nails on chalkboard and crashes to the ground, eyes glazed over and a hole bored through its back.
Jin: Piece o' cake!
Yusuke: I missed on purpose, idiot. Jin caused the wind to blow it back at you, not that I couldn't have beat you point blank but... *winks at Jin*
Jin: *winks back*
Touya: *sharply* Stop gloating over that low class, Urameshi.
Kurama: Yes, it would appear the decoy did its job quite well.
Yusuke: Wha-? *notices a stringy substance gathering in a sphere around the five, looking much like the attack Rando used*
Kurama: We are trapped.
Touya: So it would seem. *sits and closes his eyes*
Yusuke: So what are we gonna do about it?
Touya: *opens one eye and shoots an icy glare at Yusuke and Jin* Don't you think it would be wiser to find the source first?
Yusuke: *indignantly* Well, excuse me Mr. Bigshot, why don't you think of a way out.
Jin: Now, Urameshi...
*They look out the side of the cage. The girls have wisely backed off aways while Kaku leans against a tree, watching. Hiei is still on the ground, fighting the acid and Kuwabara is unconcious. Kozu is in a tree branch above, hanging upside down with her knees while investigating the top of cage.*
Yusuke: *irritatedly* Doesn't look like we're getting any outside help. Guess we'll just hafta bust out. *powers up his Spirit Gun again*
Voice: I wouldn't recommend that. *Yukina, Botan, Keiko, and the imprisoned boys turn to look. Kaku gazes at the new figure out of the corner of her eyes, and Kozu swings up onto the branch to watch*
Yusuke: Hello. *lowers his gun a little, studying the figure warily*
*The figure is wearing a maroon sleeveless shirt, a red sash, a pair of black leggings with straps under the feet, and is barefoot. She is about Yusuke's height with short black hair that barely reaches her neck and amber cat eyes*
Girl: *walks to the edge of the forcefield and says calmly* If you do shoot off your Spirit Gun, it will only reflect off the force field back at you and your friends. We wouldn't want you getting hurt would we?
Yusuke: Is that so. *raises his Spirit Gun again*
Touya: Fool. *grabs Yusuke's arm* It's too risky.
Yusuke: *insistantly* She's lying.
Kurama: *calmly* She's not. Look at her eyes, not a spark of fear. We truly are caught.
Girl: *laughs* An excellent deduction, Kurama. Now unless one of your friends, *indicates, Hiei, Kuwabara, Kaku, and the girls* can help you, I believe we'll be leaving now. *turns, and the cage rises into the air behind her*
Kozu: *standing in front of her, arms crossed* You're a bad person, aren't you?
Girl: *startled, then pretends to be hurt* Why would you say that?
Kozu: Cause good people don't take things that don't belong to them. And if you hurt someone, you hafta 'poligize.
Girl: *smiles* My, my, then I must be a bad person, don't you think? And I suppose if I am a... "bad person", disposing of you would be something I would do?
Kozu: *shrugs* You could try, sure. Let's play.
Girl: Very well. *points the fingers of her right hand at Kozu and shoots out more of the stringy substance* I don't know why I'm wasting my time on you, child. When you die, don't forget this is your own fault.
Kozu: *standing behind her, whistling* Y'know, dying sounds interesting, cause I'd be invisible and stuff, but not today, 'k?
Girl: *turns, surprised*
Kozu: *seeing her shock* Sorry, was that s'possed to hit me? I don't think it worked too well. So, you've had a try. My turn! *fires a small orb of spirit energy at the girl*
*The girl disappears, as does the cage, dropping the five boys to the ground. Rinku wakes up*
Kozu: *lowers her arms* Game over!
Kurama: Of course, she was an illusion!
Kozu: 'Course! Since she was, whoever controlled her couldn't make her react quickly enough. If they were here, they coulda seen I had dodged and shifted their attack. *points over the boys' shoulders* The lizard was a puppet. *glances at Rinku* Here, drink this. *tosses him a small bottle* It'll heal you.
Rinku: *drinks and makes a face*
Touya: *is investigating the body, then notices the arrow lodged in the tree and pulls it out* Our friend has left us a message. *removes the piece of paper from the arrow and hands it to Kurama* Read.
Kurama: *reads out loud* "Done the fight, but not the war. To the victor go the spoils. Shadows will rise up once more. Beware of friends no longer loyal"...
******************************************************************* Lizard: Yay, suspense! Now you will hafta wait till the next chapter comes!
Emma: -.-' Right...
Lizard: We're workin' on it tho'. Be proud of us cuz we have a bunch of homework, too! Please review, I'm sorry if anyones out of character, I have a hard time with some, Jin especially. His speech is so hard!
Emma: Next time is going to be interesting. You'll find out if Hiei can
survive Kaku's assault... She wouldn't dare kill him...
Lizard: *coughs* Actually, she prob'ly would.
Emma: NOOOOOO! *puts necklace like Inu Yasha'a around Kaku's neck* Stay!
*runs off, dragging Hiei behind*
Lizard: ... That was weird... But like she said, you'll discover the result of the battle as Hiei makes his last stand. Not that he's really standing anymore... *gets pummeled by Hiei fans* Its Emma's fault, not mine! Eventually, they're gonna get out of this dumb forest, I hope... Oh yeah, I'm s'possed to ask you to read and review Emma's poem and my other ones too. Lastly, Chu isn't here cuz he's busy bein' drunk somewheres an' Rinku couldn't get him to come. (In other words, Emma and I have no idea how to have him actually be himself...)
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Soul Shadows---Chapter Two: A Trap is Sprung
*Hiei and Kaku stand in the middle of a clearing with Jin, Rinku, Touya, Kozu, Kurama, Botan, Keiko, and Yusuke watching. Yukina is opposite them healing Kuwabara's acid burns.*
Kaku: Very well, then. Let's go, Hiei
Hiei: Fine.
Kaku: *draws sword and gets in battle stance* This will be amusing. *Smirks*
Kozu: *looks at Hiei, dangling in Kurama's grip* Whoa! That's a compliment comin' from her, Hiei! *looks up at Kurama* She never says anythin' is amusin'! ^_^
Kurama: Um... Kozu, is it? I'd like to know how you both know everybody's names. Kakurell seems quite farmiliar with Hiei as well.
Kozu: O.O Um... eh-heh? ^_^' it's funny, really, but-
Kaku: *eyes glow red* KOZUYE!!!
Kozu: O.O *blinks and covers mouth, but keeps talking* Mff-mm!
Kaku: *returns gaze at Hiei* Never mind her. Let's fight, then!
Hiei: *gets into battle stance as well* Fool, I've been saying that the entire time. *Uses lightning speed to run towards Kaku and brings his sword high above his head, bringing it down almost instantly*
Kurama: *looks amazed at what he sees* Hiei!
*Kaku is standing behind Hiei, who is looking at the ground with his sword buried in the dirt, amazed that he had missed.*
Yusuke: That can't be good...o.o
Kurama: Their speed is equally matched!
Kaku: *smirks and chuckles* Kurama is right. Looks like we'll have a fair fight after all, eh Hiei? *evil grin*
Kuwabara: *unconscious* Careful, shorty...
Yukina: *watching the the fight* Oh my...
Hiei: *Spins around and takes a step back to put some distance between them both*
Kozu: Um...Kurama? Could you put me down please? My feet are falling asleep...
Kurama: *places Kozu down and kneels down, to meet her height* Did you know that she could do that?
Kozu: Oh, yeah! I can do it too!...Though I'm faster than her...*pouts*... She says I'm not, but I always win the races! *whispers* She doesn't like it when people are better than her. 'Specially people who take a human form. She really hates humans.
Kurama: *steps away from Kozu* You can move at that speed as well?!
Kozu: Yep! ^_^
Yusuke: Oh, man...we're in trouble...
Kaku: What? *looks at Kurama* You think we can travel through this entire forest just by walking? You obviously don't make very good observations. *eyes narrowed and she turns to Hiei*
Hiei: *grabs sword out of the ground and once more swings down at Kaku's head*
Kaku: *rolls eyes* Oh please...*grabs sword between her palms, stopping Hiei's swing, and twists her body so the blade breaks in two. She tosses the broken end aside and pops her knuckles* Hard swing, that one. That actually took effort to break it. *Her hand is slightly bleeding, and she rubs them both together, smearing blood all over her hands*
Hiei: *stares at his broken sword in awe, then tosses it aside as well, and holds his fists out in fromt of him* DOUBLE FISTS OF THE MORTAL FLAME!! *His hands glow, surrounded by a yellow flame, and he charges, once again, towards Kakurell*
Kurama: Hiei must not be pleased to be using that move on the first few attacks...
Kozu: *smirks* Heh! Too easy for Kaku! I can do that too...er...I could try... ^_^'
Kurama: *looks worriedly at Hiei* 'I'm not sure this is your fight to win, Hiei '
Kaku: Hm. You're so predictable. *holds out her now completely reddened hands and braces herself* You might as well surrender.
Hiei: *snarls* Death comes before surrender! *He comes in, with astonishing speed, punching viciously, then takes a step back looking at a hunched over Kakurell* Feh. Too easy.
Kaku: *straightens up, hands now clean, looking unfazed*
Everyone except Kaku, Hiei, and Kozu: *gapes at Kaku*
Kozu: Sheesh, Kaku... You're enjoying this, aren't you?...That's just cruel...*shudders*
Kaku: *smiles coldly and calmly brushes some dirt off of her pants* Look at your hands, Hiei.
Hiei: *raises his hands and clenches his teeth. His hands are covered in Kaku's blood and the pain is immense* Hn. It's n-nothing... *He moves his hand slightly and staggers back, the pain growing the more he moves his hands. He falls to his knees.*
Kaku: *puts on a straight face* Oh...I suppose I used too much that time. Oh well. You can't pick anything up now...The pain would nearly kill you if you used that Dragon of the Darkness Flame attack of yours, too...
Hiei: *clenching and unclenching fists, teeth gritted* I've... not... lost...
Kaku: *shrugs* Of course you have. *kneels beside Hiei and a hint of worry crosses her face* I did use too much. Damn. I guess it's because I've never had a chance to use that attack before. *the worry passes, returns to lean against a tree, still intently staring at Hiei*
Botan: *eyes wide* Oh my! She... she won!
Touya: *studies Hiei* I'd say a little more than beat...
Keiko: *grabs Yusuke's arm and pulls desparately* Yusuke... please don't fight her! You'll die, again! *bites lip and hugs his arm tighter*
Yusuke: *paralyzed, partly in awe and partly because Keiko has his arm * Dammit! *shifts gaze to Kakurell, knowing he probably will have to fight her* She's too strong... No one without Spirit Energy could possibly be that strong...
Kurama: *standing away from the others, murmurs* That attack of hers! It seemed specifically designed for Hiei! It's preventing him from using his special attacks! So it is as I suspected. They have been watching us.
Kozu:*ears twitch, and she turns to Kurama* Duh! Kaku's been waitin' for this forever! That was the whole point of her draggin' me here, to lure you and prob'ly the others out.
Kurama: *puzzled* Why would you of all people lure me out?
Kozu: Ep! I said too much again! *recovers mouth* Hmm? *blinks, then leaps into a tree branch above*
*The bushes rustle behind them and a red-eyed reptilian demon leaps out. It is black with spikes down its back and stands on its hind legs, tongue lolling out*
Demon: Mmm, dinner!
Yusuke: What the- *backs up and bumps into Jin*
Kurama: *eyes flash suddenly* It's a decoy! *whips around*
Touya: What? *turns and ducks as an arrow zooms by his head and notches in a tree behind him. Clumps with the others*
Demon: Don't forget about me now! *pounces at Touya and Kurama, the closest of the group*
Rinku: Watch out! *runs toward the others and reaches for his yo-yos*
Demon: Heh. *smirks as its tail lashes out and smacks Rinku back into a tree*
Rinku: Mmhn... *is knocked unconcious by the blow and sinks to the ground*
Jin: A hasty one, eh? Urameshi? *grins*
Yusuke: With pleasure. *holds out his arm* Spirit Gun!
Demon: *latches his claws onto Yusuke's arm and twists it so the Spirit Gun is fire off into the sky* Now you die! *raises its claws, spittle flying everywhere*
Yusuke: As if I didn't see that coming? *punches the demon in the stomach with his left arm*
Demon: Eh? *coughs and leaps backwards* You can't hold me foreve-- EEEEEEEEEEEE! *screams like nails on chalkboard and crashes to the ground, eyes glazed over and a hole bored through its back.
Jin: Piece o' cake!
Yusuke: I missed on purpose, idiot. Jin caused the wind to blow it back at you, not that I couldn't have beat you point blank but... *winks at Jin*
Jin: *winks back*
Touya: *sharply* Stop gloating over that low class, Urameshi.
Kurama: Yes, it would appear the decoy did its job quite well.
Yusuke: Wha-? *notices a stringy substance gathering in a sphere around the five, looking much like the attack Rando used*
Kurama: We are trapped.
Touya: So it would seem. *sits and closes his eyes*
Yusuke: So what are we gonna do about it?
Touya: *opens one eye and shoots an icy glare at Yusuke and Jin* Don't you think it would be wiser to find the source first?
Yusuke: *indignantly* Well, excuse me Mr. Bigshot, why don't you think of a way out.
Jin: Now, Urameshi...
*They look out the side of the cage. The girls have wisely backed off aways while Kaku leans against a tree, watching. Hiei is still on the ground, fighting the acid and Kuwabara is unconcious. Kozu is in a tree branch above, hanging upside down with her knees while investigating the top of cage.*
Yusuke: *irritatedly* Doesn't look like we're getting any outside help. Guess we'll just hafta bust out. *powers up his Spirit Gun again*
Voice: I wouldn't recommend that. *Yukina, Botan, Keiko, and the imprisoned boys turn to look. Kaku gazes at the new figure out of the corner of her eyes, and Kozu swings up onto the branch to watch*
Yusuke: Hello. *lowers his gun a little, studying the figure warily*
*The figure is wearing a maroon sleeveless shirt, a red sash, a pair of black leggings with straps under the feet, and is barefoot. She is about Yusuke's height with short black hair that barely reaches her neck and amber cat eyes*
Girl: *walks to the edge of the forcefield and says calmly* If you do shoot off your Spirit Gun, it will only reflect off the force field back at you and your friends. We wouldn't want you getting hurt would we?
Yusuke: Is that so. *raises his Spirit Gun again*
Touya: Fool. *grabs Yusuke's arm* It's too risky.
Yusuke: *insistantly* She's lying.
Kurama: *calmly* She's not. Look at her eyes, not a spark of fear. We truly are caught.
Girl: *laughs* An excellent deduction, Kurama. Now unless one of your friends, *indicates, Hiei, Kuwabara, Kaku, and the girls* can help you, I believe we'll be leaving now. *turns, and the cage rises into the air behind her*
Kozu: *standing in front of her, arms crossed* You're a bad person, aren't you?
Girl: *startled, then pretends to be hurt* Why would you say that?
Kozu: Cause good people don't take things that don't belong to them. And if you hurt someone, you hafta 'poligize.
Girl: *smiles* My, my, then I must be a bad person, don't you think? And I suppose if I am a... "bad person", disposing of you would be something I would do?
Kozu: *shrugs* You could try, sure. Let's play.
Girl: Very well. *points the fingers of her right hand at Kozu and shoots out more of the stringy substance* I don't know why I'm wasting my time on you, child. When you die, don't forget this is your own fault.
Kozu: *standing behind her, whistling* Y'know, dying sounds interesting, cause I'd be invisible and stuff, but not today, 'k?
Girl: *turns, surprised*
Kozu: *seeing her shock* Sorry, was that s'possed to hit me? I don't think it worked too well. So, you've had a try. My turn! *fires a small orb of spirit energy at the girl*
*The girl disappears, as does the cage, dropping the five boys to the ground. Rinku wakes up*
Kozu: *lowers her arms* Game over!
Kurama: Of course, she was an illusion!
Kozu: 'Course! Since she was, whoever controlled her couldn't make her react quickly enough. If they were here, they coulda seen I had dodged and shifted their attack. *points over the boys' shoulders* The lizard was a puppet. *glances at Rinku* Here, drink this. *tosses him a small bottle* It'll heal you.
Rinku: *drinks and makes a face*
Touya: *is investigating the body, then notices the arrow lodged in the tree and pulls it out* Our friend has left us a message. *removes the piece of paper from the arrow and hands it to Kurama* Read.
Kurama: *reads out loud* "Done the fight, but not the war. To the victor go the spoils. Shadows will rise up once more. Beware of friends no longer loyal"...
******************************************************************* Lizard: Yay, suspense! Now you will hafta wait till the next chapter comes!
Emma: -.-' Right...
Lizard: We're workin' on it tho'. Be proud of us cuz we have a bunch of homework, too! Please review, I'm sorry if anyones out of character, I have a hard time with some, Jin especially. His speech is so hard!
Emma: Next time is going to be interesting. You'll find out if Hiei can
survive Kaku's assault... She wouldn't dare kill him...
Lizard: *coughs* Actually, she prob'ly would.
Emma: NOOOOOO! *puts necklace like Inu Yasha'a around Kaku's neck* Stay!
*runs off, dragging Hiei behind*
Lizard: ... That was weird... But like she said, you'll discover the result of the battle as Hiei makes his last stand. Not that he's really standing anymore... *gets pummeled by Hiei fans* Its Emma's fault, not mine! Eventually, they're gonna get out of this dumb forest, I hope... Oh yeah, I'm s'possed to ask you to read and review Emma's poem and my other ones too. Lastly, Chu isn't here cuz he's busy bein' drunk somewheres an' Rinku couldn't get him to come. (In other words, Emma and I have no idea how to have him actually be himself...)
