Chapter 2:
To Tell The Truth
I never did tell Layla all of what happened with Adam. It wasn't that I didn't want to tell her; it just made me feel really self-conscious. Adam and I did email each other several times in the next few weeks. He was happily traveling all over the country and I had begun to work on a very exciting project. Everything was going great in my life. That is until I started to have trouble sleeping.
I had the exact opposite of insomnia I could not stay awake. This was affecting my work performance so much that my boss pulled me aside one day.
"Analei, I hate to say something to you, but your health is beginning to detract from our professional appearance. I didn't say anything earlier, but during the meeting last week you feel asleep twice. Don't get me wrong here. I am not chastising you in any way. For I am more concerned how you are doing health wise. I think it would be best if you saw a doctor." She did look worried for me. Here I thought I was getting in huge trouble and possibly pulled off the assignment and she was just looking out for me.
The next day Layla drove me to my family practitioner. I hate going to visit the doctor on my own so she offered to stay with me. The nurse came into my little room and said the doctor wanted some quick blood samples. I, having no fear of needles, held my arm out for her to draw the blood. After she had filled the second vile I felt very light-headed and nearly fainted. Layla propped me up against the fake pillow at the back of the examination table/bed.
Dr. Shelton entered the room a few minutes later. She held my medical chart in her hands. Quickly glancing over my medical history she sat on the stool and wheeled herself over to me. Then she began the grilling process of asking me a zillion questions concerning my entire life from the point where I started feeling sick until now.
"Well," I spoke in between yawns. "I was fine until about five or six weeks ago. Suddenly no matter how much sleep I got I was tired as soon as I got up for the day. The aching started a week after that, too. My back and my feet hurt the worst. I even bought one of those vibrating heating pads that fit chairs. I take that everywhere with me. It is seems to be the only thing that gives me the slightest bit of comfort. It has gotten so bad that I am not able to drive. I haven't come to you before this because I just thought I might need more sleep. Some nights I have been up pretty late. Okay I might as well admit this now, too, I don't eat well. That's it I think."
She jotted all of this down in my records then glanced up at me. She made some more notes before speaking. "I sent your blood to be processed quickly. I want to get to the bottom of your illness before I send you, because to me you look fine, just tired. But obviously there is something more going on here than meets the eye. I will be back in less than half an hour with your test results." And with that Dr. Shelton walked out of the examination room.
I looked at Layla with eyes mixed with fear and fatigue. I stretched out my arms for a hug. Layla quickly moved over to my side and gave me what I was asking for.
"Don't worry, Ana. I am sure there is a reasonable explanation for this. She will just prescribe you some silly pills just make you think that they are doing some good. You will be back to your perky self in no time." The smile Layla gave me did cheer up my spirits a little.
Dr. Shelton reentered the room ten minutes later. My medical file in her hands again. This time she did not sit on the stool. In stead she stood directly in front of me, her hands clasped at her waist.
When she spoke I could tell from her tone that is was not a simple illness that would just go away with a silly pill. "Analei you were not being completely honest with me."
'What was she talking about? She asked about my recent activities since feeling sick and I told her all that I knew. What more did she want?'
"Have you been romantic involved with anyone recently?"
"No not mono. I don't have the time to take off of work for that." My face feel with the thought of having to take sick leave for several months. I looked at Dr. Shelton for confirmation of my self-diagnosis. Her slight smile and tiny shake of her head told me I was incorrect. I glanced at Layla and we both shrugged our shoulders.
"The good news is you do not have mono. And this next bit of information you may take how you will. Analei you are two and half months pregnant."
I started to choke on air. That single simple sentence knocked the wind out of me. Between coughs I was able to squeak out, "Are you positive Dr. Shelton?"
Her eyes turned warmer and a motherly look crossed her professional face. "100% sure. You look very upset. You do know who the father is right?"
My face suddenly burned with anger. How dare she imply that I sleep around.
"Of course I know who the father is. That is not the reason I am upset. I am upset because I have virtually no contact with that father, that's all."
I could tell Layla was utterly confused by this point. I am the one to blame for that, though, maybe if I had told her she could have picked up on my being pregnant. Oh well, what's done is done.
We left the doctor's office shortly after the revelation that had begun to change my life. Layla was shuffling her feet behind me. I knew she wanted to ask me questions, but was too hurt to voice them. In the car, I will tell her everything.
I was awake for the first time in almost two months. All the aches and pains I had felt since then was concentrated in my temples. In the back of my mind I hoped Layla understood.
I turned in my seat to face her. "Layla, I should have…"
"Who, Ana, who is he?" her voice harsher than I wanted, probably harsher than she intended.
My confidence lost, I stammered, "Adam." Tears welled up behind my eyes. There was no way I could attempt to hold them back, so like a waterfall they cascaded down my cheeks.
"Adam? As in Adam Copeland? Ana you can tell me the truth. Is it Jeremy from work? I won't be angry if it is, even though I think he is a slime ball."
"Lay, you don't believe me? Don't you turn on me now, definitely not now. Why would I lie to you? Huh? I never told you the real reason I was at the hotel till morning. There was no party, not even a small one. It was just Adam and I in his hotel room. Neither of us had planned it to happen, but it did and now this is my consequence for not being smarter."
Layla's expression softened. She apologized and we drove to the nearest Giant Eagle. This emergency called for many half gallons of our favorite ice cream, mint chocolate chip.
We repaired our slightly damaged friendship by finishing one container of ice cream. Near the end of the second, with the spoon half way to my mouth, I asked her a question that had just entered my mind.
"Lay how do I tell Adam?"
"I don't now Hun," she whispered while hugging me tightly. "I don't know, but no matter what I am here for you. Always and forever."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I had come up with a way to let Adam know my condition. It just took me a few days to work up the courage. But what are a few days when he has not known for the past two and half months?
The only contact that I have with him is through his email. This is not information you send over the Internet. So I composed a letter and sent it electronically.
Dear Adam,
I hope this email finds you having fun somewhere in America. Pittsburgh is as cold as hell. If hell were cold that is. Anyway enough small talk about the weather, I have something that needs to be said and I do not think it is appropriate to include it in an email. So with that said, here is my cell number. Call me as soon as you read this. (412) 329-7782.
Sincerely,
Analei
The message happened to be a little more formal that I had intended, but I was in no mood to fool around with this subject matter. I just wanted him to call me and to tell him. Although, it took me several days to compose this email, I have no clue how long the two of us will be on the phone. Speaking the words and hearing his reaction might very well break the weak fibers holding me together right now.
Adam did not give me as much time as I would have liked to prepare for this conversation. He phoned me three days later.
"Hello," I say into the phone. There was no spunk to my voice today; it was a dreary day in Pittsburgh. It had been raining for the past few days and the weight of being almost three months pregnant was pulling my mood down.
"Analei, how's it going?" a rather chipper male voice boomed into my ear. I instantly knew it was Adam, even though I had not personally heard his voice since the morning we said good-bye. "This is Adam, by the way."
"Yes I figured a strange male calling my cell phone had to be you." I cringed at my own attempt at humor. "I am doing okay. Just going through the daily motions of living at the moment." Somehow that had come out a lot darker than I want it to.
"Something is eating at you. Does it have anything to do with what you could not tell me over the Net?" He had no idea what was in store for him next. In a few minutes this happy Adam Copeland would be no longer.
"Actually, Adam, it has everything to do with it." I sighed, took a deep breath and continued.
"I will not beat around the bush, there is no point. The reason it was urgent that you call me and not be told to you by email is the fact that I am pregnant Adam."
The whoosh of breath was obvious even over several hundred miles. I heard a low mummer as he tried to place thoughts into words. He was taking this as I had expected, maybe better than I had expected. But still not like I had hoped. I would have rather had him express his joy and say he would come running to my side, be with me through it all. That is what I wanted, but I could not ask him to give up his world because I had screwed up mine.
"Okay that is a shock. Are you sure you're pregnant? I am assuming that it's mine. Otherwise you would not have made me call you."
"Yes I am sure, Adam, and yes the baby is yours."
He paused for a moment. "How far along are you?"
"Almost three months," I answered dryly.
"I am going to have to sleep on this. A guy doesn't get a call like this very often. Hell I never thought I would get a call like this. I have your number now. So I will talk to you later." With that Adam hung up.
I placed my cell phone on the kitchen table and immediately crumpled into a crying heap. I should have known it would be like this.
Thoughts raced through my head. 'A guy doesn't get a call like this very often." What does he think, that I get told I am pregnant often? What did he want from me? More over, what did I want from him? I knew my answer to that one. It was probably the only sure thing in my life right now. I wanted him to know, as he had the right to, I wanted him to care, and I wanted him to be there.
Whipping the tears off my face, I stood up. There was no sense crying now. I had to face the facts. I was becoming an adult, whether I wanted to or not. With or without Adam I was in this for the long haul.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Several weeks past before I heard from Adam again. In that time I had begun to do things in preparation for my child. Layla agreed to see me through every step of my pregnancy. I guess you could call her a pseudo-father. I had prenatal check ups every three weeks and starting in my sixth month I would have Lamaze class every other Wednesday.
I was at a downtown baby shop when my cell phone rang.
"Hello," I called into the phone.
"Hi," a tentative male voice responded. It was Adam. Oh no, I am in public and this could get ugly. "Ana, I've done a lot of thinking. I want to let you know that I will be responsible for this child, after all I helped to create 'it.'"
The sound of him uttering those words brought a big smile to my face. "Thank you. Thank you for accepting this. I know it was a surprise to you, but it was for me also. Is there anything you would like to know?" I had moved to the back of the store for more privacy.
"Actually, yes. Since this is half my child, may we speak during some point each day? I mean fathering a child is new to me just the same as being an expectant mother is to you. I would like to be informed of my child's development." I could hear the smile in his voice. He sounded so young, much younger than he did during his promo speeches on SmackDown!
I gave a small giggle. Instantly I felt lighter, like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. He did care about this and that made me the happiest I had been in a long time.
"Of course we can talk each day. I am very glad you suggested the idea. It has been rather frustrating not being able to discuss what's happening in my life with someone other than Layla. Well I should get going I am downtown shopping for some baby things. I will keep you updated, though. Guess I will talk to you tomorrow?"
"Tomorrow then. Good-bye, to you both." We hung up. That phone call had turned out much more pleasantly than the previous one. I finished shopping that day with a good feeling in my heart and a very hungry feeling in my belly.
'I need to get used to eating for two.' I walked to the nearest deli and ordered the biggest turkey sub I could get, extra everything of course.
The next day at work I informed my boss of my condition. She was happy to hear that I was not sick, just expecting. Then she surprised me with adding that when I needed to I could take my maternity leave when I felt the time was right and stay home with my child for as long as I felt necessary, with modified pay after the child was born. And I was to come to her if I had any questions, anything at all. I knew she had five grown children of her own; so I think she was remember stuff she missed about her newborns. She gave me a warm, motherly hug and congratulated me. It felt good to get advice from someone I trusted and respected. While at the same time, it felt strange to be condoned for creating a child out of wedlock. What was I worrying about, that was almost more common these days than people having a child when they were married.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
The weeks and months that followed were difficult, but exciting. There was so much to do, shopping, decorating, eating. It was overwhelming at times.
My body had begun to change a lot, too. I was no longer the size two I had been since junior high. Shopping for maternity clothing was a bit depressing. I am guessing that is the reason for the ungodly gaudy floral prints. Lucky me, Layla is a fashion expert or I could have bought some really clownish outfits. She warned me that I already looked like a cow; I didn't need to look like cow with rainbow colors. The glare I gave her after she said that told her she better have been teasing.
I quickly learned baby furniture is very expensive. This is a mystery to me, as the baby will only use the stuff for a fraction of his or her life. At this rate my child would empty my bank account before the birth. And I can only imagine what that was going to run me. There was a crib to buy. A changing table that now can with millions of compartments. And a rocking chair, I was told no mother could be complete without a rocking chair.
Layla would not let me get too many things, however. That made me suspicious. She and the rest of our friends had to be planning something. Sure enough, at the end of my sixth month Layla and I came back from work one evening to about fifteen people in my apartment. I was surprised for two reasons. One was the fact that I had not known that many people could fit inside my humble dwelling, and two it still amazed me that people could be so supportive. That night was full of crazy antics. Baby shower game after game was played. Layla had done a good job of cataloging every item I oohed and awed over during our shopping excursions, because every gift I received was something that I had really wanted and needed. And the food, oh the food, there seemed to be an endless supply of it. Lately, food did not seem to last long in my presence though. There were even a few leftovers that everyone was kind enough to leave for me.
Doctor visits were getting fun as I progressed in weeks. Dr. Moore was able to use the ultrasound equipment to show me a live video of my growing baby. That was the most amazing image I had ever seen in my life. I was falling in love with this tiny life and he or she was not even here yet. I don't know how I will be able to handle the emotions at the time of the birth.
Adam and I called one another each night. He updated me on everything wrestling while listening attentively to every detail about the baby. I was beginning to believe that he was more excited about becoming a parent than I was, and he has yet to even see my large, round belly. He made a strange request one night. It was that I play his theme song, Never Gonna Stop by Rob Zombie. My first thought was why would I play my unborn child hard rock music, but he was insistent about this and it seemed pretty important that he be involved with the development of our child.
The next night as we were talking about the ultrasound and heartbeat, I felt a strong push in my belly. It made me yelp from the slight pain, well not a pain necessarily, but definitely unexpected.
"What? Why are you yelling?" Adam's voice rang with alarm.
"Wow, that was cool. I just felt the baby kick for the first time." I could not keep the awe out of my voice. My free hand fluttered to my belly. Upon resting there, my hand received a nudge as if my child was telling me "Hey this is my space. Keep out." I giggled at the thought.
"There it is again Adam. Oh I wish there was someone here to share this with." My giddiness was growing with every single word.
Adam spoke up, almost too quiet to hear. "I wish that someone could be me."
Emotional overload, that statement sent silent tears trailing down to my chin. 'If only you could see me now, Adam. Then you would know just how much I want that, too.'
Once again, Fate had thrown me for loop after loop. First I find out I am pregnant and the father needs to think about being a father. Then he has a complete change of heart. If this continued I would have gray hair by the time I reach the age of thirty. I prayed that the roller coaster I was on would soon come to a stop, leaving me where it had picked me up. Although, something deep down in my soul told me that pray would never truly be fulfilled.