Chapter II: An Important Talk With A...Boy?
Katie started running past the black blobs. She stopped and waited for Waffle to catch up. After a minute, she realized that Waffle had passed her a while ago. She turned to run after her, but was cut off by a black spirit-blob that bore a striking resemblance to Mario. She finally caught up to Waffle at the edge of the now-not-so-abandoned town, pausing at the darkness outside of the shops. She then remembered that neither of the two were scared of the dark and continued onward.
"So I guess we gotta save Mar and Sam, huh?" she asked Waffle as they jogged around in random patterns on the grassy hillside.
"Guess so. . ."
"'Kay, 'cause I was just thinkin' we could probably go home and nobody would really noti-"
"Hey, it's that girl again!" Waffle cut Katie off and pointed at a nearby bridge. Both girls stopped running around aimlessly, instead running with some slight purpose towards the bridge and the boy that had disturbingly girly eyes and hair. He muttered under his breath as they approached, pulling them down. He pointed to an approaching boat and whispered to them quickly.
"See that? That's the boat with the spirits. They're gonna get off and lay around for the long weekend, have some beer, pretzels, talk, and go home."
"Pretzels?" questioned Waffle. "But pretzels su-"
"PRETZELS ARE THE BEST DAMNED THINGS IN THE WORLD SO YOU JUST SHUT THE HELL UP!!!" the girly boy cut her off quickly.
Waffle was taken back. "Oh, no this ho-bitch didn't--" Waffle flung her arm into the boy's face before seeing it pass through him.
Katie looked over at the boat pulling onto shore. Hundreds of masks floating through the air glided past people in a straight line across the bridge over them, entering another area of the city.
"This place is called Abuyara. My name is Master Haku, and I've only come to help you."
Katie blinked slowly. "What does this have to do with Waffle's arm going through your pretty head?"
"You'll have to eat food from here if you want to survive." He pulled out two long Subway sandwiches, all dripping with cheese and sauce. "You have to eat this if you don't want to disappear."
"So...this place is where spirits come to be lazy bums and have massive orgies--"
Haku shook his head vigorously. "NOO. No orgies. Just to sit around, drink beer, eat pretzels-"
"What about our friends?" Waffle asked, biting into her last bit of sub. Haku blinked.
"I didn't even give you the--Oh, screw it. If you ever want to save your friends again--"
Suddenly, from above, a large, ugly-ass bird flew over the three of them, screeching in the night sky.
Katie stared at the bird for a second, swallowing her last bit of sandwich. A look of wonder filled her eyes, and slowly, she uttered one word.
". . . Daddy?"
Haku slapped his forehead. "That's not your dad! Jesus Christ!" He rubbed his temples and closed his eyes tightly, a migraine coming on. "Frustration. . . taking. . . over. . ." He inhaled deeply, then looked up again. "Despite the happy, joyous air of this place-"
"Did you see that fucking BIRD?!" asked Waffle. "That ain't no happy shyt."
Haku dug his fingers into his scalp, and let out a howl. Katie and Waffle pressed their backs nervously against the wall worrying of being caught. Haku took in a deep breath of air, and slowly exhaled. Katie finished up her sub with much satisfaction, and rubbed her stomach.
"That was the Yu-bird. Yu-baaba is the ruler of the bath house here." He twisted his head around. "Come with me across the bridge, and I'll see what I can do."
He got up and began to walk off before looking back to see the two looking down at their legs in dismay.
"What the hell happened to our legs?!" Katie demanded, seeing that she was stuck in her sitting position in the grass.
"Thanks a lot, JARED!" Waffle growled.
"Yeah. . . JARED!" Katie repeated, shaking an angry fist, despite not knowing just WHO Jared was. She attempted to stand again, also failing. . . again. She looked to Waffle to see if she had any more progress. Waffle was now lying on her side in the grass.
"IMMA GO KUNG-FU ON YO' ASS, PRETTY-BOY!" Waffle shouted at the mysterious young man. "EVEN IF YOU AREN'T DOING ANYTHING TO SUGGEST THAT YOU'RE THE ONE BEHIND OUR NOT BEING ABLE TO MOVE!"
Haku rolled his eyes and looked up at the bridge again. "Soon the pretzel-eating will commence. If you want to save your friends. . . you must go amongst the spirits as they eat them their pretzels."
"Your grammar disgusts me!" noted Katie. "However! You probably know how to get our legs moving again, so I'm going to pretend to not care so that you'll help us!" She paused, then forced, ". . . . Please."
Haku's face softened for a second, and he began to shake his head. He got onto his knees, and placed both of his hands on the girl's knees.
"In the name of earth, wind, and fire--...what is that in your shirts?"
Katie looked down at her saggy chest.
"Chicken meats. You got a problem with them?"
Haku raised a brow, and continued with his spell. "In the name of the band Earth, Wind and Fire-"
"Hey, that's not what you said at first...," objected Waffle.
"Unbind these girl's legs!"
He pulled them up.
"Run."
The three's leg pumped forward as fast as hell, making all of the lights and sounds of the city a blur. Katie began to choke on her own hair that entered her mouth as the group was led through alleys, streets, and a secret passageway until Haku broke down a door and led them to a small fence. Beyond the fence were hundreds of frogs and women, all walking along in line across the bridge that led into the bath-house.
"How did we run so fast?!" Waffle cried, feeling as if her knee cap was somehow moved from it's proper spot. Katie only breathed hard, angry at the girlish boy making them run so fast. He only held up a finger to his mouth, hushing the both of them.
Waffle felt like smacking the kid for shushing them, but stopped herself from doing so as he paused in his idiotically fast running to talk to both of them.
"You need jobs."
The two looked at one another, then back to Haku. "Why?"
"Because that's the only way you can stay here."
"Why?"
". . . Because that's what the rules here are."
"Why?"
". . . Because that's just the way it is now shut up!" He glared at the both of them as they snickered to one another. Haku appeared to be ready to burst a vein in his head, but other than that, appeared calm. He glanced at the two girls, shook his head, and continued. "You need jobs here. Just bug the hell out of the old six-armed guy until he gives you a job. His name's Kamaji."
". . . . Why?"
"Aspirin," Haku whispered to himself before rubbing his temples once more. He pulled the girls to the gate, and slowly opened it.
"I need you two to hold your breath while we cross the bridge. Otherwise, they'll see you."
He slowly led the two towards the bridge.
"Now..."
Waffle and Katie made the most disturbing faces before taking a deep breath of air, and holding it in. They slowly walked across the bridge in agony, and clung to the back of his...urm...shirt-thingy.
"MASTER HAKU!!!"
Haku looked down. A small, green aogaeru danced before him, grinning like he had no other important business to attend to. "Yu-Baaba wants to see you!"
Haku nodded. "About my mission..."
Katie gagged. This girlie-boy was having a conversation while they were suffocating! She socked him in the back, causing him to lurch forward. Waffle gasped suddenly, making herself visible to all of the passerby's. Katie also took in a breath of air, smiling.
"HUMANS!!!" A yuna screamed. Waffle blinked before seeing Haku's hand shoot some sort of spell at the frog. He grabbed them once more, and jumped forward.
The three fled quickly (as most fleeing is done) across the bridge, while several spirits put up a very pathetic protest to their actions. Haku skimmed along the ground, pulling the two only a couple of feet across the ground. Three yuna workers cried out when they flew under their dresses, creating an impressive Marylin Monroe effect.
"LEAVE. NOW!" Haku threw the two girls forward into a group of thorny bushes, ignoring their cries of pain.
"Go down the stairs, open the door, you know the rest..." Haku walked up a small flight of stairs into a small room where a bunch of spirits were yelling and arguing about what a big commotion Haku had started. Waffle and Katie rubbed their heads, wondering if they should thank or kill the small boy.
"I guess we should go meet this 'Kamaji' dude," Waffle said slowly. Katie nodded in agreement, wondering how long it would take to save their friends and leave the crazy place.