Author's Note: Here's a short little chapter to tide you over until I get the chance to do a real update. I promise we will get back to the action soon, but this is a chapter that I thought was important, and this was the most logical place to put it. So without further adieu, enjoy! (Remember, I own nothing!)
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While Warrick was driving to the airport to pick Nick up, Grissom and Catherine were waiting at the hospital. The doctor had told them that Sara was just being settled into her place in the ICU, but that he would come and get them as soon as it was time. They were both silent. What could they say? Grissom was still stewing over his outburst and Catherine was wondering if she should comment on it. In the end, she decided to let it rest because she knew full well that in Grissom's state of mind he would only get his back up. He was on the edge and his already frayed nerves were about to snap.
She glanced at the silver watch on her left wrist and swore under her breath. Was that the time? Grissom looked up at her. She smiled apologetically and began to gather her coat and purse.
"Gil, you know I wish I could stay here and see Sara, but its almost a quarter after eight. I need to pick Lindsay up from the neighbors and get her off to school. They won't let both of us in to see her at the same time anyways, so I will go and then come back, okay?"
He nodded and rose to give her a hug as she left. She rested in his arms for just a moment, savoring the fleeting sense of security that she felt. She pulled back and studied his face, her eyes roaming the lines of worry that were etched across the surface. She gave him what she hoped was a reassuring smile.
"I'll bring you some real coffee when I come back. Anything has to be better than this sludge."
He smiled at her. "Thank you Catherine. Now go. Lindsay needs you."
She gave his hand a final brief squeeze and left the waiting room. Grissom sat back in his chair and did his best to ignore the quiet conversations and the muffled sobs of people around him. There was not a happy face in the room. The people who sat there looked as if they had long ago forgotten how to smile. Through their midst, a doctor came striding through. Grissom recognized him as the doctor who had been talking to Warrick. He leapt to his feet.
"Doctor…I'm sorry I never got your name. Sara Sidle, how is she?"
The doctor extended his hand which Grissom grasped and shook. "Doctor Howe. And why don't we have a seat? I'll explain Sara's injuries to you and then I will take you in to see her." They sat across from one another on two worn chairs at the end of the waiting room. Grissom momentarily wondered what kind of news these chairs had heard. How many people had wept with joy at the good news about their loved ones health? How many tears had been shed when the doctor broke the worst possible news to them? The chairs good bring respite from the sorrow, or they could bring the burden of loss. Grissom sat in one while the chairs waiting to here the confessions.
"Mr. Grissom, is it?" Grissom nodded. "Ms. Sidle has you listed as her next of kin. I know that you are her boss, but I want you to realize that as her next of kin, you may be required to make decisions on her behalf. It is a great responsibility, so be prepared to make some potentially difficult choices in the next few days."
Grissom nodded. He already knew all this. He wanted to grab the doctor and tell him to get to the point but he knew that it was protocol. He bit his tongue and tried not to look to antsy.
The doctor continued. "Now as you know, Sara sustained massive internal damage. Her spleen was ruptured and had to be removed. The liver also sustained a great deal of trauma and a major concern right now is that the bleeding may start again. We are monitoring this. She suffered three broken ribs and the left lung was punctured. This led to even more internal bleeding. Now we've drained the lung and repaired it, but there is still much difficulty when she's breathing. She is breathing on her own, which is a very good sign, but we are concerned that the lung may re-open due to the pressure of the swelling on her ribs. If that happens, she will require immediate surgery to correct the problem."
Grissom felt like the world was spinning at top speed. He had a feeling of being slightly removed from the situation. It was as if he was listening to the doctor talk about someone else. It was like hearing about the misfortunes.
But he was talking about Sara.
Grissom tried to find his voice. "How is she right now?" He was almost afraid of the response.
"Mr. Grissom, I won't lie to you. Right now, Sara is in critical condition. Her internal organs have suffered immense damage. She is very fortunate not to have sustained any head injuries. But as it stands right now, she is in a coma. Her body is struggling to survive, and the fight is taking a lot out of her. We don't know how long she will remain like this. What we do know is that the next forty-eight hours are of paramount importance. If, during that time, her body can fight the damage, then the prognosis is very good. However, infection is always a concern with us. We are monitoring it very carefully and of course we will make any new information available to you. Do you have any questions?"
"Can I see her?"
The doctor smiled. "Of course. But only for about ten minutes. Follow me."
He led Grissom through a maze of beds to where Sara was. He pulled up a chair for Grissom to sit in, then politely excused himself. Grissom sat and studied Sara carefully. Her face was very pale, and her dark hair made a sharp contrast with the light skin. Her face was untouched by any injury. Grissom thought that you could never guess that she had been in an accident. There was no outward sign of what had happened. The events of the previous evening were contained inside her body. There was nothing that Grissom could do now except be with her. As he looked at her face, he began to speak softly to her.
"Hey Sara, its Grissom. You're really scaring us, you know that? We want you to fight this Sara. You are the most stubborn, determined, and tenacious person I know. If anyone can win this type of battle, it will be you. You have always been a fighter.
God, Sara I wish I told you more often how important you are. Since I met you, I knew that you were going to be great. And I never once regretted asking you to come work with us. The rest of the team feels that way too. They say that others act as a reflection of oneself. I never knew what that meant before, but I think I get it now: other people are a mirror for who you are and what you want to be. The things that you love or loathe about yourself are reflected in the people you choose to align yourself with. You are a reflection of me Sara, but only the very best parts. You are my mirror. That's why I want you to wake up Sara. Because the qualities you reflect are so wonderful, that I would lose part of myself if I lost you. I need my reflection Sara.
Look, my time is almost up, but I want you to know that the team is behind you, and we are all praying for you. We know you can do this Sara but we can't do it for you. Be strong Sara. I'll come back as soon as the doctors let me. God Bless."
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Grissom headed out into the warm morning sunshine. The storm from last night had given way to a beautiful day. He wandered around the grounds of the hospital until they would tell him that he could go back in. A million thoughts were racing through his mind. Mostly, they revolved around his anger at Greg. He hadn't been lying when he had said those things to the younger man. He did blame him for the accident. Yet Grissom heard the little nagging voice in the back of his mind that was asking the question that he wasn't sure he wanted the answer to. He looked up at the hospital where Sara lay and whispered:
"Why did you get in the car with him Sara, if you knew that he had been drinking?"