A/N this is my take on a story done many times, sort of. I hope u think its funny b/c parts of this will have happened in my school…………Also this is before Order of the Phoenix came out. Sorry to all of you if this story offends you because of the death that happened, this is still going to contain the dead character as if he was alive and well…..
Chapter 1 It begins
It was just another beginning of term staff meeting, in the Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry staff room. The professors were all sitting there waiting patiently. This meeting was supposedly had to be a day earlier than planned because of something the current headmaster had thought of. Albus Dumbledore walked into the staff room and began, "Well, I bet you are all wondering why you are all here earlier this year. Well I have come to my senses this summer and realized that our students know nothing about sex, and the physical part of what they are going through right now, and what their opposite sex is going through at this time. So, I have decided that we are going to teach them…"
Before he could continue one particular professor spoke up. "You have to be kidding? You want us to teach these kids about 'sex'? Isn't that what their parents are for? That is just wrong…." "Well, before I was interrupted I was going to tell you all who is going to be teaching the classes." All the professors were waiting anxiously, hoping it was not them.
"Fillius, you and Poppy will be teaching Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws. And Minerva, you and Severus will be teaching the Gryffindors and Slytherins." Snape's eyes grew in horror. Professor Sprout chuckled. "It wouldn't be funny if you had to teach Potter and gang, not to mention the rest of the Weasley clan about 'sex'. Would you like to teach it for me? I thought so. SO shut up!" He shouted, and he started to bang his head on the table muttering something like, "At least I can help the population by telling the Weasley's about protection,"
"The professors who are going to be teaching the new class, you have all your supplies, and text books required to teach the classes. You will be teaching the class after dinner every night. The schedule is inside of your teachers guide. I suggest that you go with your teaching partner to make up a lesson plan." Albus' eyes sparkled when he saw Snape stop banging his head on the table and ask, "Are you saying that we are going to be teaching the same class at the same time? Isn't there going to be a male and female class?"
"No Severus, it helps if the students are kept together." "Oh great! This is going to be more fun then I expected!" Snape said whilst getting up and Minerva following closely behind.
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"Hey Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Fred, and George! Your Hogwarts letters are here!" Molly Weasley called up the stairs. The six kids came running down the stairs and they each too their letters and opened them. "Hey, what are these books for? And why does each of us have to get them?" Ron said while pointing to particular book. They were, 'Life' 'All you need to know about the human body' 'All you ever wanted to know about sex'
"Well, maybe we should actually read the letters this year…" Harry said. They all read the letters and when they all looked up, they looked horrified. "Well, what is it?" Molly said, growing impatient. "We, we are having a new course this year mum…..Its called 'Sex-ed' And guess who we have?" Ginny said bravely. "Who?" "We have McGonagall and…and…and Snape" Hermione said. "Oh dear! This will be an interesting year!" Molly said chuckling.
Little did they know, interesting would be a little too sparse…
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The next day the group of students consisting of Ron, Harry, Hermione, Ginny, Fred, and George, were on their way through the barrier between platforms 9 and 10. Once they got through the barrier and said their good-byes to Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, they all got aboard the train and went their separate ways. Ginny to find Colin, Fred and George to find Lee, and the other three to the last compartment of the train.
"I wonder who the new DADA teacher is?" Hermione asked. "I don't know but I am really not looking forward to these extra classes right after dinner with McGonagall and Snape. Why did it have to be Snape of all people?" Ron said whining. "Well, even though the class is required, we only have to take it this year, so we should be grateful just for that." Hermione said.
"Well, I wonder when our first class is, and what we are going to be exactly learning." Harry said jokingly. "I don't know, but can we please talk about something else?" Ron said trying desperately to change the subject. "Sure, do you want to play exploding snap?" "Sure" "Ok" Hermione put down her book to play a game with the guys.
Before they knew it, they were back at Hogwarts.
The sorting went by before Ron could complain about being hungry. After everybody was full Dumbledore made his famous beginning of term speech. "Welcome all of you to a new school year. I would like remind all students that the forbidden forest, as it's name suggests, is forbidden. And that the staff here at Hogwarts would like to welcome our new Defense Against the Dark Arts teachers…" "Did he say teacherS?" Harry asked Ron and Hermione. "Yeah, I wonder what's up.?" Ron replied "Professors Lupin, and Black." (A/N in all my stories, I have them teaching DADA b/c I think they are the best characters!)
As soon as Harry heard the two names his eyes shot up to the two familiar faces, sitting directly on either side of Snape. (who did NOT seem at all pleased with the sitting arrangements) The trio looked at each other and smiled. The two professors waved to them, and they waved back. Dumbledore continued, "It's time for bed now. Prefects, please escort the first years to the dormitories." The trio walked up to the Head table to talk to their new DADA teachers.
"How come you didn't tell me about this?" Harry asked Sirius before they could say hello. "Because we wanted it to be a surprise!" "Well you got what you wanted, we're surprised!" Harry said excitedly hugging Sirius. "Good, now you guys have a busy schedule tomorrow, and tomorrow night," Sirius said while holding Harry out at arms length, and winked at him, "I hope you enjoy the extra classes with our dear friend Snivellus!" Remus said laughingly. "Oh, Im sure we will LOVE those classes, right after dinner and all." Ron said brandishing his schedule. Everyone laughed "Well we best be off to bed, we have class first thing in the morning. Great to see you two again." Hermione said whilst grabbing Harry and Ron's arms and dragging them off to Gryffindor tower.
Chapter 1 It begins
It was just another beginning of term staff meeting, in the Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry staff room. The professors were all sitting there waiting patiently. This meeting was supposedly had to be a day earlier than planned because of something the current headmaster had thought of. Albus Dumbledore walked into the staff room and began, "Well, I bet you are all wondering why you are all here earlier this year. Well I have come to my senses this summer and realized that our students know nothing about sex, and the physical part of what they are going through right now, and what their opposite sex is going through at this time. So, I have decided that we are going to teach them…"
Before he could continue one particular professor spoke up. "You have to be kidding? You want us to teach these kids about 'sex'? Isn't that what their parents are for? That is just wrong…." "Well, before I was interrupted I was going to tell you all who is going to be teaching the classes." All the professors were waiting anxiously, hoping it was not them.
"Fillius, you and Poppy will be teaching Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws. And Minerva, you and Severus will be teaching the Gryffindors and Slytherins." Snape's eyes grew in horror. Professor Sprout chuckled. "It wouldn't be funny if you had to teach Potter and gang, not to mention the rest of the Weasley clan about 'sex'. Would you like to teach it for me? I thought so. SO shut up!" He shouted, and he started to bang his head on the table muttering something like, "At least I can help the population by telling the Weasley's about protection,"
"The professors who are going to be teaching the new class, you have all your supplies, and text books required to teach the classes. You will be teaching the class after dinner every night. The schedule is inside of your teachers guide. I suggest that you go with your teaching partner to make up a lesson plan." Albus' eyes sparkled when he saw Snape stop banging his head on the table and ask, "Are you saying that we are going to be teaching the same class at the same time? Isn't there going to be a male and female class?"
"No Severus, it helps if the students are kept together." "Oh great! This is going to be more fun then I expected!" Snape said whilst getting up and Minerva following closely behind.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Hey Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Fred, and George! Your Hogwarts letters are here!" Molly Weasley called up the stairs. The six kids came running down the stairs and they each too their letters and opened them. "Hey, what are these books for? And why does each of us have to get them?" Ron said while pointing to particular book. They were, 'Life' 'All you need to know about the human body' 'All you ever wanted to know about sex'
"Well, maybe we should actually read the letters this year…" Harry said. They all read the letters and when they all looked up, they looked horrified. "Well, what is it?" Molly said, growing impatient. "We, we are having a new course this year mum…..Its called 'Sex-ed' And guess who we have?" Ginny said bravely. "Who?" "We have McGonagall and…and…and Snape" Hermione said. "Oh dear! This will be an interesting year!" Molly said chuckling.
Little did they know, interesting would be a little too sparse…
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The next day the group of students consisting of Ron, Harry, Hermione, Ginny, Fred, and George, were on their way through the barrier between platforms 9 and 10. Once they got through the barrier and said their good-byes to Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, they all got aboard the train and went their separate ways. Ginny to find Colin, Fred and George to find Lee, and the other three to the last compartment of the train.
"I wonder who the new DADA teacher is?" Hermione asked. "I don't know but I am really not looking forward to these extra classes right after dinner with McGonagall and Snape. Why did it have to be Snape of all people?" Ron said whining. "Well, even though the class is required, we only have to take it this year, so we should be grateful just for that." Hermione said.
"Well, I wonder when our first class is, and what we are going to be exactly learning." Harry said jokingly. "I don't know, but can we please talk about something else?" Ron said trying desperately to change the subject. "Sure, do you want to play exploding snap?" "Sure" "Ok" Hermione put down her book to play a game with the guys.
Before they knew it, they were back at Hogwarts.
The sorting went by before Ron could complain about being hungry. After everybody was full Dumbledore made his famous beginning of term speech. "Welcome all of you to a new school year. I would like remind all students that the forbidden forest, as it's name suggests, is forbidden. And that the staff here at Hogwarts would like to welcome our new Defense Against the Dark Arts teachers…" "Did he say teacherS?" Harry asked Ron and Hermione. "Yeah, I wonder what's up.?" Ron replied "Professors Lupin, and Black." (A/N in all my stories, I have them teaching DADA b/c I think they are the best characters!)
As soon as Harry heard the two names his eyes shot up to the two familiar faces, sitting directly on either side of Snape. (who did NOT seem at all pleased with the sitting arrangements) The trio looked at each other and smiled. The two professors waved to them, and they waved back. Dumbledore continued, "It's time for bed now. Prefects, please escort the first years to the dormitories." The trio walked up to the Head table to talk to their new DADA teachers.
"How come you didn't tell me about this?" Harry asked Sirius before they could say hello. "Because we wanted it to be a surprise!" "Well you got what you wanted, we're surprised!" Harry said excitedly hugging Sirius. "Good, now you guys have a busy schedule tomorrow, and tomorrow night," Sirius said while holding Harry out at arms length, and winked at him, "I hope you enjoy the extra classes with our dear friend Snivellus!" Remus said laughingly. "Oh, Im sure we will LOVE those classes, right after dinner and all." Ron said brandishing his schedule. Everyone laughed "Well we best be off to bed, we have class first thing in the morning. Great to see you two again." Hermione said whilst grabbing Harry and Ron's arms and dragging them off to Gryffindor tower.