"The second time is for what is. The way back comes but once. Be
steadfast."
What is? Alexabeth thought, How will this be a test? My life is as
uneventful as it's ever been... She stepped into the light. She became
the light. The light was everything.
Her head ached. She had been sitting here for hours. Paper after paper
had been picked up, read and discarded. She had enough paper cuts on her
fingers to prove it.
The way back comes but once. Be steadfast.
She looked up from the paper she'd been reading, but no one was there.
Great, she thought, I'm starting to hear voices.
Alexabeth picked up the next paper on the stack. She read through it
twice, thinking she must have read something wrong. "How did this get into
the pile of penances??" she asked herself hoarsely.
She stood up quickly, knocking her chair over backward. "Light!" she
hissed as she tumbled over it on her way out of the room. Her two Warders,
Drekar and Tibion, straightened hurriedly as she flew out the door and down
the hall. She turned back to give them a look that could only mean "What
are you waiting for?" They shrugged to each other and galloped after her
to keep up.
"Mother," she spoke softly, after being granted permission to enter. She
left her Warders outside, much to their disapproval.
She tripped over to the Amyrlin's desk with as much dignity as she could
muster under the circumstances. "What is this all about? Do you know?"
Alexabeth dropped the slip of paper before Kaydrienne Sedai and stepped
back to gauge her reaction.
Kaydrienne lifted the paper and read it quickly. Then, as Alexabeth
herself had done, she read through it a second time.
"Do you know where this came from, Daughter?" Kaydrienne quipped.
"That's what I was going to ask you," Alexabeth answered breathlessly.
Most of the writing was unimportant, but near the bottom Alexabeth read
aloud "I am of the Black Ajah. Not by choice, but by necessity. They will
strike soon, by any means possible. Watch your backs. Their goal is the
Amyrlin's life."
Suddenly, Alexabeth was on the floor with a pain in her temple. She raised
her finger to feel the tender skin. Blood. She looked ahead of her and
saw Kaydrienne sprawled on the floor several feet from where she had been
standing, beginning to stir as well. On the other side of the room, stood
Tibion. Drekar, she could see collapsed upon the floor outside the door.
Just before the door, she saw a large Silver Arch, which seemed to pulsate
with light.
The way back comes but once. Be steadfast.
She had a sudden urge to flee toward the Arch, but how could she leave her
friend, her superior virtually helpless at the hands of her Warder gone
evil. Then, a most sickening feeling was upon her. She was being
shielded! The look on Tibion's face could only mean one thing.
"You!" Alexabeth spat. How could they have missed the fact that one of her
Warder's could channel? How did this happen?
The look on his face became pained as he used to Power to trap her in a
blanket of air. The shocked jarred sense into her. Oh no! The Arch! How
will I make it back? .Wait. I'm not supposed to remember this! What's
going on?
As Tibion took measured steps toward Kaydrienne, Alexabeth tried to figure
out how she could get to the Arch. I'll be stuck her forever! I'll never
really become an Aes Sedai!
Alexabeth saw something move out of the corner of her eye, but she was held
in place enough to not be able to see clearly. By the time Tibion had
reached Kaydrienne, Alexabeth could tell she had been shielded and held in
place as well. She could also see more clearly what she had seen earlier
in her peripheral vision. Drekar.
Oh, Drekar, you have no idea how badly I need your help right now.
Alexabeth looked back toward the Arch and could see it dissolving around
the edges. She knew she had to get through soon. Can I really leave the
Amyrlin Seat like this, even if it's not real?
Her conscience was numbed by the sudden realization that Drekar had
silently drawn his sword, and now had it positioned above his head.
Alexabeth squeezed her eyes shut just in time. She heard a muffled noise,
but didn't have the time to let it register. She was no longer shielded!
She stood up and raced toward the Arch, without looking back. As she
stepped through, she turned to see that Drekar had failed. His body lay
lifeless on the floor and Tibion was now within range of Kaydrienne. Thank
you my friend. You tried. I could not have asked for more.
The light engulfed her. It pulsed through her veins. It made her cry out.
Then it was over.
"What a coward I am," she sighed as she dropped to her knees. "Forgive
me."
steadfast."
What is? Alexabeth thought, How will this be a test? My life is as
uneventful as it's ever been... She stepped into the light. She became
the light. The light was everything.
Her head ached. She had been sitting here for hours. Paper after paper
had been picked up, read and discarded. She had enough paper cuts on her
fingers to prove it.
The way back comes but once. Be steadfast.
She looked up from the paper she'd been reading, but no one was there.
Great, she thought, I'm starting to hear voices.
Alexabeth picked up the next paper on the stack. She read through it
twice, thinking she must have read something wrong. "How did this get into
the pile of penances??" she asked herself hoarsely.
She stood up quickly, knocking her chair over backward. "Light!" she
hissed as she tumbled over it on her way out of the room. Her two Warders,
Drekar and Tibion, straightened hurriedly as she flew out the door and down
the hall. She turned back to give them a look that could only mean "What
are you waiting for?" They shrugged to each other and galloped after her
to keep up.
"Mother," she spoke softly, after being granted permission to enter. She
left her Warders outside, much to their disapproval.
She tripped over to the Amyrlin's desk with as much dignity as she could
muster under the circumstances. "What is this all about? Do you know?"
Alexabeth dropped the slip of paper before Kaydrienne Sedai and stepped
back to gauge her reaction.
Kaydrienne lifted the paper and read it quickly. Then, as Alexabeth
herself had done, she read through it a second time.
"Do you know where this came from, Daughter?" Kaydrienne quipped.
"That's what I was going to ask you," Alexabeth answered breathlessly.
Most of the writing was unimportant, but near the bottom Alexabeth read
aloud "I am of the Black Ajah. Not by choice, but by necessity. They will
strike soon, by any means possible. Watch your backs. Their goal is the
Amyrlin's life."
Suddenly, Alexabeth was on the floor with a pain in her temple. She raised
her finger to feel the tender skin. Blood. She looked ahead of her and
saw Kaydrienne sprawled on the floor several feet from where she had been
standing, beginning to stir as well. On the other side of the room, stood
Tibion. Drekar, she could see collapsed upon the floor outside the door.
Just before the door, she saw a large Silver Arch, which seemed to pulsate
with light.
The way back comes but once. Be steadfast.
She had a sudden urge to flee toward the Arch, but how could she leave her
friend, her superior virtually helpless at the hands of her Warder gone
evil. Then, a most sickening feeling was upon her. She was being
shielded! The look on Tibion's face could only mean one thing.
"You!" Alexabeth spat. How could they have missed the fact that one of her
Warder's could channel? How did this happen?
The look on his face became pained as he used to Power to trap her in a
blanket of air. The shocked jarred sense into her. Oh no! The Arch! How
will I make it back? .Wait. I'm not supposed to remember this! What's
going on?
As Tibion took measured steps toward Kaydrienne, Alexabeth tried to figure
out how she could get to the Arch. I'll be stuck her forever! I'll never
really become an Aes Sedai!
Alexabeth saw something move out of the corner of her eye, but she was held
in place enough to not be able to see clearly. By the time Tibion had
reached Kaydrienne, Alexabeth could tell she had been shielded and held in
place as well. She could also see more clearly what she had seen earlier
in her peripheral vision. Drekar.
Oh, Drekar, you have no idea how badly I need your help right now.
Alexabeth looked back toward the Arch and could see it dissolving around
the edges. She knew she had to get through soon. Can I really leave the
Amyrlin Seat like this, even if it's not real?
Her conscience was numbed by the sudden realization that Drekar had
silently drawn his sword, and now had it positioned above his head.
Alexabeth squeezed her eyes shut just in time. She heard a muffled noise,
but didn't have the time to let it register. She was no longer shielded!
She stood up and raced toward the Arch, without looking back. As she
stepped through, she turned to see that Drekar had failed. His body lay
lifeless on the floor and Tibion was now within range of Kaydrienne. Thank
you my friend. You tried. I could not have asked for more.
The light engulfed her. It pulsed through her veins. It made her cry out.
Then it was over.
"What a coward I am," she sighed as she dropped to her knees. "Forgive
me."