TITLE: The Harsh Light Of Day
PAIRING: R/J
SUMMARY: Rory's 27th birthday is approaching, and Jess, who seven years before left her life, suddenly enters it again. But things are very different from the way they were before… (yea, I know this summary sucks, but I'm no good at these things)
SPOILERS: None that I know of
DISCLAIMERS: I don't own anything you recognise from the show. Basically just the characters I've made up, e.g. Pete, Mel, Cate etc.
RATING: R (PG, once again)
A/N: I can't help feeling that this story is getting worse with every chapter, but I hope that's not the case. Next week I'll try to update on Monday or Tuesday, then again maybe Thursday or Friday. It might be that I'll post the last chapters at the end of July, because the more I rush with this, the worse it's gonna be. We should have some R/J interaction soon. This chapter unfortunately doesn't have any, but be patient.
And as always, thanks for the feedback!
Chapter Eleven
*Luke's, Saturday 10pm*
Jess walked down the stairs and as he entered the diner people stopped talking and stared at him. Everyone was there, Miss Patty, Babette, Kirk, even Taylor. Actually it was a bit amusing to see their focused faces looking at him, and when he turned to look at Luke his uncle shook his head with a smile.
"You're probably hungry" he said as his nephew sat down.
"Yea, I am. I was actually thinking that I could help you out today"
"You don't have anything better to do?" Luke asked as he poured Jess a mug of coffee.
"You know, the book is finished, and I'm just writing an article… Nothing special"
Luke sat down and looked at Jess curiously. They hadn't had the chance to talk about his work before and he was interested, very interested.
"When is the book gonna be published? I mean, do you think I could have a sneak preview of it?" Luke smirked, but seeing Jess's serious face he looked at him observantly.
"It's…" Jess began to talk seriously, but then he started to smile. "It's a book about… this guy and he's sort of me and…"
"It's an autobiography?" Luke asked and seemed surprised. "Wow, is it about your travels, or.."
"It's about everything, it's… And then there's a girl…" Jess looked at his coffee mug when he spoke, and slowly Luke was getting it.
Luke glanced around, noticing that most people had already started talking again, but the biggest gossipers were still staring at him and his nephew.
"Why don't you eat properly now, and then I could leave this place to Ceasar for a while and we could go for a walk or something?"
Jess looked up at his uncle and smiled. It sounded like a good plan.
*London, 3pm*
Rory had gone shopping with one of her colleagues from BBC and when she dragged herself back to the hotel room, she was exhausted. The sun was shining, and it was warm, it was practically summer in London.
Rory thought about taking a nap, she had eaten too much for lunch and her feet were killing her. In the evening she'd go out to the theatre, and she was really looking forward to it. She lay down on the bed, but she couldn't even think about sleeping. She picked up the phone, and dialled, at the same time thinking that her next phone bill would be phenomenally big.
Mel was sitting in her office in New York, she often worked on Saturdays, when she answered her phone. She wasn't surprised to hear from Rory, she'd been expecting this call.
"So, you know"
Rory heard Mel's first words and she was perplexed. What on earth did Mel mean, because she couldn't mean the thing Rory had been thinking of.
"About what?"
"Jess and Cate, the book…"
"Well, how do you know? You talked to Cate?" Rory asked with amazement in her voice.
"Yea, Cate told me last Monday, but then Lane called me and told me that Pete had called her, and then I called Lorelai and she said that she'd called you so I was just…"
"Wait, wait, wait!" Rory sat up on her bed, not sure if she had heard Mel correctly. "What's going on here? You knew Cate and Jess had split up even before I left?"
Mel had a lot of explaining to do, how she'd pushed Cate to find out the truth, how Cate and Jess had broke up and Cate had told her everything. And how the book had been in the centre of it all.
"The book?" Rory asked, she wasn't sure if Mel was sane anymore because nothing she said seemed to make sense.
Just then Mel realised it, Rory didn't know about the book yet. Mel knew because Cate had told her, and also Pete knew because, according to Lane, Cate had given the book to him. But Lorelai probably didn't know about the book and Mel hadn't said anything about it, so… Rory only knew that Jess and Cate had split up, she didn't know that Jess still loved her.
"Okay, let's just take this easy. Have you… come to a decision?" Mel asked trying to make Rory forget the book.
"Yea" Rory said quietly, it felt strange admitting it, saying it aloud. "I made it in a second when my mom called yesterday. And then I tried to call Pete but he wouldn't pick up and… But didn't you say that Pete had called you or Lane or what.."
"Oh, well, that's not important now" Mel said hastily, wanting to hear what Rory had to say. "Tell me what you're going to do"
"I haven't really thought about anything but this… I know I can't be with Pete anymore, I guess I never should have been" Rory's voice was so quiet that Mel had a hard time hearing her.
Mel thought that she would faint. She thought that she should scream, or laugh or cry. Rory had made the right decision, the only decision Mel had seen possible. And she had made the decision even thought she wasn't sure of Jess and his feelings. In the end, Mel had tears in her eyes and she sniffled.
"You're not crying, are you?" Rory asked her friend and smiled slightly.
"No, just… I think you made the right choice, Rory. But what are you gonna do about Jess?"
"I'm gonna take things one at a time. First I need to talk with Pete. Then I'll think about Jess"
"You know, Pete will be prepared. Cate already talked with him"
For a while the girls talked about how Rory would handle the situation with Pete and then Mel asked when Rory would be getting back.
"I could have left last night, but I wanted to stay over the weekend. Being alone has been really good for me"
"Good to hear it" Mel said kindly, knowing that Rory had a tough and emotional time ahead of her.
When they ended the call Rory leaned back on the bed again and stared at the ceiling. When she had said to Mel that she would think about the situation with Jess after she'd cleared things out with Pete, she hadn't been completely honest. She thought about Jess all the time.
~Flashback~
He was standing by the counter, talking to Luke. He had such dark hair, it was almost black and a bit messy. He had his hands in the pockets of his jeans, they were a bit baggy but perfect for him. And he had a shirt that Rory had got for him when they'd been to New York together for the first time.
She was lost in observing him, watching him, his expressions and the way he moved. His body language was so familiar to her, but she could have spent hours just looking at him. It seemed so unreal, that she'd woken up next to him in the morning, he'd smiled at her and held her against him. It seemed so surreal that he loved her, he loved her and no one else. She knew things about him, she knew what kind of boxers he was wearing under his jeans. She knew more about him than anyone else in this place, maybe she knew more than anyone in the world. He was such a mystery to everyone, but not her. Well, of course, he had his secretive side, but still with her he was so different than with others.
He turned slowly, he turned to look at her. She knew that he knew what she'd been thinking of. It wasn't rare for him to catch her wondering about the sight in front of her. He smiled, not much, but enough to make her heart miss a beat.
~End of flashback~
Rory smiled to herself and rolled on her side. She'd have that nap, so she set her alarm clock to wake her two hours later. She closed her eyes and still, the smile was on her lips.
*New York, 6pm*
Mel knocked on the door of Rory and Pete's apartment, she knew she couldn't do much about the way things would develop from now on, but she wanted to help somehow. Pete came to the door, apparently straight from the shower. He asked Mel in and said he'd be back in a minute.
Mel went to the living room, looked around and then sat down. She was feeling a bit nervous, she really had no idea what state Pete was in. It was possible that he was completely crushed, but then again, it was just as possible that he was handling the situation well. Pete walked to the room in jeans and a t-shirt and sat down on the couch.
"Rory's coming home tomorrow night" Mel said, looking at him observantly.
"Yea, she sent me a text message. I haven't really talked to her after she left…"
"Are you okay?"
Pete looked at Mel and shrugged. He was tired, he hadn't slept well now that Rory was away. He never slept well when Rory was far from him. What was he gonna do now that she would never be near him again?
"I keep thinking back, thinking that I shouldn't have done this in the first place. I mean, getting together with Rory. She wasn't ready to let go of Jess, I saw it, but I didn't want to believe it"
"These things have a mind of their own. We can't control our feelings, none of us can. This is hard for everyone, but eventually it's gonna turn out for the best. You're still young, Pete, so many men have never even had a serious relationship at your age"
"That's not exactly a consolation" Pete said and looked kindly at Melanie. "You know, despite the fact that we're all supposed to be so career-orientated, independent and modern, I think that, above anything, we all want to be loved"
Mel listened to Pete's words and nodded seriously.
"Cause what would any career be, if you were alone. I mean if you have no one to love you, then what do you have?" Pete was talking more to himself than to Mel, but then he realised that he was talking of a subject very familiar to Melanie. "Mel, I'm sorry, I didn't…"
"It's okay, Pete. You're right, about everything. But the fact is that at some point we have to let go, but it doesn't mean that there's less love. My love for John hasn't gone anywhere, and his love for me is still with me. In the end, the memories are the only thing any of us will have"
"I've sometimes wondered how you do it. How you can live so fully, when you've gone through so much… Do you remember how Rory was for years after Jess had left and…"
"I've been like that, Pete. But I got through that time, just like Rory got through hers. And you'll get through yours. It's not easy, quite the contrary. But when you realise that you've made it through, you're ten times more stronger than you were before"
Pete looked at Mel and smiled a bit. He had been so alone in the past few weeks. Sure, he had friends, but it wasn't easy to talk about things like these with them. And he had been crushed when he'd realised that it was inevitable, that he would be left alone. And then, as if she had read his mind, Mel went to him and sat down next to him.
"You're not gonna be alone. Rory hasn't stopped loving you, your friends haven't left you. Life is gonna change, but you're gonna end up just fine, it may take time, but you'll pull it through. And you'll move on"
"It sounds like you've given this speech a few times" Pete said chuckled. "But It just happened so quickly. I mean, when I saw him in our doorway, when Cate said his name… I knew this was over. I mean, God, I'm not stupid. But still it happened so quickly"
*Stars Hollow, The Gilmore House 9pm*
Jess knocked on the door a few times, and when there was no reply he let himself in. He looked around, looking for Lorelai who immediately ran down from the stairs.
"Sorry it took me so long. I was cleaning up"
"You didn't use to be this interested in cleaning up" Jess replied and then smirked when Lorelai looked at him warningly. "Anyway, is this a bad time?"
"Nah, so what's up? I thought you were helping Luke tonight"
Jess and Lorelai went to the kitchen and Lorelai took out two beers from the fridge. Jess leaned against the wall, when Lorelai sat down on the side of the table.
"Luke said that he was just about ready. And I wanted to talk to you about something"
"About something?" Lorelai replied and smiled kindly at him. "About Rory?"
"Well, I.. Sort of, yea, I mean… Yea, about Rory" Jess stammered and then shook his head at his own behaviour. He was a grown man, how hard was it to talk about this? Actually, really hard.
"So, what about her?" Lorelai asked as Jess sipped his beer inattentively.
"I don't know really. I just… Well, I talked to Luke today, which was good cause I haven't really talked to anyone in a long time and…"
"What's a long time?" Lorelai asked him and she was actually a bit afraid of the answer he might give.
"I don't really… I don't like talking to people about myself anyway, so…"
"When have you last really talked to someone, Jess? When have you told someone about your feelings or thoughts or… something?"
Jess looked at the can in his hand, and thought about it.
"I talked with Cate when we decided to split up. Before that, I… Writing the book was like talking to someone"
Lorelai looked at him, just now she beginning to understand what he was all about. How was it possible that he was so detached from everything around him? It was almost as if he didn't belong anywhere and that was probably how he felt, too. But then again, Lorelai knew that he'd been able to talk to Rory, he had never been detached from Rory. Jess was one of those people who were just… Lorelai didn't even know the appropriate word.
"Well, I distracted you from what you were really here to talk about"
"Yea, I just wanted to know… I mean, I hoped that you could tell me about Rory" he seemed shy, almost as if he was ashamed to be so vulnerable.
"Yea, I can tell you about Rory" Lorelai said softly and looked at Jess warmly.
A/N: Keep the feedback coming, please!