Title: Hydrophobia
Genre: Humor
Rating: PG-13
Synopsis: AU Tasuki is the son of a water park owner and must prove to his father that he is not a whimp, or risk losing his inheritance.
Author: chibighost
Disclaimer: As much as I wish that the Fushigi characters are mine, sadly enough, they belong to Yu Watase.
chibighost: Gomen for taking so long, but oi was I surprised. I honestly didn't expect to get any reviews, but arigato to everyone who was kind enough to do so, it's always motivating to receive praise. ^___^
Tasuki: Like you deserve it. Hmph.
chibighost: More than you do. You're the one making yourself look like a fool, Tasuki-kun.
Tasuki: You're the one writing it, bakaghost.
chibighost: ^^;;; My, that was a weak insult. You must be getting rusty.
Tasuki: Me? Rusty? Damn it to hell! Damn you to hell! Damn everyone to hell!
chibighost: ... Oh Tasuki ... I think someone doesn't deserve his sake and tessan tonight...
Tasuki: O.O not my tessan and my sake!
chibighost: ^___^ is Tasuki-kun a good little boy?
Tasuki: Hai, hai! Very good, very obedient... (my poor tessan and sake, stuck with that, that, damn author!) ... exceedingly good...
chibighost: ^.^ excellent, I thought so. -locks tessan and sake in a safe-
Tasuki: T.T My tessan and sake! How could you?! How dare you?!
chibighost: Well, now that Tasuki's in his state of denial, enjoy this chapter, okay?
Tasuki: MY TESSAN AND SAKE! T.T
HYDROPHOBIA
~a fic brought to you by chibighost~
Chapter Two: A Push in the Right Direction
Houyoku Tasuki, son of the Houyoku Ryou, the owner of the world's largest water parks, was not enjoying himself at the moment. No, wait, that wasn't true. He was absolutely, positively, utterly, completely, totally, exceedingly, not enjoying himself--but of course, he couldn't admit that to anyone.
His slight discomfort might have been caused by the fact that he was currently standing on a high diving board located twenty-five feet in the air, at a local high school whose, Chichiri assured him, pool was completely desolate on the weekends. (Tasuki couldn't bear the thought of his six sisters watching him at home as he made a fool of himself in the water, again) Apparently, Chichiri's information had not been entirely correct: the high school's girls swimming team practiced in the pool on weekends, and since Chichiri had already paid to rent one end of the swimming pool, Tasuki knew that he was doomed to scream like a girl in front of girls.
He desperately hoped that none of the girls on the other side of the pool recognized him. Then again, with six very social sisters and flaming red hair to match, Tasuki was looking for a miracle.
But he'd never asked to be in this situation.
This thought caused the red head to remember that his current unhappiness was the sole and utter responsibility of three very, after he was finished with them, very unfortunate people: Nuriko, Chichiri, his father, well, he couldn't do anything to his father and Chichiri, well Chichiri was Chichiri, so, mainly, Nuriko. A blissful smile managed to creep onto his face, exposing his [adorable] miniature fangs, as Tasuki imagined that he was holding Nuriko's neck and happily made wringing motions with his hands.
Extrordinarily violent wringing motions.
It felt wonderful to finally use his pent anger and frustration on the indigo haired Nuriko, whom Tasuki swore was gay to the core and should have been born a woman instead. Of course, Nuriko had been teasing and chasing Tasuki since they were in kindergarten, and although he would never admit it, the red head had felt rather lonely when the cross-dresser began chasing someone else instead of him.
Speaking of the said cross-dresser...
Standing behind Tasuki on the diving board, (it's one of those plank thingies that don't go up and down) first waving his hand in front of the dazed red head's face and then snapping his fingers impatiently, Nuriko pursed his lips into a thin line. "Oi! Earth to Tasuki-kun! Are you going to stand there all day, or am I going to have to push you in like that one time we went water--"
The three seemingly innocent words of "push", "in", and "water" instantly broke Tasuki from his daydreaming. He tried not to look too disappointed to see that Nuriko's head was still where it was supposed to be and instead decided to bite one of the fingers being displayed in front of his face by his purpled haired torturer--or "friend", as Chichiri would say.
Unfortunately, Nuriko noticed and withdrew his hand.
The red head found that biting too hard can result in sore gums and teeth.
"Kuso! Why did you move your hand?"
Nuriko raised one elegant indigo eyebrow, regarded his "victim" for moment, before a seductive grin touched his lips and he leaned in toward the red head. "Ah, did Tasuki-kun intended to bite my finger?"
"To hell I did!" The red head declared with as much bravery as he could muster in such a situation.
"Oh?" Nuriko's eyebrows twitched suggestively. "I assure you, Tasuki-kun," he whispered huskily, "your mouth's administerings will be much more appreciated elsewhere." The cross-dresser was now so close that his breath gently stirred Tasuki's flaming crimson bangs. The poor helpless red head took one step back, but Nuriko only moved forward, causing the other to tentatively extend another foot experimentally--
--to find that there was nothing but nitrogen, oxygen, and hydrogen behind him.
Tasuki gulped.
The seductiveness in Nuriko's grin increased several notches.
With a desperate gleam, Tasuki's eyes darted frantically from the water twenty-five feet below, to Nuriko, and back again: a deer caught in the headlights of an eager Nuriko. It was either certain death by drowning...or give in to Nuriko after years of escape. Was he finally going to lose their eternal battle, and why did it have to happen near water of all things?
He had no choice...when pushed to certain limits, there was only one thing Houyoku Tasuki could do, and he was prepared to do it: he would have to allow Nuriko to do what he wanted, run, then hide from the rest of society for the remainder of his life. It can't be that bad, the red head reasoned to himself. He would be strong, he'd face it like the man that he was, he wasn't a wimp--
Tasuki groaned. What the hell was he thinking?
"Ohayoo, no da! Nuriko-chan, Tasuki-kun, I'm here, no da!"
--gravity defying blue hair appeared at the other end of the diving board, followed by Chichiri himself, a happy smile plastered on his face. For the briefest of moments, their cheerful friend simply stared in surprise at what Tasuki knew had to be an...uncompromising position. However, after knowing Nuriko for years, Chichiri instantly grasped the situation and frowned, scolding. "Nuriko-chan! I told you to behave and be nice to Tasuki, no da!" He admonished, climbing up the last few steps of the ladder and heaving himself onto the diving board.
Nuriko grinned broadly at the owner of the bobbing strands of rebellious blue hair, innocently patting a fuming (and blushing) Tasuki on the head. "Mou, Chichiri! Where were you? You weren't here, so I decided to start the plan without you."
Tasuki snorted. We? Plan?
No way.
Azure eyebrows rose. "Really, Nuriko-chan, na no da? And what plan was that, no da?"
"Ne? Don't you remember, Chichiri? We agreed that I'd back Tasuki near the edge, and then, we he was close enough, I'd--"
"You'd what, Nuriko?"
No "no da" at the end of the sentence? The red head smiled, relieved that the injustice of...something inappropriate nearly happening was being repaid. Chichiri sounded serious, and although it wasn't apparent, Chichiri was the leader of their group of three, and Nuriko, oh Nuriko would pay. Unable to resist, a happy grin twitched at Tasuki's lips.
"I'd help him get into the water," finished the indigo head cross-dresser good-naturedly.
"Oh, na no da. Hm, I guess that would work, Nuriko-chan, no da! Good idea, no da! There's no way he'd go into the water by himself, no da."
The smile was wiped from Tasuki's face. Yikes.
"But," Chichiri frowned, "how would you push him in without hurting him, no da?"
Tasuki wanted to run.
Nuriko beamed. "Simple, Chichiri! I'd just push him in...like this!" The purple haired cross-dresser cheerfully demonstrated this on his test subject--
Eep.
--Tasuki screamed.
A delicate hand flitted to Nuriko's mouth. "Oops! Gomen Chichiri! That was accidental, really! I don't know what happened! My hand, it just, it has a mind of its own!"
Chichiri peered down over the board. "Ne, don't worry, Nuriko-chan, no da. Tasuki's tougher than he looks, na no da."
Nuriko nodded. "I sure hope so, Chichiri." There was silence for a few moments. "Say, Chichiri, if Tasuki does survive this, do you think we should hire a lawyer?"
The gravity defying azure bangs bobbed. "Iie, Nuriko-chan, no da. I think Tasuki-kun is too loyal of a friend to do such a thing, no da."
Another moment of silence.
But, just in case he doesn't thank us later in life, let's go hire Tokyo's best lawyer, okay, Nuriko-chan, no da?"
"Okay Chichiri, but let's split the bills."
The two friends shook on it.
~until next time~
Tasuki: That was...so...EVIL!
Nuriko: Thank you. -beam-
Tasuki: That wasn't a compliment, you gay freak!
Nuriko: -grin- I know. But, say, why don't you and I finish that little scene above, hm?
Tasuki: O.O No way! Get--get away from me! Don't touch me!
Nuriko: -sigh- You're no fun, Tasuki. Ah well...oh Hotohori-sama...!
