Disclaimer & other ramblings: see some previous chapter (I really don't know which one any more)
Dedicated to all my wonderful reviewers, and especially to leggylover03 and Lita of Jupiter
A/N: This chapter is again divided into two parts; that's simply because one part would be way too long and it could be chopped into half at an appropriate moment, so… Hey, otherwise you would have had to wait till Sunday for the whole post! Anyway, the first part is a bit lighter and has a slightly humorous edge; the second part will be darker and will deal with the effect of Estel's late experiences. Oh, and before I forget, as mentioned above I will post the second part on Sunday (it's almost done, just a last rain check and some lay out work). Oh, and sorry for any spelling and/or grammar mistakes, I usually check the whole chapter word by word before I post it, but this time I decided to post earlier and leave possible mistakes.
Last moment additional R2R:
Lita of Jupiter - *blushes until she has more resemblances to a tomato than a human being* You are much too kind! Even having complete understanding if I don't update in ages! Still, the most miraculous thing is that I completed this chapter only yesterday; how did you know that?! *g* And because of you, I'm posting it today, otherwise I would've waited till tomorrow… so, you most certainly do your part as a nagging fan! (And I indeed am a great fan of Nili's writing and it's one of the few stories I actually follow regularly; the others being Cassia's Mellon Chronicles). This all leaves with just one question, what language is 'onegai' I don't know that one, and being linguistically interested, I'd really like to now… Once again, thank you for both your (first and) second review and your mail!
R2R's:
leggylover03 – I am truly sorry it took me so long and I know that nothing that I say can make it better. However, as said in the author's notes I can promise you that the next part will be up within three days as it is practically written.
Belothien - *blushes* Dank je wel! Het geeft echt een heel fijn gevoel als iemand die jou eigenlijk helemaal niet kent (niet persoonlijk ten minste) zegt dat je mooi kunt schrijven; ik krijg helemaal een warm gevoel van binnen!!! En nee, ik heb jouw actie-scenes inderdaad al een hele poos niet gelezen… hoe staat het met Mr Strider Returns? (alhoewel ik absoluut geen recht van spreken heb wat betreft updaten…) Anyway, once again: my utmost gratitude for your kind words.
Cathy – Glad you liked the chapter! And I liked Glorfindel in this role too, it was really fun to write! Thank you for the review and I hope you won't be too disappointed with this chapter (the first part at least… *eg*).
Alexa – Who was the voice asking who Estel was, you ask. It will be explained in the second part of chapter ten. However, if it's still a bit vague feel free to mail me or just leave a review and I'll answer your question as best as I can. Thank you for your review!!!
SperryDee – One of my favourite reviewers! *huggles SperryDee* Thank you for always leaving a note!
Lita of Jupiter - *blushes* I'm just glad you found it and that you like it so much! Well, here it is: more Estel interacting with his family!
trustingfriendship – Because of your suggestion I put in a whole paragraph on the impact of Estel's choice… unfortunately you'll have to wait for the second part of chapter ten to read it. Anyway, hereby I wanted to thank you for your idea! And of course for your review! *g*
Elladan – The dream scene was indeed fun to write, it was really natural and felt good; glad you like it. Glorfy!!! I just love that abbreviation! Anyhow, that's totally beside the point; thank you for your review and I hope you'll like this chapter too!
Faila Gamgee of Sandy Downs – Oh… *hits herself against the head* Of course she was screaming at the orcs, you oaf! Sorry, sometimes I'm just a bit slow on the uptake… Anyway, hope you'll like this chapter too!
Emmithar – I think I already responded to your review… quite a long time ago too… anyway, not long ago I sent you an e-mail but I'm not entirely sure it arrived (I sent it 15 September). Ah well, as you could read in the author's notes it's practically done; yay! (I have this teacher that uses 'yay' constantly… in normal speech… really weird!) I see that I'm already rambling, so I'd better stop now and send you another mail later, I mean, I won't use this precious FF.net space just for my ramblings… Love, Elnanor (darn, I can't even type my name correctly!) I mean, Elanor
the-ringspell – Well, here you are! A bit late perhaps, but well, 'better late than never'
Mysterious Jedi – I'm glad you like the story and thank you for leaving a review!
Silverfox The Fox – Thank you for your kind words; hope you're not too disappointed with this chapter!
Orphelia-Rose - *blushes* Thank you! And as you will read in this chapter he's pretty okay now. Once again I thank you for your kind words and my utmost apologies for taking so long to update.
Melissa – Thank you, it's one of my favourites too. And I'm glad you took the effort to tell me so; it's great knowing people actually like the 'special meaning' sentences/parts I write *huggles Melissa*
Puck – Note that the name of Healer is the Elvish Barrowdowns translation (i.e. not 'real', literal translation) for something one uses to add some flavour to ones food *g* Talk to you in a minute! *g*
Without further ado I giveth thee: (I really love this sentence :-)
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ indicates it is the beginning (or ending) of a dream/memory
//parts written in italics// indicates a flashback
Chapter ten part one
The wind was blowing in his face and he deeply inhaled the fresh breeze that brushed his cheek. The evening air was a bit chilly but that only prickled his senses in a pleasant way, cutting through his stuffiness like a liberating knife that cuts the bonds of a captive.
'Freedom at last,' he murmured softly into the cool evening.
The sun had not set yet and the last rays of the setting sun were painting all of Rivendell and its surroundings in a golden tint. The whole sight warmed his heart and he could not think of any place he would rather be than right here, on this very balcony in Rivendell, home.
A few moments later Estel stepped back from the edge and straightened his dark brown blanket that threatened to fall of his shoulders. A smile crept over his face as he thought of what Angafanaion would say if the Elf would see him now. Angafanaion was the Healer Elrond had appointed to take care of Estel after the worst part of his illness had passed. After all, the Elf Lord had to run Rivendell and though Glorfindel had substituted for him, it was not the golden-haired Elf's task and he had his own affairs to attend to. Thus, when Estel was merely recuperating from his illness the regular Healer of Rivendell had been asked to look after the young Adan, which turned out to make the Twelve Labours of Hercules* pale in comparison. For as soon as Estel could move around without experiencing terrible pain in his leg, he considered himself healed and spend no time to tell Angafanaion he was ready to be released from his care. The first time Estel had broached the topic Angafanaion had patiently explained to the boy he was not yet healed. Estel smile transformed into a full grin as he thought back to that particular moment.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
'Estel,' Angafanaion said in a very patient voice, tugging the blankets tighter around the boy who had thrown them on the floor in his attempt to get up. 'You are not yet fully healed; though you are healing nicely it remains a fact that for the next few days you will be more sensitive to all kinds of diseases and your thigh will be stiff and more fragile. You should not put too great a strain on yourself.'
'But my leg doesn't hurt at all!' Estel exclaimed which of course was a lie, for though he could stand on it without crying out in pain at the moment of the conversation, his leg still caused him a lot of trouble.
'Besides,' the boy continued, pushing away the blankets Angafanaion had placed on him so carefully. 'The influenza has completely passed, my head doesn't hurt, my nose is not clotted and I'm not coughing any more!'
'Then what was it what I heard yesterday evening?' Angafanaion asked meaningfully, once again attempting to secure the boy under the blankets.
'That was yesterday evening! I'm better now,' Estel said, struggling against the restricting blankets. However, as he was fighting against Angafanaion his breath became laboured and soon he felt the beginning of a coughing fit approaching. 'Valar, not now!'
He tried to hold his breath but soon the lack of oxygen started to make him dizzy and his lungs felt like they were on fire, and he could no longer resist and gave in to the tickling sensation in his throat. The sudden coughing surprised Angafanaion and he immediately grabbed a vial that stood on a small cupboard near the bed.
'Easy Estel, this will help,' he said not paying any attention to the resisting Human. 'I know it doesn't taste very pleasantly, but it will stop the coughing.'
'No,' Estel managed to croak between two fits. 'You're going to drug me into sleep again.'
'Estel, how come you think of that? You know I'd never do such a thing!' Angafanaion replied indignantly. 'Yes, I admit there is a calming ingredient in it, but it's the medicine Lord Elrond prescribed. I am simply following his instructions and if you have a problem with that you should take it up with him.'
Of course, Estel had no reply to this, and he half-heartedly drank the bitter concoction. It was even worse than he had expected and Estel pulled an ugly face. 'This cannot be healthy, for judging from its taste it must be poison!' he complained.
Angafanaion sighed, 'It's not poison, whining one.'
'I'm not whining.'
'Yes, you are.'
'Am not.'
'Are too.'
'Am not!'
'Are too!'
'Am not.'
'Yes, you are!' Angafanaion shouted.
'Ahem,' a voice interrupted. 'What exactly is going on in here?'
Angafanaion turned around, his face turning bright red. 'I'm sorry, my Lord,' he stuttered. 'I was just… having a… conversation with your son and we don't see eye to eye on a certain point.'
'He's trying to poison me, ada!' Estel yelled. 'Tell him I don't need that awful medicine any more!'
Elrond sighed and walked over to the bed where the agitated Adan lay.
'Please, excuse us for a moment, Angafanaion,' Elrond said, his expression serious.
'Yes, my Lord,' Angafanaion answered and with a bow he left the room hastily, eager for the opportunity to escape.
A most uncomfortable silence descended on the room as the Lord of Rivendell scrutinised his son.
'Ada,' the young Human began.
By raising his hand, Elrond quickly silenced the boy. 'I know you are bored and you want to get out of this room but you must understand you are not well yet.'
'But I'm not in mortal danger any more, am I?'
'No, you are not, but you are far from complete recovery too. Your body needs time to heal, surely you can understand that.'
'I do,' came the drowsy answer, Estel excitement dying away as the calming ingredient of the potion started to take effect. 'But I've been here for ages, El'dan and El'hir never have to stay in bed for so long.'
'Your brothers are fully grown Elves, you cannot compare them to you.'
'But neither do the other Elflings need to stay so long.'
Elrond smiled a sad smile. 'Ion nín, in spite of the fact that you are far more resilient than most Humans you are not invincible. You also know you are no Elf, you are an Adan; for you different rules apply.'
'Stupid rules,' Estel muttered softly, almost asleep. 'Weak rules.'
'No,' contradicted Elrond. 'As I said, different rules, which are not necessarily worse. Both Elves and Humans have weak points…'
At that point Estel had fallen victim to sleep and could hear the words of his father no longer.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Since that day he had had many arguments with Angafanaion about his health but every time the Elf had won with the argument that he was merely acting on his father's instructions. Therefore Estel had decided to take matters into his own hands; he longed for the touch of his bow in his hands and a fresh breeze while his feet dangled over Rivendell's lake. For the past week he had secretly practised walking a few steps in his room when no one was watching, which turned out to be not as easy a task as he had anticipated. He had been caught just once and had talked his way out of trouble by pretending he had been very, very thirsty and just couldn't wait to get something to drink. Angafanaion had looked sceptically but had merely replied that the Adan should have called for someone if he needed anything. Yet the Healer, who took his job a tad too seriously in Estel's opinion, had since the incident paid even closer attention to the boy than before.
Many Elves visited the boy, all knowing how much he enjoyed being free and in the open air. Though, the most enjoyable times were when the twins paid him a visit which they did as often as they could. They were pretty original in coming up with all possible ways to relieve their youngest brother from boredom. However, another band of orcs had been spotted near the valley yesterday and this time Rivendell reacted immediately by sending their warriors to dispose of the dark creatures. No matter that it was a necessary action, fact still remained that it resulted that Estel's brothers would not be home before tomorrow morning and that most of the other Elves would be occupied too.
Based on this information Estel had deemed the time to taste fresh air had finally come and though his father had told him specifically this very morning he was not yet fit enough to walk around, Estel had decided otherwise.
Having figured out that Angafanaion, still not really trusting the Adan who in his opinion had been much too quiet and compliant for his liking, checked on him every hour and Estel had known he had little time for his short venture outside his room.
Thus, not more than fifteen minutes ago, the young Human had slipped out of his bed, testing his balance first. Estel was pleased that the room had stopped spinning in a few seconds and he had ventured a step forward, one hand still leaning on his bed. As he let go of his support, he was delighted by the fact that he felt completely fine. Grabbing a blanket he walked over to the door and looked down the hall for Angafanaion or any other Elf that would try to stop him to his 'path to freedom'. Finding no one he sneaked out of his door into the hall and tiptoed to the nearest balcony. Standing there, he breathed in the fresh air.
'Freedom at last.'
As he watched the dark go suddenly quickly dark from his cosy corner, he thought about what had happened to him recently.
He thought back to when he and Razhluk had their stare-down, right after he had been caught. He was still amazed that the orc had not decided to kill him. 'Why? Elladan always told me orcs were ruthless killers but these did not kill me.'
He smiled a little as in his memory he saw Razhluk avert his eyes again and a triumphant feeling filled his chest. However, moments later he shivered mentally as he remembered the moment when Razhluk had named him the 'Dark Lord's Gift'. The cold look Razhluk had given him was one he would never forget: anger and hatred in immeasurable quantities, yet there was another emotion lingering in the ugly orbs. Looking back at it in retrospect Estel recognized it as fear. 'Fear? Why would Razhluk be afraid of me? And why did he want to bring me to…' Estel suppressed a shiver. 'To Mordor? It just doesn't make sense.'
As he was thinking about these past events, slowly he started to fall asleep; and the ingredients of thoughts and dreams mingled with each other resulting in a frightening nightmare of frighteningly realistic quality.
//The band came to a stop in front of an open circle where the orcs set up their camp for the day. Estel was thrown roughly on the ground, at the feet of Razhluk. A fire crackled near him. Estel tried to stand up as to show the orc he wasn't defeated yet, but was shoved back to the ground before he could find his balance.
Once again Estel tried to stand up, and once again he was pushed into the dirt.
He tried to rise for a third time but the orcs, becoming irritated by this defiant boy, hit him hard and the blow to his head caused Estel to remain on the forest floor to pull himself together. An orc kicked him in his stomach and he curled up in pain. The orcs cheered.
Razhluk observed the boy's futile attempts impassively. As Estel tried to control his ragged breath, the orc asked him: 'Are you afraid, Adan?'
Estel looked up and could not stop trembling, sobbing he whispered, 'Yes.'
The malicious glitter in Razhluk's eyes was all the warning he got. Before Estel could even realise what was happening one of the orcs hauled him up and shoved him to a waiting orc that punched a fist in Estel's face. The boy was still dizzy and trying to retrieve his balance when another fist hit his jaw and a fourth orc shoved him on the ground again. They waited for a few moments to give him time to regain some of his strength and then they began their sadistic play again.
Still, no matter how much they physically hurt him, it was nothing compared to the shame he felt for admitting he was scared and weak. Estel's vision blurred and his ears were burning, the world seemed to spin around frantically and all he could hear was the echoing cruel laughter of the orcs. Though he could no longer grasp what was happening to him, there was one thing that kept swirling in his mind: 'You are a weak and pathetic Adan! Why don't you fight back, weakling? Because you are weak, coward!'
Estel wished for oblivion to claim him, but the orcs were skilled in their torture and made sure the small human did not pass out.//
With a soft cry he awoke, crawling against the posts of the balcony and hiding in his blanket. It took him a while to realise he was home again, not in the hands of the orcs; but he still shuddered as a he felt the icy tendrils of fear make their way down his spine as he realised he was still much influenced by the events. 'I am weak,' he thought. 'Why can't I be stronger? Why am I not more like Elladan?'
He did not want to return to the confinements of his room yet, and though no room in Rivendell could really be considered confined he still preferred the open space the balcony offered. He realised he had not been asleep for long and knew he had still some time left before he had to return. Staring into the sky with unseeing eyes he tried to empty his head of all thoughts.
Suddenly he heard someone speak and he quickly huddled up in his corner of the balcony.
'Mithrandir has left already, you say?'
'Yes, Palansoron told me he had left yesterday evening.'
The voices were becoming louder and louder as the Elves approached Estel's hiding place and suddenly Estel recognized one of them. It was Lindor, a talkative Elf who was known for his ability to go on and on about a certain matter for days. The Elves were nearing still but when they arrived only yards of the entrance to the balcony they stopped and Estel could hear them seat themselves on one of the benches Rivendell was rich in.
On the balcony Estel mentally groaned, 'Not only have I the luck that it has to be Lindor of all Elves passing by, now he also decides to take a seat right in front of the only escape route I have!'
Time went by as the two Elves talked about this and that, and Estel was getting desperate in trying to find a solution to his predicament. The balcony was too high to jump from and he still didn't trust himself to be able to climb down. The only way seemed to be for Lindor and his companion to leave but it seemed they had absolutely no intention of doing so as they had just begun discussing the Tale of the Sun and the Moon.
As the time draw near to the moment Angafanaion would check on him, Estel grew desperate and risked a glance around the corner of his terrace of freedom that had become rather a terrace of captivity. Quickly he withdrew his head as he discovered that the two Elves were sitting even closer than he had estimated.
Moments later he heard a soft cry of frustration and hurried feet which he recognised to be Angafanaion's. He slid down the posts of the balcony again and draped the blanket over his shoulders as were it a cloak and resolved to wait for his fate which, he was sure of, included the inevitable lecture. 'Whatever will be, will be. Right now I really don't have the energy to challenge my fate.'
Not long after Estel heard the agitated voice of Angafanaion.
'It is as I thought, my lord. Did I not tell you he looked too angelic? When I was speaking to Lord Glorfindel this afternoon I told him the Adan was up to something, but he did not believe me! He said I had a too vivid imagination!'
Angafanaion puffed indignantly, 'Too vivid imagination, hmpf!'
'I have seen the glint in my son's eyes too, Angafanaion,' Elrond's gentle voice answered. 'I knew he would not stay in bed and have waited all day for him to carry out his plan.'
'You knew?' the Healer asked, momentarily stunned. Then he composed himself, giving up his attempt to fathom the mystery of the mind of the Lord of Rivendell, 'Do you know where he is now?'
'No, but I have a fairly sure suspicion,' Elrond answered, walking directly in the direction of the balcony.
At this point Estel had no doubt his father would find him and stood up, tugging the dark brown blanket closer around him as if it would protect him against his father's anger.
Indeed, Elrond walked towards the balcony where his son was hidden without any hesitation.
'Estel,' he acknowledged the Adan and not waiting for an answer he turned and expected his son to follow him, what was exactly what Estel did. As he passed Angafanaion Estel cringed slightly at the murderous glance the brown haired Elf scorched him with and hurried to catch up with his father.
As they arrived in the cream-coloured room, Estel quietly and compliantly crawled back into the bed while Elrond seated himself on the ridge of it.
'I'm sorry, ada, but I simply had to smell fresh air.'
To Estel's amazement Elrond did not express his disappointment, nor did he said anything about the impatience of youth. Instead, he smiled!
'I know, nin ion, and I did not expect anything less from you.'
Seeing that his father was not upset Estel ventured to ask, 'How did you know where I was?'
Elrond's smile widened even further. 'Estel, I know you. I knew you would go somewhere into the fresh air; the nearest place was the balcony I found you on.
'However,' Elrond's voice took on a sterner tone. 'I take it that as you are healthy enough to go on such an escapade, you are also healthy enough for a serious talk.'
Estel cast his eyes down and scowling he realised he had been cleverly set up by his father. 'He knew all the time I was well again, but he waited until I'd pull a stunt like this, so he could force me to talk! I would never agree to this 'talk' of him, but now I have no defence! It's too late to hide behind my injuries!'
He sighed, 'I guess I am.'
TBC in the second part of chapter tenAdan = Human
Ada = dad(dy)
Nin ion = my son
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Please R & R