In the last chapter: The group ends up getting a trip to Canada, and head
off to the airport, only to find the Kaiba brothers also going! To make
things worse Yugi has to pretend to be a baby and then the plane starts to
plummet!
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! And if you're reading this then you obviously don't either!
A/N: Well, here's the 2nd chapter. I was trying to go for making it shorter then the 1st, but do you think I could actually do that?! Another thing to mention is this is where some hick bashing starts, as well as the use of almost every redneck stereotype in the book! I hold nothing against them, as I'm bordering the line of nearly being one, but I did feel the need to bash. You have been warned!
Everyone stopped and took a much-needed breath.
Everyone: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Joey: AHHHHHH! I'm Dieing! I'm Dieing! I'm Dead! I'm Dead! (Hands over his head, and chanting over and over)
Bakura: Oh, shut the hell up! (Whaps him over the head) You're not dead yet, unfortunately.
Seto: Would you shut up back there! I don't want to die on the same plane as a dog!!!!
Mokuba: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! I think I'm gonna hurl!
Seto: (0_0 Sweatdrop)
Yami: Well yugi this looks like the end! (Clutching Yugi like a rag doll and cutting off his air) It was fun while it lasted!
Serenity: (Strangling the old lady beside her) LET ME OFF!!!!!!!!!!!! LET ME OFF!!!! LET ME OFF!!!! GET ME OFF THIS PLANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Passes out)
Tea and Tristan: (Silence)........ AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
Then suddenly a voice came over the speakers.
Voice: This is your Captain speaking. What we are experiencing right now is some severe turbulence, which should subside when we level off. Please remain calm and in your seats until then, and thank you for your cooperation.
Everyone: (Sweatdrop) Oh.
Joey: Hahaha (scratching the back of his head) I never once thought we were gonna die!
Bakura: And that would be why you insisted it was your death over and over again?
Joey: Yeah, I was joking!
Bakura: I should kill you.
Joey: 0_0
~Many, many hours later~
Mokuba: Wow Seto, look outside the window. It looks like a badly made checkerboard.
Seto: (Peers over his brother, to the window) Those are fields.
Outside was a huge expanse of fields in all different shapes and colors lining the landscape.
Ryou: Those look like fields. (Pointing out the window)
Yugi: Really? Can I see?
Yami: Yes! Go! Please, I can't feel my legs anymore! Sit on anyone's lap but mine! (Passes him over to Ryou)
Yugi: Oh, cool! There's so many of them, I didn't know people farmed in. Where are we now?
Ryou: I think last I heard we were just entering Alberta.
Serenity: (Turning around in her seat) Good, so we should be there soon. I don't think I can stand being on this plane much longer.
Ryou: But you weren't even awake for most of it, you passed out, remember?
Serenity: Just because I wasn't awake, didn't mean we didn't die again and again in my dreams!
Yami, Yugi, Ryou: (Sweatdrop) Right.
Yet again the Captain came on over the speakers with another announcement.
Captain: We should be landing in Calgary in approximately twenty minutes, as we are a little ahead of time. I hope you have enjoyed your flight, and Econo Airlines and its employees would like to thank you for flying with us. Have a nice day!
Tristan: Enjoyed the flight? They have some nerve asking that!
Tea: Yeah, someone should sue the company! (Turning around in her seat to give a questioning glance at Kaiba.
Seto: What? What did you expect me to do, not sue! Ha! Econo Airlines is going down!
Mokuba: Yay! We're suing another company!!!
Tristan, Tea: (Sweatdrop)
Tea: Umm, Mokuba. Have you ever thought that maybe you should get a better role model?
Mokuba: Nope! I wanna be like Mr. Burns when I grow up! Just like my brother is!
Tristan: Didn't think so.
~Twenty Minutes Later~
As soon as the plane came to a stop everyone jumped up from their seats, grabbed their carry on luggage and started to make their way down the aisle with the rest of the crowd.
Joey: Outa my way! Coming through! (Pushing a group of old people out of the way)
Old man: No, you get outa my way sonny! (Trips Joey with his cane)
Joey: AHHHH! (Falling over on the floor) WHY YOU!!!
Seto: (Walking up to the scene with a smirk) Well, well, it looks as if you've finally found your place. On the floor! Dog!
Joey: (lunging at Kaiba) DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
Everyone: (-_-) Sweatdrop.
Several long minutes later, which involved a few security guards, the group was off the plane and through security. Amazingly they had even managed to get all their luggage too, which was now being pushed on two carts; One for the Kaiba brothers and one for everyone else.
Yugi: Look! (Gesturing for the group to look at 'Budget Car Rentals' beside airport arrivals) I think that's where we are supposed to go to get the two rental cars that come with winning the contest.
Tea: Cool, I've always wondered what it would be like to rent a car?
Bakura: That's what you wonder about? How pathetic!
Yami: (Muttering under his breath) For once, I actually agree.
Mokuba: You know, that's really funny, because 'Budget' is where I rented our car for our trip!
Seto: (0_0) Sweatdrop.
Tea: Really?
Seto: *_* .
Mokuba: Yep! We got a Toyota!
Seto: (+_+). Shoot me!!
Yugi started forward towards the front desk followed by everyone else.
Yugi: Hello?
At the front desk was a middle-aged lady who seemed to be ignoring him completely, reading a magazine about gardening.
Yugi: Um, hello? Can you help us?
Lady: .
Yami: Aibou, she might be deaf, maybe you should yell a little at her?
Yugi: Good idea. (turns to the lady) HELLO!!!!!! WE NEED A CAR!!!!!!
Lady: AAAHHHHH!!! Holy shit! A midget! (jumping off her seat) Um, I'm so sorry, I didn't see you there!
Yugi: (With tears starting to fall) That's okay, I'm used to it.
Lady: So, how may I help you?
Tristan: (Walking up to the front desk) Well his Grandpa won a contest (pointing to the aforementioned 'midget') and two cars were supposed to be included in the tour package.
Lady: Oh, okay. What is the name under?
Yugi: Mouto.
The lady started to type very fast on her computer while mumbling a few incoherent things. Mouto? Mouto?. Sorry, your name isn't on the computer.
Everyone: (0_0) WHAT!!!!!!!!!!
Lady: Perhaps it is under a different name, eh?
Joey: Hehe! She said "Eh"!
Tea: Joey this isn't the time, we don't even have a vehicle!
Yugi: (Turning back to the lady at the desk) No, I don't think it would be under any other name. Are you sure it isn't under Mouto?
Lady: Positive. I'm very sorry to tell you this, but a lot of those contests aren't all they're cracked up to be. *_* I mean, why in the world would anyone want to go to Alberta, Canada?
Meanwhile, the Kaiba brothers were in the lineup behind them, and of course were catching a good amount of the conversation.
Seto: (Thinking to himself) 'Oh this is good!'
Yugi: Okay, then would it be possible to rent a couple of cars?
Lady: I'm very sorry to say this, but we only have one vehicle left.
Seto: 'This is AWESOME!' ^_^
Yugi: And what type of vehicle would that be?
Joey: Please be a sweet car. please be a sweet car.
Lady: Actually, it's a limo.
Group: YAY!!!!!!!!!! (^_^) A sweet car!!!!!!!!!!
Seto: 'Shit! They got a better car then me! Stupid. crappy. Toyota!'
Lady: . Van.
Seto: ^_^ Oh yeah! Suckers! 'Oops I guess I said that out loud, oh well!'
Mokuba: What's a limo van?
Everyone else with looks of equal confusion turn to look at Seto, who is snickering and about ready to go into hysterical laughter on the floor.
Yami: Limo van?
Ryou: Yes, what exactly is a limo van? Is it a limo, a van, or a bizarre mix of both?
Tea: Care to share?
Seto: Okay, since you idiots have no idea what a limo van is, I guess I get the enjoyment of informing you. (Takes a deep breath to calm his snickering) I am sure you are all aware of those really demented sightseeing tours old people go on?
Joey: Yep!
Tea: Uh huh.
Everyone else just nods in agreement.
Seto: So I'm also sure you know of the big, ugly touring vans they drive around?
Everyone: Yes.
Seto: Put two and two together, but don't bother getting back to me when you finally figure it out. That is if you ever do.
Everyone: .
Seto: Have a nice day; I'm off to get my car now. (Him and Mokuba walk to the front desk.)
Everyone: .
And then finally, as if by a miracle, someone figures it out.
Bakura: BLOODY RA! IT'S A TOURING VAN!!! (O_O)
Joey: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Dat can't be right!!!!
Serenity: Oh, but it is. it might not be so bad though; maybe it'll even be fun in a big van together.
Ryou: Yes, we need to stay positive to have a good time.
Bakura: You're a dumb ass. (-_-)
Lady: (over hearing) Did I mention it's a really old limo van?
Everyone: (Sweatdrop) .
Lady: Hmm, guess not. Feel free to think it over for a minute. Anyways, sir can I help you? (Turning to Seto)
Seto: Yes, my brother phoned about two weeks ago to rent a car.
Mokuba: It's under the name Mokuba Kaiba.
Then lady started to type on her computer again, searching for the name.
Lady: Well, today isn't really anyone's day, now is it? I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but there is no car reserved under that name.
Seto: WHAT!!!!!!!! THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!! (O_O)
Joey: Hahahaha! You don't even have a stupid limo van!
Lady: I'm very sorry. We recently fired one of our student employees, because she would take phone calls and never file any of the information. She was still working a couple of weeks ago and it's likely that's what happened.
Seto: . (Looking pissed) -_-
Lady: If you are friends with these people, (gestures at Yugi's group) maybe you could travel with them?
Seto: . (Starting to look murderous) .
Lady: Here, (hands him a piece of paper) have a coupon for a free rental car in Japan.
Seto: . (and insane) (+_+) 'think calm thoughts. think calm thoughts. think about Mokuba. don't go and ruin his trip..'(Grabs a few Tylenol out of his trench coat pocket and swallows them in one gulp.)
Joey: Hell's gonna freeze over, before he comes with us, lady!
Bakura: I 2nd that motion!
Mokuba: Hey, Seto, maybe there's a different car rental place that still has cars?
Seto: . 'inhale.exhale.' Now what did you say?
Lady: You know what? I think all of the other companies have the same problem as us. It's just been so busy around here, summer vacation and all.
Now everyone had turned to look at Seto, who was presently staring off into space, breathing rather deeply and mumbling something under his breath.
Mokuba: Seto, are you okay?
Seto: .
Yugi: Kaiba, I know it's bad, but maybe we'll let you come with us and everything will be okay. (^_^)
Seto: .
Joey: What are ya talking 'bout!? He can't come with us!
Yugi: But look at him. (points at Seto, who was now engrossed in a piece of lint from his pocket.) Plus, I kinda worry about his mental health. (gives the international sign for 'screw loose' beside his head.)
Tea: I guess he can come with us; it's the right thing to do. Extend the hand of friendship. (and blah, blah, blah she went)
Yugi: All those in favor of Kaiba coming with us raise your hand.
Tea had her hand raised, as well as Serenity and Ryou, but Tristan, Bakura, Joey and Yami had their hands down.
Yugi: Yami! How could you?!! (O_O)
Yami: Sorry aibou, but I want to have a good trip.
Yugi: Doesn't matter anyways, my vote counts, which evens the score. And Mokuba hasn't even voted yet!
Bakura: I say we kill the deciding voter! All in favor?
Five hands shoot up in the air, and five pairs of beady eyes shoot glares at little Mokuba.
Yugi: Ryou, I thought you were on my side?
Ryou: I was, but my Yami isn't exactly as forgiving as yours.
Bakura chose that precise moment to send a malicious glance at Yugi.
Yugi: I see. (Sighs) Come on people, look at poor little Mokuba, don't you have it in your hearts to make a child's dream come true!
Tea, Yugi and Serenity grab Mokuba and hold him out in front, making him look like quite the pathetic case.
Ryou: Well. He's hardly World Vision material.
Joey: But he does look pathetic!
Tristen: And he's giving us that 'little kid' look. I. simple . can't .say . no. to .it. Crap!
Yami: Oh fine, they can come, but on the condition that Seto has absolutely no say in any decision-making!
Bakura: . No!
Ryou: Please????? ^_^
Bakura: . No!
Tea: No big deal, majority rules. Bakura you'll just have to deal.
Bakura: I'll kill you all in your sleep.
No one heard Bakura say it though, as they had already gone up to the front desk to get the keys and sign the paper work.
Lady: Have a nice day, and thank you for choosing Budget!
They started to walk out the doors too, until they noticed that Seto wasn't coming. he was still just starting off into space like a statue.
Yami: Are you coming?
Seto: .
Yugi: I think we should go check on him.
So, everyone started back the way they came, and gathered around Kaiba.
Serenity: It's freaky; he looks like he's dead.
Joey: Yeah, I don't think he's blinked! Scary! (goes and huddles up next to Yami and Yugi.)
Mokuba: Big brother?
Seto: .
Tea: He's acting like a catatonic or something. maybe its shock.
Tristen: Okay, so he'll probably get over it then. Let's just shove him on the baggage cart!
Joey: Good idea, on 3.
Everyone grabbed a piece of Kaiba (a/n wish I could too!) and threw him on top of all the bags.
~In the parking lot~
Tea: No way! (O_O)
Yami: That's it!
Joey: It's held together with Boundo and duck tape!
Parked in front of them was without a doubt, the biggest piece of shit they had ever laid eyes on. It was a large touring van, with blue paint that was half rusted off. The bumper was attached with what looked to be duck tape, and on the top of the van was a boat rack that was falling apart.
Seto: (from atop the luggage cart) . no.
Everyone: (O_O)
Mokuba: Big brother! You can talk! (^_^)
Seto: . no.
Tea: Anyone else get the impression he doesn't want to ride in the van?
Joey: Then he's gonna get in first!!! (Looking like Christmas had come early)
Within a few minutes everyone was in the van. Seto was sitting rather tensely in the very back seat, although he had started to mutter about the 'embarrassment of being in a beater' and everyone figured that meant he was getting better, unfortunately. Mokuba was sitting beside him, and in the seat in front of them were Bakura, Ryou, and Serenity. In the front bench seat sat Yugi, Yami and Tea, and the driver was. Joey! With co-pilot Tristan of course!
Serenity: I don't want to die.
Joey: (^_^) Don't worry, I know what I'm doing! I've gotta license!
Tristan: Yeah, but they drive on the right side of the road over here!
Joey: Oh. uh, well does anyone gotta map?
Tea: Yeah, here, please don't get us killed! (Handing a road map up to him.)
20 minutes later they were driving through the outskirts of Calgary (a/n sorry if this isn't correct, but I'm not really sure where the airport is in the city, as I'm not even from Alberta!)
Seto: So, tell me again where were going?
Tea: Well it says here, (pulls out tour package info) that we have a circle tour that goes from Calgary to Medicine Hat, and then into the province of Saskatchewan, North through the province, then back into Alberta to Edmonton, and then south along the Rocky Mountains until we get to Calgary again! And we have accommodations provided at stops along the way for the full two weeks!
Everyone: . What?
Tea: Oh, never mind. Just follow the stops listed and we'll be all right.
Joey: Okay, I can do dat!
Tristan: Yeah, and I'll read the map!
Seto: So basically were just driving through 'no mans land' for two weeks straight?
Mokuba: Yep! Isn't it great!!???. (Making a cute pouting face)
Seto: Umm, yeah, whatever.
After a few hours of wrong turns, wrong lanes, and road rage the group pulled over at a gas station, to fill up on gas and junk food, and to use the bathrooms. Everyone was out of the 'beater' and in a mad dash for the toilets.
Joey: Gota pee! Gotta pee! Outa my way!
Seto: Dogs pee outside! (Shoving him out of the way)
Tea: Humph, guys, they're so immature!
Serenity: You've got that right! (Starts walking towards the ladies room) Oh look, it's only got one stall.
Tea: It's mine!!!!
~Several minutes later~
Yugi: That's much better! ^_^ (walking out of the bathrooms)
Yami: Yeah, I thought I was going to explode if I didn't pee.
Joey and Tristan were already paying for the armfuls of snacks they had grabbed and Ryou was sent back out side with Bakura to pump gas. Seto was still in the bathroom waiting for Mokuba, and the girls were just on their way to the van.
Tea: Oh look, is that a cowboy?
The guy she was pointing out was probably in his teens and wearing a big, black cowboy hat, an ugly white button-up wrangler shirt, and disturbingly tight black jeans, which left little to the imagination.
Cowboy: (tipping his hat) Ladies.
Serenity & Tea: (giggle) Hehe, Howdy!
Cowboy: You two must not be from around here, if you don't mind me saying so.
Tea: No, we're on vacation here.
Serenity: My name's Serenity and this is my friend Tea. ^_^
Cowboy: Well it's nice meeting you two ladies. I'm Brendan.
Meanwhile, over at the gas pumps stood Ryou, doing all the work, while his Yami watched.
Bakura: Ahh, what is that?!? O_O (Pointing to where Tea and Serenity stood.)
Ryou: I can't be certain, but I think that's a real life cowboy.
Bakura: What the hell is a 'cowboy'?
Ryou: I don't know really, I think it's more like a cliché for someone who dresses like they did in the old west and chases cows and such.
Bakura: And the pants that ride up their ass?
Ryou: Well, it must have some important reason I'm sure.
Back inside the gas station Joey and Tristan had just finished paying for their stuff, and Yugi, Yami, Seto, and Mokuba were picking out their own snacks and drinks for the road. And standing beside them staring at a tin of frozen orange juice was the biggest redneck any of them had ever laid eyes on. He looked to be in his forties with a big bear belly sticking out of his undersized shirt, which read 'Rather be Fishing'.
Mokuba: Hey mister, what's wrong with the can? (Points at the can of orange juice he's holding.)
Redneck: It 'ere says, concentrate. I'm concentrating and ain't nothing's happening.
Seto: Mokuba, get away from the mentally deranged man. (Gesturing wildly at his little brother to back away.)
Redneck: Who ya calling mentally deranged ya yuppie!
Seto: You imbecile! Do you even know who I am? -_- (Walking up to the redneck rather boldly.)
Yami: Kaiba, maybe we should just leave him. (Stepping in front of a panicked Yugi)
Redneck: I don' give a damn who ya'll are, I'm Cletus, and I don't like yer attitude!
Seto: Oh, and what are you going to do about it?
Cletus: Martha! Get my gun!
Seto, Yami, Mokuba, Yugi: (O_O) UH OH!!!
A/N: Well that's all for now, until my next update. Hope you enjoyed reading, and if you didn't, that's all right too! One thing I do hope you do though is review! Please! Pretty please! You'll make my day, plus get your say in as well. Till next time, review!
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! And if you're reading this then you obviously don't either!
A/N: Well, here's the 2nd chapter. I was trying to go for making it shorter then the 1st, but do you think I could actually do that?! Another thing to mention is this is where some hick bashing starts, as well as the use of almost every redneck stereotype in the book! I hold nothing against them, as I'm bordering the line of nearly being one, but I did feel the need to bash. You have been warned!
Everyone stopped and took a much-needed breath.
Everyone: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Joey: AHHHHHH! I'm Dieing! I'm Dieing! I'm Dead! I'm Dead! (Hands over his head, and chanting over and over)
Bakura: Oh, shut the hell up! (Whaps him over the head) You're not dead yet, unfortunately.
Seto: Would you shut up back there! I don't want to die on the same plane as a dog!!!!
Mokuba: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! I think I'm gonna hurl!
Seto: (0_0 Sweatdrop)
Yami: Well yugi this looks like the end! (Clutching Yugi like a rag doll and cutting off his air) It was fun while it lasted!
Serenity: (Strangling the old lady beside her) LET ME OFF!!!!!!!!!!!! LET ME OFF!!!! LET ME OFF!!!! GET ME OFF THIS PLANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Passes out)
Tea and Tristan: (Silence)........ AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
Then suddenly a voice came over the speakers.
Voice: This is your Captain speaking. What we are experiencing right now is some severe turbulence, which should subside when we level off. Please remain calm and in your seats until then, and thank you for your cooperation.
Everyone: (Sweatdrop) Oh.
Joey: Hahaha (scratching the back of his head) I never once thought we were gonna die!
Bakura: And that would be why you insisted it was your death over and over again?
Joey: Yeah, I was joking!
Bakura: I should kill you.
Joey: 0_0
~Many, many hours later~
Mokuba: Wow Seto, look outside the window. It looks like a badly made checkerboard.
Seto: (Peers over his brother, to the window) Those are fields.
Outside was a huge expanse of fields in all different shapes and colors lining the landscape.
Ryou: Those look like fields. (Pointing out the window)
Yugi: Really? Can I see?
Yami: Yes! Go! Please, I can't feel my legs anymore! Sit on anyone's lap but mine! (Passes him over to Ryou)
Yugi: Oh, cool! There's so many of them, I didn't know people farmed in. Where are we now?
Ryou: I think last I heard we were just entering Alberta.
Serenity: (Turning around in her seat) Good, so we should be there soon. I don't think I can stand being on this plane much longer.
Ryou: But you weren't even awake for most of it, you passed out, remember?
Serenity: Just because I wasn't awake, didn't mean we didn't die again and again in my dreams!
Yami, Yugi, Ryou: (Sweatdrop) Right.
Yet again the Captain came on over the speakers with another announcement.
Captain: We should be landing in Calgary in approximately twenty minutes, as we are a little ahead of time. I hope you have enjoyed your flight, and Econo Airlines and its employees would like to thank you for flying with us. Have a nice day!
Tristan: Enjoyed the flight? They have some nerve asking that!
Tea: Yeah, someone should sue the company! (Turning around in her seat to give a questioning glance at Kaiba.
Seto: What? What did you expect me to do, not sue! Ha! Econo Airlines is going down!
Mokuba: Yay! We're suing another company!!!
Tristan, Tea: (Sweatdrop)
Tea: Umm, Mokuba. Have you ever thought that maybe you should get a better role model?
Mokuba: Nope! I wanna be like Mr. Burns when I grow up! Just like my brother is!
Tristan: Didn't think so.
~Twenty Minutes Later~
As soon as the plane came to a stop everyone jumped up from their seats, grabbed their carry on luggage and started to make their way down the aisle with the rest of the crowd.
Joey: Outa my way! Coming through! (Pushing a group of old people out of the way)
Old man: No, you get outa my way sonny! (Trips Joey with his cane)
Joey: AHHHH! (Falling over on the floor) WHY YOU!!!
Seto: (Walking up to the scene with a smirk) Well, well, it looks as if you've finally found your place. On the floor! Dog!
Joey: (lunging at Kaiba) DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
Everyone: (-_-) Sweatdrop.
Several long minutes later, which involved a few security guards, the group was off the plane and through security. Amazingly they had even managed to get all their luggage too, which was now being pushed on two carts; One for the Kaiba brothers and one for everyone else.
Yugi: Look! (Gesturing for the group to look at 'Budget Car Rentals' beside airport arrivals) I think that's where we are supposed to go to get the two rental cars that come with winning the contest.
Tea: Cool, I've always wondered what it would be like to rent a car?
Bakura: That's what you wonder about? How pathetic!
Yami: (Muttering under his breath) For once, I actually agree.
Mokuba: You know, that's really funny, because 'Budget' is where I rented our car for our trip!
Seto: (0_0) Sweatdrop.
Tea: Really?
Seto: *_* .
Mokuba: Yep! We got a Toyota!
Seto: (+_+). Shoot me!!
Yugi started forward towards the front desk followed by everyone else.
Yugi: Hello?
At the front desk was a middle-aged lady who seemed to be ignoring him completely, reading a magazine about gardening.
Yugi: Um, hello? Can you help us?
Lady: .
Yami: Aibou, she might be deaf, maybe you should yell a little at her?
Yugi: Good idea. (turns to the lady) HELLO!!!!!! WE NEED A CAR!!!!!!
Lady: AAAHHHHH!!! Holy shit! A midget! (jumping off her seat) Um, I'm so sorry, I didn't see you there!
Yugi: (With tears starting to fall) That's okay, I'm used to it.
Lady: So, how may I help you?
Tristan: (Walking up to the front desk) Well his Grandpa won a contest (pointing to the aforementioned 'midget') and two cars were supposed to be included in the tour package.
Lady: Oh, okay. What is the name under?
Yugi: Mouto.
The lady started to type very fast on her computer while mumbling a few incoherent things. Mouto? Mouto?. Sorry, your name isn't on the computer.
Everyone: (0_0) WHAT!!!!!!!!!!
Lady: Perhaps it is under a different name, eh?
Joey: Hehe! She said "Eh"!
Tea: Joey this isn't the time, we don't even have a vehicle!
Yugi: (Turning back to the lady at the desk) No, I don't think it would be under any other name. Are you sure it isn't under Mouto?
Lady: Positive. I'm very sorry to tell you this, but a lot of those contests aren't all they're cracked up to be. *_* I mean, why in the world would anyone want to go to Alberta, Canada?
Meanwhile, the Kaiba brothers were in the lineup behind them, and of course were catching a good amount of the conversation.
Seto: (Thinking to himself) 'Oh this is good!'
Yugi: Okay, then would it be possible to rent a couple of cars?
Lady: I'm very sorry to say this, but we only have one vehicle left.
Seto: 'This is AWESOME!' ^_^
Yugi: And what type of vehicle would that be?
Joey: Please be a sweet car. please be a sweet car.
Lady: Actually, it's a limo.
Group: YAY!!!!!!!!!! (^_^) A sweet car!!!!!!!!!!
Seto: 'Shit! They got a better car then me! Stupid. crappy. Toyota!'
Lady: . Van.
Seto: ^_^ Oh yeah! Suckers! 'Oops I guess I said that out loud, oh well!'
Mokuba: What's a limo van?
Everyone else with looks of equal confusion turn to look at Seto, who is snickering and about ready to go into hysterical laughter on the floor.
Yami: Limo van?
Ryou: Yes, what exactly is a limo van? Is it a limo, a van, or a bizarre mix of both?
Tea: Care to share?
Seto: Okay, since you idiots have no idea what a limo van is, I guess I get the enjoyment of informing you. (Takes a deep breath to calm his snickering) I am sure you are all aware of those really demented sightseeing tours old people go on?
Joey: Yep!
Tea: Uh huh.
Everyone else just nods in agreement.
Seto: So I'm also sure you know of the big, ugly touring vans they drive around?
Everyone: Yes.
Seto: Put two and two together, but don't bother getting back to me when you finally figure it out. That is if you ever do.
Everyone: .
Seto: Have a nice day; I'm off to get my car now. (Him and Mokuba walk to the front desk.)
Everyone: .
And then finally, as if by a miracle, someone figures it out.
Bakura: BLOODY RA! IT'S A TOURING VAN!!! (O_O)
Joey: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Dat can't be right!!!!
Serenity: Oh, but it is. it might not be so bad though; maybe it'll even be fun in a big van together.
Ryou: Yes, we need to stay positive to have a good time.
Bakura: You're a dumb ass. (-_-)
Lady: (over hearing) Did I mention it's a really old limo van?
Everyone: (Sweatdrop) .
Lady: Hmm, guess not. Feel free to think it over for a minute. Anyways, sir can I help you? (Turning to Seto)
Seto: Yes, my brother phoned about two weeks ago to rent a car.
Mokuba: It's under the name Mokuba Kaiba.
Then lady started to type on her computer again, searching for the name.
Lady: Well, today isn't really anyone's day, now is it? I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but there is no car reserved under that name.
Seto: WHAT!!!!!!!! THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!! (O_O)
Joey: Hahahaha! You don't even have a stupid limo van!
Lady: I'm very sorry. We recently fired one of our student employees, because she would take phone calls and never file any of the information. She was still working a couple of weeks ago and it's likely that's what happened.
Seto: . (Looking pissed) -_-
Lady: If you are friends with these people, (gestures at Yugi's group) maybe you could travel with them?
Seto: . (Starting to look murderous) .
Lady: Here, (hands him a piece of paper) have a coupon for a free rental car in Japan.
Seto: . (and insane) (+_+) 'think calm thoughts. think calm thoughts. think about Mokuba. don't go and ruin his trip..'(Grabs a few Tylenol out of his trench coat pocket and swallows them in one gulp.)
Joey: Hell's gonna freeze over, before he comes with us, lady!
Bakura: I 2nd that motion!
Mokuba: Hey, Seto, maybe there's a different car rental place that still has cars?
Seto: . 'inhale.exhale.' Now what did you say?
Lady: You know what? I think all of the other companies have the same problem as us. It's just been so busy around here, summer vacation and all.
Now everyone had turned to look at Seto, who was presently staring off into space, breathing rather deeply and mumbling something under his breath.
Mokuba: Seto, are you okay?
Seto: .
Yugi: Kaiba, I know it's bad, but maybe we'll let you come with us and everything will be okay. (^_^)
Seto: .
Joey: What are ya talking 'bout!? He can't come with us!
Yugi: But look at him. (points at Seto, who was now engrossed in a piece of lint from his pocket.) Plus, I kinda worry about his mental health. (gives the international sign for 'screw loose' beside his head.)
Tea: I guess he can come with us; it's the right thing to do. Extend the hand of friendship. (and blah, blah, blah she went)
Yugi: All those in favor of Kaiba coming with us raise your hand.
Tea had her hand raised, as well as Serenity and Ryou, but Tristan, Bakura, Joey and Yami had their hands down.
Yugi: Yami! How could you?!! (O_O)
Yami: Sorry aibou, but I want to have a good trip.
Yugi: Doesn't matter anyways, my vote counts, which evens the score. And Mokuba hasn't even voted yet!
Bakura: I say we kill the deciding voter! All in favor?
Five hands shoot up in the air, and five pairs of beady eyes shoot glares at little Mokuba.
Yugi: Ryou, I thought you were on my side?
Ryou: I was, but my Yami isn't exactly as forgiving as yours.
Bakura chose that precise moment to send a malicious glance at Yugi.
Yugi: I see. (Sighs) Come on people, look at poor little Mokuba, don't you have it in your hearts to make a child's dream come true!
Tea, Yugi and Serenity grab Mokuba and hold him out in front, making him look like quite the pathetic case.
Ryou: Well. He's hardly World Vision material.
Joey: But he does look pathetic!
Tristen: And he's giving us that 'little kid' look. I. simple . can't .say . no. to .it. Crap!
Yami: Oh fine, they can come, but on the condition that Seto has absolutely no say in any decision-making!
Bakura: . No!
Ryou: Please????? ^_^
Bakura: . No!
Tea: No big deal, majority rules. Bakura you'll just have to deal.
Bakura: I'll kill you all in your sleep.
No one heard Bakura say it though, as they had already gone up to the front desk to get the keys and sign the paper work.
Lady: Have a nice day, and thank you for choosing Budget!
They started to walk out the doors too, until they noticed that Seto wasn't coming. he was still just starting off into space like a statue.
Yami: Are you coming?
Seto: .
Yugi: I think we should go check on him.
So, everyone started back the way they came, and gathered around Kaiba.
Serenity: It's freaky; he looks like he's dead.
Joey: Yeah, I don't think he's blinked! Scary! (goes and huddles up next to Yami and Yugi.)
Mokuba: Big brother?
Seto: .
Tea: He's acting like a catatonic or something. maybe its shock.
Tristen: Okay, so he'll probably get over it then. Let's just shove him on the baggage cart!
Joey: Good idea, on 3.
Everyone grabbed a piece of Kaiba (a/n wish I could too!) and threw him on top of all the bags.
~In the parking lot~
Tea: No way! (O_O)
Yami: That's it!
Joey: It's held together with Boundo and duck tape!
Parked in front of them was without a doubt, the biggest piece of shit they had ever laid eyes on. It was a large touring van, with blue paint that was half rusted off. The bumper was attached with what looked to be duck tape, and on the top of the van was a boat rack that was falling apart.
Seto: (from atop the luggage cart) . no.
Everyone: (O_O)
Mokuba: Big brother! You can talk! (^_^)
Seto: . no.
Tea: Anyone else get the impression he doesn't want to ride in the van?
Joey: Then he's gonna get in first!!! (Looking like Christmas had come early)
Within a few minutes everyone was in the van. Seto was sitting rather tensely in the very back seat, although he had started to mutter about the 'embarrassment of being in a beater' and everyone figured that meant he was getting better, unfortunately. Mokuba was sitting beside him, and in the seat in front of them were Bakura, Ryou, and Serenity. In the front bench seat sat Yugi, Yami and Tea, and the driver was. Joey! With co-pilot Tristan of course!
Serenity: I don't want to die.
Joey: (^_^) Don't worry, I know what I'm doing! I've gotta license!
Tristan: Yeah, but they drive on the right side of the road over here!
Joey: Oh. uh, well does anyone gotta map?
Tea: Yeah, here, please don't get us killed! (Handing a road map up to him.)
20 minutes later they were driving through the outskirts of Calgary (a/n sorry if this isn't correct, but I'm not really sure where the airport is in the city, as I'm not even from Alberta!)
Seto: So, tell me again where were going?
Tea: Well it says here, (pulls out tour package info) that we have a circle tour that goes from Calgary to Medicine Hat, and then into the province of Saskatchewan, North through the province, then back into Alberta to Edmonton, and then south along the Rocky Mountains until we get to Calgary again! And we have accommodations provided at stops along the way for the full two weeks!
Everyone: . What?
Tea: Oh, never mind. Just follow the stops listed and we'll be all right.
Joey: Okay, I can do dat!
Tristan: Yeah, and I'll read the map!
Seto: So basically were just driving through 'no mans land' for two weeks straight?
Mokuba: Yep! Isn't it great!!???. (Making a cute pouting face)
Seto: Umm, yeah, whatever.
After a few hours of wrong turns, wrong lanes, and road rage the group pulled over at a gas station, to fill up on gas and junk food, and to use the bathrooms. Everyone was out of the 'beater' and in a mad dash for the toilets.
Joey: Gota pee! Gotta pee! Outa my way!
Seto: Dogs pee outside! (Shoving him out of the way)
Tea: Humph, guys, they're so immature!
Serenity: You've got that right! (Starts walking towards the ladies room) Oh look, it's only got one stall.
Tea: It's mine!!!!
~Several minutes later~
Yugi: That's much better! ^_^ (walking out of the bathrooms)
Yami: Yeah, I thought I was going to explode if I didn't pee.
Joey and Tristan were already paying for the armfuls of snacks they had grabbed and Ryou was sent back out side with Bakura to pump gas. Seto was still in the bathroom waiting for Mokuba, and the girls were just on their way to the van.
Tea: Oh look, is that a cowboy?
The guy she was pointing out was probably in his teens and wearing a big, black cowboy hat, an ugly white button-up wrangler shirt, and disturbingly tight black jeans, which left little to the imagination.
Cowboy: (tipping his hat) Ladies.
Serenity & Tea: (giggle) Hehe, Howdy!
Cowboy: You two must not be from around here, if you don't mind me saying so.
Tea: No, we're on vacation here.
Serenity: My name's Serenity and this is my friend Tea. ^_^
Cowboy: Well it's nice meeting you two ladies. I'm Brendan.
Meanwhile, over at the gas pumps stood Ryou, doing all the work, while his Yami watched.
Bakura: Ahh, what is that?!? O_O (Pointing to where Tea and Serenity stood.)
Ryou: I can't be certain, but I think that's a real life cowboy.
Bakura: What the hell is a 'cowboy'?
Ryou: I don't know really, I think it's more like a cliché for someone who dresses like they did in the old west and chases cows and such.
Bakura: And the pants that ride up their ass?
Ryou: Well, it must have some important reason I'm sure.
Back inside the gas station Joey and Tristan had just finished paying for their stuff, and Yugi, Yami, Seto, and Mokuba were picking out their own snacks and drinks for the road. And standing beside them staring at a tin of frozen orange juice was the biggest redneck any of them had ever laid eyes on. He looked to be in his forties with a big bear belly sticking out of his undersized shirt, which read 'Rather be Fishing'.
Mokuba: Hey mister, what's wrong with the can? (Points at the can of orange juice he's holding.)
Redneck: It 'ere says, concentrate. I'm concentrating and ain't nothing's happening.
Seto: Mokuba, get away from the mentally deranged man. (Gesturing wildly at his little brother to back away.)
Redneck: Who ya calling mentally deranged ya yuppie!
Seto: You imbecile! Do you even know who I am? -_- (Walking up to the redneck rather boldly.)
Yami: Kaiba, maybe we should just leave him. (Stepping in front of a panicked Yugi)
Redneck: I don' give a damn who ya'll are, I'm Cletus, and I don't like yer attitude!
Seto: Oh, and what are you going to do about it?
Cletus: Martha! Get my gun!
Seto, Yami, Mokuba, Yugi: (O_O) UH OH!!!
A/N: Well that's all for now, until my next update. Hope you enjoyed reading, and if you didn't, that's all right too! One thing I do hope you do though is review! Please! Pretty please! You'll make my day, plus get your say in as well. Till next time, review!