Chapter 21 – Don't Worry
We pull up to the safe house, both tense, both worrying about what's to come, both not talking about it. Eric follows me to the door, even though I didn't ask him too. There are no CIA agents on the look-out; I assume that since I'm now working for the LA division I've finally been deemed trust worthy.
We reach the door, and since there is no one looking I grab him and draw him close and give him a huge hug. I don't want him to leave, I want time to stop, and I want time to breath. I can feel his heart racing on my chest, and his arms draw around me tighter. I whisper into his ear, "Don't go yet. Please." He looks down at me and right then my stomach decides to give a huge growl.
We both laugh, and Eric pulls out his set of keys and opens the door. "You haven't eaten all day, come on, I'll see what I can make for dinner here." I squeeze past him into the house, and grab his hand and pull him in and drag him to the kitchen. "You must be really hungry?" I turn the corner and stop dead; Eric bumps into me. "I didn't mean it in a bad…" he sees her too and his words trail off. "Sydney? What are you doing here?"
I stand in the spot, the world spins again. The joy of the last few hours is gone, I feel like I've just slipped back into a nightmare, but this is reality, so does that make the last few hours a dream. Eric pushes me lightly into the kitchen, and I go right to the cupboards, I don't want to talk to her. Not right now, not after my fears for Cassie have cost her so much. I rumble through them just to find a few different cans of soup.
Eric goes and sits down at the table, taking one of Sydney's hands into his own, "What's the news on Vaughn?" The tone of Eric's voice makes my heart drop; I didn't know he was so close to Vaughn. Why didn't he say something, why didn't he tell me about his stake in this case too? I quickly open the soup and pour it into a bowl and toss it in the microwave and take a seat at the table. Sydney takes a deep breath, and tells us the play by play of what happened in Virginia. I can see tears rise in her eyes when she speaks of her last few moments with Vaughn. She takes a deep breath, and I glace over to Eric, he has tears pressing against his eyes too, but he's trying to keep it together for Sydney. "So they are asking that Sark be traded for Vaughn in five days in Atlanta." Sydney bites her lower lip and looks away from us.
Eric clears his throat, "So I assume you are here so that we can cover your ass, with your father tomorrow for your disappearing tonight to go get Vaughn early."
Sydney shakes her head in agreement, "Zanna I need you to try to remember any place that Cassie slipped off to a lot. Or any odd phone calls they received while you were there or anything that would suggest that she was meeting up with someone for meetings."
I drop my head and close my eyes, trying to remember the time when Calvin thought she was cheating on him; trying to remember all of his evidence of it. The thoughts are so painful, and I try to separate myself from the attachment, but I can't. I slip into the memory, wrapping it around me. It was a cold evening, and Calvin had asked that I meet him at our favorite coffee shop. I was running late, and ended up getting there about an hour late, and as soon as I got there I felt guilty. Calvin was a mess, Cassie had been gone a lot in the evenings and he was worried that she had moved on. Where had he said she was going to? Why can't I remember! "Sydney, I… I can't remember." She reaches in her purse and slides a photo so that when I open my eyes I see it.
She has her photo pointing to one of the men in the picture, and I know immediately what she's thinking, "Did she meet often with this man?" She's pointing to Joshua; to Sark.
I look up and catch Eric giving her a look asking her to stop questioning me on him. He's cheeks burn and he gets up and goes to get the soup from the microwave. "I don't know if he was her contact, but I wouldn't doubt that they met on a few occasions. This was the only night I ever met him, but I know it's because of that night I'm in this mess." Eric comes back and lays the soup down on the table, and starts to rub my back. I want to stop all of this as soon as I can. Why can't I remember where she was going? Why was Calvin suspicious? Why didn't I catch on to her sooner?
Sydney backs off, and turns to Eric, "Why weren't there any agents on watch?"
"Zanna has been transferred into the LA unit, so I'm assuming Jack took away the tails."
"I thought it was going to be a lot tougher coming here to talk to you than it was." Sydney looks at me, but doesn't say anything.
Eric pulls away from me, and turns to Sydney, "You need to be careful. Now that Sloane has Vaughn he knows you aren't going to wait around."
"They won't catch me!"
"Sydney, all we need is to trade Sark for Vaughn and not have you. How will I explain that to Vaughn?"
"We need Vaughn now. We don't need to wait and play Sloane's game!" Sydney is getting distressed. Eric doesn't know what to do, he opens his mouth to apologize but is cut off, "I need to get out of here soon, I'm sure Dad will come looking for me here. I'll try to make contact with you if possible. If not, I'll see you in five days in Atlanta." Sydney pauses looking at me, she upset that she has nothing to go on, and I can see she blames me.
Why can't I remember? I'm letting everyone down, I'm the one who should know this, and I can't remember. "Sydney…" I don't know how to formulate my thoughts, "I… I…" Why can't I remember! Eric grabs my hand, and rubs the top of my hand with his thumb. It's so calming, my mind stops panicking for a second and I seem to reach clarity. "The Brown Bear!" Eric jumps at my exclamation. "She used to go to The Brown Bear all the time, that's why Calvin thought she was having an affair."
Sydney sits back down, "What is The Brown Bear?"
"It's this little coffee shop, Cassie always went there to play piano on open stage night, which just happened to be the same night Calvin would have poker, so he never really went. That has to be her contact, that's the only thing that she never missed, even when she had mono, she made sure she went there." I reach for a piece of paper, and write the address of it on the paper, and slide it too Sydney, "Here." She takes the piece of paper and gets up to leave.
"Thank you." She turns to Eric and gives him a big hug, "You know I can't just leave Vaughn there."
Eric nods his head, "I know, but I don't want to lose you either." Sydney nods, and pulls away; she extends her hand to me. We have an awkward shake and she says goodnight and leaves.
I turn back to Eric, he's stressed, he takes a seat back at the kitchen table and starts to rub his neck. I move closer and remove his hands and rub his neck for him. "We'll see her and Vaughn again."
Eric moves his hands on top of mine, "I'm just not so sure… I'm just not so sure."
We pull up to the safe house, both tense, both worrying about what's to come, both not talking about it. Eric follows me to the door, even though I didn't ask him too. There are no CIA agents on the look-out; I assume that since I'm now working for the LA division I've finally been deemed trust worthy.
We reach the door, and since there is no one looking I grab him and draw him close and give him a huge hug. I don't want him to leave, I want time to stop, and I want time to breath. I can feel his heart racing on my chest, and his arms draw around me tighter. I whisper into his ear, "Don't go yet. Please." He looks down at me and right then my stomach decides to give a huge growl.
We both laugh, and Eric pulls out his set of keys and opens the door. "You haven't eaten all day, come on, I'll see what I can make for dinner here." I squeeze past him into the house, and grab his hand and pull him in and drag him to the kitchen. "You must be really hungry?" I turn the corner and stop dead; Eric bumps into me. "I didn't mean it in a bad…" he sees her too and his words trail off. "Sydney? What are you doing here?"
I stand in the spot, the world spins again. The joy of the last few hours is gone, I feel like I've just slipped back into a nightmare, but this is reality, so does that make the last few hours a dream. Eric pushes me lightly into the kitchen, and I go right to the cupboards, I don't want to talk to her. Not right now, not after my fears for Cassie have cost her so much. I rumble through them just to find a few different cans of soup.
Eric goes and sits down at the table, taking one of Sydney's hands into his own, "What's the news on Vaughn?" The tone of Eric's voice makes my heart drop; I didn't know he was so close to Vaughn. Why didn't he say something, why didn't he tell me about his stake in this case too? I quickly open the soup and pour it into a bowl and toss it in the microwave and take a seat at the table. Sydney takes a deep breath, and tells us the play by play of what happened in Virginia. I can see tears rise in her eyes when she speaks of her last few moments with Vaughn. She takes a deep breath, and I glace over to Eric, he has tears pressing against his eyes too, but he's trying to keep it together for Sydney. "So they are asking that Sark be traded for Vaughn in five days in Atlanta." Sydney bites her lower lip and looks away from us.
Eric clears his throat, "So I assume you are here so that we can cover your ass, with your father tomorrow for your disappearing tonight to go get Vaughn early."
Sydney shakes her head in agreement, "Zanna I need you to try to remember any place that Cassie slipped off to a lot. Or any odd phone calls they received while you were there or anything that would suggest that she was meeting up with someone for meetings."
I drop my head and close my eyes, trying to remember the time when Calvin thought she was cheating on him; trying to remember all of his evidence of it. The thoughts are so painful, and I try to separate myself from the attachment, but I can't. I slip into the memory, wrapping it around me. It was a cold evening, and Calvin had asked that I meet him at our favorite coffee shop. I was running late, and ended up getting there about an hour late, and as soon as I got there I felt guilty. Calvin was a mess, Cassie had been gone a lot in the evenings and he was worried that she had moved on. Where had he said she was going to? Why can't I remember! "Sydney, I… I can't remember." She reaches in her purse and slides a photo so that when I open my eyes I see it.
She has her photo pointing to one of the men in the picture, and I know immediately what she's thinking, "Did she meet often with this man?" She's pointing to Joshua; to Sark.
I look up and catch Eric giving her a look asking her to stop questioning me on him. He's cheeks burn and he gets up and goes to get the soup from the microwave. "I don't know if he was her contact, but I wouldn't doubt that they met on a few occasions. This was the only night I ever met him, but I know it's because of that night I'm in this mess." Eric comes back and lays the soup down on the table, and starts to rub my back. I want to stop all of this as soon as I can. Why can't I remember where she was going? Why was Calvin suspicious? Why didn't I catch on to her sooner?
Sydney backs off, and turns to Eric, "Why weren't there any agents on watch?"
"Zanna has been transferred into the LA unit, so I'm assuming Jack took away the tails."
"I thought it was going to be a lot tougher coming here to talk to you than it was." Sydney looks at me, but doesn't say anything.
Eric pulls away from me, and turns to Sydney, "You need to be careful. Now that Sloane has Vaughn he knows you aren't going to wait around."
"They won't catch me!"
"Sydney, all we need is to trade Sark for Vaughn and not have you. How will I explain that to Vaughn?"
"We need Vaughn now. We don't need to wait and play Sloane's game!" Sydney is getting distressed. Eric doesn't know what to do, he opens his mouth to apologize but is cut off, "I need to get out of here soon, I'm sure Dad will come looking for me here. I'll try to make contact with you if possible. If not, I'll see you in five days in Atlanta." Sydney pauses looking at me, she upset that she has nothing to go on, and I can see she blames me.
Why can't I remember? I'm letting everyone down, I'm the one who should know this, and I can't remember. "Sydney…" I don't know how to formulate my thoughts, "I… I…" Why can't I remember! Eric grabs my hand, and rubs the top of my hand with his thumb. It's so calming, my mind stops panicking for a second and I seem to reach clarity. "The Brown Bear!" Eric jumps at my exclamation. "She used to go to The Brown Bear all the time, that's why Calvin thought she was having an affair."
Sydney sits back down, "What is The Brown Bear?"
"It's this little coffee shop, Cassie always went there to play piano on open stage night, which just happened to be the same night Calvin would have poker, so he never really went. That has to be her contact, that's the only thing that she never missed, even when she had mono, she made sure she went there." I reach for a piece of paper, and write the address of it on the paper, and slide it too Sydney, "Here." She takes the piece of paper and gets up to leave.
"Thank you." She turns to Eric and gives him a big hug, "You know I can't just leave Vaughn there."
Eric nods his head, "I know, but I don't want to lose you either." Sydney nods, and pulls away; she extends her hand to me. We have an awkward shake and she says goodnight and leaves.
I turn back to Eric, he's stressed, he takes a seat back at the kitchen table and starts to rub his neck. I move closer and remove his hands and rub his neck for him. "We'll see her and Vaughn again."
Eric moves his hands on top of mine, "I'm just not so sure… I'm just not so sure."