Call me Samuel. I was walking outside of my parent's house one day, after a writing session that took place earlier that day, when I got a 9mm lobotomy that killed me.

Now, I'm sure you're trying to call my bluff, but it happened the way I said it happened.

The odd thing was, I had it in mind to write a story that revolved around reincarnation to a tremendous degree. I just never expected it to happen like this, though. Who would have?

Here I was, though, sitting with both of my legs curled into me. Why this was a thing, I'm not sure. Maybe it had to do with the fact I was all alone here? I'm not a hundred percent sure.

However, my life was crazy enough the last time around. I mean, the last time something crazy happened, I got shot in the head.

Yeah, not my best moment in time.

What was I supposed to say? Other than, oh, have a pleasant death?

Er… I've been told that I should not practice my sarcasm. Shutting up now.

Still, what had me so peeved, to put it in polite terms, was the fact that I was stuck in this odd cave of sorts, all full of liquid that made it suffocating. It was suffocating… and safe? This is the first I've experienced it, to my immediate knowledge.

Either way, this was a rather odd experience for me, to be honest. I was being suffocated in safety. How does that make sense?

Pro tip: it doesn't.

This was definitely a bad time for me to live, so to speak. Was I even alive? How would I know I was even alive, dagnabbit?

Suddenly, I felt a golden glow surround me, illuminating the darkness that surrounded… me… wait just one second! This looked like I was in my mother's womb! What the hell happened?!

[Welcome to the High School DxD system.]

Wait, the what?!

[Please select your Sacred Gear.]

If this was one of those Gamer-style worlds, I'll be mad, I swear.

[You wish to be mad about getting something of your dreams? Are you senile?]

Er… this was a dream world for me? Then I didn't get a 9mm lobotomy?

[Uh, no, you did. Odd, really, since you didn't live near Detroit or anywhere like that.]

I just had to ask… screw it. If this is really an Isekai, then I might as well get something out of this.

[Just to reiterate it properly, please select your Sacred Gear.]

This thing had to be reacting to my thoughts… what were my options?

Twice Critical

Twilight Healing

Gamer's Sight

Boosted Gear

Three of the four listed were some of the canonical Sacred Gears that made a normal appearance, but what was it with Gamer's Sight? I mean, it sounded kinda like a rip-off of Gamer's Gear from SeerKing's story with a rather entertaining premise…

[About that… it was willed into existence because of your subconscious desire to have a game out of life. Please keep that in mind.]

Oh… oooooooh!

Oh, crap.

[What? Did you not want to be a Gamer?]

Er… no comment. What was I supposed to say? I want to be a Gamer, especially if that was a capital 'G' in Gamer.

[Good thinking, young man. Are you ready to make a choice now?]

I need time to process this, you stupid interface! Sheesh, I hate it when things like this happen!

Still, I had a choice to make, did I not? I picked the Gamer's Sight Sacred Gear.

[Good. Now, of the other three Sacred Gears, which would you like to awaken in the future?]

If I could drop my jaw in shock, I would. I might be like Issei in the same story by SeerKing?! This had to be a joke…

[Actually, I knew I forgot something earlier. Whoops… you have access to a choice of all the Sacred Gears in distribution by now, come to think of it.]

Add bugged-out eyes to the list of things I'd do if I could. What Sacred Gear would be the best for my situation?

I mean, if I were to be fair, I'd love to have access to the Longinus-class Gears, any of them, but what would that say about me? Do I need to get myself stuck in a battle against all odds like Issei did in canon?

Well… might as well see what I can do with this. Here goes my list of sorts to choose from.

First on the list would be the True Longinus, which is the strongest Base Sacred Gear, but it's also one of the more limited ones… right? I hope I was just talking out of my bum with that one. Based on my reading of this through the High School DxD Wiki, the True Longinus didn't even have that many forms that I could take on compared to something like Boosted Gear, which would suck if the info was false.

Then again, my knowledge came from the Wiki, which is equally pathetic. I don't know if I'd even develop the True Longinus to where Cao Cao did, to be fair… wait. Now that I think about it…

[No, I do not expect you to replace the person who you have the normal Sacred Gear of. All of that is up to you.]

Gee, no pressure, right?

Okay, where was I? Oh, right. True Longinus is a Sacred Gear that could easily destroy the world if I'm not careful. Would I need to do that? I hope not.

Next on the list of Longinus-class Sacred Gears was Zenith Tempest, which is a weather and elemental-manipulation Sacred Gear. I could see a lot of potential uses for this one, come to think of it, especially if I was as good at using it as Dulio was. Who wouldn't want to produce the right amount of rain for a bunch of crops on a farm?

Then again, there were also the combat applications that I needed to keep in mind, like how Dulio had it. All the Sacred Gears needed their combat applications kept in mind.

So, with that in mind, I had to be certain about what I was going to deal with. What I meant was that all I needed to do included training my Longinus to ridiculous standards, if I ever woke the Sacred Gear up appropriately. I hope it's possible.

Next on the list of Gears… the one Sacred Gear that lets a user make anything and everything in the mortal coil that could move and act on its own? I think that would explain Annihilation Maker.

After that, and also on the top tier list, was Dimension Lost. This Sacred Gear could make mists that could block attacks and teleport people to just about anywhere. While I never studied the Wiki for the information needed, I got the general gist of what was mentioned in the source material from it, so there's that.

Next up would be Hyoudou Issei's Sacred Gear, the Boosted Gear. I was leaning towards this option, for a good reason, in fact. I never lacked the needed info on this Longinus-class gear, even if it was a mid-tier, and somehow in the upper mid-tier at that. What was I supposed to say otherwise?

As far as the power that Boosted Gear offered, it offered me a boost of double my power at every flat amount of time, namely 10 seconds of time, for as long as my stamina held up. That was its base power… with all the good stuff happening while I was to train for Balance Breaker, which would be rather good for me. What do I mean? Well… other than what I mentioned about doubling my strength so long as I had the stamina to do it every ten seconds, I could easily turn into a flying suit of armor that would allow me to do a lot of things the way Ddraig would like it.

Anyway, let's just say that there's more to Boosted Gear than that, all by a long shot. What I meant was that my ability to fight with Boosted Gear would be one of the more developed abilities when I got myself ready to fight. However, I also needed to be careful not to be on Vali's shit list, all things considered. This is going to suck.

Next on the list is Divine Dividing, the powerful Longinus-class Sacred Gear that ranked underneath Boosted Gear in the list because of its more limited functionality. It divided a person's strength and gave the power to the user of this Sacred Gear, but the user of it had to physically touch the person who needed the division. Then again, last I checked, it gave wings to the possessor, which would make things a lot more interesting as a whole.

Then there's the next Sacred Gear in the Longinus-class on the list. Honestly, I never thought that the Regulus Nemea would be this interesting, especially since it went without a possessor that housed it within their soul in canon for a while. Sairaorg Bael was lucky to find this guy. Still… what was I supposed to say about this giant battleaxe that I knew next to nothing about? What little I knew was that it could split the earth in one swing and protect its wielders from projectiles.

Meh… I'll figure something out.

Next on this list is Canis Lykaon, the Longinus of Ikuse Tobio. It was an independent avatar-type, and had some extra abilities, like being able to turn into a sword if the possessor needs it. It can even turn its entire body into blades, and even make sneak attacks through the shadows.

Hmm… useful for assassination, I'll give it that, but not my cup of tea at all.

Next on the list was the Sephiroth Graal. Hoo, boy… where do I start with this?

Maybe I should start with the beginning, yeah?

On top of the normal issues that came with it being considered a Holy Relic, which included the ability to find specific seals in place to keep the world safe, the Sephiroth Graal was stated as having the ability to understand how the soul was made. Other than that, the Sephiroth Graal could heal people in a lesser manner than Twilight Healing, meaning not as instantaneous in speed. The Sephiroth Graal can also heal people in a less-traditional manner than just of their injuries… meaning, if used properly, it can even bring the dead back to life! More than that, it enables regeneration and soul manipulation, which really makes it a hardy bad boy.

Up next was Incinerate Anthem… what did I do to deserve this as a choice? It was literally the cross that Christ Jesus was crucified and hung from… even if the actual wood had to be a tree, considering wood in Palestine at the time was a rarity. Generating enough flames to incinerate and all that stuff… wait, hold up, forgot something. It is supposed to incinerate Devils with purple flames. It even had a will of its own… a point in favor of not using it, since that will could allow it to leave me behind, so it would seem.

Next on this list of Longinus Gears was Absolute Demise, a three meter tall ice statue that could generate a lot of ice in its base state. In its Balance Breaker, it could create a blizzard that could differentiate between friend and foe, though I'm not sure how likely that would be to work out. Still, I'm not sure if the statue was supposed to always be a woman when formed in the open… maybe?

Anyway, the next thing to note is the Longinus-style Sacred Gear called Innovate Clear, which would be what you get when you pair Annihilation Maker and Dimension Lost together and they make a child. If you were to make a bunch of species that would live in a pocket universe and only a pocket universe? That would be the situation in which Innovate Clear is good for.

Finally, we get to the end of the list, AKA Telos Karma. This Sacred Gear of the Longinus style can control probabilities better than most can expect. As a matter of fact —

[I hate to break it to you, but your memory is pretty fuzzy with the length of the list.]

Wait, what?!

Oh, crap… this is bad, isn't it? What am I supposed to remember about the list?!

[Maybe I should spell it out for you.]

Er… yeah, good idea, system.

[Thank you. Beginning knowledge transfer of the remaining five Longinus style Sacred Gears from later on in the series.]

Wait… what do you mean by a brain—OWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

[You're welcome.]

Not like I was going to thank you for this… ugh.

Okay, where was I? Oh, yeah… Telos Karma. Man, that Sacred Gear was broken as all get out, and I'd be an idiot to be on the wrong side of it.

Then again, the other five that came into the picture starting in True were probably just as broken as their older siblings from the original 13, if not more so.

Take Nereid Kyrie, for example. It can strengthen and control dragons and the sea. That'd be a rather impressive Sacred Gear to have if I wanted to get Hyoudou Issei put on a leash any time his antics get to be too much.

Then there's Star Buster Star Blaster. That Sacred Gear actually has no right being a good Sacred Gear, since it's a combo of a longsword and a rifle… though I would like to dual-wield, it needs to make sense to me for it to work. Abilities aside, though, it fits with the situation of Ishibumi not knowing what he's gotten himself into occasionally.

Next on the list made Gasper Vladi a literal deity of time and space… much as I wish it weren't the case. It was Forbidden Balor View as upgraded to be a Longinus. In short, Aeon Balor was a mega powerful time stopper, one that worked best with the shadows of anyone and anything. This would even get to the point for it to have two known Balance Breakers in its entirety… and we still don't know what makes it possible for Gasper to be a deity with this Sacred Gear!

Now, here we get to the last two Sacred Gears that made it to Longinus by the events of what could be the end of the series. Alphecca Tyrant and Unknown Dictator.

Alphecca Tyrant is a Longinus that was based around the idea of firing nails of holy energy to brainwash people, though it was initially limited to humans before it became a Longinus. As soon as it became a Longinus, however, it could control the very fabric of what makes a person who they are. What would I do with such a thing?

Finally, we have the final Sacred Gear of the Longinus category, called the Unknown Dictator. Unknown Dictator was a relatively new kind of Sacred Gear, since most of the others were made long ago, but this one could play the part of controlling the metal in a place. In fact, it could control electronics as well. The known user of the Longinus Unknown Dictator could control the electronics of an entire city, even!

Well… I might exaggerate, but the point still stands. Both Longinus Gears were dangerous in the right hands. Forget about the wrong ones, people.

Now, which of these 18 am I going to use? I wonder… would the system remove those that don't seem to fit me as a person?

[No, sorry, because of rules put in place…]

Good point. I needed to up my A-game, to put it plainly. Wait, hold up… what rules, exactly?

[Not allowed to talk about the rules yet. You still need to accept one of the Sacred Gears as your main Gear.]

Well… that's that. Now to make my decision… wait, what about how to make a bunch of choices matter in terms of potential readers? Would that make a difference?

[Okay, now you're just breaking the fourth wall, young man. Don't do it.]

Ugh… well, I guess it really was up to me to decide what the best choice would be, if only to keep the system happy. What do I do now?

Well, it took a few moments, but I decided on the choice that I needed to make. My ultimate choice for Sacred Gear of the Longinus category was Telos Karma. After making my choice, I knew I had a lot that I had to do to make sure that nobody would take my rights away as far as the selection of the sheets that I needed to find and keep track of. Of course, the key question was, how do I make the most of my time as a person in this world?

[Good. You have chosen your second Sacred Gear. Now, please tell me a bit more about your future lodgings, to make sure you have a good time in the future.]

Wait… what? This is new to me. Why did I need to tell the system this information?

[If you don't, you'll be given the metaphorical boot into the void, and you don't want that.]

You mean I would die for real outside of wherever I am? I mean, was I not born into this world a second time?

[Not yet… you haven't been born at the time you were supposed to, but it will happen shortly.]

Is this because I'm still in my mother's womb, by any chance?

[Yes.]

Ugh… this is ridiculous. What did I do to deserve this?

[Please tell me about where you would like to begin your story, and where you want to see the curtains rise on the beginning portion of the story.]

Okay, let's see what I can say here… for the beginning of my story of life, the truth is to be that I was born in a hospital near an American army base in Japan… which threw me for a loop. Why would I want to be there as a newborn? Hold up, what was Dad in the army still for?

Now, for the curtains to rise on the beginning portions of the story, I had a mix of American and Japanese education to flow within me, giving me a chance to practice my English and my Japanese in equal measure. The story starts as I transfer into Kuoh Academy for the second half of my first year in.

Now… what else is going to take place? Anything that I should know?

[No, not until later on down the road, at least in terms of choices made. Get ready to enjoy your time alive again soon.]

Gee, thanks…

Soon enough, I was pushed out of my mother's womb, which was… honestly? I think my visit from the System Interface was in the month leading up to my birth. I know that my meeting took place while I was almost ready to be a full baby, and one that wasn't premature, either. This… would be good to experience properly.

"Congratulations, it's a boy," the doctor that helped deliver me said. "What are you going to name him?"

I kept up appearances, of course, with me doing the whole crying upon birth schtick, but what else was there to learn? I didn't want to be blind-sided on this one. What would my name even —

"Shirou," my mom said. "Shounin Shirou."

Wait… did I get reincarnated into the Nasuverse?! Or am I mistaken this time?

[Actually, no, this is not the Nasuverse, especially not as elaborated on by Nasu Kinoko. It's primarily not anywhere near a thing in this case.]

Somehow, that wording worries me. What next, anyway?

I had turned my attention to a nearby doctor who was delivering a baby from what looked like—wait, hold up, is that Hyoudou Miki and her husband Goro?!

"Congratulations, it's a girl," Miki and Goro's doctor said to them, nearly causing me to bug my eyes out were it not because I'm a baby right now. What did that mean for Issei?! "What are you going to name her?"

"Her name will be Iruka," Goro said, after a few moments to think about it. "Originally, if she were a boy, she would have been named Issei, with the meaning being Honest Son."

Well… shit. This will not end well for the plot, will it? What am I supposed to do now?! Do everything to be in the place of Issei in that regard?

What did I do to deserve this, again?

A/N: Okay, this is a new story, as in it is new for this platform. I got the idea based on some random Reddit comments, which were based around a new Gacha game that came out in Japan. In fact, the name of the story is based on the primary activity of that Gacha game.

No, I don't know where the translations for that game are, and I don't frankly care to go looking for the illegal game translations. However, I like the designs of the girls in the game, Dolphin Wave. In fact, that's where the idea for female Issei came from, since Iruka looks like what I picture a female Hyoudou Issei would look like (except for the hair and eyes, but that's going to be explained later).

Until next time, which will be when I get the votes wrapped up over on QQ for the next chapter, guys. No, seriously, I hope to see you again when the next chapter is fully voted through.

Until we meet again... farewell.
~Xamusel