Authors note: I don't own HP. I just like making fan fictions. J Thank you to all my readers, I believe I e-mailed all of you. If anyone wants me to review their story just drop an e-mail or something. With your username, title or link.
There was a deafening silence as Draco sat back on an overstuffed burgundy chair, crossed his arms smugly and smirked. Draco mentally put a post it note in his brain, that he was a complete genius.
"So, how is setting some one else up going to take the spot light off of Harry?" Granger asked, completely befuddled.
"Stupid mud blood, for someone with top marks, I wonder if you carry your brain in your pocket," Draco rolled his eyes, how idiotic muggle borns are. "Some great new thing will attract the attention of others…"
"I don't get it." Ron said plainly.
Draco tossed a shiny golden coin at Ron. "Weasel, go buy yourself some brains."
Ron happily pocketed the coin in his hand-me-down robes and mentally made a note that he would buy something at Zonko's. at a later time.
"C'mon Herm, Ron." Harry said, walking towards the door silently. "We'll think about this, Malfoy. And then maybe we'll consider the idea. I'm not usually so keen on to going with a bouncing constipated ferret's ideas."
"In other words," Draco said, blinking rapidly. "You have to explain the plan to those idiots?"
Harry nodded grimly, as Ron and Hermione smiled politely. They were really quite stupid, but not so much as his cronies Crabbe and Goyle, so there really wasn't much to say.
--
Draco sat in his prefects room, throwing a stolen snitch up in the air. All day, he had been ridiculed by his peers. They even got a poster of Harry and himself holding hands and close enough to kiss.
"Please," Draco thought silently. "I wouldn't even want to bump into that Potter."
There was a light knock on the door.
"Will you just give up already, Pansy." He sighed. "I don't want to snog right now."
"Mr. Malfoy," came a drawling voice, slightly muffled, but it was clearly Snape. "Care to open the door?"
Draco walked over to the small door and unlocked it, upon doing so, he turned around and sat back in a chair.
Snape walked through the door in those familiar black, sweeping robes and posed. He rested his hands on his hips, smiled, turned, frowned, scowled, sneered, and then smiled once more. Draco was quite familiar with the routine, Snape would do it every potions class.
Professor Snape was Draco's favorite teacher, but sometimes he was just too much.
"There is someone here to see you, Mr. Malfoy."
"Who is it.." Draco asked, still tossing the golden orb in the air.
"It's is Ms. Skeeter. Ms. Rochelle Skeeter."
Draco got up from his seat as Snape motioned him to follow. Outside of the Slytherin Common room, there stood Ms. Skeeter. She looked almost identical to Rita, with horned glasses and pouty, smug looking lips.
"Mr. Malfoy, nice of you to meet me on short notice," She purred, extending a hand with long, claw like nails.
"Sure, sure," Draco said, ignoring the hand.
Draco took a seat on a couch and looked up, quirking his ever so infamous eyebrow.
"Do you mind me asking a few questions?" Rochelle asked, combing through her hair with her hand.
"Fine…Quickly," Draco sighed, he needed to get back to a potions essay that was due 15 point something weeks ago.
Rochelle reached into her snake skin handbag and pulled out some parchment and a familiar looking quill. Instead of it being acid green, it was in fact, shockingly purple. She set the parchment on her lap and rested the quill on top of it. As soon as she spoke, the quill sprang into life and began to write in loopy, curvy, handwriting.
"How's your 6th year at Hogwarts going?"
"Fine, just fine." Draco said, smoothing a crease in his robes.
"And your professors, are they fine as well?"
"Yes, of course." Draco said impatiently.
"And the Harry Potter fellow," Rochelle said quickly. "How is he doing?"
"He's doing just fine." Draco said crossly. "Just fine."
"And I hear from a fellow Slytherin girl that yourself and Mr. Potter are currently in a relationship?"
"NO. Maybe you should go ahead and leave…" Draco practically jumped up from his chair. "I think that's enough questions, don't you?"
"Wait-- Just one more. Does Professor Snape really not wash his hair at night?"
"I wouldn't know," Draco said snidely. "Maybe he does it in the morning.."
Rochelle Skeeter rose from her end of the couch and put her quill away. Draco, turned around and saw her reading over her article, which had something bold and curvy written on top. Lovers Column.
Groaning, he quickly walked back into his room, praying that Rochelle Skeeter wasn't as bad as Rita herself.
--
The next morning, Draco sat at the Slytherins table in the Great Hall. He was sitting in the far corner again, and even Crabbe And Goyle were a bit afraid that he was going to come onto to them. Blaise had practically jumped happily at the idea of Draco being homosexual, since she was a bit crooked herself. He stabbed his fork into a bit of eggs and imagined the faces to be Potter and his friends. Stab. Stab. Stab.
A great screech was heard as a smug looking owl flew down to Pansy's side.
"Aw, Fluffy. Thanks for the news," Pansy adjusted the ribbon around Fluffy's neck while grabbing the newspaper, which was tangled around on her leg.
After a period of 10 minutes, she pulled it out and let Fluffy to go.
"The Love Column, Ooh. Rochelle is a bloody genius." She whispered, frantically looking for the article on gossip and love.
Draco's eyes widened with a start, as he reached for the paper. The table across from him, he could see Mudblood and TheBoyWhoWon'tDIE reading the same paper, slowly. Sucking in a huge breath, he snatched the paper from Pansy's hands, something that left her squealing about him being a homosexual or other.
Quickly, he ran to his room, leaving his half eaten breakfast behind.
THE LOVE COLUMN
By Rochelle Skeeter, cousin of Rita Skeeter, a most famous reporter.
Things are going very smoothly at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. In fact, things may be going even more smoothly for two very, handsome young boys. Draco Malfoy, 6th year student and Harry Potter, 6th year student are rumored to being in a romantic, classic relationship. But it seems that a few very ugly things have reared it's head in this interview.
"Mr. Malfoy, What do you think about Harry Potter, the boy who lived, the defeater of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, the golden wonder boy and one with shockingly green eyes?"
"Fine, just fine." Young Malfoy said, a small blush creeping over his face.
"And your professors (Such as Professor Snape, Professor McGonagall), are they fine as well?"
"Yes, of course." Young Malfoy said, blushing even further, he began to twiddle with his robes nervously as if not wanting something to be known.
"And Harry Potter, I'm sure he is strikingly handsome. Being a homosexual man yourself, what do you think of him?"
"FINE," Yong Malfoy said, smiling, chest swelling with proud. "Just fine."
"And is it true that you are currently seeing Professor Snape as one of your candidates if your relationship with Mr. Potter dies out? I hear he is quite the mathematical man.."
"NO. Maybe.." Draco said, his eyes filling with painful tears. He gave a weak smile, changing the subject. But his trembling hands were seen to the most plain eyes. "I think that's enough questions, don't you?"
"One last question, if you please. Mr. Malfoy. Is it true that you wash Professor Snape's hair in your quarters?"
Draco's eyes slid into a small, sad position. "Does it in the morning.."
It seems that Hogwarts' student's love lives are running down a bumpy road. Good luck to Mr. Potter, Mr. Malfoy and Professor Snape. Since all male, I trust that you will not produce any young.
Below the article was a picture of Harry and Draco, holding hands and sipping bubbling champagne. Hearts were floating out of their eyes, and the familiar shadow of Snape was lurking in the background. Draco wondered how they got that picture when it never even happened, or better yet..Who made it.
Draco's eyes glazed over as he crumpled up the paper.
There was a sharp rap on the door.
"OPEN UP, MALFOY. WE KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE."