Disclaimer: I am in no way connected to Dawson's Creek and no copyright infringement is intended.
Notes: This is a D/J fic set after the final episode with the alternating POV's of Joey, Pacey, and Dawson
Rating: R for language and some sexual situations.
Body and Soul
Chapter Five
Pacey
It's a been a slow and a long day and Joey hasn't called. I stayed with her until she went to the gate. I sent her off with a kiss, I sent her to him. It's back. The jealousy. It comes so easily when I think of the two of them together. Call, please. I feel pathetic, the way I did senior year when things were going to shit between us. The love was there but I had nothing to offer her, nothing that she needed anyway. She didn't need a hero or a night in shining armor. Our lives were going in two separate directions; Joey was college bound and I was bound for anything that paid five fifteen an hour.
I keep trying to tell myself that things have changed but when I look closer, and I hate to look closer, things are exactly the same as they were back then. Our lives are headed in completely different directions. Joey is in New York and has the whole world at her feet. My prospects are good too, but they're a different sort of prospects. Where I'm at now is about as high as I will climb in the world. Honestly, it's about as high as I want to climb. It's a good place for me to be but I know that it's not for her. So I'll give it all up. I'll go to New York or wherever and be what she wants. Not what she wants for me, what she wants for herself. I'll be upwardly mobile, I'll be educated, and I'll be slightly pretentious. I'll be all those things because that is what she is, where she's going. I love her so much it physically hurts sometimes and I can't let her go those places alone, or worse with Dawson.
"Hi." A long limbed redhead sits down at the end of the bar. What a hot little number like that is doing alone here at eleven at night is beyond me. Probably waiting for her boyfriend.
"What can I get for you?" I check her out but I know she knows that I'm doing it by the small smirk that invades her lips.
"Hmm," I think that she may be deliberately nibbling on the edge of her lip in an effort to drive me crazy. "I don't know. Whatever you want to make me." Now I know she's flirting.
"Sex On the Beach?" it's almost more of a suggestion than a drink.
"Sounds good."
I'm feeling very flirtatious. "I'll just have to see some ID."
""I was only two grades behind you." She hands me her license anyway. Actually a decent photo, Janice Seymour it says. "You don't remember, do you?" her voice is thick with mock hurt.
"Should I Janice?" I use her name on purpose and with emphasis. I hand her license back. I never did look at the date of birth, she could be seventeen for all I know.
"My friends and I only made an extra circular activity out of following you around."
"Did we have sociology together?" I think I might remember her. Add braces and take away the breasts and I think I've got it. "You used to let me copy your homework."
"And you never looked at me twice. You were pretty wrapped up in Joey Potter."
"Still am," I know that in the art of flirting it isn't always wise to mention your girlfriend but I can't help it.
"I thought you two broke up at prom?"
"We did. But just recently we got back together."
"So," she takes a sip from her drink. "Sammy and Petey found their way back to each other."
The part about living in Capeside that sucks is that the town is The Creek crazy. Understandable, I suppose, when local boy makes good and puts his hometown on the map. Even the Icehouse has a little sign in front reading Real life inspiration for The IceBox of The Creek'. The sign was Joey's idea but it does bring in business with the summer tourist crowd. The Potter B&B has a huge sign of the same essence with gilded lettering at the entrance. Most people in Capeside know that Dawson based his show on real life and it was pretty easy for the town to figure out who was who on the show. What's even worse than people thinking they know the intimate details of your life are the people who think they were a part of it, of what we had. A few have come in here acting like they were just one of the gang, as if they watched movies in Dawson's bedroom or shared a table with us in the cafeteria. Nellie Olson, Warren, Belinda and countless others have come in here friendly as hell talking about the good old days with Dawson and the gang. They wouldn't give us the time of day in high school and suddenly they're my best friend and always did have a crush on Joey.
"Joey and Pacey found their way back to each other." I don't want to get drawn into a conversation about The Creek and I hope that she won't ask me who has sex on next week's episode. How the hell should I know? He won't even tell Joey.
I can tell that she's not sure what to say now. Not only have I made it obvious that I have a girlfriend I've also made it pretty clear that I don't want to talk about the show. So we just watch the television for a while.
Fuck. There's no escaping it. That damn commercial has been on about a hundred times in the past two days. I hear the intro music for it. One of these couples,' the announcer starts, and there's a clip of Kim and John with him doubting his sexuality, a clip of Lexi and Petey saying they hate each other before passionately kissing, and a clip of Colby and Sam in bed with Colby saying our first time in a foreign bed'. Then we see a barrage of clips as the music quickens. Will take their relationship to the next level. Find out next Wednesday on The Creek'. I don't care if Janice is watching this or not I change the channel.
"My friend is here," she gestures to a petite blond that just came in. "I have to go. What do I owe you?"
"On the house."
"Here," she pushes a napkin with her number on it across the bar. I don't let her see me throw it away. I'm a flirt not a cheater. Her dad was a cheater I could never do that to her.
Dawson
I look at Joey again searching for clues to what she's feeling. There was a time that I could read those eyes better than my own. There was a time that she was mine. But even though she's not my girlfriend, she's still my soulmate and I can sense apprehension and something else. Fear, maybe?
"You alright?" I've asked her this before but I have to ask again.
"Yeah, just a little nervous. It's not everyday that little Joey Potter goes to a movie premier."
"You're not little anymore." I can't help but look her up and down appreciatively when I say that. My mother was right, a beautiful woman can't go wrong in a black dress.
"I guess I'm not." She blushes a little bit and it may be one of the most endearing things I've ever seen.
"You'll be great. All we have to do is walk down the carpet. Depending upon who else is around I may have to answer a few questions if they can't find anyone more famous, then we just go watch the movie. Then of course there's the party afterward." Joey is so strong it's nice to be in a position to let her lean on me a little.
"But we're here already why do we have to wait in the car for so long?"
"They like to pace everyone so it's not a bum rush. This way the fans can see everyone and the photographers get good pictures."
"They won't take our picture will they?" She seems to get more nervous at the thought.
"Doubtful. I'm just the face behind The Creek. If the actors were here the photographers would go crazy."
"At the airport today I saw Petey on the cover of one of those teen magazines. It was weird."
"Weird for them too. One minute they are struggling unknown actors and the next they are the new big thing. It's insane."
"How are they handling it? Sammy, or Julia, seemed to be pretty grounded."
"Well no one's in Betty Ford so by Hollywood standards we're doing pretty damn good." No one's there YET, I can't help but think to myself. But what do people expect when suddenly nineteen-year-old kids have the world at their feet. I remember when I was nineteen. There was no way I could have handled the pressure and scrutiny.
"We're on," I say to Joey as finally they open our car door. The escort helps Joey out first and I follow after. It's cute how her hand instantly finds mine. I give her hand a reassuring squeeze and begin to lead her down the red carpet.
This is strange because I can't begin to count the number of times I've fantasized about a moment like this. A movie premier, the red carpet, an almost painfully beautiful Joey on my arm. It's as real as anything can be that's an illusion. It's not my movie and not my girlfriend. Not that I'm complaining, I'm more than happy to just live this moment. I want to remember every detail. How thin the straps on Joey's dress are, how unusually warm it is for November, and how my heart is beating faster than it has in long time.
Joey
As we walk down the red carpet I can't believe that I'm actually walking down the red carpet. Actually it seems to be more of a corral for the rich and famous as photographers and reporters try to rope them in. David! Rena!' they call out fervently. Over here!' they demand.
I'm trying to remember every detail because I know that Bessie will grill me about this over and over for years to come but all I can seem to comprehend is the way that Dawson's hand feels in mine. It's as smooth as it ever was but larger, more manly. I try to make note of all the famous people that I recognize. There are a few but no one really big.
"Dawson Leery!" a lady with a microphone shouts. "Over here!" As Dawson leads me over to her I can't quite process that someone wants an interview. I just follow him.
"Can you tell us who will get together next week on The Creek?" I've heard people ask him this question at least twenty times today, even I'm sick of it.
"I can tell you that it will be either Kim and John, Petey and Lexi, or Sammy and Colby." He answers it the same way every time, even when I asked.
"Well I for one can hardly wait for Wednesday night." She answers with a smile but I can tell it wasn't what she wanted to hear. "Who's your escort for the evening?" She tries a different line of questioning and turns to me. I would be lying if I said this question didn't freak me out. I don't want to have any attention focused on me. Dawson must notice this because he puts his arm around my waist and rests his hand on my hip. Thankful for the support I lean into him.
"Joey Potter," thankfully Dawson answers for me.
"The real life inspiration for Sammy Gardner?" she becomes more interested in me.
"Yes," Dawson answers simply.
"Is it a love connection?" I can see her actually checking my finger for a wedding or engagement ring.
"Best friends," he looks down at me and smiles.
"Soulmates," I'm not sure why I feel the need to clarify but I do. I look up at him. "Always." The word is meant for Dawson alone, not this pushy woman with an oversized microphone.
"Thanks," Dawson tries to wrap up the interview. I don't have to look to see that he is offering me his hand. Gratefully I take it and let him lead me away.
Pacey
Janice and her friend as well as most of the customers are gone now so I've decided to close the bar out early. Thursday nights are never that big. Joey's convinced me to show The Creek on the television and turn it into a sort of sweeps party. That should help business. It was a better idea before I knew she was going to be out of town. But Doug and Jack will be here for sure and probably Gale so it shouldn't be so bad.
"Dawson Leery! Over here!" The voice from the television makes me lose count of the till. It's that obnoxious reporter from Entertainment television. I can't believe what I see. It's Joey and Dawson at some event thing. Well I guess she won't be calling.
I think I might actually be sick. Jo's there at his side holding his hand. It looks like they're together and not in a best friends kind of way. I've been so struck by the fact that now Dawson has his hand on my girlfriend's hip that I haven't even been listening to what they are saying.
I have to actually concentrate on listening. "Joey Potter," Dawson says. Joey can speak for herself.
"The real life inspiration for Sammy Gardner?" Why don't you tell the whole damn world that my girlfriend is still his obsession?
"Yes." I hate the way that he doesn't continue. I'm not sure why I don't like it. It's tooconfident.
"Is it a love connection?" God, now I am going to be sick.
"Best friends," Dawson answers looking down at her almost as if he's going to kiss her. Please God don't have him kiss her.
"Soulmates." Why did she have to say that and look up at him with the moon in hers eyes? "Always." I feel like I've intruded upon a private moment between lovers. As I see her blindly reach for his hand, confident in the fact that it will be there, I feel as if I've already lost her.