* * *
"Bye!"
"Bye Bye!"
"Bye Mr. Piccolo!"
"Bye you two"
"Goodbye."
"Bye" Piccolo said pushing the door shut, he bumped his head against it "That was hell" he informed his new room mate.
"I don't like your friends"
"I don't like you" sneered Piccolo.
"Fair Enough, I could destroy you in an instant"
"Ha" Piccolo laughed sorely, "Cute".
"Well I am cute" Juu winked, "Nani Tabeyo-ka?" (What should we eat?)
"Nanini shiyou kana" (hmm.lemme think) Piccolo walked into the fully- stocked kitchen and moved his eyes around it's interior, "I can't cook" he informed Juu loudly, "We'll have to order out.I guess.".
"Hey, we're not made of money! We've got plenty of food to cook it'd been a waste to order take out-I can cook fine" Juu entered the kitchen, arms crossed firmly on his chest "Now-get out the vegetable oil-fried noodles, and a frying pan. I'm cooking us Yakisoba".
Piccolo arched a brow, "Isn't that a little un-healthy?".
"We're men! Bachelors! Or-atleast I'm a man. We can eat how ever the damn we please!" Juu grinned.
"I could dry up"
"Well then you lived a good life, now get out those ingredients I'm making dinner!" Juu rubbed his hands together in anticipation, Piccolo gave him a puzzled look "Now" Juu said squinting at him. Piccolo still remained planted to his spot, gazing at Juu in confusion.
Juu rolled his eyes and walked forward, he raised his hand at Piccolo's backside and smacked his butt, "Off with you".
"Fuzaken jyane--yo nande sonna koto shitan dayo-?!?!" cried Piccolo running forward, "Koro shite yaru-!".
Juu waved his hand, "Go on".
Piccolo opened a cupboard and slowly took out the oil, watching Juu out of the corner of his eyes daring him to try that again, his cheeks burning purple. Juu smiled devilishly, "You've got a nice butt".
Piccolo fired up an energy blast, "YOU FRUIT" he spat, looking scared.
"Quite the opposite, Green. Infact if your interested, College Boy. I've got a date on Saturday and her friend is coming with her so why don't you join us?"
"Can't" Piccolo replied stiffly, "And Won't."
"Can't? You have plans?" Juu raised an eyebrow eloquently, "Do Tell".
"I've got to get a Drivers License Saturday and shop-" Piccolo blushed a bit, "Bulma said I'm starting classes on Monday and I don't think I'll be able to wear my training Gi".
"It's to my understanding.that you can't just go to law school right?" Juu asked setting the frying pan on the stove, "You have to go to College and get your bachelors' right?".
Piccolo nodded, "I'm going to get a bachelors' in psychology and then I'm going to law school".
Juu stroked his chin, starring at Piccolo thoughtfully, "Well now, you've got everything figured out don't you? When does a girl or 10 fit into this plan?".
"What?" grunted Piccolo.
"A woman to satisfy your manly needs"
"You're a pig" growled Piccolo, "I don't want a woman, I'm a Namek, we don't need companionship".
"But Namekian's are men right?"
"Yea.but we just die and spit out eggs, all the Namekian women died out ages ago" Piccolo sighed lightly, "I don't think a Namekian man has been with a woman for decades".
"Man.that's hell" Juu hoisted himself on the counter top and crossed his legs "So you don't like chicks?".
"I wouldn't know, I've only met 10 in my lifetime and they've either been taken or don't interest me" Piccolo looked out the noodles and handed them to Juu.
"So I can count you in for that double date then?" asked Juu slowly.
"I said 'No'" he said loudly.
"SO what time should we pick them up?"
"What are you death?" spat Piccolo squinting at him, "I said NO".
"What will you wear?".
"Kami! Just make the dinner already!" shouted Piccolo.
"Sure Handsome" Juu winked, and went to work.
* * *
Piccolo wiped his mouth, eyeing Juu suspiciously as he had just finished the meal.
Juu smirked, "Like it?".
"It's okay, but I'll make dinner tomorrow night" Piccolo replied slowly, "We'll take shifts".
"I take Sunday" Juu said quickly.
"I take Monday"
"I take Tuesday"
"I take Wednesday!"
"But I want Wednesday"
"I get Wednesday!"
"Fine, I get Thursday"
"Friday and Saturday we eat out, with women most likely"
Piccolo blinked, "Can we afford that?".
"Bulma can"
"We should only use her money when we need too! We should do-or you should use the rest of your paycheck for that other stuff" Piccolo said stiffly, "Besides, shouldn't you be busy working?"
"Uh no." Juu said dully.
"I'm going to bed." Piccolo said wandering off into his room.
***
Piccolo awoke next morning to a strange smell. He got up and put his gi top making his way out of his room. Juunana-gou was making breakfast in the kitchen humming some strange tune.
"What are you doing?" Piccolo asked with a strange look on his face
"Making breakfast." Juu said giving a wink
"teme-yarukika!?(are you trying to piss me off!?)" Piccolo barked.
"Course not."
"I'm gonna go now" Piccolo said backing away towards the door
"But what about Breakfast?" Juu asked pouting his lip.
"SCREW BREAKFAST!" Piccolo yelled running for the door.
"When will you be back!?" Juu yelled after him as the door slammed.
"nanda aitsu(what da hell is wrong with him?)" Piccolo said panting.
Piccolo ran down stairs looking at the parking lot below. He passed his car that Bulma had parked for him, if only he could drive. It took quite sometime before piccolo finally made it to the mall. He had started to wish he had ate some of that breakfast after hearing his stomach growl for the umpteenth time. He proceeded through the entrance doors.
The mall was near-empty as few people went that early in the morning, shops were just opening so it looked like he wouldn't catch the eye of too many people at once.
He almost felt awkward in his training GI, it wasn't very casual.
He frowned inwardly, shopping for 'casual' clothes would be a battle.
"Hey Piccolo!" came a familiar voice from behind.
Piccolo turned around and grinned at Yamucha and the girl hanging off his arm, "Hey Yamucha".
"Your shopping?" asked Yamucha, grinning back at him "I'd never think I'd see the day".
"Yes well.I'm a College man" Piccolo said, giving him a week thumbs up.
"You?" snorted Yamucha.
Piccolo glared.
Yamucha looked as if he was going to wet himself, "No-I mean what I meant was-I just-didn't-expect you to go to college but I guess you've got to get a human life right? I mean the earth is threat-less and the whole saving the earth thing isn't happening. So-what're you going to be?" he asked smiling nervously.
"I'm going to get my bachelors in psychology and then I'm going to law school" Piccolo replied with a dignant nod of the head.
"Law school?" laughed Yamucha.
The girl on his arm smacked him upside the head, then looked to Piccolo "I think that is so inspiring, I mean you getting on with your life" she squeaked in a perky voice.
Piccolo tilted his chin up and turned on his heel walking to the escalator.
He starred at it.
And he starred at it some more.
Was he suppose to step on it?
Hesitantly he stepped onto the last moving step, he let out a loud grunt as he quickly placed his other foot on it as it moved up. He could hear Yamucha's howls of laughter echoing off the glass ceiling. What a sight he was, a green man afraid to ride a staircase.
This was going to be one hell of a day.
* * *
Piccolo had finally managed to make it up the stairs, by that time the mall had filled with more people. He wasn't surprised, I mean, It did take him about an hour to go up the stairs until he realized he left his wallet back on the first floor. Going down the down escalator was about ten times more frightening for the poor country Namek. He kept on questioning weather gravity would decide to play a game of cat and mouse. Surprisingly enough it did. He tripped, tumbling down the stairs in a violent rage, only to get his antennas caught. Not to mention a little boy with red hair with a pixie stix started to poke him and say "Mommy can we keep him?" This was not going well.
Piccolo, now at the second floor, found that shopping was even harder.
"Um, lets see here." Piccolo mumbled staring down at a list that Juu had written for him explaining what items would be necessary. He raised an eyebrow at the words 'play boy magazine'.
"I better check with Bulma on that one." Piccolo said circling the word with a red pen.
"Excuse me sir would you be interested in trying this new line of cologne! ^_^ It's free!" A sales lady yelled making piccolo jump up, knocking down a couple of notebooks he was looking at.
"Um, no thank you." Piccolo said awkwardly, backing into a corner.
"Oh but I Insist!" The woman said now with a more aggressive tone of voice.
"No really, I don't want any!" Piccolo yelled, struggling to find a way out.
"ooh but you must!" She said now with her and on the top of it, preparing to squirt.
"Um..I" piccolo said nervously "Don't like that kind. Why don't you get some erm.other varieties."
"OOH! Splendid! excellent idea sir!" She said clapping her hands together. "I'll go get some more from my stock, and don't you go anywhere." She said winking.
"Uh.yeah sure." Piccolo looked both ways and forced a smile on his face.
The woman pounced of, giggling. She wouldn't be gone long so he had better get moving. Piccolo took a step to the left and looked around cautiously. "Ah who are you kidding. They can't do anything to you, they're just sales women." Piccolo assured himself. He proudly marched towards the exit, now feeling much more comfortable.
"I'm ba." The woman said trailing off. She looked around and notice a green head heading for the exit. "Oh no you don't!" She yelled as she pressed as she took out a walky talky and pressed in the red button. "He have a 123, male, 6.6ft, and bout 160 pounds. Oh yea and he's green. Close all exits." She spoke into the speaker. "Roger that," A woman's voice answered as the sales lady made way for the exit.
Piccolo's elf ears perked up and began to twitch madly. "I hear something." Piccolo said as he gave a look around. He squinted and saw a whole bunch of heads appearing over the aisles. "What?" Piccolo asked as he raised a brow. And then the exit suddenly closed. Piccolo jumped up and looked around only to find A STAMPEDE OF SALES LADIES!
"Get him!" One of them yelled, charging towards the helpless lima bean. He recognized one of them as the sales lady he left, god he wished he would've listened to his instincts. They grew closer and closer until.
SC: Yeah I know it's kinda a cliff hanger but that's fan fiction for ya.
CK:
"Bye!"
"Bye Bye!"
"Bye Mr. Piccolo!"
"Bye you two"
"Goodbye."
"Bye" Piccolo said pushing the door shut, he bumped his head against it "That was hell" he informed his new room mate.
"I don't like your friends"
"I don't like you" sneered Piccolo.
"Fair Enough, I could destroy you in an instant"
"Ha" Piccolo laughed sorely, "Cute".
"Well I am cute" Juu winked, "Nani Tabeyo-ka?" (What should we eat?)
"Nanini shiyou kana" (hmm.lemme think) Piccolo walked into the fully- stocked kitchen and moved his eyes around it's interior, "I can't cook" he informed Juu loudly, "We'll have to order out.I guess.".
"Hey, we're not made of money! We've got plenty of food to cook it'd been a waste to order take out-I can cook fine" Juu entered the kitchen, arms crossed firmly on his chest "Now-get out the vegetable oil-fried noodles, and a frying pan. I'm cooking us Yakisoba".
Piccolo arched a brow, "Isn't that a little un-healthy?".
"We're men! Bachelors! Or-atleast I'm a man. We can eat how ever the damn we please!" Juu grinned.
"I could dry up"
"Well then you lived a good life, now get out those ingredients I'm making dinner!" Juu rubbed his hands together in anticipation, Piccolo gave him a puzzled look "Now" Juu said squinting at him. Piccolo still remained planted to his spot, gazing at Juu in confusion.
Juu rolled his eyes and walked forward, he raised his hand at Piccolo's backside and smacked his butt, "Off with you".
"Fuzaken jyane--yo nande sonna koto shitan dayo-?!?!" cried Piccolo running forward, "Koro shite yaru-!".
Juu waved his hand, "Go on".
Piccolo opened a cupboard and slowly took out the oil, watching Juu out of the corner of his eyes daring him to try that again, his cheeks burning purple. Juu smiled devilishly, "You've got a nice butt".
Piccolo fired up an energy blast, "YOU FRUIT" he spat, looking scared.
"Quite the opposite, Green. Infact if your interested, College Boy. I've got a date on Saturday and her friend is coming with her so why don't you join us?"
"Can't" Piccolo replied stiffly, "And Won't."
"Can't? You have plans?" Juu raised an eyebrow eloquently, "Do Tell".
"I've got to get a Drivers License Saturday and shop-" Piccolo blushed a bit, "Bulma said I'm starting classes on Monday and I don't think I'll be able to wear my training Gi".
"It's to my understanding.that you can't just go to law school right?" Juu asked setting the frying pan on the stove, "You have to go to College and get your bachelors' right?".
Piccolo nodded, "I'm going to get a bachelors' in psychology and then I'm going to law school".
Juu stroked his chin, starring at Piccolo thoughtfully, "Well now, you've got everything figured out don't you? When does a girl or 10 fit into this plan?".
"What?" grunted Piccolo.
"A woman to satisfy your manly needs"
"You're a pig" growled Piccolo, "I don't want a woman, I'm a Namek, we don't need companionship".
"But Namekian's are men right?"
"Yea.but we just die and spit out eggs, all the Namekian women died out ages ago" Piccolo sighed lightly, "I don't think a Namekian man has been with a woman for decades".
"Man.that's hell" Juu hoisted himself on the counter top and crossed his legs "So you don't like chicks?".
"I wouldn't know, I've only met 10 in my lifetime and they've either been taken or don't interest me" Piccolo looked out the noodles and handed them to Juu.
"So I can count you in for that double date then?" asked Juu slowly.
"I said 'No'" he said loudly.
"SO what time should we pick them up?"
"What are you death?" spat Piccolo squinting at him, "I said NO".
"What will you wear?".
"Kami! Just make the dinner already!" shouted Piccolo.
"Sure Handsome" Juu winked, and went to work.
* * *
Piccolo wiped his mouth, eyeing Juu suspiciously as he had just finished the meal.
Juu smirked, "Like it?".
"It's okay, but I'll make dinner tomorrow night" Piccolo replied slowly, "We'll take shifts".
"I take Sunday" Juu said quickly.
"I take Monday"
"I take Tuesday"
"I take Wednesday!"
"But I want Wednesday"
"I get Wednesday!"
"Fine, I get Thursday"
"Friday and Saturday we eat out, with women most likely"
Piccolo blinked, "Can we afford that?".
"Bulma can"
"We should only use her money when we need too! We should do-or you should use the rest of your paycheck for that other stuff" Piccolo said stiffly, "Besides, shouldn't you be busy working?"
"Uh no." Juu said dully.
"I'm going to bed." Piccolo said wandering off into his room.
***
Piccolo awoke next morning to a strange smell. He got up and put his gi top making his way out of his room. Juunana-gou was making breakfast in the kitchen humming some strange tune.
"What are you doing?" Piccolo asked with a strange look on his face
"Making breakfast." Juu said giving a wink
"teme-yarukika!?(are you trying to piss me off!?)" Piccolo barked.
"Course not."
"I'm gonna go now" Piccolo said backing away towards the door
"But what about Breakfast?" Juu asked pouting his lip.
"SCREW BREAKFAST!" Piccolo yelled running for the door.
"When will you be back!?" Juu yelled after him as the door slammed.
"nanda aitsu(what da hell is wrong with him?)" Piccolo said panting.
Piccolo ran down stairs looking at the parking lot below. He passed his car that Bulma had parked for him, if only he could drive. It took quite sometime before piccolo finally made it to the mall. He had started to wish he had ate some of that breakfast after hearing his stomach growl for the umpteenth time. He proceeded through the entrance doors.
The mall was near-empty as few people went that early in the morning, shops were just opening so it looked like he wouldn't catch the eye of too many people at once.
He almost felt awkward in his training GI, it wasn't very casual.
He frowned inwardly, shopping for 'casual' clothes would be a battle.
"Hey Piccolo!" came a familiar voice from behind.
Piccolo turned around and grinned at Yamucha and the girl hanging off his arm, "Hey Yamucha".
"Your shopping?" asked Yamucha, grinning back at him "I'd never think I'd see the day".
"Yes well.I'm a College man" Piccolo said, giving him a week thumbs up.
"You?" snorted Yamucha.
Piccolo glared.
Yamucha looked as if he was going to wet himself, "No-I mean what I meant was-I just-didn't-expect you to go to college but I guess you've got to get a human life right? I mean the earth is threat-less and the whole saving the earth thing isn't happening. So-what're you going to be?" he asked smiling nervously.
"I'm going to get my bachelors in psychology and then I'm going to law school" Piccolo replied with a dignant nod of the head.
"Law school?" laughed Yamucha.
The girl on his arm smacked him upside the head, then looked to Piccolo "I think that is so inspiring, I mean you getting on with your life" she squeaked in a perky voice.
Piccolo tilted his chin up and turned on his heel walking to the escalator.
He starred at it.
And he starred at it some more.
Was he suppose to step on it?
Hesitantly he stepped onto the last moving step, he let out a loud grunt as he quickly placed his other foot on it as it moved up. He could hear Yamucha's howls of laughter echoing off the glass ceiling. What a sight he was, a green man afraid to ride a staircase.
This was going to be one hell of a day.
* * *
Piccolo had finally managed to make it up the stairs, by that time the mall had filled with more people. He wasn't surprised, I mean, It did take him about an hour to go up the stairs until he realized he left his wallet back on the first floor. Going down the down escalator was about ten times more frightening for the poor country Namek. He kept on questioning weather gravity would decide to play a game of cat and mouse. Surprisingly enough it did. He tripped, tumbling down the stairs in a violent rage, only to get his antennas caught. Not to mention a little boy with red hair with a pixie stix started to poke him and say "Mommy can we keep him?" This was not going well.
Piccolo, now at the second floor, found that shopping was even harder.
"Um, lets see here." Piccolo mumbled staring down at a list that Juu had written for him explaining what items would be necessary. He raised an eyebrow at the words 'play boy magazine'.
"I better check with Bulma on that one." Piccolo said circling the word with a red pen.
"Excuse me sir would you be interested in trying this new line of cologne! ^_^ It's free!" A sales lady yelled making piccolo jump up, knocking down a couple of notebooks he was looking at.
"Um, no thank you." Piccolo said awkwardly, backing into a corner.
"Oh but I Insist!" The woman said now with a more aggressive tone of voice.
"No really, I don't want any!" Piccolo yelled, struggling to find a way out.
"ooh but you must!" She said now with her and on the top of it, preparing to squirt.
"Um..I" piccolo said nervously "Don't like that kind. Why don't you get some erm.other varieties."
"OOH! Splendid! excellent idea sir!" She said clapping her hands together. "I'll go get some more from my stock, and don't you go anywhere." She said winking.
"Uh.yeah sure." Piccolo looked both ways and forced a smile on his face.
The woman pounced of, giggling. She wouldn't be gone long so he had better get moving. Piccolo took a step to the left and looked around cautiously. "Ah who are you kidding. They can't do anything to you, they're just sales women." Piccolo assured himself. He proudly marched towards the exit, now feeling much more comfortable.
"I'm ba." The woman said trailing off. She looked around and notice a green head heading for the exit. "Oh no you don't!" She yelled as she pressed as she took out a walky talky and pressed in the red button. "He have a 123, male, 6.6ft, and bout 160 pounds. Oh yea and he's green. Close all exits." She spoke into the speaker. "Roger that," A woman's voice answered as the sales lady made way for the exit.
Piccolo's elf ears perked up and began to twitch madly. "I hear something." Piccolo said as he gave a look around. He squinted and saw a whole bunch of heads appearing over the aisles. "What?" Piccolo asked as he raised a brow. And then the exit suddenly closed. Piccolo jumped up and looked around only to find A STAMPEDE OF SALES LADIES!
"Get him!" One of them yelled, charging towards the helpless lima bean. He recognized one of them as the sales lady he left, god he wished he would've listened to his instincts. They grew closer and closer until.
SC: Yeah I know it's kinda a cliff hanger but that's fan fiction for ya.
CK: