Title: Scary Movies
Summary: Anya is exposed to a movie she might not be ready for. One shot, 500 words, X/A.
Disclaimer: Anya and Xander belong to Joss. All quotes in italics belong to the movie they come from and the people who said movie belongs to.
Author's notes: Just an idea that came to me in math class. Movie shall be revealed as the story goes on, because it will be slowly more apparent at what is to happen.
"Anya, I'm telling you, this is the greatest movie ever," Xander insisted.
"That's what you say about every movie you rent," Anya whined. The appeal of movies to humans never made much sense to her, yet Xander insisted that's what "normal people" were supposed to do on dates.
"Anya, trust me, this movie is great. Me and Willow have seen it twenty times."
"Oh, sure, Willow liked it," Anya rolled her eyes and flopped back onto the couch.
"Just watch it, okay?" Xander sighed, walking up to the TV and putting in the tape.
Xander still cracked up every time he watched this movie, and even recited some of the lines. Meanwhile, Anya seemed rather unaffected by the whole ordeal, sighing loudly once in awhile and mumbling about historical inaccuracies.
"It's not supposed to be accurate. It's Monty Python. History is just not an issue," Xander said, just wanting to ignore it and continue to laugh at the movie.
Although, when he rented this movie, there was one thing he forgot about. Anyone who has seen said movie will attest to the fact that it's a difficult thing to forget, but unfortunately, today it slipped Xander's mind.
"Behold the cave of Kyre Banorg!"
Suddenly, Xander remembered. He looked at Anya, trying to hide the fact that he was a tad worried.
"What, behind the rabbit?"
Anya looked at Xander, shocked. "You didn't tell me there were rabbits in this movie!" she said, accusingly.
"Well, that's no ordinary rabbit. That's the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on."
Anya cringed. She could barely even look at the screen.
"Look, that rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile wide, it's a killer!"
Anya gasped. Xander briefly considered turning the tape off, but it was already too late.
"Look!"
Anya screamed and hid behind the couch, shivering. Xander leaned over the side of the couch. "Anya… you can come out now."
"X-xander… what were you thinking? That movie… it's h-hideous!" Anya stammered, still behind the couch.
"Anya, you've killed men by removing their entrails and a bad-special effects rabbit scares you?" Xander said, incredulously. He wished he had though of this before, but then again, how could he have known? He had never known anyone to be scared of "Monty Python and the Holy Grail".
"But… Oh, I knew I was right. I knew I was right all along…"
"Anya, it's a movie!"
"How do you know bunnies won't do that? They probably could you know. They have those teeth. And they're always smelling around for something. That's what animals do when they are going to eat something."
"Yeah, like carrots!" Xander said. Even he could tell that this was ridiculous.
Anya harrumphed. She stood up, and walked out from behind the couch. "You should never do that to me again. I'm going to have those dreams for weeks." She walked over and sat down on the bed
Xander sighed, and followed her over to the bed and sat down.