Raindrops Keep Falling – Chapter 2

A/N: Chapter two is here, my friends!:) Everything will be clear soon, I promise. I just want to change one thing. This doesn't actually take place during season 4, nor did everything before that season turn out the way it actually did on the show. I cannot, however, tell you what is different at the moment. You shall see soon enough…or someone could ruin it for you *glares at Yen*. Don't do that again!:-p Nah, you've been a big help with this fic. Love ya my monkey buddy who just logged offline 2 minutes ago! So, just read and hopefully, things will become clearer. If not, I'll explain more as this fic progresses. Also, this chapter doesn't directly fit with the last one, but they will connect soon enough. I'm just warning you – it has a very different mood to it than the last chapter. Anyways, thanks for the great reviews! Ok, on with the show. Please read and review, thanks!

Chandler took a huge swig of his beer and then slammed the brown bottle down on the table, knocking two empty bottles over in the process. Startled by the noise of glass breaking, Joey turned away from the girl he was flirting with and studied his distraught friend. 

"Hey man, you'd better ease up on the drinking."

"Don't worry 'bout it, Joe." Chandler attempted to pat him on the back, but ended up falling off the chair instead. "Whoa, the world moved," Chandler remarked from his spot on the floor.

Joey sighed dramatically and grabbed Chandler's hand in an attempt to help him back onto his chair. The two struggled for a moment. Chandler wasn't making any movement to get up, forcing Joey to lift him and his full body weight. Joey then glanced to his left and groaned. The woman he was trying to coax into leaving with him had indeed left – but without him.  

"I'm a freeeeee man, Joe. Freedom!" Chandler raised his hands in jubilation, "Free from that wicked witch of the west at last!"

"Wicked witch of the—ohhh." He laughed at Chandler's words, and then quickly sobered, "Yeah, but come on! Celebrating's one thing…but this…this is getting awfully close to alcohol poisoning!"

"You worry too much."

Joey chuckled. "I highly doubt that."

"Here," Chandler held out an empty beer bottle, "Have a beer. It'll be on me."

Joey took the beer and then gave Chandler a baffled look. "It's empty."

"Hey, I never said I would give you a full beer! A guy's gotta eat, ya know."

Joey shook his head and replaced the beer onto the table.

"Uh-oh, what's this?"

"What's what?"

"THIS!" Chandler remarked, holding his hand in front of Joey's face.

"A…hand?"

"No, no, no. It's a wedding ring! I gotta, I gotta get rid of this."

"Chandler, maybe you should—" Joey paused and watched as Chandler tried fruitlessly to slip off his wedding band. "Or just yank it off."

"The damn thing won't come off!"

"Maybe you should go to the bathroom sink and run it under some water?"

Chandler snapped his fingers in amazement. "Joey, you're so smart! When did you get to be so smart?"

"I dunno, I—" Chandler began to stick his finger into his mouth and pull at the wedding band with his teeth. "That's not what I told you to do!"

"Ya, but," Chandler mumbled with his ring finger still shoved in his mouth, "I dun feel like getin' up."

Joey signed in resignation. "Whatever, man."

After deciding that his mouth wasn't going to get the ring off, he stuck it into his beer bottle. Joey watched Chandler, trying hard to stifle his laughter. For once, Chandler was the one making a fool out of himself. Joey was relishing in this event, because, while sober, it was almost always the other way around.

"Shit, I'm wasting priceless booze!" Chandler admonished and then licked his finger clean, "Thanks for the great advice, Joey."

"What?! I didn't tell you to use your be—" Realizing that there was no use defending himself he resigned, "I'm sorry."

Chandler nodded, accepting his apology, and then turned to a couple at the next table. Sitting there was a brown- haired, well-built man in his early 20's and a big-busted, blonde-haired woman of about the same age.

"Excuse me, Miss," Chandler began in the most formal tone he could muster, "Would you mind if I stuck my finger in your mouth?"

Upon hearing Chandler's request, Joey slapped his forehead in frustration. Then, he noticed the boyfriend stand up and walk angrily over towards Chandler, so he slipped away to the back. Joey watched in horror as the man punched Chandler in the face, leaving a fresh mark directly above his left eye, and then shoved him, before leaving the bar. 

Chandler made no attempt to rise from his position on top of the table that he was forcefully pushed on top of. Once Joey was sure the man left, he returned to Chandler with a bag of ice in his hand. Chandler put it on his eye and mumbled a thank you.

"Wanna go home now?" Joey tried.

"No, no, no!" Chandler got off of the table and then sat back on his chair. He raised his hand and snapped his fingers, "Waitress! Another beer!"

Joey looked around, wondering if anyone had heard his order. Deciding no one had, Joey went to the bar and grabbed two beers. He returned to Chandler and handed it to him.

"Thanks, sir," he responded, giving Joey a quarter.

"Dude, it's me."

"And it's me."

Joey sighed and fell upon one of the brown chairs exhaustedly. Chandler learned over and studied him for a moment.

"I'm saving this seat for my friend. Besides, shouldn't you be working?"

Joey sighed and turned away from Chandler, realizing that it was going to be an incredibly long and difficult night.

Chandler groaned as he opened his sleep-crusted eyes. Normally, the morning sunlight made Chandler feel more at ease and ready for a new day. However, on this morning, all it served to do was feed his rapidly growing headache. After a few futile attempts at rising, he sat up and swung his feet off the edge of the bed. Then, he found his boxers and a t-shirt lying haphazardly on the floor. After smelling them and deciding they were clean enough, he put them on. He then noticed a note on his nightstand, and curiously picked it up He slowly unfolded the note and a twenty-dollar bill fell out and floated onto his bare feet. 

Hey, it read, thanks for the great night.

The great night? Chandler wondered, utterly baffled, What does that - ohhhh. His eyes widened at his revelation and he left his bedroom as quickly as his painful hangover would allow him to move.

"Joey! Joey!" he called while pounding on Joey's bedroom door. However, the noise just made his head hurt more, so he stopped knocking and groaned angrily.

"'Mornin' sunshine," Joey sang irritably, "Have a good night?"

"Uch…terrible. But please, oh please, tell me I was with a woman last night!"

Joey smiled teasingly as he made his way towards the kitchen counter.

"Joey!"

"It was a woman."

"Ok, phew," Chandler let out a sigh of relief.

"She was pretty damn ugly though."

"Oh well. Ya know, she paid me twenty bucks."

Joey almost chocked on the orange juice that he poured for himself just moments before. "Seriously?!"

Chandler showed him the note and held out the bill. "Yup."

"Wow, she must've thought real highly of you," Joey quipped.

"Hey, I was good!"

"You don't even remember it!"

"Well, I was good enough for her to pay me," Chandler mumbled.

"Yeah? So what's your ongoing rate?" Off Chandler's angry look he added, "How much do extras cost? Do you remove bras with your teeth?"

"Why do you wanna know?"

"Hey," he punched Chandler playfully on the shoulder and stole the twenty from his grasp, "Gotta know what I'm up against."

"Yeah, well, that's my twenty! I earned it."

"Sure ya did. But then you lost it after your client stole my stereo."

"What?" Chandler looked around the room, and noticed the stereo missing from its spot on the far wall. "Hey man," he began somberly, "I'm really sorry. I'd pay you back, but after the divorce, you know I have no money…but I'll earn it and take out a loan and—"

Joey smiled reassuringly, filled a glass with orange juice, and handed it to Chandler. "Don't worry 'bout it. It's the least I can do for you after all you've done for me before. Besides," he learned in close to Chandler and lowered his voice, "If it were the TV, I'd be a hell of a lot angrier. I figure I gotta pick my fights."

"Thanks man."

"Just don't be bringing home women like that anymore!" Joey scolded, "I'd hate to make you live with Ross.

Chandler moaned before forcefully swallowed two painkillers.

"Can't you just hear the air purifier humming in the distance?"

"All right, all right. I get the picture."

"Good." Joey paused and looked around, "Now, about that woman paying you…do you think I could make some money off of sex?"

Chandler rolled his eyes and retreated into his bedroom.

"What?" he called through Chandler's bedroom door, "It only makes sense that I should get paid for what I do best!"

All right, there ya have it – chapter 2. Hope it was okay. Well, please leave me a review. Thanks for reading!:)