GASP! : Finally, a friend for Luna
Precisely three things were keeping Jade and Carrot from dying right then and there. Firstly was that they were on Karmi's good side, which is usually a dead giveaway anyway.
"I HATE YOU BOTH!"
Secondly was that Luna's room, which they had made a terrible mess of, was now as good as it was going to get compared to its Kansas tornado wreck of before.
"DIE YOU DIRTY SLUTS!"
Third and foremost though was that Gateau, with all of his strength and willpower, was restraining Luna from going on a homicidal rampage.
"LEMME GO GATEAU! I'M GONNA RIP THEIR FLESH TO SHREDS!"
Twinkie: Allow me to explain the situation thus far.
"BASTARDS! WAIT TILL I GET A FUCKING HOLD OF YOU!"
Twinkie: Jade, our newest addition, is an odd person indeed. He's one-third Carrot, one-third Karmi and one-third Luna in nature. Naturally though the Carrot-ness overrides everything else.
"SICK SUICIDAL HENTAIS!"
Twinkie: Therefore, for all his cunning, Jade thought it would be a good idea to play a trick on Karmi and Luna. He enlisted Carrot's help because they are both perverts in arms.
"I'M GOING TO CHOP YOU BOTH UP--"
Twinkie: So they set up a trap. They each hid under a girl's bed to wait until they changed clothes to- er- peak.
"AND THEN I'M GONNA DOUSE YOU IN GASOLINE--"
Twinkie: To say the least- it didn't work. So when Luna caught Carrot (Jade took Karmi's room) she pursued him in search of blood. Thus, her room was destroyed, and it became Carrot's fault.
"AND BURN YOU TO HELL-BORNE ASH CLOUDS!"
Twinkie: Jade is being threatened because it was his idea in the first place and (in Luna's opinion) Karmi went too easy on him.
(end commentary)
As for the rest of our team, they were in predictable pinpoints. Chocolate was trying to "comfort" Carrot and threaten his future-killer at the same time. Tira and Marron were alternatively trying to grasp hold of what the heck was going on from Karmi and Dota who kept erupting into fits of giggles.
Twinkie, done with her commentary duties, had left to fiddle around in the kitchen.
Exhausted with over-exertion caused from trying uselessly to free herself from Gateau's arms, Luna slumped over in angry defeat. 'Damn it my throat hurts.'
It seemed that the world of Spooner and its inhabitants had a personal vendetta against her.
"Will you stop trying to kill them now?" Gateau cocked an eyebrow, disbelief and concern marring his judgement. She had nearly clawed his arms off, after all!
"Mmpff." Luna grunted, her hair hiding her pissed expression. "She said, "Fine. Whatever." Karmi, standing amused on the sidelines, spoke fluent Luna-ish and thusly translated for all present.
As soon as she was released Luna slumped to the floor, swaying dejectedly. Sighing, she walked off to her newly repaired room. "Why me? What did I ever do to deserve this, huh?" Opening the door she turned and sent a blood- freezing death glare in Jade and Carrot's directions.
"You two better thank whatever Gods you praise for repair magic or else you'd be shishkabobs right now." With that she slammed her door and locked the handle.
Karmi and everyone else blinked for a moment, at a loss of what to do.
Jade was the first to recover. "Jeez, what got that bitch so riled up? It was just a little prank." Carrot, puppy faced, cradled his face in his hands. "She nearly sliced me up; I didn't even get to see anything! Luna sleeps in her clothes!"
Chocolate, as loving and attentive a person as she is, was not too happy a person now that her beloved was out of danger from the feral psycho girl. "What did you just say Darling? Is that what that was about?"
Ever the impulsive person, Chocolate had completely ignored the situation. Carrot had been in imminent danger and she had been there to help.
That's what had mattered. at the moment.
This was a different moment altogether. Carrot was as good as mincemeat.
"DARRRRRRLLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!"
In a streak of red and brown discolored bodies the two wayward "lovers" ~insert Luna's snicker here~ bolted down the hallway, careened around the corner (just barely missing a collision) and flew out into the distance.
"Wow." Karmi breathed. "That was just like in a cartoon or something!"
In the common fashion of Spooner, let us all marvel at that which is Karmi.
Dota, who was so used to the group's antics as to be immune to their undeniable charm, snorted with pride. "That's nothing! Lookit what I can do Karmi!" She scrunched her face up tight and with a tentative flutter moved her wings enough to fly.
(AN: In the anime Dota sorta just. floats. but in the manga it looks like she has a little difficulty using her real wings due to their size. Just so ya know.)
Karmi was spellbound. "WOW!" And with a really, really, REALLY deep breath (we're talking inhaling dust from two corners down the hall here people!) said,
"DoyouthinkIcanflywithyouDotaImeanareyoustrongenoughtocarrymeOOHOOHcanwegoal lthewaydownthehalldoyaTHINK?! PRETTY PLEASE WITH STRAWBERRY POCKY ON TOP, PLEASE?!"
~insert agonizing exhaling breath here~
Which was promptly replied with-
"Sure!"
Oh the irony. Oh the humor. Oh the need of breath mint.
(AN: somebody put some Orbit gum in the staff room for gods sake!)
And thus Karmi ended up flying around the halls, alternatively whooping for joy and singing "I Believe I Can Fly". By now our other remaining three heroes were so confused and sad and left out that when they heard the agonizing scream echo off the walls, they felt some odd churning sensation that brought pleasantly grueling smiles to their faces.
Luna later told Tira not to be afraid because, "I get it all the time. Its called sadistic glee."
Chocolate came out from around the corner, idly humming a song she had heard Karmi singing for the past 6 hours (before this whole ordeal had started that is.) She had sung lyrics, something about "Stacey's mom" or something, but damn it was catchy.
So obviously the scream was not from Chocolate, nor Chocolate's doing (lest she be "innocently cradling" the newly maimed Carrot to her breast.)
So who-
"GET HIM AWAY FROM MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
Carrot was running as fast as he could, a brown fuzzy dash in the hunters' field of vision, closely followed by a gaining purple dash.
"CARROOOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!"
'Strange,' Marron thought, 'That voice sounds familiar.'
Now Carrot, as we all know, is not a very keen boy. Nope, not at all the brightest crayon in the box. However he has yet to hit rock bottom, so there was hope. A sliver, but a ray nonetheless, of hope.
He had to find safety from the dangerous purple dot.
So, with lightning quick survival instincts-
~*~Bzzzzzz~*~
Pikachu: Pika?
Random Observer: GYAHHH! NOT YOU! LEAVE!
Pikachu: ~dejectedly~ Pi*ka. ~disappears~
Random Observer: -__-"
~*~TAKE 2!~*~
So, with lightning quick survival instincts, he evaluated his situation. He couldn't hide behind Gateau. As strong and agreeable a character as he was, he couldn't protect him from so sly foe.
Tira or Chocolate?
HELL NO!
Tira maybe, but he knew what would come of it. He'd get "cuddled" by Chocolate ~insert shudder here~ and whipped raw by Tira just because he asked them a small favor: SAVE HIS HIDE!
So that left his brother and Karmi. Karmi was. well she had a hot bod but no lights on in the attic, if ya know what he meant. (AN: CARROT!) Marron was his best bet. His brother loved him enough to protect his life under most circumstances so- no.
His brother was too nice a person, his enemy too cunning. His brother would fall prey to the devil and he would be left to fend for himself.
Left with little to no options, Carrot chose the best solution possible, in his opinion.
"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
Carrot, the whizzing brown dot, proceeded to run down Luna's locked door and immediately dove under her bed, praying that the purple dot was blind or something.
"Please don't find me! Please don't find me! Please don't find me! Please don- "
"CARROT GLACE YOU MOTHER FUCKING SICK MINDED PIG BRAINED CHICKEN SHIT OF A MAN!"
"MEEP!"
Before he knew it his "roof" (the mattress) was being violently ripped from above him as a fist with black-polished claws grasped the cuff of his collar and yoinked (yes, yoinked) him up into the air.
To his utter horror, the purple dot had stopped in its conquest to watch.
"Hi Carrot!"
Mille Feuille. Of all the people..
"CARROT GLACE YOU BETTER GIVE ME A DAMN GOOD REASON AS TO WHY YOU'RE IN MY ROOM WITHIN THE NEXT 7 SECONDS OR I'LL--"
In a move that has been widely regarded as either courageous or incredibly insane (maybe even a bit of both) Carrot Glace latched his arms around Luna's waist, buried his face in her stomach, and proceeded to scream, "SAVE ME LUNA! PLEASE OH PLEASE! SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
O__O
"...................uh......."
Motherly instincts and angry teen hostility knocked heads in the battle of the titans within Luna's mind.
~*~Dgdbnozsrhzgeeitbauf bzzzzzzzz schminglehorf~*~
Karmi: HI! I get to do some commentary! COOL! Hey, is this thing on? ~knocks mic over~
Tech Guy: ~fixes it~ Yeah, its on. Go ahead.
Karmi: Thankies! ~coughs~ Anyway, I've known Luna second longest in this story. I'd tell you who knew her before me, but then she'd take away my candy. ;__; NO! NOT THE CANDY!
Tech Guy: ~clears throat~
Karmi: Oh yeah. Anyway, I wanted to clear up the "motherly instinct" line in this story. You have to understand that in Luna's dimension she not only takes care of 3 younger siblings but is also quite the talented psychiatrist (a nickel per hour, quarter for evil warlords). So she's very matronly, thus the strong tugs on her instincts.
Even if it is Carrot asking to be saved.
Tech Guy: X___x
Karmi: That's about it I think. OKAY! ONWARD MY HOES!
Tech Guy: CUT! Can we edit that out?!
~*~Bzzzzzzzz~*~
In an amazing show of restraint and compassion on our disgruntled victim's part (no, not Carrot) Luna Nehelania Pierce slowly pried Carrot's arms from around her middle and stood him up in front of her.
Her arms locked on his shoulders, she raised her gaze to clash with his in (what Carrot described as) "a sickening glare. The kind that makes you want to run if your legs weren't already bolted to the floor with ph33r."
Mille and the others who, as soon as the dust cloud from the destruction had cleared, were watching were both shocked and scared for their friend.
Shocked that Carrot had held out this long and scared for his medical bill when this was all said and done with.
"Carrot Glace. I want you to slowly- do you hear me, I said SLOOOOOOOOWLY- tell me something. What the fuck is wrong?!"
Carrot, for his part, blinked in uncomprehending confusion for a moment. This was a girl talking. A human (as far as he knew at least)- albeit partially sane - girl. (She was nothing short of sweet and nice compared to Chocolate and Tira though. No leather.)
Offering. Him. Help.
As you can see, this doesn't happen too often in the life of Carrot Glace. Because in his mind, Chocolate and Tira didn't count as girls.
However that didn't mean he was stupid enough to let the opportunity pass to shock! "MY SAVIOR!" Jumping forward Carrot yoinked (again with the yoinking) Luna around, quivering and hiding behind her.
"SAVE ME FROM HIM LUNA! DON'T LET HIM GET TO ME!"
"Hello!"
Mille Feuille, who had been watching the entire time, wiggled his fingers in a nervous wave. 'So this was who Big Mama warned be about! But weren't there TWO girls?'
"I'm Mille Feuille! It's a pleasure to meet you."
He bowed and, much to the shock off all but Karmi and the horror of Carrot, she took a deep sigh and cracked a leisurely grin on her face before bowing back.
(AN: courtesy of answering the phone a helluva lot in the middle of very vulgar/violent sibling fights. You get used to pulling a 360 on your emotions. XP)
"Hello Mille! My name is Luna! I apologize if I scared you at all, but I'm not from around here and I'm still getting used to the- er- people." Her eye gave a sudden twitch.
Mille grinned and waved to the appalled creature that cowered behind the black-clad female. "Hi Carrot! Did you miss me?"
"GYAH! WHAT ROCK DID YOU CRAWL FROM?! STAY AWAY!"
"Oh Carrot," Mille laughed, a fluttery kind of chuckle, "You make me sound like a worm!"
"PLEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAASE LUNA! SAVE MEEEEEEEEEE!"
Twitch. Twitch. Twitch. Sigh.
Luna smiled wider now, although it was painfully obvious at how suddenly strained it was. 'Must be civil. Must be civil. Must hurt Carrot. MUST HURT- "
"If you'll excuse me Mille. I'll just be a moment."
With that Luna spun on her heel, gruffly yanked Carrot by the shirt, and chucked him through the open door and into the hallway. Off he went, into the air. And off she stomped, following his sorry ass.
(AN: It's a bird! It's a plane!)
"THAT'S TWICE NOW YOU'VE RUINED MY ROOM! TWICE CARROT! AND OVER WHAT?! A HENTAI PRANK AND A FUCKING VISITOR THAT YOU'RE NOT MATURE ENOUGH TO BE NICE TO?!"
The occupants of the room, now including the elusive Twinkie and the falling over gasping for air they were laughing so hard Jade and Karmi, watched in (for the most part) shock and very carefully hidden amusement (except on Jade and Karmi's parts) as Luna proceeded to bash a pleading Carrot into the wall.
Several times.
"BUT HE'S GAY LUNA! AND HE WON'T STOP HUGGING ME!"
Bash. Peal. Crack.
"SO WHAT?! LOOK AT THE WAY YOU CHASE GIRLS! OR DO YOU HAVE SOMETHING AGAINST HOMOSEXUALS?!"
Smash. Crash.
"YOU MEAN YOU DON'T?!"
.....
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGH!"
Bang. Boom. Bash. Crash. Crack. SMACK.
Carrot slid to the ground, beaten into pulp (AN: Heh-heh. Carrot pulp. Get it?). Luna, for her part, was crying in frustration. Her throat was so sore from yelling however, that her voice cracked and wheezed as she spoke.
"Of all the places and all the worlds to get stuck in, I had to be teleported to the one place where every living grass blade and every rock or pebble have some sort of vendetta against me."
"WHO THE FUCK PASSED OUT LUNA VOODOO DOLLS, EH? WHY ME?!"
Sobbing, she sunk to the floor next to Carrot. "Why me?" Shocked as the Hunters were, Mille was not so careless as to just stand there. Walking over quickly he put his arms around her shoulders and held the poor-weeping girl until her sobs had died into sniffles.
Embarrassed she hung her face, her thick waves of hair thankfully covering her blush.
"Goddamnit I did it again. I'm sorry. I hate it when I break down."
Mille smiled at her as he passed her a tissue (Magically appearing tissues. Oh yeah.) "That's perfectly understandable. I don't mind if you get upset. Just. please don't kill poor Carrot."
As if to prove his point he nudged the bruised and battered body that lay next to them. It twitched in response.
Luna laughed and shook her head to clear it. "I better start cleaning up my room. I'll see you later Mille." She started to walk off, waving behind her to dismiss him.
"Wait! LUU-NA! Can I help?"
Blink. Blink. Blink blink blink blink.
"You want to- HeLp Me?!"
Nod-nod.
Blink. GAPE. Blink.
"Well- uh- okay then. I could use a hand with the fallen dresser."
'A FRIEND! SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T HATE ME! I FOUND A FRIEND!'
The door closed and the sounds of progress were heard.
(AN: don't you dare go interpreting that the wrong way.)
"CARROT!"
"BROTHER!"
Marron, Tira and Chocolate (now that they were capable of movement) decided that the coast was clear for them to tend to Carrot's wounds and "battle scars". Although Chocolate was in near hysterics over his current state Marron and Tira could not deny that yes, Carrot had gone a tad bit over the line.
Still, the fact that she had offered to HELP him still irked them.
"Come on Sis. We can take him to the village doctor down the street."
Cradling a moaning Carrot to her body, Chocolate nodded and instantaneously slung the injured patient over her shoulder.
Completely neglecting his injuries.
"OWIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
"CARROT! You're awake!"
"~whimper~ It hu~rts!"
"~sigh~ I know brother, but don't worry. We'll be at the Shaman in a moment."
Seeing that, yes, Carrot would live Tira saw it as proper a signal as any that she could now chew him out as much as she wanted without fear for his health.
"Carrot you IDIOT why did you go and--"
Thus ends another normal Sorcerer Hunters day.
"I BELIEVE I CAN FLY! I BELIEVE I CAN TOUCH THE SKY! Woo-hoo! Go faster Dota! Faster! I THINK ABOUT IT EVERY NIGHT AND DAY~~"
Well. "Normal" in a very VAGUE and figuratively speaking way.
Precisely three things were keeping Jade and Carrot from dying right then and there. Firstly was that they were on Karmi's good side, which is usually a dead giveaway anyway.
"I HATE YOU BOTH!"
Secondly was that Luna's room, which they had made a terrible mess of, was now as good as it was going to get compared to its Kansas tornado wreck of before.
"DIE YOU DIRTY SLUTS!"
Third and foremost though was that Gateau, with all of his strength and willpower, was restraining Luna from going on a homicidal rampage.
"LEMME GO GATEAU! I'M GONNA RIP THEIR FLESH TO SHREDS!"
Twinkie: Allow me to explain the situation thus far.
"BASTARDS! WAIT TILL I GET A FUCKING HOLD OF YOU!"
Twinkie: Jade, our newest addition, is an odd person indeed. He's one-third Carrot, one-third Karmi and one-third Luna in nature. Naturally though the Carrot-ness overrides everything else.
"SICK SUICIDAL HENTAIS!"
Twinkie: Therefore, for all his cunning, Jade thought it would be a good idea to play a trick on Karmi and Luna. He enlisted Carrot's help because they are both perverts in arms.
"I'M GOING TO CHOP YOU BOTH UP--"
Twinkie: So they set up a trap. They each hid under a girl's bed to wait until they changed clothes to- er- peak.
"AND THEN I'M GONNA DOUSE YOU IN GASOLINE--"
Twinkie: To say the least- it didn't work. So when Luna caught Carrot (Jade took Karmi's room) she pursued him in search of blood. Thus, her room was destroyed, and it became Carrot's fault.
"AND BURN YOU TO HELL-BORNE ASH CLOUDS!"
Twinkie: Jade is being threatened because it was his idea in the first place and (in Luna's opinion) Karmi went too easy on him.
(end commentary)
As for the rest of our team, they were in predictable pinpoints. Chocolate was trying to "comfort" Carrot and threaten his future-killer at the same time. Tira and Marron were alternatively trying to grasp hold of what the heck was going on from Karmi and Dota who kept erupting into fits of giggles.
Twinkie, done with her commentary duties, had left to fiddle around in the kitchen.
Exhausted with over-exertion caused from trying uselessly to free herself from Gateau's arms, Luna slumped over in angry defeat. 'Damn it my throat hurts.'
It seemed that the world of Spooner and its inhabitants had a personal vendetta against her.
"Will you stop trying to kill them now?" Gateau cocked an eyebrow, disbelief and concern marring his judgement. She had nearly clawed his arms off, after all!
"Mmpff." Luna grunted, her hair hiding her pissed expression. "She said, "Fine. Whatever." Karmi, standing amused on the sidelines, spoke fluent Luna-ish and thusly translated for all present.
As soon as she was released Luna slumped to the floor, swaying dejectedly. Sighing, she walked off to her newly repaired room. "Why me? What did I ever do to deserve this, huh?" Opening the door she turned and sent a blood- freezing death glare in Jade and Carrot's directions.
"You two better thank whatever Gods you praise for repair magic or else you'd be shishkabobs right now." With that she slammed her door and locked the handle.
Karmi and everyone else blinked for a moment, at a loss of what to do.
Jade was the first to recover. "Jeez, what got that bitch so riled up? It was just a little prank." Carrot, puppy faced, cradled his face in his hands. "She nearly sliced me up; I didn't even get to see anything! Luna sleeps in her clothes!"
Chocolate, as loving and attentive a person as she is, was not too happy a person now that her beloved was out of danger from the feral psycho girl. "What did you just say Darling? Is that what that was about?"
Ever the impulsive person, Chocolate had completely ignored the situation. Carrot had been in imminent danger and she had been there to help.
That's what had mattered. at the moment.
This was a different moment altogether. Carrot was as good as mincemeat.
"DARRRRRRLLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!"
In a streak of red and brown discolored bodies the two wayward "lovers" ~insert Luna's snicker here~ bolted down the hallway, careened around the corner (just barely missing a collision) and flew out into the distance.
"Wow." Karmi breathed. "That was just like in a cartoon or something!"
In the common fashion of Spooner, let us all marvel at that which is Karmi.
Dota, who was so used to the group's antics as to be immune to their undeniable charm, snorted with pride. "That's nothing! Lookit what I can do Karmi!" She scrunched her face up tight and with a tentative flutter moved her wings enough to fly.
(AN: In the anime Dota sorta just. floats. but in the manga it looks like she has a little difficulty using her real wings due to their size. Just so ya know.)
Karmi was spellbound. "WOW!" And with a really, really, REALLY deep breath (we're talking inhaling dust from two corners down the hall here people!) said,
"DoyouthinkIcanflywithyouDotaImeanareyoustrongenoughtocarrymeOOHOOHcanwegoal lthewaydownthehalldoyaTHINK?! PRETTY PLEASE WITH STRAWBERRY POCKY ON TOP, PLEASE?!"
~insert agonizing exhaling breath here~
Which was promptly replied with-
"Sure!"
Oh the irony. Oh the humor. Oh the need of breath mint.
(AN: somebody put some Orbit gum in the staff room for gods sake!)
And thus Karmi ended up flying around the halls, alternatively whooping for joy and singing "I Believe I Can Fly". By now our other remaining three heroes were so confused and sad and left out that when they heard the agonizing scream echo off the walls, they felt some odd churning sensation that brought pleasantly grueling smiles to their faces.
Luna later told Tira not to be afraid because, "I get it all the time. Its called sadistic glee."
Chocolate came out from around the corner, idly humming a song she had heard Karmi singing for the past 6 hours (before this whole ordeal had started that is.) She had sung lyrics, something about "Stacey's mom" or something, but damn it was catchy.
So obviously the scream was not from Chocolate, nor Chocolate's doing (lest she be "innocently cradling" the newly maimed Carrot to her breast.)
So who-
"GET HIM AWAY FROM MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
Carrot was running as fast as he could, a brown fuzzy dash in the hunters' field of vision, closely followed by a gaining purple dash.
"CARROOOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!"
'Strange,' Marron thought, 'That voice sounds familiar.'
Now Carrot, as we all know, is not a very keen boy. Nope, not at all the brightest crayon in the box. However he has yet to hit rock bottom, so there was hope. A sliver, but a ray nonetheless, of hope.
He had to find safety from the dangerous purple dot.
So, with lightning quick survival instincts-
~*~Bzzzzzz~*~
Pikachu: Pika?
Random Observer: GYAHHH! NOT YOU! LEAVE!
Pikachu: ~dejectedly~ Pi*ka. ~disappears~
Random Observer: -__-"
~*~TAKE 2!~*~
So, with lightning quick survival instincts, he evaluated his situation. He couldn't hide behind Gateau. As strong and agreeable a character as he was, he couldn't protect him from so sly foe.
Tira or Chocolate?
HELL NO!
Tira maybe, but he knew what would come of it. He'd get "cuddled" by Chocolate ~insert shudder here~ and whipped raw by Tira just because he asked them a small favor: SAVE HIS HIDE!
So that left his brother and Karmi. Karmi was. well she had a hot bod but no lights on in the attic, if ya know what he meant. (AN: CARROT!) Marron was his best bet. His brother loved him enough to protect his life under most circumstances so- no.
His brother was too nice a person, his enemy too cunning. His brother would fall prey to the devil and he would be left to fend for himself.
Left with little to no options, Carrot chose the best solution possible, in his opinion.
"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
Carrot, the whizzing brown dot, proceeded to run down Luna's locked door and immediately dove under her bed, praying that the purple dot was blind or something.
"Please don't find me! Please don't find me! Please don't find me! Please don- "
"CARROT GLACE YOU MOTHER FUCKING SICK MINDED PIG BRAINED CHICKEN SHIT OF A MAN!"
"MEEP!"
Before he knew it his "roof" (the mattress) was being violently ripped from above him as a fist with black-polished claws grasped the cuff of his collar and yoinked (yes, yoinked) him up into the air.
To his utter horror, the purple dot had stopped in its conquest to watch.
"Hi Carrot!"
Mille Feuille. Of all the people..
"CARROT GLACE YOU BETTER GIVE ME A DAMN GOOD REASON AS TO WHY YOU'RE IN MY ROOM WITHIN THE NEXT 7 SECONDS OR I'LL--"
In a move that has been widely regarded as either courageous or incredibly insane (maybe even a bit of both) Carrot Glace latched his arms around Luna's waist, buried his face in her stomach, and proceeded to scream, "SAVE ME LUNA! PLEASE OH PLEASE! SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
O__O
"...................uh......."
Motherly instincts and angry teen hostility knocked heads in the battle of the titans within Luna's mind.
~*~Dgdbnozsrhzgeeitbauf bzzzzzzzz schminglehorf~*~
Karmi: HI! I get to do some commentary! COOL! Hey, is this thing on? ~knocks mic over~
Tech Guy: ~fixes it~ Yeah, its on. Go ahead.
Karmi: Thankies! ~coughs~ Anyway, I've known Luna second longest in this story. I'd tell you who knew her before me, but then she'd take away my candy. ;__; NO! NOT THE CANDY!
Tech Guy: ~clears throat~
Karmi: Oh yeah. Anyway, I wanted to clear up the "motherly instinct" line in this story. You have to understand that in Luna's dimension she not only takes care of 3 younger siblings but is also quite the talented psychiatrist (a nickel per hour, quarter for evil warlords). So she's very matronly, thus the strong tugs on her instincts.
Even if it is Carrot asking to be saved.
Tech Guy: X___x
Karmi: That's about it I think. OKAY! ONWARD MY HOES!
Tech Guy: CUT! Can we edit that out?!
~*~Bzzzzzzzz~*~
In an amazing show of restraint and compassion on our disgruntled victim's part (no, not Carrot) Luna Nehelania Pierce slowly pried Carrot's arms from around her middle and stood him up in front of her.
Her arms locked on his shoulders, she raised her gaze to clash with his in (what Carrot described as) "a sickening glare. The kind that makes you want to run if your legs weren't already bolted to the floor with ph33r."
Mille and the others who, as soon as the dust cloud from the destruction had cleared, were watching were both shocked and scared for their friend.
Shocked that Carrot had held out this long and scared for his medical bill when this was all said and done with.
"Carrot Glace. I want you to slowly- do you hear me, I said SLOOOOOOOOWLY- tell me something. What the fuck is wrong?!"
Carrot, for his part, blinked in uncomprehending confusion for a moment. This was a girl talking. A human (as far as he knew at least)- albeit partially sane - girl. (She was nothing short of sweet and nice compared to Chocolate and Tira though. No leather.)
Offering. Him. Help.
As you can see, this doesn't happen too often in the life of Carrot Glace. Because in his mind, Chocolate and Tira didn't count as girls.
However that didn't mean he was stupid enough to let the opportunity pass to shock! "MY SAVIOR!" Jumping forward Carrot yoinked (again with the yoinking) Luna around, quivering and hiding behind her.
"SAVE ME FROM HIM LUNA! DON'T LET HIM GET TO ME!"
"Hello!"
Mille Feuille, who had been watching the entire time, wiggled his fingers in a nervous wave. 'So this was who Big Mama warned be about! But weren't there TWO girls?'
"I'm Mille Feuille! It's a pleasure to meet you."
He bowed and, much to the shock off all but Karmi and the horror of Carrot, she took a deep sigh and cracked a leisurely grin on her face before bowing back.
(AN: courtesy of answering the phone a helluva lot in the middle of very vulgar/violent sibling fights. You get used to pulling a 360 on your emotions. XP)
"Hello Mille! My name is Luna! I apologize if I scared you at all, but I'm not from around here and I'm still getting used to the- er- people." Her eye gave a sudden twitch.
Mille grinned and waved to the appalled creature that cowered behind the black-clad female. "Hi Carrot! Did you miss me?"
"GYAH! WHAT ROCK DID YOU CRAWL FROM?! STAY AWAY!"
"Oh Carrot," Mille laughed, a fluttery kind of chuckle, "You make me sound like a worm!"
"PLEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAASE LUNA! SAVE MEEEEEEEEEE!"
Twitch. Twitch. Twitch. Sigh.
Luna smiled wider now, although it was painfully obvious at how suddenly strained it was. 'Must be civil. Must be civil. Must hurt Carrot. MUST HURT- "
"If you'll excuse me Mille. I'll just be a moment."
With that Luna spun on her heel, gruffly yanked Carrot by the shirt, and chucked him through the open door and into the hallway. Off he went, into the air. And off she stomped, following his sorry ass.
(AN: It's a bird! It's a plane!)
"THAT'S TWICE NOW YOU'VE RUINED MY ROOM! TWICE CARROT! AND OVER WHAT?! A HENTAI PRANK AND A FUCKING VISITOR THAT YOU'RE NOT MATURE ENOUGH TO BE NICE TO?!"
The occupants of the room, now including the elusive Twinkie and the falling over gasping for air they were laughing so hard Jade and Karmi, watched in (for the most part) shock and very carefully hidden amusement (except on Jade and Karmi's parts) as Luna proceeded to bash a pleading Carrot into the wall.
Several times.
"BUT HE'S GAY LUNA! AND HE WON'T STOP HUGGING ME!"
Bash. Peal. Crack.
"SO WHAT?! LOOK AT THE WAY YOU CHASE GIRLS! OR DO YOU HAVE SOMETHING AGAINST HOMOSEXUALS?!"
Smash. Crash.
"YOU MEAN YOU DON'T?!"
.....
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGH!"
Bang. Boom. Bash. Crash. Crack. SMACK.
Carrot slid to the ground, beaten into pulp (AN: Heh-heh. Carrot pulp. Get it?). Luna, for her part, was crying in frustration. Her throat was so sore from yelling however, that her voice cracked and wheezed as she spoke.
"Of all the places and all the worlds to get stuck in, I had to be teleported to the one place where every living grass blade and every rock or pebble have some sort of vendetta against me."
"WHO THE FUCK PASSED OUT LUNA VOODOO DOLLS, EH? WHY ME?!"
Sobbing, she sunk to the floor next to Carrot. "Why me?" Shocked as the Hunters were, Mille was not so careless as to just stand there. Walking over quickly he put his arms around her shoulders and held the poor-weeping girl until her sobs had died into sniffles.
Embarrassed she hung her face, her thick waves of hair thankfully covering her blush.
"Goddamnit I did it again. I'm sorry. I hate it when I break down."
Mille smiled at her as he passed her a tissue (Magically appearing tissues. Oh yeah.) "That's perfectly understandable. I don't mind if you get upset. Just. please don't kill poor Carrot."
As if to prove his point he nudged the bruised and battered body that lay next to them. It twitched in response.
Luna laughed and shook her head to clear it. "I better start cleaning up my room. I'll see you later Mille." She started to walk off, waving behind her to dismiss him.
"Wait! LUU-NA! Can I help?"
Blink. Blink. Blink blink blink blink.
"You want to- HeLp Me?!"
Nod-nod.
Blink. GAPE. Blink.
"Well- uh- okay then. I could use a hand with the fallen dresser."
'A FRIEND! SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T HATE ME! I FOUND A FRIEND!'
The door closed and the sounds of progress were heard.
(AN: don't you dare go interpreting that the wrong way.)
"CARROT!"
"BROTHER!"
Marron, Tira and Chocolate (now that they were capable of movement) decided that the coast was clear for them to tend to Carrot's wounds and "battle scars". Although Chocolate was in near hysterics over his current state Marron and Tira could not deny that yes, Carrot had gone a tad bit over the line.
Still, the fact that she had offered to HELP him still irked them.
"Come on Sis. We can take him to the village doctor down the street."
Cradling a moaning Carrot to her body, Chocolate nodded and instantaneously slung the injured patient over her shoulder.
Completely neglecting his injuries.
"OWIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
"CARROT! You're awake!"
"~whimper~ It hu~rts!"
"~sigh~ I know brother, but don't worry. We'll be at the Shaman in a moment."
Seeing that, yes, Carrot would live Tira saw it as proper a signal as any that she could now chew him out as much as she wanted without fear for his health.
"Carrot you IDIOT why did you go and--"
Thus ends another normal Sorcerer Hunters day.
"I BELIEVE I CAN FLY! I BELIEVE I CAN TOUCH THE SKY! Woo-hoo! Go faster Dota! Faster! I THINK ABOUT IT EVERY NIGHT AND DAY~~"
Well. "Normal" in a very VAGUE and figuratively speaking way.