*sweatdrop* Huston, we have a problem! The name of it is D.g.! She's here with me!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
D.g.: HIYA!! MUAHAHAHAHA!! ME GONNA HELP MY FRIEND BRAT TORTURE ALL THE MEAN CHARACTERS IN HER STORY!! SHE NEEDS MORE TORTURE!! BWAHAHAHAHAA!!
Brat: Right, D.g., like I would need help from YOU.
D.g.: *cackles* On to the funny stuff!!
Brat: Kami save the Inu-tachi....Oh, and I AM NOT, I repeat, AM NOT accepting any more reviewers turned characters! I already have enough as it is!! You may be mentioned later though, but no big parts!!
Disclaimer: *D.g. cackles* BURNBURN!! MUAHAHHHHAHAHA! *lights all the lawyers on fire and runs through their ashes* MUAHHHHHAHAHA!! DIE!! Oh, and Brat no own Inu-tachi! Believe me, if she did, then I would tell her how it all should end, and that there should be more Kikyo roasting! BURNBURN!! BWAAHAHAHAA!!!
Review Responses: NO D.G., YOU CANNOT DO THESE!!!
Litwolf689: THANKEES!! COOKIES FOR YOU!!
Hanyou-Girl25: No, what you said is not evil at all! In fact, I wholeheartedly agree with you!! HOJO MUST DIE!!
Colleen: *D.g. takes over* BURNBURNHOJOBURN!!!!!!!
Meow the chibi neko: Yeah, I know that he insulted that color, but I had to find something for him to wear that was already insulted. And I'm thinking about your ideas. )
lindy*girl: Yes, EVERYBODY loves to torture Hojo. ^_^ I'm one of them.
Peridot Mist: Er, yeah, I'm updating already!! There WILL be more fluff, more Hojo torturing, and a whole mess of author inserts. *D.g. pops up again* Oh no, not you! D.g.: YES ME!! BURNBURNHOJOBURN!! MUAHAHAHA!! *disappears again* Brat: I think that that's her favorite saying....
catlover55: Ideas that you have I like!! MUAHAHAHA!!! SADISTIC MINDS ARE THE BEST OF MINDS!!
Loselen Snowstar: Cat fights...yes...good idea....MUAHAHA!! SUGAR HIGH!! CHARACTERS WILL DIE!!! Hey, that rhymes!! NEAT!!
Inuyasha Daw: I already DID push Hojo off a cliff. But more torture will ensue!! *cackles evilly*
DevilWench: No, Hojo's not dead yet. If he died, then who would I have to torture?
Lunatic Pandora: Serious? Me? Okay I guess. I'll be serious. *gets good idea* MUAHAHAHA!!! Who says I have to STAY serious?
SenshiofSilence: Dude! DON'T CHOKE! IF YOU DIED, I'D HAVE TO DELETE YOUR CHARACTER!!! LIVE!!! *steals all the candies* Just for safety precautions mind you!
On to the story!!
D.g.: MUAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!
*sweatdrop* I REALLY don't like the sound of that.....
Snowball Fights and Snow Angels
Chapter 9: Avalanches and Idiots!
A little while after the very girly sounding scream was heard, the group stopped for lunch. Miroku insisted that they just absolutely HAD to reach the temple by that night, and they were setting a very fast pace up the winding mountain trail. Everyone flopped down tiredly, moaning and groaning at the soreness of their legs.
"Maybe we should have gone with Kagome," sighed Tinuviel, "At least we wouldn't be in this much pain."
"Anything is better than spending time with that Hojo freak," stated Arwen in response.
"I guess that you're right. But boy, do I really pity those poor souls that ARE stuck with him!" Everybody laughed at the missing members' misfortune. After they had finished with their laughing fits, lunch started. Or, it would have started, IF they had remembered to bring food.
"I AM STARVING!! WHAT IDIOT FORGOT TO PACK THE FOOD?!" yelled Merea.
"Hojo said that he would pack it," sulked Squirrel. "THAT DAMN FREAK FORGOT TO PUT OUR FOOD IN THE BAG!!! I'LL KILL HIM WHEN I MEET UP WITH HIM!"
**************************************************
Somewhere down at the lodge, a bag chock full of food lay forgotten. Two passerbies just happened to chance upon the bag and one quickly snatched it up.
"Sanosuke, don't you think that we should return this food to its owners?"
"Kenshin! Somebody PURPOSELY left it out here! Anyways, do you REALLY want to be forced to eat Miss Karou's food?! I'd rather steal than get food poisoning again!!"
"But Sanosuke, we should return it, that we should!"
"HELL NO!! Finders keepers, losers weepers! I'm keeping it!!" shouted Sanosuke as he ran off.
"GET BACK HERE!!" yelled Kenshin as he chased after Sanosuke.
"WHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING?!" shouted a new voice. Both men stopped dead in their tracks as they fearfully looked at the owner of the voice.
"AHHHHHHHH!!! RUN!! IT'S KAORU!!" screamed Sanosuke as he and Kenshin took off at light speed.
"YOU TWO GET BACK HERE!!" she yelled as she took chase. Yahiko just stood there and watched with a look of utter disgust on his face.
"Jeez! They act like little kids!!" he commented as he watched Sanosuke get tackled by Kaoru. "And there goes Kenshin..." as she banged the said man on the head with her wooden sword. He sighed, and then grabbed the bag of food that had been forgotten in the fight and thrown carelessly onto the ground. "Yum...this stuff is good...." he mumbled through a mouthful of food as he walked off, "But for some reason tastes like an idiot made it....." Little did he know that later on he would find out that an idiot DID make it, and that the food was poisoned, and that his eating the food saved Kenshin and Sanosuke from being really sick, and that would put them in his debt. Yes, life is twisted. Now back to the main characters. (Don't ask me how the characters from Rurouni Kenshin got to this time.)
*************************************************
*Brat leaves for a minute to get breakfast, and D.g. sneaks up to the computer and starts typing*
*************************************************
Everybody was in near hysterics from hunger. Souta was looking at Kirara with a hungry glint in his eye, Merea was tied up, and Arwen and Tinuviel were arguing on whether or not they should fry or roast her, and Squirrel was chittering like a-well, like a squirrel as she munched on an acorn. (*snicker* BURNBURN!! MUAHAHA!! *Brat comes back* Brat: D.G.! I TOLD YOU NOT TO TYPE ANYTHING IN WHILE I WAS GONE!! NO TORTURING THE GOOD CHARACTERS!!)
Sango quickly untied Merea and saved Kirara from certain doom, and then turned to glare at Miroku. "Houshi-sama, you had better find some food for us, and fast!! Or else we'll be roasting YOU!!" She screamed this last part so loudly that flocks of birds took flight from the nearby trees. "NOW GO!!!!" He ran off as fast as his legs could carry him, searching the ground for any signs of edible vegetation.
Cheering with triumph, he quickly found some large mushrooms with decorative red spots on them (Uh-oh....), picked all that he could find, and ran back to the makeshift campsite.
"I found some mushrooms!!" he yelled happily as he neared the group that was sitting around the fire, "Hey, where did Lady Sango go?" he asked as he found that she was not there.
"She went to look for water," said Arwin in a disconsolate voice, "Hojo forgot to pack that as well..."
"Are you sure that those mushrooms are edible?" asked Squirrel as she eyed the red-spotted mushrooms warily.
"Of course I'm sure," Miroku responded nonchalantly, "Now c'mon! Let's roast them already!!" A few minutes later, the smell of roasted mushroom filled the air. Miroku carefully took a bite of the first one, and then nodded to the others that the food was ready. Everyone gratefully dug into the monster-sized mushrooms. This was about the time when Sango came back. She took one step into the clearing, saw what they were eating, and gasped in shock.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" she asked, horrified.
"What do you mean?" responded Tinuviel with a confused look.
"You're eating poisonous mushrooms for Kami's sake!!"
At this everyone slowly looked at the mushroom that they held in their hands, put it down carefully, and then turned to glare at a nervous Miroku.
"Hehe, how was I supposed to know that they were poisonous?" He laughed nervously as they all raised various weapons with which to attack the mistaken monk with.
"You are so dead," commented Squirrel as she pulled out a baseball bat from inside her many coats. Everybody started to advance upon the frightened monk, and just as they were about to commit murder, stopped and fell over, unconscious. Miroku looked at them, and then he too fell over. Sango just sighed as she laid them all in their sleeping bags while muttering, "Stupid baka houshi..." She gave him an extra hard whack in the head, and left him where he lay. She decided that she should take a quick nap while waiting for the others to regain consciousness. Falling asleep, she wondered if she should have covered him with something to keep warm, but shrugged off the thought as she reminded herself that he would probably just pull one of his acts of lecherousness if she went near him. After that last thought, she fell into a light and dream-filled slumber. Meanwhile, over on the other side of the mountain....
*****************************************************
After taking a one-way ride down the mountain, Kagome was too busy laughing at Inuyasha as he screamed, "OW! DAMN IT! SNOW BURNS!!" to notice that they had company. She only finally realized this when she looked up into the face of Kouga. Yes, Kouga.
"AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" she screamed as she fell backward with a start, "You shouldn't be here!!!!!" HOW THE HELL DID HE GET HERE?!!
"Ah, Kagome, I thought that I'd find you here!" he exclaimed happily as he picked her up and hugged her. "I used my jewel shards to travel through the well that I saw you jump into when you didn't come out. After that, it was simple to follow your scent that was on that giant metal youkai!!"
"Kouga-kun, WHY exactly ARE you here?" she asked as she fought to breathe through his grip of death.
'To be with my woman of course! I wouldn't EVER let you spend time alone with Inu-kuro over there!" he glared at the mentioned hanyou. "There's no telling WHAT might happen! And I wanted to spend some time with you in your era!" he looked at her with an expectant grin on his face. She smiled weakly back. Inuyasha had finished his 'Ouch! Damn that hurts!' dance, and was stalking over to where she was still being glomped by Kouga.
"Let go of her you wimpy wolf!!" shouted Inuyasha angrily as he glowered at the wolf youkai. "Or I'll make you." Kouga snorted the threat off, but relaxed his hold on Kagome.
"What's it to you, Inu-kuro? She's MY woman!"
"YOU WISH BASTARD!!" yelled Inuyasha as he lunged at the wolf; his teeth bared angrily, "NEVER TOUCH MY KAGOME AGAIN!!!"
"YOUR Kagome?! SHE'S MINE!!" growled Kouga furiously as he let go of Kagome and clashed head-on with Inuyasha. The both of them were growling and snarling at the other, fighting like angry canines in a death match where only one was allowed to win.
"STOP IT RIGHT NOW!!!!!" screamed Kagome as loud as she could. She was close to tears, and had had enough of them fighting. "YOU TWO SHOULDN'T FIGHT!! SO STOP IT! STOP IT RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!" she yelled so loud that off in the distance a certain other group of hikers heard her screams. The two boys stopped fighting and stared incredulously at her, amazed that she had gotten that angry.
"I'm sorry Kagome! I had no idea that you didn't like our fighting! I'll stop, if only for you!" Kouga said suavely as he gracefully bounded over to her and kneeled at her feet, "Please forgive me!" he asked as he grabbed her hands in his, looking up at her imploringly. She gulped and nodded a yes. He smiled happily and pulled her into his embrace. Inuyasha was green with jealousy, and looked like he wanted to rip Kouga apart. She glared at him and mouthed the words, "Sit boy!" and he controlled himself. Meanwhile, Kouga had finally let go, and she was happy to be able to breathe in air again.
And just to ruin this dramatic scene, Hojo came limping along, supporting himself with a cane. He grinned at Kagome, and looked curiously at Kouga.
"Oh Higurashi! I'm so sorry that I didn't get back sooner! I had trouble climbing that cliff face with a broken foot. Who is this guy? Is he one of your friends?" Hojo held out his hand to Kouga, who was looking at the dense boy suspiciously. "Hi! I'm Hojo, Higurashi's boyfriend!" Kagome just stared at the idiot with bugged out eyes.
"Hojo, I never said-" she was cut off by an angry growl from both Inuyasha and Kouga. With one swift punch from each, the idiotic boy sailed high through the air and crashed into a snow bank a few hundred feet above where Miroku and the others were resting. His senseless screams as he flew through the air caused an avalanche to occur.
**********************************************
Miroku and the others were awakened by screaming, a thud, and an odd rumbling sound that shook the earth. They looked to where the sound was coming from, and found that tons of snow was bearing down on them. They were doomed! There was no way that they could all outrun the avalanche! Sango braced herself for the crushing snow to pound down upon her, but was surprised to find that Miroku had stepped in front of her, and was sucking all the snow into his kazaana. Seconds later, the last of the snow disappeared inside the air rip, and he collapsed to the ground. Everyone gathered around him, and asked worriedly how he felt.
"I'm fine..." was all he said before he fell unconscious.
Sango stared at him, frightened, as he lay on the bed that they had made for him. His breathing was growing weaker, and his pulse was slowing down. His skin was freezing to the touch, and he had a fever. The worst part was that his air rip had grown larger after sucking in all of that snow.
Would he live?
*****************************************************
BWHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! EVEN I DON'T
KNOW IF HE WILL!! REVIEW AND I'LL PUT UP THE NEXT CHAPPIE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!!
D.g.: BURNBURN!! MUAHAHAHAHA!!!!
I don't think that we were supposed to torture the main characters, were we?
Anyways, I don't care! Ja ne!!
Oh, and Jack, if you're reading this, UPDATE YOUR STORY!! NOW!!! *cough* Okay, that said, you guys can all review now....