Kiss Me Deadly
--M.L.--
---
"Ryoko." Your voice was so soft, so flowing, I wanted to drown in it. Even though, right now, my very insides are collapsing because of you, all I can care about is how you can make my name seem like velvet.
"I heard the news from Washu."
"So?"I mutter, sitting up. Brushing the leaves and grass off my back, you aproach me. You offer your hand to help me up.
"No thanks." I mutter, pushing it away. Do you think Im stupid? Im naive? Im forgiving? Well, Im none of these things, Tenchi. Im nothing like Ayeka. How could you forget?
Crawling to my feet, I lean against the Tree of Jurai, staring at you. Its not a cold stare, or atleast I hope its not, and its definatly not loving. Its just blank. Because thats how I feel right now..empty.
"Ryoko, what do you want me to do!?" You exclaim, rasing your voice slightly. My expression stays the same.
"Tenchi, the fair is in town. Won't you take me today?"
"Ryoko, Im engaged to Ayeka."
"Who said it was a date."
You frown, you close your eyes, sigh. All these signs..the same movements I've seen for the past..how many years?
"Fine, Ryoko. Fine."you say, "Lets go."
"Alright Tenchi." I say, walking over to you. I pat you on the back, offer a fake smile.
"You'll see Tenchi. Everything will be okay."
--------
"Oooh, he's cute." Casually I work these slight manipulations into our conversation, as you stand next to me. I point at diffrent guys, I giggle, I smirk. I do all the things I'd do if I had never fallen in love with you.
"Ryoko." you sigh, holding the purple teddy bear with the light blue ribbon wrapped around its neck. You won that for Ayeka right? It matches her hair.
"What Tenchi? You want us to be friends right?" I say, upbeat. I can win. I can make you crack. You'll cry for me. You'll wish you never said those words about that blasted princess.
"Its just..do you have to point out every guy you like at this fair? It makes me.." you sigh. I have to supress the urge to comfort you, I have to supress the urge to laugh. Two Ryoko's dueling. The old and new. The heartbroken, and the heartbreaker.
"Tenchi, It makes me uncomfterble when I hear you and Ayeka.."
I don't have to finish my sentence, you get the point. And you're walking away.
Feh.
I should be the one whose mad.
But I love you soo much Tenchi..
Im like a dog on a leash, so I follow you home.
I need you more then anything.
I'll die for you..
if I can't have you..
---------
"Ryoko.." you say coldly, stoping as we walk through the park. "Do you think I want to hurt you?"
I open my mouth, trying to speak but I can't.
"Do you think that I don't care for you? Like I care for Sasami? Like I care for Washu, Mihoshi, Kiyone and Ryo-ohki?" you say, as if IM the one who did something wrong.
"You can't pretend what we did never happened. " I said, my voice harsh with supressed tears. I must sound pathetic. Not like you, Tenchi. Your voice is always so musical. So alive. It takes the breathe right out of me sometimes. And your smell, don't get me started. It seems to change with you. When you're said it smells like freshly poured rain and lavender. When you're angry you smell like sulfer. When you're happy you smell like roses. Spring. Flowers. I can feel the blush crawling into my face now, and Im embarssed, because I know you'll look over you're shoulder any minute and see me standing her, red as an apple, looking dumb as ever, and this only makes me blush worse.
And you DO look at me.
And you must think Im completly pathetic.
Because you reach out and take me in your arms and kiss me.
But I will NOT be a PITY FUCK!
But your kiss is so soft..
so warm...
Maybe just this once..
--------------------------
The next morning I felt as cold and as empty as I had before. It couldn't have been real. And Im sure it wasn't for you. I was probally your princess disquised as Ryoko, to play a little game. Ah- If only everything were a game. Noone would get hurt. There'd be no pain. If only I was numb to you Tenchi, if only I couldn't feel anymore. If only I could die sooner. If only the MASS that my body is made of would just kill itself off faster.I'd be numb. I'd feel nomore. Is that possible? I love you , and I will always love you. But does that count if Im dead? If Im six feet under? If Im rotting? If you don't even cry when they lower my casket? If Im watching from below (because We ALL KNOW thats where Im going.Your Princess says it so IT MUST be TRUE! Right Tenchi?) as you grow old, have childern and die with Ayeka? Then move on to eternal bliss? Or if I come back next life and this happens all over again?Do the Gods hate me THAT much?
Im begining to think they do Tenchi..
I really am...
You left your bear in my bed. Its so cute with the big paper note that reads, "Goodbye, Ryoko...Tenchi." on it in big bold letters that destroy my very soul. My very body. I tear the note off the bear, and clutch the bear to my heart before tearing it apart. Just like you tear me apart.
And in that instance, I hate you.
And Im crying, because I know I can't hate you forever.
And once I stop hating you it'll hurt even worse.
And its already ripping my heart apart.
((Tbc))
--M.L.--
---
"Ryoko." Your voice was so soft, so flowing, I wanted to drown in it. Even though, right now, my very insides are collapsing because of you, all I can care about is how you can make my name seem like velvet.
"I heard the news from Washu."
"So?"I mutter, sitting up. Brushing the leaves and grass off my back, you aproach me. You offer your hand to help me up.
"No thanks." I mutter, pushing it away. Do you think Im stupid? Im naive? Im forgiving? Well, Im none of these things, Tenchi. Im nothing like Ayeka. How could you forget?
Crawling to my feet, I lean against the Tree of Jurai, staring at you. Its not a cold stare, or atleast I hope its not, and its definatly not loving. Its just blank. Because thats how I feel right now..empty.
"Ryoko, what do you want me to do!?" You exclaim, rasing your voice slightly. My expression stays the same.
"Tenchi, the fair is in town. Won't you take me today?"
"Ryoko, Im engaged to Ayeka."
"Who said it was a date."
You frown, you close your eyes, sigh. All these signs..the same movements I've seen for the past..how many years?
"Fine, Ryoko. Fine."you say, "Lets go."
"Alright Tenchi." I say, walking over to you. I pat you on the back, offer a fake smile.
"You'll see Tenchi. Everything will be okay."
--------
"Oooh, he's cute." Casually I work these slight manipulations into our conversation, as you stand next to me. I point at diffrent guys, I giggle, I smirk. I do all the things I'd do if I had never fallen in love with you.
"Ryoko." you sigh, holding the purple teddy bear with the light blue ribbon wrapped around its neck. You won that for Ayeka right? It matches her hair.
"What Tenchi? You want us to be friends right?" I say, upbeat. I can win. I can make you crack. You'll cry for me. You'll wish you never said those words about that blasted princess.
"Its just..do you have to point out every guy you like at this fair? It makes me.." you sigh. I have to supress the urge to comfort you, I have to supress the urge to laugh. Two Ryoko's dueling. The old and new. The heartbroken, and the heartbreaker.
"Tenchi, It makes me uncomfterble when I hear you and Ayeka.."
I don't have to finish my sentence, you get the point. And you're walking away.
Feh.
I should be the one whose mad.
But I love you soo much Tenchi..
Im like a dog on a leash, so I follow you home.
I need you more then anything.
I'll die for you..
if I can't have you..
---------
"Ryoko.." you say coldly, stoping as we walk through the park. "Do you think I want to hurt you?"
I open my mouth, trying to speak but I can't.
"Do you think that I don't care for you? Like I care for Sasami? Like I care for Washu, Mihoshi, Kiyone and Ryo-ohki?" you say, as if IM the one who did something wrong.
"You can't pretend what we did never happened. " I said, my voice harsh with supressed tears. I must sound pathetic. Not like you, Tenchi. Your voice is always so musical. So alive. It takes the breathe right out of me sometimes. And your smell, don't get me started. It seems to change with you. When you're said it smells like freshly poured rain and lavender. When you're angry you smell like sulfer. When you're happy you smell like roses. Spring. Flowers. I can feel the blush crawling into my face now, and Im embarssed, because I know you'll look over you're shoulder any minute and see me standing her, red as an apple, looking dumb as ever, and this only makes me blush worse.
And you DO look at me.
And you must think Im completly pathetic.
Because you reach out and take me in your arms and kiss me.
But I will NOT be a PITY FUCK!
But your kiss is so soft..
so warm...
Maybe just this once..
--------------------------
The next morning I felt as cold and as empty as I had before. It couldn't have been real. And Im sure it wasn't for you. I was probally your princess disquised as Ryoko, to play a little game. Ah- If only everything were a game. Noone would get hurt. There'd be no pain. If only I was numb to you Tenchi, if only I couldn't feel anymore. If only I could die sooner. If only the MASS that my body is made of would just kill itself off faster.I'd be numb. I'd feel nomore. Is that possible? I love you , and I will always love you. But does that count if Im dead? If Im six feet under? If Im rotting? If you don't even cry when they lower my casket? If Im watching from below (because We ALL KNOW thats where Im going.Your Princess says it so IT MUST be TRUE! Right Tenchi?) as you grow old, have childern and die with Ayeka? Then move on to eternal bliss? Or if I come back next life and this happens all over again?Do the Gods hate me THAT much?
Im begining to think they do Tenchi..
I really am...
You left your bear in my bed. Its so cute with the big paper note that reads, "Goodbye, Ryoko...Tenchi." on it in big bold letters that destroy my very soul. My very body. I tear the note off the bear, and clutch the bear to my heart before tearing it apart. Just like you tear me apart.
And in that instance, I hate you.
And Im crying, because I know I can't hate you forever.
And once I stop hating you it'll hurt even worse.
And its already ripping my heart apart.
((Tbc))