(Inu Yasha: Okay! Here comes the fun stuff!)
(Shippou: Should I start running?)
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Inu Yasha's Guide to Mating
Chapter 3
Setting Up for the Date
Yes, you know what to look for, what to show, and where to find a mate. By now you have in mind the person you want to ask out…If you don't, then there's still something wrong with you….
(Shippou: *sarcasm* Real compassionate, Inu Yasha…)
(Inu Yasha: Last time I checked, Shippou, I was the expert and you were the one taking notes…)
(Kagome: *Sitting a few feet away, reading her horror story, not listening to them*)
Now, like I was saying, when you ask someone out, the worst they can say is no….unless they say no and laugh….or say no and throw their freaking book in your face and stomp off angrily….or get all flustered and sit you to kingdom come! ;;;;;
(Shippou: Inu Yasha, just ask her out already.)
(Inu Yasha: Hold on! Give me a second! ;;;)
(Kagome: *Turns a page in her book*)
(Inu Yasha: *clears his throat* Here is an example of asking someone out….it's easy *voice cracks a little*..)
(Inu Yasha: *walks over to Kagome, a safe distance to make sure he can duck if she throws her book again* Um, Kagome?)
(Kagome: *looks up at him and sweatdrops as if sensing what it is he wants*)
(Inu Yasha: I was just wondering, if you would like to -)
(Kagome: Inu Yasha?)
(Inu Yasha: Yeah?)
(Kagome: Would you like to spend the day together tomorrow? =^_^=)
(Inu Yasha: Um…*light blush* sure, I guess…)
(Kagome: Great! ^_^ *she gallops away*)
(Inu Yasha: *blink* *blink* ^___^ See?? That's how you do it!! ;;;;)
(Shippou: *Sarcasm* wow, Inu Yasha! You're the man!)
(Inu Yasha: whew..;;;; *wipes sweat off of his forehead*)
You may think that the asking out part was the hard part, but the hard part has only just begun! PREPARE FOR THE HORROR OF PREDATE JITTERS!!!
(Shippou: Okay, now I'm afraid. ;;;;)
Setting up for the date! MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA!!! Spending the next three hours of you life, getting ready for a date that could last anywhere from the whole day to thirty seconds depending on your behavior! Ending either in success, or despair! And if it ends in success, it will only mean that you have to plan ANOTHER date!!!
(Shippou: Maybe the horror story Kagome was reading was this one. ;;;;;)
Plan where you are going to go first. And when you find out where you're going, it would probably be a good idea to tell your date where that is so that they can meet you at the right place. Unless you're planning a surprise for them. Suprises can be pretty romantic and exciting, depending on where they are. If you're planning a surprise trip to the beach or a beautiful sunset, they will be quite impressed with you. If you're planning a surprise trip to KFC, well, that might be great if you're date is not romantically inclined and they have a strange fetish for fried chicken.
(Shippou: What, like you do?)
(Inu Yasha: I don't have a fetish for chicken!!)
(Shippou: Oh right, it's ramen you love.)
Dressing for a date. The date can be casual, formal, or natural…
(Shippou: What's natural?)
(Inu Yasha: ^ ^ heheh)
There are many places you can go. Restaurants, Shooting galleries, Picnic sights, Forests, his/her house or yours ^_~, the beach (as explained above), skiing resorts, the movie theatre, museums, swimming pools, bowling, go carts (GO CARTS RULE!!), arcades, the mall, the carnival, just to name a few places off the top of my head…
(Shippou: *mutters* Didn't know he had that much in his head…)
(Inu Yasha: I heard that Shippou!!)
(Shippou: Eep! What a bloodhound!)
Just make sure that wherever you go is someplace you both will enjoy, it will fit your budget, and it's still romantic.
(Shippou: Kinda limit's your choices, doesn't it?)
(Inu Yasha: Shippou, I swear, if you don't shut up-!)
(Shippou: Okay! Okay! I'll be a good boy!)
Colonge or perfume is good. Nothing like a nice smell to arouse you're mate. Though Kagome smells so good, she doesn't even need perfume…Oh crap, did I say that out loud? Anyway, if you're a woman you'll need makeup and hair styling and all that jazz, whatever you do…personally, guy's don't care if you have makeup on or not….and whether you're hair looks good or like you just rolled out of bed, they still find you attractive.
(Shippou: Well, I guess that's sweet. ^_^)
In fact, just showing up on their doorstep wearing nothing but a rose in your mouth generally seems to make your mate happy…that or it'll shock them into acoma…
(Shippou: T_T *sigh*)
(Inu Yasha: *holds up a baseball bat* did you say something, Shippou?)
(Shippou: *quickly and quitely* Nope!)
(Inu Yasha: You keep interrupting me and I keep losing my place!)
Then there's the date emergency kit which includes an extra twenty dollar bill, a needle and thread for just in case, deodorant, safety pins, band aids, breath mints, salt packets, moist towelets, and if you're driving, an extra tank of gas.
Next chapter, the Date! ^_^V
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Question and Answer
Question #1 from Divine-Heart: If there were only two options you could choose from about a girl's physical appearance, would you choose large breast or a pretty face?
Inu Yasha's Answer: Would those be my only choices at the time? Oh wait, there's meaning behind them. You're asking me if I would rather say a pretty face and look like a lying bastard, or if I would say large breasts and look like a filthy pervert…well…I guess I like both…Kagome has both….what's wrong with that?
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Question #2, 3, 4, 5 from Allora: What (besides Kogomae and kikio) do you consider pretty? And do you like it when people hit you over the head? And did kid's tease you when you were groing up? And lastly are you more of a dog boy or cat boy?
Inu Yasha's Answer: Good lord, woman! What's with the third degree??? Feh! In order of questions, no comment. ; no why would I? ; Yes ; and dog boy of course! Do I look like a cat to you?? WAIT! Don't answer that!! ;;; I told you NOT to answer that!! Lord! ;;;;
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Question #6 from wouldn't_u_like_2_no: so inu yasha did u write this book so kagome will read it? and after will u ask her to be yer mate? ^_~
Inu Yasha's Answer: HEY!! You can't go giving away the story line like that!! *crumples up paper and tosses it over his shoulder*
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Question #7 from omnitoad: "how many woman have you gotten with inuyasha?" i mean if you right a book about it you better have a lot of experience.
Inu Yasha's Answer: Does that include love or prostitutes? Hmm…lemme think…if you're thinking about love then three…if you mean prostitutes then that's a number too high for me to count. Ask Shio, he's the one who's actually keeping track…the freako….
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Question #8 from Biganimefan: How did you get the insite?
Inu Yasha's answer: ^__^ Let's just say I get around….
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Question #9 from Mary: What if you're truly in love with
someone, but they don't know you exist?
Inu Yasha's Answer: Well that's easy, you'll just have to let them know you exist!
-
Question
#10 from Mary: What if you fall in love with
the person you'd least likely expect to fall in
love with?
Inu Yasha's Answer: Sounds like a chick flick…well…what about it? The person people fall in love with is always the person they'd least expect to fall in love with! Just ask the goofy writer who's letting me use her computer, her life is as screwed up as mine!
(Scorpiogal: *comes over, whacks him upside the head with a flute then walks off screen*)
(Inu Yasha: OW!! Damn bitch!)