Author's notes: I would like to thank Five Little Freaks, Truth: there is
no spoon, Lovely-Ryuichi and especially Blinkie who hauled me out of my
trough of self pity and despair with her words of encouragement. Thank you,
I owe you big.
I would also like to inform (for those who actually read this and find that they care) that this fan fiction will be continued and finished within another five or so chapters.
Opportunity
Later that week I moved out of Ryuichi's apartment. He never kicked me out, just like he never officially declared our friendship to be over, but it was clear that he no longer wanted me there. Every moment I spent with what used to be my greatest friend was awkward and painful. I moved into a small apartment downtown. It wasn't what I had wanted but it would do for the holidays, before I left for university.
I cannot tell my life story without the inclusion of Mika whom I met during my university days, and later, through a series of confusing events, married.
I met her during orientation day. She struck me as a beautiful, strong willed, capable, in-control woman. She embodied all the qualities I admired and respected and we became friends easily.
Usuegi Mika was a very interesting person. She had come all the way from Kyoto to study business, leaving behind her 2 younger brothers and elderly father. Her mother died a few years ago and she acted as a mother figure for her brothers Eiri, aged 9 and Tatsuha, 3. I admired her even more for her strength; she lived through the grief of losing her mother and she had managed to bring up her brothers. She was an extraordinary person and I held her in the highest esteem.
I was never physically attracted to her and had thought of her as nothing more than a platonic friend. Perhaps she had liked me in a more than platonic way, and perhaps, subconsciously, I knew how she felt about me but, during our 3 years of schooling together, I had never considered us.
The 3 years passed fairly smoothly with nothing of importance having happened, and Mika and I graduated with a degree in business. To celebrate, Mika invited me to the Usuegi ancestral home to meet the family I had heard so many stories about.
It had been the first time I left Tokyo since I arrived some several years earlier and I was reminded strangely of my- that is to say- my mother's family. I had not really though about them since I left and I wondered about how they were. I wondered about my cousin who would be about 5 years old. I wondered if they had any more children. I wondered if they had been looking for me all this time, at that thought I felt intensely guilty. Aunt Suguru would have been upset, to say the least, and I resolved to visit them one day.
The usuegis gave me a warm welcome- a familial welcome; a welcome I hadn't received for a few years. I found myself instant friendships in Mika's father, Tatsuha and shy Eiri, but the person who I liked most was Eiri. Small, blond and outcast, I saw more than a little of myself in the 13 year old boy. Mika had told me about Eiri. He had been a bright and happy child, but had changed into a quiet, depressed introvert during his primary school years. He was misfit in the family and fought constantly with his father who wanted him to follow in his footsteps and become a monk, but of course Eiri refused, hence causing a bitter family feud. I was sympathetic for him, as it seemed that he was worse off than even myself at his age.
A few weeks into my stay, Eiri came home injured. We all questioned him, and tried to drag out an explanation but he would only shake his head blink back the tears that never left his eyes. I had an idea of what had happened, having had it happen to me countless time, but it was useless to pursue it, so we waited for Mika's father to come home.
Usuegi -san was not a man to be messed with, and as Mika broke the news to him, I saw his expression turn deadly and cold. He left us, without a word, and went straight to the living room where Eiri was watching Television. I started to follow him, but Mika stopped me, shaking her head. "Its best to leave them alone." "Will they be alright?" "Yes, father's the only one who Eiri's afraid of, and if anyone can drag the truth out of him, its father." I nodded, but was nowhere near convinced. It seemed that Usegi-san was a very violent man, and I worried for Eiri, after all, it was not his fault.
Voices rose and fell in the living room for half and hour before it came to an abrupt stop with the slamming and locking of Eiri's door. We emerged from Mika's room and met Usuegi-san in the corridor. He was livid and after a few minutes of silence, Mika dared to ask: "father, did you find out?" "No! He refused to tell me and when I threatened to make him, he ran off to his room!" "He didn't tell you anything at all?" "No! That boy is getting out of hand. First he refuses to be monk, though it is the family tradition, and now he is hiding things-no doubt shameful things-from his own father! One day-" "Father, you're too hard on him." " I am no too hard on him. He needs to learn-" "But he's only 13!" Tatsuha began to cry, adding to the confusion and noise. I sensed that it was time for me to leave, so I crept away to my room.
My room was at the end of the corridor and as I passed Eiri's room, I heard muffled, heart wrenching sobs. I hesitated-this was, after all, none of my business-before taking a deep breath and knocking gently on the door. The sobs stopped for a moment. "G-go away!" a squeaky, adolescent voice shouted. I knocked again. "I said Go away!" "Eiri let me in." "S-Seguchi-san?" I heard the door being unlocked and a second later I was being admitted into his room. I hadn't expected him to actually let me in, I did what I did merely out of compassion and sympathy, but I was glad that he had. " Eiri, would you like to talk?" "No, you wouldn't understand." I smiled and stroked his beautiful golden hair away from his equally beautiful face. "You'll be surprised." "Nobody understands!" My smile disappeared and I felt my own eyes prickling with tears and turned away from him. I knew the feeling only too well. "Yes, they don't know what its like to be outcast but I do, Eiri. It feels like you're alone, and no one, not even your own mother, can help you." I faced him again, tears banished, and found that he was no longer crying, but smiling, eyes wide with awe. "You understand."
An hour or so later, I emerged with a smiling Eiri, much to the Usuegis' disbelief.
I would also like to inform (for those who actually read this and find that they care) that this fan fiction will be continued and finished within another five or so chapters.
Opportunity
Later that week I moved out of Ryuichi's apartment. He never kicked me out, just like he never officially declared our friendship to be over, but it was clear that he no longer wanted me there. Every moment I spent with what used to be my greatest friend was awkward and painful. I moved into a small apartment downtown. It wasn't what I had wanted but it would do for the holidays, before I left for university.
I cannot tell my life story without the inclusion of Mika whom I met during my university days, and later, through a series of confusing events, married.
I met her during orientation day. She struck me as a beautiful, strong willed, capable, in-control woman. She embodied all the qualities I admired and respected and we became friends easily.
Usuegi Mika was a very interesting person. She had come all the way from Kyoto to study business, leaving behind her 2 younger brothers and elderly father. Her mother died a few years ago and she acted as a mother figure for her brothers Eiri, aged 9 and Tatsuha, 3. I admired her even more for her strength; she lived through the grief of losing her mother and she had managed to bring up her brothers. She was an extraordinary person and I held her in the highest esteem.
I was never physically attracted to her and had thought of her as nothing more than a platonic friend. Perhaps she had liked me in a more than platonic way, and perhaps, subconsciously, I knew how she felt about me but, during our 3 years of schooling together, I had never considered us.
The 3 years passed fairly smoothly with nothing of importance having happened, and Mika and I graduated with a degree in business. To celebrate, Mika invited me to the Usuegi ancestral home to meet the family I had heard so many stories about.
It had been the first time I left Tokyo since I arrived some several years earlier and I was reminded strangely of my- that is to say- my mother's family. I had not really though about them since I left and I wondered about how they were. I wondered about my cousin who would be about 5 years old. I wondered if they had any more children. I wondered if they had been looking for me all this time, at that thought I felt intensely guilty. Aunt Suguru would have been upset, to say the least, and I resolved to visit them one day.
The usuegis gave me a warm welcome- a familial welcome; a welcome I hadn't received for a few years. I found myself instant friendships in Mika's father, Tatsuha and shy Eiri, but the person who I liked most was Eiri. Small, blond and outcast, I saw more than a little of myself in the 13 year old boy. Mika had told me about Eiri. He had been a bright and happy child, but had changed into a quiet, depressed introvert during his primary school years. He was misfit in the family and fought constantly with his father who wanted him to follow in his footsteps and become a monk, but of course Eiri refused, hence causing a bitter family feud. I was sympathetic for him, as it seemed that he was worse off than even myself at his age.
A few weeks into my stay, Eiri came home injured. We all questioned him, and tried to drag out an explanation but he would only shake his head blink back the tears that never left his eyes. I had an idea of what had happened, having had it happen to me countless time, but it was useless to pursue it, so we waited for Mika's father to come home.
Usuegi -san was not a man to be messed with, and as Mika broke the news to him, I saw his expression turn deadly and cold. He left us, without a word, and went straight to the living room where Eiri was watching Television. I started to follow him, but Mika stopped me, shaking her head. "Its best to leave them alone." "Will they be alright?" "Yes, father's the only one who Eiri's afraid of, and if anyone can drag the truth out of him, its father." I nodded, but was nowhere near convinced. It seemed that Usegi-san was a very violent man, and I worried for Eiri, after all, it was not his fault.
Voices rose and fell in the living room for half and hour before it came to an abrupt stop with the slamming and locking of Eiri's door. We emerged from Mika's room and met Usuegi-san in the corridor. He was livid and after a few minutes of silence, Mika dared to ask: "father, did you find out?" "No! He refused to tell me and when I threatened to make him, he ran off to his room!" "He didn't tell you anything at all?" "No! That boy is getting out of hand. First he refuses to be monk, though it is the family tradition, and now he is hiding things-no doubt shameful things-from his own father! One day-" "Father, you're too hard on him." " I am no too hard on him. He needs to learn-" "But he's only 13!" Tatsuha began to cry, adding to the confusion and noise. I sensed that it was time for me to leave, so I crept away to my room.
My room was at the end of the corridor and as I passed Eiri's room, I heard muffled, heart wrenching sobs. I hesitated-this was, after all, none of my business-before taking a deep breath and knocking gently on the door. The sobs stopped for a moment. "G-go away!" a squeaky, adolescent voice shouted. I knocked again. "I said Go away!" "Eiri let me in." "S-Seguchi-san?" I heard the door being unlocked and a second later I was being admitted into his room. I hadn't expected him to actually let me in, I did what I did merely out of compassion and sympathy, but I was glad that he had. " Eiri, would you like to talk?" "No, you wouldn't understand." I smiled and stroked his beautiful golden hair away from his equally beautiful face. "You'll be surprised." "Nobody understands!" My smile disappeared and I felt my own eyes prickling with tears and turned away from him. I knew the feeling only too well. "Yes, they don't know what its like to be outcast but I do, Eiri. It feels like you're alone, and no one, not even your own mother, can help you." I faced him again, tears banished, and found that he was no longer crying, but smiling, eyes wide with awe. "You understand."
An hour or so later, I emerged with a smiling Eiri, much to the Usuegis' disbelief.