Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon, Toei games does though. I also don't own
The A-team, Col. Decker, or Captain Crane, who belong to Stephen J. Cannell
Productions and Universal studios.
Food Nipple Grunt (FNG): Hey, I thought you were working on the Halo/Digimon 04 crossover!
Me: I was, but I want to do this too, I'm a big fan of both shows, especially the A-Team, and had this pretty original idea involving this partial AU. This is a serious fic (except when Murdock's around) despite that it's in a world where humans and anime's co-exist ala "Who Framed Roger Rabbit." In fact, later on a might give other anime characters a cameo, or even a full-grown guest appearance.
FNG: Ok, but don't come crying to me when you get an overload from working on this, Halo: CD, and your homework.
Me: Hey! That's Floodmon's job! I'm not supposed to come crying to you.
FNG: Whatever! Just hit the lights and get started! These prologues are tiring!
Me: Oh by the way, don't be fooled by what you read, I may be almost 16, but I've never seen a hentai video my whole life. Don't get me wrong though, this won't contain described stuff. Also, in this chapter, I will use Tai and co.'s Japanese last names since this part takes place in Japan. And just so you know, hentai is (surprisingly) outlawed in Japan (weird that they censor that of all things).
...And another escapade begins...
Cue the opening credits sequence with the shot of the helicopter flying in and stuff
In 1972 a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped a maximum-security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune.
If you've got a problem, if no one else can help, and you can find them...
Maybe you could hire...
...THE A-TEAM!
Starring George Peppard as John "Hannibal" Smith
Dirk Benedict as Templeton "Face/Faceman" Peck
Dwight Schulz as H.M. "Howling Mad" Murdock
And Mr. T as Bosco "B.A." Baracus
Today's episode...
WAR ON PERVERSION
The lone figure outside in the rain at the Satchel-Hanks Auto-body shop in down town L.A. waiting for someone in the back alley of the nightclub. The young man, who was not a man, but a toon, an anime toon as we'd like to call him, he had journeyed half-way across the world to meet some people he'd only heard about from over the last few years of his life, otherwise he wouldn't of traveled halfway around the world for their help would he? He reflected on those reasons as to why he had brought himself out of the safety of crime-free Tokyo to the hellhole that was ironically nicknamed "The City Of Angels."
Toei studios inc. is an ant farm in terms of productivity. While the Actors, drawn into existence by the same means the toons from "Who framed Roger Rabbit" were, whatever that may be. Execs are having pointless meetings; secretaries are putting dozens of people on hold, and cubicle dwellers write up stories for Digimon and other anime and video game tales it conceives.
Coming out of the Accountants office is a teenager with Chocolate brown eyes and hair, the latter of which seems to defy gravity despite its titanic size. This boy's name is Taichi Kamiya, or Yagami, whichever you prefer (we'll call him Yagami since he's in Japan at the moment). He's grinning because of what his stardom on digimon has earned him, 90 million yen, for his services as an actor on the Digimon, the season 2 DVD sales have gotten every cast member from seasons 1 and 2 fat paychecks in only a month and as the lead character, Tai gets his first. Good timing too, his financial future would've taken a turn for the worst in a week without it.
Tai passed through the cubicle dwellers area when someone had left his cubicle, behind him. The employee was a man, he was in his very early 40's, he had a goatee, and his black hair was parted down the middle like he was going to some fancy party somewhere. What our protagonist didn't know was that for every turn he made, so did the stranger who he'd failed to notice.
Tai was thirsty and noticed the drinking fountain next to the janitor's closet when he felt someone cover his mouth and grabbed him from behind. The person slammed him head first into the wall, forcing our unfortunate goggle head into a half-conscious state. He failed to scream as the hand over his mouth was pressing hard against him, soon to leave a mark on his face. The door to the Janitor's closet seemed to open by itself and Tai was shoved in. What the XL-haired man didn't notice was that the Janitor was on the other side... And as soon as he hit the floor, the Janitor pulled a Walther PPK (a.k.a. the James Bond gun) and pressed it hard into Yagami's abdomen.
"Get up!"
Having no serious injuries, Tai immediately complied with the command and got on all fours and was rudely grabbed from the back of his green jacket (the one he wore in season 2) and shoved head on into one of the chairs.
"Sit down!"
Tai, despite his newfound headache that would make his hair seem a little bigger considering the oncoming swelling was able to take a seat. He took a good look at the two people that were looming over him, one was the man Tai didn't notice following him earlier and the other was Mr. Jyomori, one of the studio's janitors.
"I never got to beat a celebrity before." Said the mystery man. "For your sake, you should make it stay that way."
"I take it this isn't an autograph sighting?" Yagami said nervously, but not showing it (he's the bearer of the crest of courage for a reason you know).
"You are damn straight young man." Said Mr. Jyomori
"Ok, what's the ransom?"
"Try nothing." Said the mystery man.
"Oh...my...God! You're going to shoot me here and now?"
"Wrong again. You see Mr. Yagami, this is not a kidnapping this is a mandatory business proposal/warning. I suggest you listen carefully because we are only going through this once."
"What do you want? Why are you asking me for this? Shouldn't see my boss for that kind of thing?" Tai said with a hint of anger making itself clearly known.
"He's been working with us for some time, he was more than willing to accept the same proposal we'll give you." Said Mr. Jyomori.
"What do you want from me so bad?" Tai queried
"Your women Mr. Yagami." Responded Mr.X
Tai looked slightly confused "What do you mean 'my women?'"
"You see Mr. Yagami, my boss makes a living by having anime superstars like some of your friends star in his very..." He trailed off searching for the right choice of words "...Controversial short films that star them, and selling them to some 'special' casinos in Tokyo for some top-dollar customers."
It took Tai 4 full heartbeats to decipher what Mr. X meant by "Controversial short films."
"You sick son of a bitch! I'll never let my friends star in hentai videos and I'm not starting now!" Spat Tai, not thinking about the blow to his gut that he got a second later.
"You will, and you'll even tell us in 2 days which ones you think will be worthy of my boss' film. If you tell anybody about this, you will still never find us, and my friends will be forced to pick for themselves. We've already decided to take Sora and Hikari in case you don't comply with these rules."
Tai's blood boiled over the top of the lid at that final sentence.
"Leave them out of this." He growled.
Mr. Jyomori spoke up. "I don't think you're the one who's in the position to be making threats Mr. Yagami. Need I remind you who's pointing a gun at who?"
Tai was about to explode, but relieved the pressure in the form of a sigh of defeat. If he has even one drop of common sense, and he has plenty more than that, YOU SHOULD NEVER ARGUE WITH TWO MEN WITH GUNS THAT ARE FORCING YOU TO SIT DOWN IN A CHAIR!
"I'd think hard about how'd they feel if they lost their virginity to living barbed wire. Wouldn't you rather have it imposed on someone else?" spoke Mr. X
'Yeah, you.' Thought Tai.
"Mr. Jyomori, escort our celebrity guest to his car. I believe it is a Toyota Corolla(sp?)."
Mr. Jyomori rudely tugged Tai out his chair and threw him out of the janitor's closet.
The trek from the closet to the parking lot was short and silent. Out in the parking lot, Mr. Jyomori spoke again, giving specifics on the meeting.
"You'll meet us Friday night at about 6 or 7 o'clock at Yukuzuma Casino to discuss who will be making our employer's cast list. If you're not there by then, then Sora and Hikari will have filth on their person's that Oven cleaner won't even be able to remove." Said Mr. Jyomori in a progressively threatening tone of voice.
"But why are you asking me to make this decision? If you're in cahoots with my boss, why don't you ask him?"
Jyomori laughed. "Because our boss said so!"
With that said, he shoved Tai into his now opened car, slamming the back of his head against the roof, not KO'ing him, but giving him a headache.
"Be there!" shouted the janitor as he left the lot. Leaving our goggleheaded hero with one hell of a dilemma.
As he drove home, Tai thought about the lives he'd be ruining and how it would be his fault to giving in to the demands to that goateed pervert and whoever this "boss" entity was. However, it would be ultimately his fault that he chose Mimi, Izumi, Ruki, Juri, Miyako, Jun, Alice, anyone who'd starred on the show for a while.
He forced himself to stop thinking like that. His life was no different as depicted on the show. He's the man with the man with the plan, the courageous one too. He had only one idea though somewhat farfetched, was better than nothing. Rather than go straight home, he went to the bank, deposited his check, took some money out, enough to by a one-way plane ticket to the United States, and did just that, making to sure to phone Sora, Hikari, and Agumon that he'd be out of town for a short time.
Tai snapped back to reality when a hobo in a beret, leather jacket, a dirty green T-shirt, and Pajama pants rudely pushed him aside.
"Yer shtandin' in fron a me hoz!" Slurred the beggar in an Irish accent, who was trying desperately to maintain his balance.
Tai, upon regaining his composure, looked where he was standing and noticed the dilapidated cardboard box behind that particular position, it was so soggy, it looked like it would collapse at the slightest gust of wind.
"Sorry sir, I didn't mean anything wrong." He said grinning out of the awkwardness of the situation at hand.
"Oh, that's what all you hooligansh and yer hoo-lagain friends say before they shove me in my box and break it so I have to find 'nother one." He spat angrily. " But not before lecturin' finden me a job. I've to search the landfill 3 score hours before I can find one that fitsh me, and I ushly have cutsh let over..."
Tai interrupted "Sir, I'm from Japan, I've been taught never to do that! Let alone be put in the position." He countered. "All I did was stand in front of the box and wait for someone, that damn Chinese antique store owner said I have to wait for a quarter till 11 and it's been 15 minutes since that time, I was about to leave till you showed up!"
The drunkard looked up at Tai for a full 5 seconds before formulating a reply. "antiquesh?" he slurred. "Shinneese? You must mean that Mishter Li bashter thatsh alwaysh shazing me from his dumpster when ah, need a new hat." He said becoming a little more coherent.
Tai seemed intrigued by the stranger's relationship to the Chinese man "You know him?"
"Yeah, sent me for some kid with your hairstyle." He said even more coherently, though with his accent intact.
"Are you serious?"
"Follow me lad, let's get in the garage and out a' the rain." He said going to the now closed auto shop and pulling some keys out of his jacket. Tai didn't know where this was going but some unknown force just told him to listen to this hobo. He opened the door and motioned Tai to come in after him.
The office of the shop was pitch-dark, it was like it was untouched for months and the only thing that showed that humans traveled through it was the trail of rainwater that Tai and the tippler had trailed in from outside.
Tai could make out the stranger's figure in front of him walk up to a rectangular shape on the wall. It was obviously a door of some kind or another since as soon as he opened it, light from the other side bolted into the dark, creepy looking office from, what Tai could tell from when he stepped through the door, was a well lit garage. In the center of the shop was a 1982 Custom GMC van with a bluish-black paint job and a diagonal red stripe going from the engine guard to the back of the roof.
"We got him guys come on out!" shouted the hobo as his accent slipped completely.
On cue, a muscular, brutish looking black man with a large amount of Gold chains hanging from his neck and a Mohawk haircut came out. He wore a red, long sleeve shirt with blue-jean suspenders and Red and white striped socks.
Following him was a man with a brown, dirty looking leather jacket and a baseball cap covering his curly brown hair stepped past the mohawked man to come alongside a third man, who had his blonde brown hair parted to the side like he was going to some fancy outing.
"Hannibal, your trust is slipping, I've never seen you find a customer that quick!" said "Mr. Fancy"
"Quickly Faceman, the grammatically correct way to say it is quick-" the cap wearing man waved his face around Ace Ventura style before continuing. "a-lee!"
Tai turned to the false-beggar as he took his cap of and ripped of his moustache, a man who seemed to be in his early sixties took his place.
"Congratulations Mr. Kamiya. You just found yourself the A-Team!"
End chapter 1
Me: yeah, I know, you want to see some action, well TOUGH! That's why I have to write additional chapters.
FNG: took you long enough, it's been 3 weeks since you started this chapter, don't slow down on your fans, and get started on chapter 3 of Halo: Combat Digivolved already!
Me: I'll start when I'm good and ready, oh, and by the way readers, if you want, give me some suggestions on who you want cameo's/guest appearances later in the story, but my knowledge of most anime is kind of rusty, there may be only so many characters I can add.
FNG: And umm, don't for-
Me: FNG, Terriermon has said that phrase so much it's lost all meaning, don't let anyone hear it!
FNG: Grrr... (hobbles away muttering about not having a catchphrase.
Food Nipple Grunt (FNG): Hey, I thought you were working on the Halo/Digimon 04 crossover!
Me: I was, but I want to do this too, I'm a big fan of both shows, especially the A-Team, and had this pretty original idea involving this partial AU. This is a serious fic (except when Murdock's around) despite that it's in a world where humans and anime's co-exist ala "Who Framed Roger Rabbit." In fact, later on a might give other anime characters a cameo, or even a full-grown guest appearance.
FNG: Ok, but don't come crying to me when you get an overload from working on this, Halo: CD, and your homework.
Me: Hey! That's Floodmon's job! I'm not supposed to come crying to you.
FNG: Whatever! Just hit the lights and get started! These prologues are tiring!
Me: Oh by the way, don't be fooled by what you read, I may be almost 16, but I've never seen a hentai video my whole life. Don't get me wrong though, this won't contain described stuff. Also, in this chapter, I will use Tai and co.'s Japanese last names since this part takes place in Japan. And just so you know, hentai is (surprisingly) outlawed in Japan (weird that they censor that of all things).
...And another escapade begins...
Cue the opening credits sequence with the shot of the helicopter flying in and stuff
In 1972 a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped a maximum-security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune.
If you've got a problem, if no one else can help, and you can find them...
Maybe you could hire...
...THE A-TEAM!
Starring George Peppard as John "Hannibal" Smith
Dirk Benedict as Templeton "Face/Faceman" Peck
Dwight Schulz as H.M. "Howling Mad" Murdock
And Mr. T as Bosco "B.A." Baracus
Today's episode...
WAR ON PERVERSION
The lone figure outside in the rain at the Satchel-Hanks Auto-body shop in down town L.A. waiting for someone in the back alley of the nightclub. The young man, who was not a man, but a toon, an anime toon as we'd like to call him, he had journeyed half-way across the world to meet some people he'd only heard about from over the last few years of his life, otherwise he wouldn't of traveled halfway around the world for their help would he? He reflected on those reasons as to why he had brought himself out of the safety of crime-free Tokyo to the hellhole that was ironically nicknamed "The City Of Angels."
Toei studios inc. is an ant farm in terms of productivity. While the Actors, drawn into existence by the same means the toons from "Who framed Roger Rabbit" were, whatever that may be. Execs are having pointless meetings; secretaries are putting dozens of people on hold, and cubicle dwellers write up stories for Digimon and other anime and video game tales it conceives.
Coming out of the Accountants office is a teenager with Chocolate brown eyes and hair, the latter of which seems to defy gravity despite its titanic size. This boy's name is Taichi Kamiya, or Yagami, whichever you prefer (we'll call him Yagami since he's in Japan at the moment). He's grinning because of what his stardom on digimon has earned him, 90 million yen, for his services as an actor on the Digimon, the season 2 DVD sales have gotten every cast member from seasons 1 and 2 fat paychecks in only a month and as the lead character, Tai gets his first. Good timing too, his financial future would've taken a turn for the worst in a week without it.
Tai passed through the cubicle dwellers area when someone had left his cubicle, behind him. The employee was a man, he was in his very early 40's, he had a goatee, and his black hair was parted down the middle like he was going to some fancy party somewhere. What our protagonist didn't know was that for every turn he made, so did the stranger who he'd failed to notice.
Tai was thirsty and noticed the drinking fountain next to the janitor's closet when he felt someone cover his mouth and grabbed him from behind. The person slammed him head first into the wall, forcing our unfortunate goggle head into a half-conscious state. He failed to scream as the hand over his mouth was pressing hard against him, soon to leave a mark on his face. The door to the Janitor's closet seemed to open by itself and Tai was shoved in. What the XL-haired man didn't notice was that the Janitor was on the other side... And as soon as he hit the floor, the Janitor pulled a Walther PPK (a.k.a. the James Bond gun) and pressed it hard into Yagami's abdomen.
"Get up!"
Having no serious injuries, Tai immediately complied with the command and got on all fours and was rudely grabbed from the back of his green jacket (the one he wore in season 2) and shoved head on into one of the chairs.
"Sit down!"
Tai, despite his newfound headache that would make his hair seem a little bigger considering the oncoming swelling was able to take a seat. He took a good look at the two people that were looming over him, one was the man Tai didn't notice following him earlier and the other was Mr. Jyomori, one of the studio's janitors.
"I never got to beat a celebrity before." Said the mystery man. "For your sake, you should make it stay that way."
"I take it this isn't an autograph sighting?" Yagami said nervously, but not showing it (he's the bearer of the crest of courage for a reason you know).
"You are damn straight young man." Said Mr. Jyomori
"Ok, what's the ransom?"
"Try nothing." Said the mystery man.
"Oh...my...God! You're going to shoot me here and now?"
"Wrong again. You see Mr. Yagami, this is not a kidnapping this is a mandatory business proposal/warning. I suggest you listen carefully because we are only going through this once."
"What do you want? Why are you asking me for this? Shouldn't see my boss for that kind of thing?" Tai said with a hint of anger making itself clearly known.
"He's been working with us for some time, he was more than willing to accept the same proposal we'll give you." Said Mr. Jyomori.
"What do you want from me so bad?" Tai queried
"Your women Mr. Yagami." Responded Mr.X
Tai looked slightly confused "What do you mean 'my women?'"
"You see Mr. Yagami, my boss makes a living by having anime superstars like some of your friends star in his very..." He trailed off searching for the right choice of words "...Controversial short films that star them, and selling them to some 'special' casinos in Tokyo for some top-dollar customers."
It took Tai 4 full heartbeats to decipher what Mr. X meant by "Controversial short films."
"You sick son of a bitch! I'll never let my friends star in hentai videos and I'm not starting now!" Spat Tai, not thinking about the blow to his gut that he got a second later.
"You will, and you'll even tell us in 2 days which ones you think will be worthy of my boss' film. If you tell anybody about this, you will still never find us, and my friends will be forced to pick for themselves. We've already decided to take Sora and Hikari in case you don't comply with these rules."
Tai's blood boiled over the top of the lid at that final sentence.
"Leave them out of this." He growled.
Mr. Jyomori spoke up. "I don't think you're the one who's in the position to be making threats Mr. Yagami. Need I remind you who's pointing a gun at who?"
Tai was about to explode, but relieved the pressure in the form of a sigh of defeat. If he has even one drop of common sense, and he has plenty more than that, YOU SHOULD NEVER ARGUE WITH TWO MEN WITH GUNS THAT ARE FORCING YOU TO SIT DOWN IN A CHAIR!
"I'd think hard about how'd they feel if they lost their virginity to living barbed wire. Wouldn't you rather have it imposed on someone else?" spoke Mr. X
'Yeah, you.' Thought Tai.
"Mr. Jyomori, escort our celebrity guest to his car. I believe it is a Toyota Corolla(sp?)."
Mr. Jyomori rudely tugged Tai out his chair and threw him out of the janitor's closet.
The trek from the closet to the parking lot was short and silent. Out in the parking lot, Mr. Jyomori spoke again, giving specifics on the meeting.
"You'll meet us Friday night at about 6 or 7 o'clock at Yukuzuma Casino to discuss who will be making our employer's cast list. If you're not there by then, then Sora and Hikari will have filth on their person's that Oven cleaner won't even be able to remove." Said Mr. Jyomori in a progressively threatening tone of voice.
"But why are you asking me to make this decision? If you're in cahoots with my boss, why don't you ask him?"
Jyomori laughed. "Because our boss said so!"
With that said, he shoved Tai into his now opened car, slamming the back of his head against the roof, not KO'ing him, but giving him a headache.
"Be there!" shouted the janitor as he left the lot. Leaving our goggleheaded hero with one hell of a dilemma.
As he drove home, Tai thought about the lives he'd be ruining and how it would be his fault to giving in to the demands to that goateed pervert and whoever this "boss" entity was. However, it would be ultimately his fault that he chose Mimi, Izumi, Ruki, Juri, Miyako, Jun, Alice, anyone who'd starred on the show for a while.
He forced himself to stop thinking like that. His life was no different as depicted on the show. He's the man with the man with the plan, the courageous one too. He had only one idea though somewhat farfetched, was better than nothing. Rather than go straight home, he went to the bank, deposited his check, took some money out, enough to by a one-way plane ticket to the United States, and did just that, making to sure to phone Sora, Hikari, and Agumon that he'd be out of town for a short time.
Tai snapped back to reality when a hobo in a beret, leather jacket, a dirty green T-shirt, and Pajama pants rudely pushed him aside.
"Yer shtandin' in fron a me hoz!" Slurred the beggar in an Irish accent, who was trying desperately to maintain his balance.
Tai, upon regaining his composure, looked where he was standing and noticed the dilapidated cardboard box behind that particular position, it was so soggy, it looked like it would collapse at the slightest gust of wind.
"Sorry sir, I didn't mean anything wrong." He said grinning out of the awkwardness of the situation at hand.
"Oh, that's what all you hooligansh and yer hoo-lagain friends say before they shove me in my box and break it so I have to find 'nother one." He spat angrily. " But not before lecturin' finden me a job. I've to search the landfill 3 score hours before I can find one that fitsh me, and I ushly have cutsh let over..."
Tai interrupted "Sir, I'm from Japan, I've been taught never to do that! Let alone be put in the position." He countered. "All I did was stand in front of the box and wait for someone, that damn Chinese antique store owner said I have to wait for a quarter till 11 and it's been 15 minutes since that time, I was about to leave till you showed up!"
The drunkard looked up at Tai for a full 5 seconds before formulating a reply. "antiquesh?" he slurred. "Shinneese? You must mean that Mishter Li bashter thatsh alwaysh shazing me from his dumpster when ah, need a new hat." He said becoming a little more coherent.
Tai seemed intrigued by the stranger's relationship to the Chinese man "You know him?"
"Yeah, sent me for some kid with your hairstyle." He said even more coherently, though with his accent intact.
"Are you serious?"
"Follow me lad, let's get in the garage and out a' the rain." He said going to the now closed auto shop and pulling some keys out of his jacket. Tai didn't know where this was going but some unknown force just told him to listen to this hobo. He opened the door and motioned Tai to come in after him.
The office of the shop was pitch-dark, it was like it was untouched for months and the only thing that showed that humans traveled through it was the trail of rainwater that Tai and the tippler had trailed in from outside.
Tai could make out the stranger's figure in front of him walk up to a rectangular shape on the wall. It was obviously a door of some kind or another since as soon as he opened it, light from the other side bolted into the dark, creepy looking office from, what Tai could tell from when he stepped through the door, was a well lit garage. In the center of the shop was a 1982 Custom GMC van with a bluish-black paint job and a diagonal red stripe going from the engine guard to the back of the roof.
"We got him guys come on out!" shouted the hobo as his accent slipped completely.
On cue, a muscular, brutish looking black man with a large amount of Gold chains hanging from his neck and a Mohawk haircut came out. He wore a red, long sleeve shirt with blue-jean suspenders and Red and white striped socks.
Following him was a man with a brown, dirty looking leather jacket and a baseball cap covering his curly brown hair stepped past the mohawked man to come alongside a third man, who had his blonde brown hair parted to the side like he was going to some fancy outing.
"Hannibal, your trust is slipping, I've never seen you find a customer that quick!" said "Mr. Fancy"
"Quickly Faceman, the grammatically correct way to say it is quick-" the cap wearing man waved his face around Ace Ventura style before continuing. "a-lee!"
Tai turned to the false-beggar as he took his cap of and ripped of his moustache, a man who seemed to be in his early sixties took his place.
"Congratulations Mr. Kamiya. You just found yourself the A-Team!"
End chapter 1
Me: yeah, I know, you want to see some action, well TOUGH! That's why I have to write additional chapters.
FNG: took you long enough, it's been 3 weeks since you started this chapter, don't slow down on your fans, and get started on chapter 3 of Halo: Combat Digivolved already!
Me: I'll start when I'm good and ready, oh, and by the way readers, if you want, give me some suggestions on who you want cameo's/guest appearances later in the story, but my knowledge of most anime is kind of rusty, there may be only so many characters I can add.
FNG: And umm, don't for-
Me: FNG, Terriermon has said that phrase so much it's lost all meaning, don't let anyone hear it!
FNG: Grrr... (hobbles away muttering about not having a catchphrase.