Julia felt as if she had seen this place before.
It was a long, high staircase, the stairs rising and stretching all the way up into an
unknown blackness that seemed to go on forever. The stairs were on fire – the sides and
parts of the floor and ceiling were completely ablaze. The fire was creating tremendous
heat; Julia felt herself sweating crazily.
And, about twelve steps up, sat Gray.
He was sitting on the stairs with his arms placed on his knees, his head bowed
down and his face hidden from her. The backpack had been flung off his shoulders and
was burning merry hell to the side. Julia was alarmed at thought of the clips igniting,
when she then saw one jammed in Gray's pocket.
She stepped forward.
"Gray…?"
Gray didn't raise his head.
"…Julia…you came all the way here…why?" His voice was oddly hoarse and
somehow completely different from the cool tones he displayed when they met.
"I…I just had to find you, Gray," Julia said. "I owed you too much to just let you
walk away. I had to thank you."
"You…wanted to…thank me?"
"Yes," she responded. She took another step. "Gray, is everything okay?"
Gray raised his head and Julia almost took a step back at what she saw.
Upon seeing it, she realized that THIS was what he really looked like, with all of
his impassive glamours and masks thrown away. The face she saw was like a mask in
itself. Gray's features were wracked with misery. The flames highlighted his gaunt face
and threw all of the bones underneath the tightly stretched skin into perfect detail. His
eyes were sunken, staring at her with terrible sadness. He looked damned.
"Gray…what happened? What happened in that hallway?"
Gray didn't look like he was going to answer at first. Then he stood up. Julia saw
that whatever had been withering his face had affected his body too. His filthy clothes
hung on his like rotted sails.
"I…I didn't think that it would hurt at first," he said softly. "After it…happened,
I thought that I would be able to get on like I always had. But it started to hurt anyway.
And it wouldn't stop."
His voice had taken on tones of confession, and Julia thought that he wasn't
talking about what happened in that hallway at all.
"After that," he continued, "I realized that I had always hurt. Always. Everything
I did and said…was all a lie. I was wrong this whole time, and I didn't know it." His
eyes were brimming with tears. "I'd done a horrible thing…so many horrible things…And it
hurt. It hurt…so…much."
Julia felt like she was going to cry herself. "Gray…it doesn't have to hurt
forever." She had no idea what he was talking about, but she felt that she had to comfort
him somehow – because this pain was eating him up.
He stared down at her.
"I suppose you pity me," he said, not unkindly. "Don't. Please don't. I'm not
worth it…" Then his eyes narrowed. "Do you think you can save me? You can
sympathize with me?"
Julia only bowed her head.
"That's what I thought."
Gray paused thoughtfully. Then he held out his hand to her.
"Julia…give me back that knife."
Her eyes wide, Julia clutched it and took a few more steps back. "Gray…I
won't."
"You don't need it anymore," Gray said sadly. "Julia…you were the one who
made me realize that I was wrong all this time. I had to let someone near me…to
discover that my beliefs were warped. That was why you were called here. That was
your purpose."
"My…purpose?"
"I believe that the games really happened," Gray continued. "No…I'm sure of it.
These events all really occurred before Silent Hill was blasted into Hell. So I called it. I
called it because I thought that if I atoned, the pain would go away. You, Julia…you
made me aware of the pain. I suppose I should hate you…but I want to thank you."
He pointed to the door Julia came in through.
"Now that your purpose is done, you can leave here. Consider it my final thanks
for all your help."
Slowly, a wall of flame separated the two. Julia cried out as Gray began to ascend
the stairs.
"Gray, wait…! Will we…will we ever see each other again?"
Gray stopped and looked back.
"Every beginning has an end…but that must mean every end has a new
beginning, right? Julia…if we ever do meet each other again, I hope it will be in a better
place. I may be damned…but I have no intention of dying here."
Julia began to cry. "It's really hot in here," she said as gruffly as she could.
"You…see it too?" Gray said in quiet wonder. "For me, it was always like
this…until I met you."
He turned around again and disappeared from her sight. Julia opened the door,
sobbing heavily and dropping the knife. Why did it have to turn out like this? Why did
the town have to manipulate them so cruelly?
Her last thought before she crossed over into the world of real things once more
was this: She had actually started to love him, if only just a little bit.
-------------------------------------
Gray had lost track of just how long he had been ascending the stairs, avoiding the
flames the best he could. Eventually, the fire started to die down, and he walked in the
dank, dark stairs that had no end. Voices barked out from the dark, accusing him.
"Mama! Mama, I was looking for you. Now you're the only one left. Maybe
then…maybe then I can rest."
You came all this way…to look for someone? Are other people really that
important? Even with all their imperfections?
"Or maybe, you think you can SAVE me. Will you love me? Take care of me?
Heal all my pain?"
No…I can't. I just can't.
Now there was a little girl's voice:
"You KILLER! Why'd you do it? I hate you!"
Then hate me. All you like. After all, it's what I deserve.
"I want her back!"
I can't do anything.
"Give her back to me!"
What can I do?
He continued to walk, listening to the voices of the damned.
"You can't kill someone just because of the way they looked at you!"
"Oh yeah? Well why not?"
Yes, why not? Human beings were so pathetic. They really didn't deserve to
live. None of them did.
But…if that was true…
Then was killing people really like…killing people…?
Gray stopped and dissolved into harsh sobs of pain and confusion. Everything he
ever believed was falling apart. His head felt like it was being pulled in two as his new
and old conflicts clashed and hacked at each other. What was right? Goddammit, what
was RIGHT!?
His hands were on the stairs…and he felt them change. Gray's eyes dilated.
"No…oh dear God, NO…"
The stairs became metal grating. The walls were lined with teddy bears with
stakes through their chests, the heads and limbs twitching madly as if they were trying to
escape. A horrible, arcane muttering filled the air.
Gray looked up…and saw the door. Rotting and bloody, it screamed that this was
the end, this was the end, this was the end of everything.
Going up the hellish staircase, Douglas Grayson, called Gray by himself and the
voices in his own mind, opened the door.
And stepped through.
It was a long, high staircase, the stairs rising and stretching all the way up into an
unknown blackness that seemed to go on forever. The stairs were on fire – the sides and
parts of the floor and ceiling were completely ablaze. The fire was creating tremendous
heat; Julia felt herself sweating crazily.
And, about twelve steps up, sat Gray.
He was sitting on the stairs with his arms placed on his knees, his head bowed
down and his face hidden from her. The backpack had been flung off his shoulders and
was burning merry hell to the side. Julia was alarmed at thought of the clips igniting,
when she then saw one jammed in Gray's pocket.
She stepped forward.
"Gray…?"
Gray didn't raise his head.
"…Julia…you came all the way here…why?" His voice was oddly hoarse and
somehow completely different from the cool tones he displayed when they met.
"I…I just had to find you, Gray," Julia said. "I owed you too much to just let you
walk away. I had to thank you."
"You…wanted to…thank me?"
"Yes," she responded. She took another step. "Gray, is everything okay?"
Gray raised his head and Julia almost took a step back at what she saw.
Upon seeing it, she realized that THIS was what he really looked like, with all of
his impassive glamours and masks thrown away. The face she saw was like a mask in
itself. Gray's features were wracked with misery. The flames highlighted his gaunt face
and threw all of the bones underneath the tightly stretched skin into perfect detail. His
eyes were sunken, staring at her with terrible sadness. He looked damned.
"Gray…what happened? What happened in that hallway?"
Gray didn't look like he was going to answer at first. Then he stood up. Julia saw
that whatever had been withering his face had affected his body too. His filthy clothes
hung on his like rotted sails.
"I…I didn't think that it would hurt at first," he said softly. "After it…happened,
I thought that I would be able to get on like I always had. But it started to hurt anyway.
And it wouldn't stop."
His voice had taken on tones of confession, and Julia thought that he wasn't
talking about what happened in that hallway at all.
"After that," he continued, "I realized that I had always hurt. Always. Everything
I did and said…was all a lie. I was wrong this whole time, and I didn't know it." His
eyes were brimming with tears. "I'd done a horrible thing…so many horrible things…And it
hurt. It hurt…so…much."
Julia felt like she was going to cry herself. "Gray…it doesn't have to hurt
forever." She had no idea what he was talking about, but she felt that she had to comfort
him somehow – because this pain was eating him up.
He stared down at her.
"I suppose you pity me," he said, not unkindly. "Don't. Please don't. I'm not
worth it…" Then his eyes narrowed. "Do you think you can save me? You can
sympathize with me?"
Julia only bowed her head.
"That's what I thought."
Gray paused thoughtfully. Then he held out his hand to her.
"Julia…give me back that knife."
Her eyes wide, Julia clutched it and took a few more steps back. "Gray…I
won't."
"You don't need it anymore," Gray said sadly. "Julia…you were the one who
made me realize that I was wrong all this time. I had to let someone near me…to
discover that my beliefs were warped. That was why you were called here. That was
your purpose."
"My…purpose?"
"I believe that the games really happened," Gray continued. "No…I'm sure of it.
These events all really occurred before Silent Hill was blasted into Hell. So I called it. I
called it because I thought that if I atoned, the pain would go away. You, Julia…you
made me aware of the pain. I suppose I should hate you…but I want to thank you."
He pointed to the door Julia came in through.
"Now that your purpose is done, you can leave here. Consider it my final thanks
for all your help."
Slowly, a wall of flame separated the two. Julia cried out as Gray began to ascend
the stairs.
"Gray, wait…! Will we…will we ever see each other again?"
Gray stopped and looked back.
"Every beginning has an end…but that must mean every end has a new
beginning, right? Julia…if we ever do meet each other again, I hope it will be in a better
place. I may be damned…but I have no intention of dying here."
Julia began to cry. "It's really hot in here," she said as gruffly as she could.
"You…see it too?" Gray said in quiet wonder. "For me, it was always like
this…until I met you."
He turned around again and disappeared from her sight. Julia opened the door,
sobbing heavily and dropping the knife. Why did it have to turn out like this? Why did
the town have to manipulate them so cruelly?
Her last thought before she crossed over into the world of real things once more
was this: She had actually started to love him, if only just a little bit.
-------------------------------------
Gray had lost track of just how long he had been ascending the stairs, avoiding the
flames the best he could. Eventually, the fire started to die down, and he walked in the
dank, dark stairs that had no end. Voices barked out from the dark, accusing him.
"Mama! Mama, I was looking for you. Now you're the only one left. Maybe
then…maybe then I can rest."
You came all this way…to look for someone? Are other people really that
important? Even with all their imperfections?
"Or maybe, you think you can SAVE me. Will you love me? Take care of me?
Heal all my pain?"
No…I can't. I just can't.
Now there was a little girl's voice:
"You KILLER! Why'd you do it? I hate you!"
Then hate me. All you like. After all, it's what I deserve.
"I want her back!"
I can't do anything.
"Give her back to me!"
What can I do?
He continued to walk, listening to the voices of the damned.
"You can't kill someone just because of the way they looked at you!"
"Oh yeah? Well why not?"
Yes, why not? Human beings were so pathetic. They really didn't deserve to
live. None of them did.
But…if that was true…
Then was killing people really like…killing people…?
Gray stopped and dissolved into harsh sobs of pain and confusion. Everything he
ever believed was falling apart. His head felt like it was being pulled in two as his new
and old conflicts clashed and hacked at each other. What was right? Goddammit, what
was RIGHT!?
His hands were on the stairs…and he felt them change. Gray's eyes dilated.
"No…oh dear God, NO…"
The stairs became metal grating. The walls were lined with teddy bears with
stakes through their chests, the heads and limbs twitching madly as if they were trying to
escape. A horrible, arcane muttering filled the air.
Gray looked up…and saw the door. Rotting and bloody, it screamed that this was
the end, this was the end, this was the end of everything.
Going up the hellish staircase, Douglas Grayson, called Gray by himself and the
voices in his own mind, opened the door.
And stepped through.