Disclaimer: Peter, Harry, Sirius, Remus, James and the rest don't belong to me. I'm just borrowing them for my own pleasure.

Warning: Slash. Lots of slash. Oodles and oodles of slash! I'm such a slashoholic...

Dedication: For Kitten, and everyone else who has a fic at The Rat's Tale. :-)

Author's Note: Okay....this is turning into something so different then I had planned. It wasn't supposed to be as long as I think it will be. But I've lost control of it. It's taken on a life of its own, as they so often do. If you think it's getting to soap opera-y, please let me know and I'll do what I can to curb it. And we get a bit into Peter's home life. Not all that much, but there's hints. Damn it. I always give him issues...

Oh! And good news to those of you who are following the Deathsong series. The next chapter is in the works! So look for that within the next two weeks. :-)

Timeless

Chapter 4

Peter watched on avidly as Harry and James played chess. Harry wasn't that bad. Not as good as James, but then very few people were. //Does he like me?// The question ran round and round in Peter's mind. Maybe there was a chance after all. If Remus didn't ruin it...

//Why is he being such a jerk?// Peter folded his hands and rested his chin on them, eyes flicking from the chess board to Harry, and occasionally to James. The similarities between the two boys was startling. //I think he's jealous. But why? He *told* me it was okay! He's the one who doesn't want a relationship!// Peter sighed. Remus could be very strange sometimes. It probably had something to do with being a werewolf. But he seemed like he was jealous.

"Hey, Peter." Sirius sat down next to him, leaning close to talk quietly into his ear.

"Hey." Peter turned, smiling. //Why is he so good looking? it's not fair. Real people shouldn't be allowed to look like that.//

"So...someone's got the hots for the new kid." Sirius said, slyly.

"Oh?" Was that Remmie's problem? Did Remus like Harry, too? Then why had he been so mean...

"Oh come on, it's obvious." Sirius continued, putting an arm around Peter's shoulders in a friendly manner.

"Oh?"

"Yeah...you're practically drooling over him." Sirius said, squeezing Peter's shoulders.

"Oh." Peter flushed. "Yeah..."

"He's cute, I guess." Sirius continued. "I mean, for another guy...but I thought you and Remus had a thing?"

"No..." Peter shook his head. How did Sirius know about that? Peter had never said a word. He didn't talk about his personal life much. It was just easier that way. Besides, who wanted to know?

"Really?" Sirius sounded confused. "Because he and I were talking about you...I hear there was some smooching going on in detention?"

"Oh. That." Peter flushed deeper. //Remus *told* about that? Why did he tell?// He had thought that was a secret. Most of teh things that happened in Peter's life that weren't actually *witnessed* by the other mauraders were kept quiet. Not out of any sort of shame, just out of common courtesy. They didn't want to hear about Peter's life. There was nothing exciting that happened. Peter was hardly allowed out of his house when he was home. His mother worried about him quite a bit.

"Yeah, that." Sirius glanced over at Harry, who was engrossed in the chess game with James. "I guess Remus took it to mean there was something going on..."

"He doesn't want a relationship." Peter said, hopelessly. "And I *told* him I liked Harry. He told me to go after him!"

"Peter, Remus says lots of things." Sirius said, chuckling. "Remmie...he's big on being polite. He says the polite thing, and he doesn't let us know when something's bothering him. But he's pissed about Harry. I can tell."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. You saw him earlier. And I asked him about it...he practically bit my head off. That's when he stormed out. You'd better watch yourself, little buddy."

"But..." Peter was at a loss. "I talked to Remus about us. He doesn't want anything more then just...you know. Fooling around and stuff. That's all."

"No, that's what he says." Sirius pointed out. "I can tell you how that would go. He wouldn't be fooling around with anyone else, and he wouldn't want you fooling around with anyone else, and it would be a real relationship in everything but the name."

"Oh..." Peter buried his face in his hands. He didn't know what to do. He didn't know how he felt about Remus or Harry. He liked them both. But...he couldn't have them both. What was he going to do?

"Remmie's...." Sirius paused, saighing. Peter chewed at his bottom lip, worrying it with his teeth and turning wide eyes to SIrius. "He..." It was almost as if Sirius was trying to say something he really didn't want to.

"What?" Peter asked, Sirius ran a hand through his hair, and lowered his voice even more.

"Look, I didn't say this okay?" Sirius asked, and Peter nodded. It was one of those things. Peter didn't like keeping secrets, but sometimes you had to. "Remmie...he sort of plays up his...you know."

"What do you mean?" Peter asked.

"This is something we all think, and we all know, we just don't ever say it. Remus sometimes makes a bigger deal out of his lycanthropy then he has to. And he's allowed to. But...he really plays it up."

"So..." Peter frowned.

"So Remus knows damn well he can easily have a relationship. But he can't let himself be a normal person."

"Oh." Why couldn't things be simple? It would be so much easier if Remus would just tell him what he wanted. Instead of doing something like this. He was just going to make everybody mad. He hadn't been very...well...discreet.

"I can't help you here." Sirius added. "I don't know what the rules are for you people."

"Huh?" Now Peter was really confused. He was still trying to figure out why Remus was being the way he was.

"Guys. With other guys. I don't get it. I don't get how it works, I don't try to." Sirius gave Peter a reassuring pat on the shoulder. "But you seem to do okay, so..."

"He told me it was okay." Peter said again, sullenly. Why did people say one thing and then do another? It didn't make any sense to him. WHy couldn't people say what they meant?

"He also told us he was a normal boy." Sirius pointed out. "And he actually turns into a slobbering canine every month."

"That's different." Peter said, rising to the defence of his absent friend. "And you know it!"

"I'm just using an example." Sirius said. "But anyway...you've got some stuff to think about. It would be so much easier if you liked girls. Girls are easy to deal with. You just wine and dine'em, and they're all yours."

"Ha!"

James' exclamation of triumph rang out through the dorm again Peter glanced over to see James doing his little victory dance, and Harry grinning happily. //He's a much better loser then Sirius.// Peter decided. Harry looked extremely happy. He was grinning and ducking his head and kept looking at James. //Uh-oh...I better tell Harry that James is taken.//

"You really are good at chess." Harry said, practically gushing. Peter wanted to cry.

"I'm the king!" James said, plopping back down on the bed. "You're not too bad yourself. You could beat Sirius."

"Anyone could beat Sirius." Peter piped up.

"Hey!" Sirius smacked Peter playfully. "I can beat you, so I'd shut up."

"Yeah, Peter you really are the worst player of all of us." James said. Peter shrugged.

"We'll play sometime." Harry said, and Peter smiled, flushing. He glanced down at his hands, the familiar fluttery feeling rising in his stomach. He decided he was well and truly smitten with Harry. But...he was also smitten with Remus. And he didn't know if Harry liked him. But he knew Remus did...it was enough to make him want to tear at his hair in frustration.

"I'm really not that good..." Peter mumbled, the words just sort of tumbling out of his mouth.

"Neither am I."

Peter smiled, still worrying at the inside of his lips. It was a bad habit he had. His mother couldn't stand it. She couldn't stand most of Peter's habits, though. So Peter did his best to behave perfectly at home. He didn't want to make his mother angry.

"Oh, Peter, did you finish that potions essay?" James asked, laying across his bed.

"No..." Peter admitted. That was one of the things he and Remus were supposed to be doing in the library.

"I though Remmie was helping you with it?" James continued. "Isn't that what you guys were doing in the library?"

"Um..." Peter didn't want to say 'no, we were talking about my crush on Harry' when the object of said crush was right in the room.

"Oh..." Sirius grinned knowingly. "I bet I know what they were doing..."

"No!" Peter snapped. //Sirius, please don't bring that up...//

"Oh." James said, nodding. "I get you."

"What?" Harry asked, glancing at Peter.

"Nothing!" Peter said, quickly. "I'll tell you later." He added. Harry really should know why Remus was being so...not nice.

"Okay..."

Peter offered up a small smile. He was more confused then he had been in a very long time, and that said a lot. And he didn't know who to talk to. Sirius wasn't much help. James was hopeless when it came to relationships. And Remmie...

"I've gotta do that essay too." James said. "I'll give you a hand. In a purely academical sense." He added with a grin.

"Thanks." Peter couldn't keep the flush off of his cheeks. He glanced over at Harry, who was peering at him with an unreadable expression. Peter shifted his gaze immediately, not wanting Harry to know he was looking. James pushed himself up lithely, and trotted over to join Sirius on the other bed. Sirius moved over, humming idly and picking at a thread on his jeans. Harry remained where he was, and Peter looked over again. Harry was watching them, a very intense look in his eyes. Peter swallowed hard under that penetrating gaze, and offered up a wavering smile. Harry returned the gesture, but it didn't really touch his eyes.

"Earth to Wormtail..." James hissed, shaking Peter's arm. "Essay?"

"Huh? Oh!" Peter nodded, turning his attention to his schoolmate. There was something about the way Harry had been watching them that made him very nervous. It wasn't malevolent, but it wasn't exactly friendly either. Trying to shake off the strange feeling inside of him, Peter focused as much as he could on James and the potions essay.

~~~