"New York City's beautiful from way up here…" Joe commented and pointed to the city thousands of feet beneath. To him, New York City's beauty was different from the awesome splendor of Mother Nature. Yet, at the same time, there were parallels that if he was to mention to a Green fanatic, he would perhaps be shot at.

For New York City had its own mountains and hills- their beauty was first conceptualized by architects' loving pencils then made real by bricks. Each landmark told a story that was personal to the designer's ambition to make his mark on Earth. Between buildings were busy roads and from where Joe was, those roads resembled straight lines of golden-colored streams formed of cars' headlights and street lamps, flowing in two directions between concrete valleys sprinkled over uniformly with gold dust and diamonds- so telling of the American's Dream.

Frank leaned over Joe to get a good look. Always being doted upon by his parents and brother, Joe could count on getting what he wanted as long as he did not hurt anyone. Frank loved window seats and so did Joe and thus, a deal was struck. On the trip there, Joe would get the window and on the trip back, it was Frank's turn. However, Joe knew if he only begged a little, Frank would relinquish the coveted space when they returned as well.

"Yup." Frank was a man of few words when it suited him. It was not that he was not impressed, just that he would not ooh and ah over pretty sights like Joe. Joe knew he had an eye for beauty of all sorts and Frank was different. Frank liked to decipher the meaning and soul behind the beauty and to Frank, beauty was empty without a brain.

His brother retracted and slumped against his seat. From his weary expression, Joe knew Frank's taciturn could be due to the fact that Frank hated long plane rides. The trip to Phuket International airport would take at least a day and Frank looked as if he was going to die from the ride. Joe could always tell when his brother was down in the dumps. Frank looked exhausted less than fifteen minutes on the plane and might just keel over when they reached Phuket from the sheer tediousness of the journey.

Of course Joe was going to be bored as well. Joe was easily bored but because he knew his own trappings, he devised ways to get around them. When he was young, his active imagination conjured out "Timmy" for him to talk to when he had nothing to do. Most children's imaginary friends vanished when they turned twelve. Joe's imaginary friend lasted all the way until he was fourteen when he felt pretty silly talking to himself. Maybe that was where he cultivated the habit of thinking his thoughts out loud in private. Conversations with "Timmy" were the same as sorting out his own thoughts verbally in a solo discussion.

Desperate to cure Frank from his imminent bouts of destructive boredom, Joe tried to lead Frank into something he knew Frank could not resist. Besides a good mystery, Frank loved intellectual discussions. He would try to keep Joe educated in the skeletal frame of the school of Philosophy but somehow, Joe could never be as interested in it as him. Joe preferred to experience things for himself than see the world through the words of some dead guy's ramblings. Frank once told him that everyone was a philosopher. As long as there was a thought, there was philosophy for philosophy was not something difficult- it was merely thinking about things.

"When you said earlier that I am a miracle, what exactly do you mean?" Joe asked and saw the sides of Frank's lips lifting up into a faint smile. Congratulating himself for half his mission accomplished, Joe leaned back against his seat and waited for Frank's answer which would definitely make him think- at least for a while.

"What do you think I meant?" Frank countered. He hated to spoon-feed Joe with knowledge. He preferred to ask questions because he felt that a discourse was the best way to learn. Joe pouted before venturing hesitantly.

"Well, life is miraculous… if that what you meant?"

*"That and more. You see, life is not just a coincidence. You're not an accident. Everybody is tied somehow to history dating back billions of years when the first of our kind walked the lands- Adam and Eve if you may call them. To appreciate yourself is to appreciate the intricate weaving of Life. Everyone around you had survived trillions of calamities even before they were born so they are every precious. Get what I mean?" Frank asked gently. He spoke like a teacher and sometimes, Joe felt that if Frank did not have the noble dream to become a noble lawyer (an oxymoron to some) or a noble private investigator (yet another oxymoron to some again), Frank would make a very good educator. He was patient and no matter how busy he was, he would always try to help Joe along not only in textbook knowledge but life's lessons as well. Born only a year apart, Joe sometimes felt like Frank was this person wise beyond his years while Joe was the eternal child. Sometimes, he felt like they were not much different as well, for someone told him once that everyone was wise and everyone had the perception of what was true, however, they turned into adults too soon.

Then he remembered. Frank was the one who told him that ages ago and Joe vowed never to grow up. Few months later, Frank chided him for being childish and Joe retorted by calling Frank an "adult" and Frank cryptically told him there was a HUGE difference between "childish" and "childlike" for a grown-up could be "childlike".

Being childish was a different matter. Being childish was to be selfish and to block wisdom from speaking to the heart.

"Hmm… not really… the only danger I see is if the baby comes out legs first, there's a chance it will suffocate before greeting the world."

Frank's smile became wider; tinged with amusement. Joe hated it when Frank put on an expression like that. It was like he had uncovered a secret and was taunting Joe to no ends about his discovery without telling Joe what it was- baiting Joe with curiosity.

"C'mon! It wouldn't hurt to just tell me…" Joe cajoled and Frank, like always, relented.

"You see, your appearance on this world is threatened by many catastrophes that would work against your existence had History not turned out the way it was. Grandfather could have died in World War II. Dad may perish in Vietnam and we'll never get to see daylight. Or maybe Dad's great-grandmother may be wooed by another man who was not our great-great-grandfather and Dad's existence would be impossible, so would ours. If the first meeting of mom and dad had not been the way it was- that their destiny somehow synchronized a millisecond off, they may never have met and once again, we'll never be born. Not to mention the countless earthquakes, famine, droughts, diseases that could claim the life of one of ancestors from eons ago and that would definitely change how our history is played out. So you see- you're not just an independent being. Your existence depends on billions of variables standing on the edge of a sword. Had one altered just slightly, we would be nothing. So we should treasure everyone around us- it had been a treacherous journey through time for them to have to come into the world. And we should do our best to make the world a better place in which to live in, so all those who would come after us would arrive into a world of love and beauty." Frank spoke sagely and suddenly, Joe felt like everything good around him was as precious as a drop of water in a boundless desert- especially his brother. What if his mother had tripped on a stone when she was carrying him and thus suffered a miscarriage? What if Mom never knew Dad? Then Joe would never have known his parents, Frank, Vanessa, Chet, Phil, Tony and so many others. His heart pounded when he realized the perils that he had survived- wars, natural disasters, freak accidents- and his heart palpitated like crazy even more when he realized that Frank had survived the same to be his brother.

He was a miracle baby. Everyone had escaped non-existence by the skin of their teeth.

"Can I just say something?" Joe asked, his hands trembling a little. Frank turned to him and tilted his head slightly- giving him silent permission.

"I just want to thank God…" He choked before he could finish. He never knew a simple understanding like what Frank said could have such a terrible impact on him. And a part of him was amazed that Frank thought of it all himself.

Frank patted his hand lightly and picked up a magazine, no doubt trying to will time to hurry up. Joe knew Frank was not trivializing his feelings. Frank understood but did not want to be too mushy about it.

Joe cleared his throat awkwardly. "And I wanna say I love you, big brother. I'm sorry if I'm a pain in the neck sometimes."

Once again, that irritating smile was on Frank's lips. Joe felt his ire rising and growled. "What????"

"Nothing. It's not sometimes- it's all the time." Frank gave him a sidelong smirk and Joe scowled pettily.

"And I love you too kiddo. Now, before we turn this into a tearjerker, let's play some cards to pass time, shall we?" Frank asked with an arched brow and when Joe nodded in agreement, he swore he heard Frank heaved a sigh of relief at having some companionship.

***

When they had passed through the busy customs (it seemed like everyone in the entire planet had migrated South-East during the winter season), Joe felt a little disoriented. He loved a crowded party but this time, it was too much. Being jostled around incessantly was not his idea of fun. He thought Frank would be in worse shape than him but it seemed like he was the one with the terrible case of jet lag. Frank still had the energy to look through a brochure he picked up from the counter so the brothers could have some idea of where they were going and how they were going to get there. They had taken Singapore Airlines and had made a stopover at Changi International Airport for a while before catching the transfer flight to Phuket. When they arrived at the busy airport closest to some of the world's most famous beaches at ten in the morning, Thailand's time, Joe was all tired out. Playing with the videogame available for every seat on the plane had helped killed restlessness for awhile, however, he was soon bored of it. He tried to sleep, like Frank had, but the butterflies of excitement in his stomach disturbed him to no end, waking him up at various intervals- false alarms of arriving at their destination already.

"I see no ferries listed here that will bring us to Um." Frank closed the brochure shut and put an arm around Joe who glared at him, hating all form of contact and noise so early in the morning. He imagined how he must have looked- disheveled with bloodshot eyes and Frank quickly removed his arm.

"Whoa, someone's starting out on the wrong foot. Why don't you sit over there and let me make some enquiries?"

"Yah, whatever. Go ahead. I'm hating this trip already." Joe grumbled and stumbled like a drunk towards an empty, uncomfortable looking plastic chair. He sat down with a plop, dumped his heavy backpack next to him and felt his lids grew heavy with tiredness when a man in black suit hurriedly walked towards him but not exactly looking out for him. The man was seemingly ridiculous to be so formally attired when everybody around him was dressed in Bermudas, t-shirts – basically casual beach wear. Some girls of all ethnicities, though mostly slim, tanned Asians, were wearing what looked like brightly- printed cloth tied around their waists as skirts. The beach had beckoned even in the airport but Joe was too tired and grouchy to ogle at those attractive female species who gave him lingering looks that seemed to be rather flirtatious.

"Oh dear, oh dear. I shall be too late!" Joe heard the man mumbled as he stopped near where Joe was sitting and took out a pocket watch. A pocket watch! This man was so archaic. Joe scowled at the man who was not looking at him, daring the man to come too close to him and at the time, assessing the man. However, the man kept glancing up, down and then sideways thus preventing Joe from getting a good look

"I shall be so late! Oh dear, oh dear, where can he be?"

Deciding that the man was either a chronic worrier or some lunatic, Joe turned away and waited impatiently for Frank to return when a sudden sharp pain shot from the tips of his toes up his left leg and out of his mouth.

"OUCH! Hey! Look where you're going!" Joe scolded the flustered man who turned to him and hastily apologized.

"Sorry, oh dear me… I have offended! Oh dear… I shall be late!"

A sense of deja-vu washed over Joe for he was looking into beady black eyes. The pair of beady black eyes stared back him and a happy grin lit up the man's face.

"Oh my! Oh my! I've found who I'm looking for! On lucky me!"

"Clown? What are you now? The human version of the White Rabbit?" Joe asked, feeling incredulous. The anxious man shook his head and once again (though Joe was sure he, Clown and Mailman were the same person) denied with a violent shake of his head.

"Never heard of him but we do have plenty of clowns in Um. It is that time of the year. The Queen knows all her guests and she sent me especially to fetch you. What a stroke of luck to have found you! My head is safe!" The man sat down beside Joe and swiped the sweat of his brows. "'Off with his head,' she would say have I failed. Now, I just to rest and thank my lucky stars."

"Ah… my brother is off to find if there's any ferry service to get to the island…" Joe informed the man who shook his head again.

"Nope. The only way you get to the island is when you are covered with fairy dust so you can fly second to the right and straight on till morning!" The man extended his hands out like a magician who had performed some incredible feat successfully and Joe half-expected to hear drum rolls and the organ go "TA-DA!"

"Ah, where are you from? Alice in Wonderland or Peter Pan?" Joe could not resist jibing Clown who did seem to be suffering from some identity disorder, morphing into different characters, each in severe denial of the other. Now, he mixed up the two of the most famous children's novels ever written.

"Does it matter? Pooh! All the dreams of children come from one place- the place of wonder, love, innocence and happiness." Suddenly, the man lost the hesitancy of his earlier self- behaving more like the obnoxious Clown in his flippant tone which was suddenly laced with something mysterious at the end.

"So are you bringing us to Um or not?" Joe decided to go straight to the point because if the man should morph into Clown or worse, continue to moan and groan about being late, he knew he and Frank would be stuck in the airport which was teeming with people to no ends.

"I'm bringing you to the island of Um." The man pushed down his small, rounded glasses and scrutinized Joe's face with his naked eyes. "Yup. That's my orders. The blond one. You didn't dye your hair, did you? It does seem too blond!"

"What about Frank? We are not going to leave him here. I'm not going. I'm waiting for my brother." Joe crossed his arms to show that he meant business. No way was a silly man about five feet two and who had many different characters living inside him going to make Joe desert his brother.

"Frank will have to find his own way to Um, just like you. Only now, your guide has found you." The man explained patiently like one would to a stubborn child and Joe, for a moment, thought he was the one being unreasonable when faced with quiet rationality that did not seemed that rational or rather it seemed rational and at the same time, not.

Joe was terribly confused.

"If I go with you and you're the guide, then how is Frank going to get to Um? He'll be lost! We have to bring him along!"

"Frank is capable of finding his own guide. You're the one that I was given orders to find and find you I did. Off with my head if I bring him along! Let's not tarry! The Queen waits!" Clown a.k.a Mailman a.k.a WhiteRabbit a.k.a LooneyToon grabbed Joe's hand painfully and Joe tried to snatch it away, struggling with the gentleman with his free hand only to find that the funny short man's physique belied his strength.

"Ouch… I have to wait for Frank! He can't find his way! You can't just…"

"Child! Be quiet! Follow me and we'll get there. Frank will get there too. If I leave now, both of you will never see that island of wonder!"

"Then I'll rather not see that island, thank you very much!" Joe defied and glared the man in the eyes with an expression that he liked to think of as severely fierce but a fire dancing in those beady black eyes frightened him more.

"You have to walk your own path to the island and Frank his own as well. The both of you are safe as can be. Do you trust me?"

"I don't! I don't trust you!" Joe hissed and at that exact moment, wondered if Frank was right, that they were walking into an ambush.

"Then I'm walking away. Happy finding that island. I hope to see you there... eventually." The man sighed and then stood up. He glanced at Joe a little sadly and Joe could only glower at him. Then he walked away, leaving Joe quite alone in the alien crowd.

Frank, where are you? Please be quick… I should have gone with you!

"Drinks! Drinks for sale!" A plump, genial looking Thai woman with twinkling eyes stopped before him with a trolley lined with sealed plastic glasses filled with mineral water. Joe was rather surprise for her command of English was pretty good though it was heavily intoned with a foreign accent. It was funny how one would suddenly feel thirsty when water was near, or hungry when the wafts if the scent of food drift by his nose.

"How much?"

"Ten baht!" The lady happily proclaimed while she simultaneously rose up all her fingers and Joe did some mental calculation and was surprised that it was so cheap. He shrugged and reached inside his wallet for the required amount, took a bottle from her after he paid and then poke a straw through the seal to take a long sip.

C'mon Frank! You got to come quickly! I'm sick of waiting…

The last thing he heard was the voice of Clown whispering into his ears, "Have a glass of Wonderland, child."

Frank! NO… you…can't…take...

And then he fell into a dreamless sleep.