The things we never shared.
First of all, there never was a love lost between us. We never shared such kind of feelings towards each other. Sometimes I found it rather strange. My soul was almost dead when Cho Gonou lived at Gojo's; the only thing I really saw was Gojo's hair - his hair's color of blood and of penance. And Sanzo then was only a hindrance on my way to Kanan. To Kanan's body - to be exact. But after that - when Cho Gonou became Cho Hakkai. I seemed to start a new life. I met two men and a boy and both men unmistakably were my saviors. Gojo's help saved my body. But Sanzo's golden light revived my spirit. I couldn't possibly start my new life with a new love. Two betrayals at a time were quite enough, weren't they? But then - three years passed. And our journey began. The journey of Sanzo-ikkou. Come to think about it - quite a test. We never shared an experience of living together before the journey. But it came with such an easiness. Yes, for you I was surely the easiest of the ikkou to share a room when it was necessary. I had a three-year experience living at Gojo's. We always got along. Well. getting along is the best way to pass through this life. You smile, not letting them through the shield of politeness - and they go away, leaving you untouched by emotions. Unfettered. It's quite like Sanzo's "muichimotsu". But that shield never worked with you. Sometimes I regretted it. A lot. Though most of time you respected my decision. We never shared a bond which could excuse that perception, that closeness, that - weakness. We never shared anything! Yes. That's how it is. You would look into the golden eyes - and you would never think about the green ones. I would possibly met the red eyes - and yes, I would never imagine the violet ones instead. We never really shared anything going between us.
- Your staring annoys me. - . - Didn't you hear? - . - Hakkai, what's up with you? Are you sick of breathing? - .Maybe. - I don't want to deal with your silliness right now. Quit it or leave. - Gomen nasai. I'll leave immediately after the rain stops. - Deal. - .Ne, Sanzo. - Eh? - No, it's nothing. - You really want to die, don't you?.. Don't you dare to laugh! - Forgive me. - Chi! . - .The rain stopped. I would leave now. Gojo and Goku have been at the bar for a while now, I need to check them before it's too late. - Come over here. - Why? - I won't repeat myself. - Hai, hai. .- .What was that for, Sanzo? - Leave. You're as stupid today as those two. - Eh. Okay. - And Hakkai? Don't forget to buy me cigarettes. - Of course. While closing the door Hakkai couldn't help but look again at Sanzo's still form at the window. So much for inner contemplation. "We never had a kiss shared. before this day." The youkai touched his lips and smiled - and for once, the smile was rather helpless. So. they did share something? Something going between them? .Outside the inn, a stray raindrop fell from the roof, and the same second the sun caught that drop in its rays. For a moment, there was a shining jewel amidst the air. Then the jewel reached the ground and shattered. But the Earth and the Heaven remembered it.
24.09.2003
First of all, there never was a love lost between us. We never shared such kind of feelings towards each other. Sometimes I found it rather strange. My soul was almost dead when Cho Gonou lived at Gojo's; the only thing I really saw was Gojo's hair - his hair's color of blood and of penance. And Sanzo then was only a hindrance on my way to Kanan. To Kanan's body - to be exact. But after that - when Cho Gonou became Cho Hakkai. I seemed to start a new life. I met two men and a boy and both men unmistakably were my saviors. Gojo's help saved my body. But Sanzo's golden light revived my spirit. I couldn't possibly start my new life with a new love. Two betrayals at a time were quite enough, weren't they? But then - three years passed. And our journey began. The journey of Sanzo-ikkou. Come to think about it - quite a test. We never shared an experience of living together before the journey. But it came with such an easiness. Yes, for you I was surely the easiest of the ikkou to share a room when it was necessary. I had a three-year experience living at Gojo's. We always got along. Well. getting along is the best way to pass through this life. You smile, not letting them through the shield of politeness - and they go away, leaving you untouched by emotions. Unfettered. It's quite like Sanzo's "muichimotsu". But that shield never worked with you. Sometimes I regretted it. A lot. Though most of time you respected my decision. We never shared a bond which could excuse that perception, that closeness, that - weakness. We never shared anything! Yes. That's how it is. You would look into the golden eyes - and you would never think about the green ones. I would possibly met the red eyes - and yes, I would never imagine the violet ones instead. We never really shared anything going between us.
- Your staring annoys me. - . - Didn't you hear? - . - Hakkai, what's up with you? Are you sick of breathing? - .Maybe. - I don't want to deal with your silliness right now. Quit it or leave. - Gomen nasai. I'll leave immediately after the rain stops. - Deal. - .Ne, Sanzo. - Eh? - No, it's nothing. - You really want to die, don't you?.. Don't you dare to laugh! - Forgive me. - Chi! . - .The rain stopped. I would leave now. Gojo and Goku have been at the bar for a while now, I need to check them before it's too late. - Come over here. - Why? - I won't repeat myself. - Hai, hai. .- .What was that for, Sanzo? - Leave. You're as stupid today as those two. - Eh. Okay. - And Hakkai? Don't forget to buy me cigarettes. - Of course. While closing the door Hakkai couldn't help but look again at Sanzo's still form at the window. So much for inner contemplation. "We never had a kiss shared. before this day." The youkai touched his lips and smiled - and for once, the smile was rather helpless. So. they did share something? Something going between them? .Outside the inn, a stray raindrop fell from the roof, and the same second the sun caught that drop in its rays. For a moment, there was a shining jewel amidst the air. Then the jewel reached the ground and shattered. But the Earth and the Heaven remembered it.
24.09.2003