Wash Over Me
Chapter 5
He let the water wash over him, actually it was more of a pound, the water was as strong as it went and the temperature as hot as he could stand. Robin was married to AJ, it was all he could think of, and it was all he could do to stop himself from throwing up. Robin, his Robin, the first person to care about him, truly care about Jason Morgan, not Jason Quartermaine, the person who had taught him about good-bye and hundreds of other things that still seemed pointless, but that kept people happy. Robin, the first person he'd made love with, it wasn't sex like it was with Carly, it was love, it was looking into her eyes, feeling her heartbeat as he held her close…She was married to AJ
He tried to console himself with that it was a marriage of convenience; they were only married because of Amanda. It didn't work though, he thought of Sonny and Carly, they had married because of a child and they had fallen in love, two people who shouldn't have worked together did. He thought of himself and Brenda, he may not have fallen in love with her, but he knew that they were now friends and he would do almost anything for her. What would stop Robin and AJ from falling in love?
He should his head sending water flying everywhere the shower didn't hit, what the hell was he thinking?
He groaned and buried his head under the showerhead. It was just because she was here now. It was the first time in years that he had seen her face, heard her voice that was why he felt like this. That was why it felt like it had at the bridge that final time they said goodbye.
Out of sight, out of mind, that was how it had been for years, but now, she was here again…
He didn't know how to think, how to act, years may have passed since she told AJ, but right now it seemed like yesterday. It seemed like yesterday he said good-bye to her on that bridge, glad she was leaving because he knew he wouldn't be able to see her on a daily basis, but just days before that he had loved her, so deeply and so passionately, but he couldn't leave Michael…Michael had an even tighter hold on his heart than Robin.
He shook his head and laughed, Robin had always been warning him about Carly and everything she had said had come true. When Carly didn't get on the plane…when she went to the Q's…sleeping with AJ while she claimed to care so much about him and Sonny…
He shook his head once more, trying to eradicate the image of her walking down the stairs from his brain, over a year he spent trying to forget what he saw and he never could, eventually he had learned to ignore it.
Coming home though and not being Michael's father anymore, that still hurt though. Every time he heard Jason look to Sonny for protection, for comfort, it hurt more than he would ever admit to anyone, he couldn't really blame that on Carly after all he had left, but he just couldn't stay in this town then, he couldn't stay here without doing something he would regret.
"You look troubled" He felt her arms slip around his waist and knew he had to push these thoughts from his head. He bent his head down and connected his lips to hers and prayed to forget.